Funny / Dungeons & Dragons Online

  • The dragon the Devourer cult is using to freeze up Korthos is being controlled by a mind flayer named Drastix Achthend. In Draconic, this translates to "dragon food."
  • During one mission where you have to retrieve a signet brooch that has been stolen by a street gang called the Quickfeet operating from the sewers, out of nowhere you are attacked by a Quickfoot named Quinn. He introduces himself by saying "Tremble before the might of Quinn!" He's not even an optional objective and goes down faster than the basic Mook you meet in the quest.
  • During one mission in the Sharn Syndicate chain, you are supposed to escort a warforged who retrieves an item from a bank vault for his boss... Only it was a heist, and you were supposed to take the blame. After escaping the vault, you find the alarms going, and a lot of city guards... The optional objective is to not kill any of them. Not avoiding being seen. Avoiding killing the city guards. If you are spotted but still manage to turn off the alarms without killing them, you are treated with an epic Not in My Contract moment...
    Guard Folger: "Aww..., who turned off the alarm? House Kundarak only pays me to kill thieves when the alarm's been triggered. Today's your lucky day. You're free to go."
  • The person that respecs your feats is named... Fred.
  • The quests Delirium and Acute Delirium(which take place in the same inn) are full of these moments. Due to interaction with creatures from Xoriat, the realm of madness, you: teach a key a lesson, have a drinking contest with beholders, fight hambies(zombie ham), can grief an Elder Beholder that wants to solve a tile puzzle, fight puzzle tiles, escort beds and bookcases to form an airship, travel to Xoriat in the airship while holding off beholders from boarding said ship, and going into a giant beholder to receive the scepter that caused all of this.
    • You forgot the best part: to escape said giant beholder you have to make him puke you and your party back up.
    • Also, the dialogue from the mimic that ate the scepter, the Dungeon Master, and the beholders make this quest even more hilarious.
  • In the quest Siegebreaker, there's a rest shrine located in a disgusting pool where the enemy have been using it as an open air bathroom. If you're not careful and fall in, you get hit with a debuff called "What's That Smell?". And the ledges around it are VERY small.
    • In the same quest, detonating the Droaam bombs spawns two optional minibosses, a kobold and an ogre named Brinky and Pain respectively. Their dialogue ends with:
      Pain: What are we going to do now, Brinky?
      Brinky: The same thing we do every day, Pain. Take over the world!
    • Yet another one from Siegebreaker; there is a (rather fat) half-orc miniboss named Skinny. He's the cook, and has an attack called Frying Pan in Face, complete with sound effects, a brief stun effect, and about twelve points of damage.
  • All of the Kobold dialogue in the Challenge Packs.
  • Otto's Sphere of Dancing . It's a disco ball floating in the air that....................makes nearly everything break into dance. It lasts up to 80 seconds.
  • From general chat:
    No amount of alcohol will help you forget The Pit
  • From Irrestone Inlet, when you kill the boss, Yaaryar "Yaaryar shrieks furiously, 'I'll kill you! Kill you all... grrghh....' Then he dies, effectively calling his own bluff."
  • Named monsters sometimes have a Boss Subtitles under their names. In a challenge, one is Ugg <Confused Meatshield> and the other is Dr Will Eve Rushmore <Renegade Master Wizard Himself>.
  • The Bargain of Blood quest from the Sentinels of Stormreach pack has some pretty hilarious moments. You turn an open air tavern into a warzone, with a fireball happy wizard, a meatshield swinging a big sword/axe... And the tavern patron just just wonder where the waitress went (she hit the deck).
    • And the Magic Mouths advertising for the service the pirate run bazaar offers. Some try to sound legitimate but are blatantly transparent as to the criminal origin of the goods, other just straight up tell you they set up a slave trade... All are just hilarious.
  • The end "fight" of Partycrashers if you complete all the optional objectives is hilarious.
    Lokael: "Ahh, so you're the famous Viceroy of House Phiarlan. I notice you've emptied your cup — you really liked that drink, didn't you? Too bad for you it was POISON! Baw-ha-ha-ha!"
    Cyan: "I'm afraid your Poisonmaster didn't live to touch the Viceroy's cup... tragic accident in the Library, all those paper cuts...."
    Lokael: "Touche! But, I always have a backup plan... like BRAINWASHING your own guards to kill you! Baw-ha-ha-ha!"
    Cyan: "I'm afraid the guards aren't coming... they're too busy burying the corpse of your Spellmaster."
    Lokael: "Impressive... but I always have a backup to my backup... such as a full TROUPE of Cabal assassins, hidden right under your nose, BAW-HA-HA-HA!"
    Cyan: "You mean the Tieflings in the upstairs private rooms? I'm sorry, they didn't have invitations, so I had them... flushed."
    Lokael: "What? All my wonderful plans... ruined...."
    Cyan: "(Bluff) There, there, it's been a terribly hard day for you, hasn't it? Here, have a drink and try to relax."
    Lokael: "(Gulp, gulp) Ugh, my stomach...." *collapses*
  • At the end of Heroic Prove Your Worth, an orc tests you to see if you can talk like a pirate. If you have a high enough Bluff skill, you can pass the test perfectly with:
    Player Character: "(Bluff) Yaaarrrrr."