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Funny: Defiance
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    Season One 
Pilot
  • Irisa and Tommy.
    • When Tommy has to arrest her, Nolan indicates the handcuffs would be a bad idea. Considering this, Tommy just points and lets Irisa walk to jail freely.
    • When trying to make conversation, he simply says of Irisa, "you are very, very disconcerting."
    • Finally, when Irisa explains how she could have escaped and killed him, his only response is "What is wrong with you?"
  • The genetically engineered, super soldier killing machine is disabled by a punch to the arse. Doubly hilarious given how downright threatening and murderous they are in the game.
  • "Did you seriously just call me 'sweetheart'?" "It was my second choice."

"Down In the Ground Where the Dead Men Go"
  • Nolan having some fun at Rafe's expense after learning his father made dog food before the war.
  • Alak and his mother, the latter of whom is in the middle of a famous Castithan bath. This does not stop her from giving him a very long, very close hug.
  • Tommy saving the Castithan being tortured for cowardice by arresting him.
    Castithan: What for?
    Tommy: [thinks about it] Loitering.
  • Crossing over with CMOA, Stahma's casual story about how Datak challenged her betrothed to a duel for her hand.
    Christie: Did he win?
    Stahma: They never got the chance. On their way to the duel my man of great honor was accidentally flushed out an airlock. It was a tragic accident.
    • Christie then innocently asks how someone can be accidentally flushed out an airlock. Stahma just laughs.

"The Devil In the Dark"
  • Tommy being told to watch over Irisa when she storms off. He returns a few moments later with a bit of blood on his head.
    Tommy: She threw me off the roller.

"A Well Respected Man"
  • This exchange, after Rafe has a blow up with his son, with a random miner in earshot.
    Rafe: If you tell a soul about what you just saw here, I'll dump your dead body down a mineshaft.
  • At the end, when Datak gets his council seat, he calmly makes his rounds then, as polite as possible, shuts the door in Nolan's face.

"The Serpent's Egg"
  • Nolan doesn't even pretend he can tell Irisa what to do.
    Nolan: Can I trust you to be a good girl and behave yourself while I'm gone?
    Irisa: Probably not.
    Nolan: That's my girl.

"Brothers In Arms"
  • How does Nolan know that Datak has been taken hostage by Pol Madis? Datak was acting nice.
  • Datak getting an enema during the closing montage. His actor absolutely sells what he's about to go through.

"Good Bye Blue Sky"
  • The random idiot in homemade armor who makes the brilliant decision to taunt the Razor Rain storm. He promptly gets nailed by a chunk. Even better, after it happens, he seems actually kind of surprised he's still alive and his armor worked.
  • Amanda calling the radio station to get her album played. When Alak insults her taste in music, her response is simply;
    Amanda: Listen you little punk, I'm the damn mayor! Play "Shiny Happy People" or you're fired!

"I Just Wasn't Made For These Times"
  • Tommy's sailor lingo, taken from Moby-Dick. Nolan finds it annoying.
  • McClintok finding out about being played by Robert Pattinson in a film about the space station.
    McClintok: Who?
    Nolan: Twilight.
    McClintok: Ah...was he the vampire or the werewolf?
    Rafe: Don't look at me.
    Nolan: Amanda?
    Amanda: What, just because I'm a girl, I'd know something like that?
    Nolan and Rafe: Yes.
    Amanda: ...he was the vampire.
  • Nolan laughing like a madman when McClintok asks about the state of air travel and the space program in 2046;
    McClinktok: But what about space travel? What about exploration?
    Nolan: I think people have had more than enough of outer space at this point in time!

"If I Ever Leave This World Alive"

  • Alak tells everyone who is listening to his radio show that face masks won't help protect people from disease, Gilligan Cut to a seller turning off the radio and continuing to sell face masks.
  • At the end of the episode, Doc Yewll lampshades the Hollywood Tactics of the first two episodes, the stupidity of causing a Volge attack and then trying to flood the town with radiation. Nicky mutters "That was all Birch's idea."
  • "Ozin, get your head out of Datak's ass, and listen." - Amanda Rosewater

"The Bride Wore Black"
  • When Irisa shows up at the wedding Tommy comments she's not wearing any knives. Irisa reveals they were just strapped to her leg under the skirt.
  • Irisa's wedding attire in general. Very...unique.
  • When Rafe tells Datak that the mines will go to the Irathients when he is dead. Dangerously Genre Savvy much?
  • Everyone assuming that Datak was angry over Christie not wearing an eye shield.
  • Rafe casually deflecting Datak's racism and then pointing out the big flaw in what he just said;
    Datak: ... and the scent of your pink skin sickens me!
    Rafe: *Laughs* Does this skin look pink to you?

"Everything is Broken"
  • "Keep it up. I'll skin your golfball head and wear it as a hat." "What's a golfball?"
  • When Yewll and a E-Rep scientist are arguing a means of removing the keys from Irisa's body via electrocution:
    Yewll: It'll fry her.
    Scientist: It's survivable.
    Yewll: So's castration.

    Season Two 
"The Opposite of Hallelujah"
  • Yewll and Datak are speaking in the Internment Camp Reverie:
    Datak: Color me intrigued.
    Yewll: Color you anything. You'd be more interesting to look at.
    • Later, when they're spending the night huddled against each other for warmth, Datak takes advantage of Yewll being asleep to give himself a handjob — using her hand. When she wakes up, she's not amused.
    Yewll: (flatly) Want me to check for lumps? (pulls hand away briskly)

"In My Secret Life"
  • Stahma, Alak, and Christie having the most awkward family bath time ever. "You kids and your 'personal space'."
  • Nolan's Incredibly Lame Pun about Berlin's name.
  • Berlin's dismissal of Nolan's "happy cowboy" routine, including calling him out on watching too much Star Wars as a kid and referring to Irisa as his "hot Chewbacca".
  • In a bit of Black Comedy, while Pottinger is cutting off Yewll's finger, Churchill dully tells her to "think of something happy. Like Christmas."
  • The stasis fence interview.

"The Cord and the Ax"
  • Stahma smells Christie's pregnancy.
    Christie: You—you can smell that? You can seriously smell that.
  • Pottinger taking Nolan out for a stroll, and informing him that he's interested in Amanda.
    Nolan: You know, I enlisted pretty young, so I never got a chance to experience high school. This right here? Pretty much what I imagined it would be like.

"Beasts of Burden"
  • When Nolan and Amanda are fooling around, she mentions that she has a staff meeting in ten minutes so they have to cut it short.
    Nolan: I'm not getting sex because you have to go work in a whorehouse.
    Amanda: The irony is delicious.
  • Then Irisa barges in on them to bring Nolan to the mayor's office. Amanda asks if she knows how to knock.
    Irisa: I was raised by him.
    Nolan: It's a good point.
  • Doc on how she got out of prison
    Nolan: You got yourself paroled from Camp Reverie? How'd you manage that?
    Yewll: Raw sex appeal.

"Put the Damage On"
  • Rafe gets to try out the Tarr family bath. Hilarity Ensues when Stahma decides to join him.
    • Just Rafe, period. First when trying to get has politely fend off the Tarr's attractive young servant girl, his attempt to keep his composure in the incident above, and finally he gets some good snark in on Datak when the latter shows up to apologize.
  • More of a Tear Jerker when you consider the full context, but this exchange when Doc just barely shows up in time to save Amanda:
    Nolan: Where the hell have you been?
    Yewll: Booty call.
  • Yewll and Lev:
    Lev: I didn't come here to be healed. I came here to be forgiven.
    Yewll: You're obviously suffering from dementia as well.
  • Apparently Doc was quite the romantic poet when she was younger.
    Lev: 'Our bodies were the temple, and our prayers so beautiful they must have made God cry.'
    Yewll: I wrote that to get in your pants.
  • Yewll gets a lot of good snark in this episode, especially with Datak.
    (when Datak complains about his situation) And you bear no responsibility for any of that.
    (later)
    Datak: I've killed men for speaking to me like that.
    Yewll: First step is admitting there's a problem; very good! Now, I want you to burn the Castithan crazy scrolls and fix your family from the inside.
  • Datak even gets some good lines at his own expense.
    Christie: You're a disgusting troll!
    Datak: Well, what family doesn't hit a rough patch now and then? I'll see myself out.
  • Datak hiring a male Irathient prostitute. It turns out the Irathient is also an agent for the Votanis Collective, but he is angry at Datak for potentially wasting his time when he could be male-prostituting for real money.

"This Woman's Work"
  • When Rafe goes to visit Datak, he asks him where the bath is. Datak says there's a shower out back. Rafe laughs—as he learned last episode, only the lowest Castithans use showers.
  • Datak, now living in a hovel made out of an old shipping container, takes a moment to put Rafe's beer on a coaster.

"If Only You Could See Her Through My Eyes."
  • Datak Tarr, in the middle of having sex with Jalina:
    Datak: What, hearing my name over and over again? Do you think I'm some kind of egomaniac?
    Jalina: ...No.
  • Later, Doc Ywell comments on the matter:
    Datak: Jalina was sworn to our home since she was a child. I adored her.
    Yewll: That's one word for it.
  • And a bit later:
    "There are two kinds of friends in the world. The kind that helps you move a dead whore, and me.
  • There's something weirdly funny about Datak and Rafe's takeout of a corrupt organ-harvesting surgeon - specifically, Rafe's oddly disinterested manner as Datak thumbs out said surgeon's eyes. He's not even horrified, he's just irritated, looking like he's thinking "dammit, he's doing this again?" or "There's just no helping it, is there?"
    • And then there's their reaction as they just leave him lying there.
    • Rafe implying he gouged both his eyes out cause he ran with scissors.
  • In a Call Back to a first-season episode, Christie takes a page out of her father's book while Alak is yelling at her over her Cosplaying.
    Alak: How would you feel if I painted my skin Human pink?
    Christie: My skin's not pink.

"Slouching Towards Bethlehem
  • Datak actually taking offense that Stahma was questioned instead of him about the bomb planted in New York.
    Datak: That's disrespectful.
  • Tommy confronts Berlin about being in a relationship with Nolan. She insists that they aren't dating, just having lots of sex.
  • Nolan and Irisa's conversation about trying to find the location of Kenya's kidnappers suddenly turns into a typical father-daughter argument about the family car when Irisa decides that she's the one going to go out and look for them:
    Nolan: I want you safe in town.
    Irisa: I'm not safe anywhere.
    Nolan: Okay, but...
    Irisa: And I can't die.
    Nolan: Okay, but...
    Irisa: And Amanda needs you here.
    Nolan: (sigh) What do you need?
    Irisa: Keys would be nice. (grabs the roller keys and leaves)
    Nolan: (flatly, to the empty room) Be careful.

"Painted from Memory"
  • Nolan dancing around his roll in the sheets with Berlin around Tommy...for a few seconds, anyway.
  • Nolan, after recognizing a symbol described by Kenya, goes to Berlin to confirm his theory.
    Nolan: [bursts into Berlin's workroom] Need you to take off your shirt. This is important.
    Berlin: [unfazed, looks at Kenya and then back at her film] Well, if we're gonna have a three-way, I'm Berlin.
  • Stahma, visibly rattled at seeing Kenya is dragging Datak with her into the forest.
    Stahma: How long can a human being survive without air?
    Datak: Do I look like a biologist?
    Stahma: You look like a pauper, but that's incidental.
  • Stahma mentions that she marked Kenya's grave with flowers...and then they crest the hill to find the entire field covered in lavender flowers.
    • Much later in the night, after several hours of fruitless digging, Stahma throws down her shovel in frustration and starts ranting angrily in Casti. Meanwhile, Datak continues to dig, unfazed.

"Bottom of the World"
  • When Ambassador Tennity tries to pick a fight with Amanda regarding luggage, Pottinger takes the Ambassador aside, reminds her of her crimes, incompetence at committing them, and the solid evidence against her, then suggests that she "toddle that well-marbled ass back there and pick up your own damn bags."
  • The entire scene with Rafe, Christie, Alak and Quentin. The undertones and ironies in the dialog are rather humorous. Also, after Christie's revelation that having a half-Castithan child is kicking her own senses into high gear and having seen Alak playing some serious tonsil hockey with Deirdre, watching the part where Christie backs off from Alak, claiming she has a cold, is rather amusing as he looks honestly very puzzled.
  • The visit to the Gulanite mines has Nolan warning Berlin of danger morphing into understated flirting about her eyebrows, to Irisa's annoyance, and Tennity and Amanda exchanging insults.
  • Datak Tarr has been reduced to pulling the equivalent of three-card monte scams to make money.

"Doll Parts"
  • While Amanda and Berlin are searching Deidre Lamb's room for evidence, Berlin opens a box with several large, strung-together beads and absent-mindedly wonders what they're for. Amanda advises her to rebox them and wash her hands.
  • An extremely sick Castithan man walks into the lawkeeper's office and confesses to Deidre Lamb's murder. His performance hits on every single cliche you can think of; the only way it could be more blatant that he was lying was if he was holding a big neon sign.
    Castithan: I killed her. I loved her too much.
    Amanda: Really. What was her real name?
    [beat]
    Castithan: ...I never wanted to know. It would have spoiled the magic.
    Amanda: Do I look like an idiot!?
  • Stahma and Datak both assuming it was each other who threw Dierdre from the top of the Arch.
  • Alak's face when Christie reveals that she was the one who killed Dierdre is a darkly funny mix of confused and aroused that basically says "I have the weirdest boner right now". And "Oh Gods, I married my mother!"

    Other 

"Bonus Material"
  • Alak Tarr's radio recaps, especially when he stops in the middle to advertise for various businesses in Defiance. Also asking people to stop referring to his mother as 'Hot Mama Stahma'.
  • One of the outtakes has Rafe and Luke discussing the golden MacGuffin and what it may be. With the straight possible face, Graham (Rafe) says: "It's a suppository. Hurts like hell."
  • In a recap of their top 10 moments of the season thus far, the Stahma/Kenya love scene was titled 'Gayliens'.
  • While sitting down and discuss the Datak-Nolan fight, Tony Curran talks about their preparation. He casually brushes aside the stunt coordinator's concerns - "Hey, we're just acting here, you know." - until he looks over and sees Grant Bowler psyching himself up for the fight...
  • The series of behind-the-scenes featurettes hosted by Jesse Rath are full of funny moments. Among other things, he speaks at length about learning the Castithan language, and just how much they say isn't subtitled because it's so filthy.
    "You can't just say jhondera like it's nothing. You have to sound like you're lifting a house."

"Meta"
  • When asked which character they would like to play other than their own, Grant (Nolan) and Stephanie (Irisa) say they'd love to play a Sensoth. Tony (Datak) and Jaime (Stahma) on the other hand would play each other.

General
  • At least 60% of the comments that come out of Dr. Yewll's mouth are this.
  • If you look carefully, you'll notice that Nolan's gun is taped together.

"Lost Ones" (Web Interquel)
  • Nolan, asking Irisa about the cult, says something in Irathient that translates to "Yesterday crazy God party."
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