Funny/Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey

Homeward Bound: The Incredible Journey

Chance: I'll give him the old puppy-eyed look. (whimpering)
Chef: Sorry fella, it's not for dogs. (some meatballs fall off the table)
Chance: Flying meat! (eating the meatballs) Ahh! Hot! Hot!

Chance sniffing the fat chef's butt (including closeup).
"Must be someone new. I never forget a face."
Chance chasing chickens:
Chance: Hallelujah, I've died and gone to Kentucky!
Later...
Chance: Hey, which one of you are regular and which ones are extra crispy?
- He also chases a cornered duck.
  Chance: Hey hey, come on, I'm not gonna hurt you I just wanna chew on your neck.
- He later gets chased off by a turkey, unsure of what it is.
  Chance: Whoa! What the?! (Runs away) Help! It's Birdzilla! I swear I'll never eat a McNugget again!
While sleeping in the forest.
(wings flapping, Chance raises his head)
Shadow: (annoyed) Now what?
Chance: (voice shaking) There's something out there.
Sassy: (trying to scare Chance) Ooooooooooooohhhh!
Shadow: Enough, Sassy! Now sleep!
At one point in the movie, the dog playing Chance charges face-first into a sapling at full throttle and then just keeps on running. This event was clearly accidental, but the sheer spontaneity and reality of it is what makes it so hilarious; it wouldn't have been nearly as funny if it had been planned in advance with a CG dog.
- And Michael J. Fox rolls with it, saying I Meant to Do That.
And this gem:
Chance: Hey! Remember hot dogs?
Shadow: Oh yeah, never much cared for the name though...
Chance: Well... I didn't think they were made of actual dogs...
Shadow: I didn't think they were made of actual meat.
While trying to escape a cougar:
Chance: I'm such a wimp! I'm running from a cat!
Shadow: I won't tell if you won't!
Chance: 'Course, this is no ordinary housecat. This is, like, Arnold Schwarzenkitty!
This too:
Guard: Here, kitty kitty kitty kitty.
Sassy: "Here kitty kitty kitty." Not in your life, chubby.
Guard: Here kitty kittty. Here, kitty. SCAT! Here, kitty kitty kitty.
Sassy: No, dummy dummy dummy dummy.
Guard: [walking away] Stupid cat!
Sassy: Hmmm! What a bozo.
- Later, when Sassy gets him to chase her:
  Sassy: Alright, this way, Thunder Butt!
- During that chase, they're seen running back and forth between halls from an intersection. At one instance, he chases Sassy down the hall going right and appearing from the left end. As they to into the right hall, Sassy appears right from the hall she just walked out of.
  Sassy: Am I bad? Oh, yeah!
Chance's confession.
Chance: Okay, okay, I'll talk! I left a gift on the carpet. I let Sassy take the heat for when I unrolled the toilet paper all over the house. I stole underwear on three occasions! [the vet yanks a quill out of his face] Okay, okay, four, four!
The entire 'fishing scene'
Chance: Woah, there's one! Oh, there's one! Woah, sit fish! Stay fish. Hey, Shadow, how'd you get one of those?
Shadow: Sassy.
Chance:: Stay fish! Sassy, help me out here will you, I'm starving.
Sassy: (*taunting*) Say it first.
Chance:: Oh come on!
Sassy:Say it!
Chance: *Grudgingly* OK, cats rule and dogs drool!
Sassy: I can't hear you.
Chance: Cats rule and dogs drool, you happy!
Sassy: Thank you, precious!
Chance You're welcome, cup cake.
- Then right after that, when he chases away some bear cubs, and along comes Mama Bear
  Chance: Gosh, you look hungry may I recommend a trout?! *yelps and runs off*
  - Then
    Sassy: Chance, when will you grow up?! That bear could have eaten you! Do you realize how painful that would have been. . .for the bear!
    Chance: Oh, go hack up a hairball.
    Sassy: Oh, now ''that'' hurt. Oof! ''Really'' hurt!
- Sassy in general is funny, she is well-named.

Homeward Bound II: Lost in San Francisco

Shadow: [about Chance] You know you miss him.

Sassy: Okay, fine! I miss his stupid jokes, and his stupid face, and his stupid... stupidness!

Shadow: Oh, Sassy, stop it.

Sassy: And I'm ''stupidly'' starting to worry about him!

Also, after Chance and Bando (Delilah's wannabe boyfriend) argue over her:
Riley: Enough! Bando, knock it off!
Bando: (humbly) Sorry, Riley. I wasn't trying to start nothing. I'm done. I'm done. (under his breath) Stupid lost dog, trying to steal my woman. Homewrecker!
Chance terrified of the shadows in the alley.
Chance: Uh guys, they're big, they're huge, they're coming to get me!
Scenes with Pete:
Chance: You know there's a furry ugly thing growing out of your butt?
Pete: Huh?
Chance: It's your tail, genius! (bites it)
Pete: YEEOOWW!!!

Shadow: Sassy, can you get down?
Sassy: Not with old "pffff" face down here.
Pete: You're still there, kitty?
Sassy: Oh, duh!
The animals are sitting in front of the plane:
Chance: I wasn't scared. I wasn't scared for one little... Bit.
Sassy: Obviously.
- There was right after when they see the airport security chasing them and Sassy tells them to stay and get hit while she runs off.
Later on, Sassy starts trying to warm up to a little boy with a cat and Chance decides to try it himself.
Lady: Beat it Moron. Go Away!
Chance: Meow. Meow.
Lady: GO AWAY!
Chance: Meow? Wait, wait, Meow! (lady closes door).
And when Chance starts talking about how Dogs always know where they�re going.
Chance: We always know what's in fro.. ouff!
- Followed immediately after by:
Ashcan: Hey Punk... Watch It!
Chance: Woo, no offense dude, but you need a bath.
THIS IS CRAZY. WHAT'D THAT DOG EAT FOR BREAKFAST? JET FUEL?
And then chance jumps into a hole while, again, talking about how he always knows what he's doing.
Delilah wants to show Chance her favorite part of the city.
Chance: Does it involve food? (Runs into a trashcan) Meant to do that!
Finally, Chance gets Ashcan and Pete to chase him, and Ashcan gets on the seesaw, with Pete right behind him, which prevents it from going down. Ashcan has to point this out to Pete, and he gets off... for the seesaw to come up and hit him right under the chin.