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Funny: Defiance
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    Season One 
Pilot
  • Irisa and Tommy.
    • When Tommy has to arrest her, Nolan indicates the handcuffs would be a bad idea. Considering this, Tommy just points and lets Irisa walk to jail freely.
    • When trying to make conversation, he simply says of Irisa, "you are very, very disconcerting."
    • Finally, when Irisa explains how she could have escaped and killed him, his only response is "What is wrong with you?"
  • The genetically engineered, super soldier killing machine is disabled by a punch to the arse. Doubly hilarious given how downright threatening and murderous they are in the game.
  • "Did you seriously just call me 'sweetheart'?" "It was my second choice."

"Down In the Ground Where the Dead Men Go"
  • Nolan having some fun at Rafe's expense after learning his father made dog food before the war.
  • Alak and his mother, the latter of whom is in the middle of a famous Castithan bath. This does not stop her from giving him a very long, very close hug.
  • Tommy saving the Castithan being tortured for cowardice by arresting him.
    Castithan: What for?
    Tommy: [thinks about it] Loitering.
  • Crossing over with CMOA, Stahma's casual story about how Datak challenged her betrothed to a duel for her hand.
    Christie: Did he win?
    Stahma: They never got the chance. On their way to the duel my man of great honor was accidentally flushed out an airlock. It was a tragic accident.
    • Christie then innocently asks how someone can be accidentally flushed out an airlock. Stahma just laughs.

"The Devil In the Dark"
  • Tommy being told to watch over Irisa when she storms off. He returns a few moments later with a bit of blood on his head.
    Tommy: She threw me off the roller.

"A Well Respected Man"
  • This exchange, after Rafe has a blow up with his son, with a random miner in earshot.
    Rafe: If you tell a soul about what you just saw here, I'll dump your dead body down a mineshaft.
  • At the end, when Datak gets his council seat, he calmly makes his rounds then, as polite as possible, shuts the door in Nolan's face.

"The Serpent's Egg"
  • Nolan doesn't even pretend he can tell Irisa what to do.
    Nolan: Can I trust you to be a good girl and behave yourself while I'm gone?
    Irisa: Probably not.
    Nolan: That's my girl.

"Brothers In Arms"
  • How does Nolan know that Datak has been taken hostage by Pol Madis? Datak was acting nice.
  • Datak getting an enema during the closing montage. His actor absolutely sells what he's about to go through.

"Good Bye Blue Sky"
  • The random idiot in homemade armor who makes the brilliant decision to taunt the Razor Rain storm. He promptly gets nailed by a chunk. Even better, after it happens, he seems actually kind of surprised he's still alive and his armor worked.
  • Amanda calling the radio station to get her album played. When Alak insults her taste in music, her response is simply;
    Amanda: Listen you little punk, I'm the damn mayor! Play "Shiny Happy People" or you're fired!

"I Just Wasn't Made For These Times"
  • Tommy's sailor lingo, taken from Moby-Dick. Nolan finds it annoying.
  • McClintok finding out about being played by Robert Pattinson in a film about the space station.
    McClintok: Who?
    Nolan: Twilight.
    McClintok: Ah...was he the vampire or the werewolf?
    Rafe: Don't look at me.
    Nolan: Amanda?
    Amanda: What, just because I'm a girl, I'd know something like that?
    Nolan and Rafe: Yes.
    Amanda: ...he was the vampire.
  • Nolan laughing like a madman when McClintok asks about the state of air travel and the space program in 2046;
    McClinktok: But what about space travel? What about exploration?
    Nolan: I think people have had more than enough of outer space at this point in time!

"If I Ever Leave This World Alive"

  • Alak tells everyone who is listening to his radio show that face masks won't help protect people from disease, Gilligan Cut to a seller turning off the radio and continuing to sell face masks.
  • At the end of the episode, Doc Yewll lampshades the Hollywood Tactics of the first two episodes, the stupidity of causing a Volge attack and then trying to flood the town with radiation. Nicky mutters "That was all Birch's idea."
  • "Ozin, get your head out of Datak's ass, and listen." - Amanda Rosewater

"The Bride Wore Black"
  • When Irisa shows up at the wedding Tommy comments she's not wearing any knives. Irisa reveals they were just strapped to her leg under the skirt.
  • Irisa's wedding attire in general. Very...unique.
  • When Rafe tells Datak that the mines will go to the Irathians when he is dead. Dangerously Genre Savvy much?
  • Everyone assuming that Datak was angry over Christie not wearing an eye shield.
  • Rafe casually deflecting Datak's racism and then pointing out the big flaw in what he just said;
    Datak: ... and the scent of your pink skin sickens me!
    Rafe: *Laughs* Does this skin look pink to you?

"Everything is Broken"
  • "Keep it up. I'll skin your golfball head and wear it as a hat." "What's a golfball?"
  • When Yewll and a E-Rep scientist are arguing a means of removing the keys from Irisa's body via electrocution:
    Yewll: It'll fry her.
    Scientist: It's survivable.
    Yewll: So's castration.

    Season Two 
"The Opposite of Hallelujah"
  • Yewll and Datak are speaking in the Internment Camp Reverie:
    Datak: Color me intrigued.
    Yewll: Color you anything. You'd be more interesting to look at.
    • Later, when they're spending the night huddled against each other for warmth, Datak takes advantage of Yewll being asleep to give himself a handjob — using her hand. When she wakes up, she's not amused.
    Yewll: (flatly) Want me to check for lumps? (pulls hand away briskly)

"In My Secret Life"
  • Stahma, Alak, and Christie having the most awkward family bath time ever. "You kids and your 'personal space'."
  • Nolan's Incredibly Lame Pun about Berlin's name.
  • Berlin's dismissal of Nolan's "happy cowboy" routine, including calling him out on watching too much Star Wars as a kid and referring to Irisa as his "hot Chewbacca".
  • In a bit of Black Comedy, while Pottinger is cutting off Yewll's finger, Churchill dully tells her to "think of something happy. Like Christmas."
  • The stasis fence interview.

"The Cord and the Ax"
  • Stahma smells Christie's pregnancy.
    Christie: You—you can smell that? You can seriously smell that.
  • Pottinger taking Nolan out for a stroll, and informing him that he's interested in Amanda.
    Nolan: You know, I enlisted pretty young, so I never got a chance to experience high school. This right here? Pretty much what I imagined it would be like.

"Beasts of Burden"
  • When Nolan and Amanda are fooling around, she mentions that she has a staff meeting in ten minutes so they have to cut it short.
    Nolan: I'm not getting sex because you have to go work in a whorehouse.
    Amanda: The irony is delicious.
  • Then Irisa barges in on them to bring Nolan to the mayor's office. Amanda asks if she knows how to knock.
    Irisa: I was raised by him.
    Nolan: It's a good point.

    Other 

"Bonus Material"
  • Alak Tarr's radio recaps, especially when he stops in the middle to advertise for various businesses in Defiance. Also asking people to stop referring to his mother as 'Hot Mama Stahma'.
  • One of the outtakes has Rafe and Luke discussing the golden MacGuffin and what it may be. With the straight possible face, Graham (Rafe) says: "It's a suppository. Hurts like hell."
  • In a recap of their top 10 moments of the season thus far, the Stahma/Kenya love scene was titled 'Gayliens'.
  • While sitting down and discuss the Datak-Nolan fight, Tony Curran talks about their preparation. He casually brushes aside the stunt coordinator's concerns - "Hey, we're just acting here, you know." - until he looks over and sees Grant Bowler psyching himself up for the fight...
  • The series of behind-the-scenes featurettes hosted by Jesse Rath are full of funny moments. Among other things, he speaks at length about learning the Castithan language, and just how much they say isn't subtitled because it's so filthy.
    "You can't just say jhondera like it's nothing. You have to sound like you're lifting a house."

"Meta"
  • When asked which character they would like to play other than their own, Grant (Nolan) and Stephanie (Irisa) say they'd love to play a sensoth. Tony (Datak) and Jaime (Stahma) on the other hand would play each other.

General
  • At least 60% of the comments that come out of Dr. Yewll's mouth are this.
  • If you look carefully, you'll notice that Nolan's gun is taped together.

"Lost Ones" (Web Interquel)
  • Nolan, asking Irisa about the cult, says something in Irathian which translates to "Yesterday crazy God party."
Death in ParadiseFunny/Live-Action TVDegrassi

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