| 1 | %%For tropes where Administrivia/NoRealLifeExamplesPlease or Administrivia/InUniverseExamplesOnly apply, please remember, this is a work portraying real life, which is explicitly protected by the first paragraph of No Real Life Examples, Please. |
| 2 | [[NotAlwaysWorking/TropesAToE Tropes A to E]] | Tropes F to L | [[NotAlwaysWorking/TropesMToS Tropes M to S]] ([[MeanBoss/NotAlwaysWorking Mean Boss]]) ([[PointyHairedBoss/NotAlwaysWorking Pointy-Haired Boss]]) | [[NotAlwaysWorking/TropesTToZ Tropes T to Z]] |
| 3 | |
| 4 | [[Website/NotAlwaysWorking Back to the main page]] |
| 5 | |
| 6 | |
| 7 | [[foldercontrol]] |
| 8 | |
| 9 | [[folder:F]] |
| 10 | * FaceYourFears: [[https://notalwaysright.com/dog-gone-crazy-3/156074/ This "dog-sitter"]] turns out to have a ''massive'' dog phobia. She thought being a dog-sitter would be a good way of getting over it. From what little we see of her, it doesn't seem to be working. |
| 11 | * FailedASpotCheck: Now has [[FailedASpotCheck/NotAlwaysRight its own page]]! |
| 12 | * FailedFutureForecast: [[https://notalwaysright.com/geographically-challenged-anxiety/93107/ Amazingly subverted here.]] The employee is paranoid that they left the oven on and could potentially start a fire, but their older brother confirms everything is fine. Later, the microwave in the staff room suddenly ''catches on fire'' (due to the manager punching in an extra zero). The employee is in disbelief that they actually made a correct prediction, but not in the right place. |
| 13 | * FailsafeFailure: OP admits in [[https://notalwaysright.com/remember-fire-bad/285072/ this story]] that the sprinklers and strobe lights should have kicked in in response to the fire ''long'' before they actually did, and that was being fixed as of time of writing, but that didn't make the lack of response from the security guards any less problematic; said lack of response is treated as a Failsafe Failure in its own right. |
| 14 | -->"When automation fails, you are always supposed to be able to depend on those who are on-site with their boots on the ground. \ |
| 15 | \ |
| 16 | Not this time." |
| 17 | * FeelingOppressedByTheirExistence: |
| 18 | ** Seems to be the logic behind [[http://notalwaysright.com/someones-having-a-beef-part-2 this vegan worker]] throwing out everyone else's lunches for not being vegan, telling the submitter to never wear their leather jacket around her again, and ''demanding'' that the director throw out her leather purse, then ''trying to do it herself''. (This last one gets her fired before her first day is over.) |
| 19 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/dont-lose-your-headphones-over-it This coworker]] ''really'' doesn't take well to [[FelonyMisdemeanor the submitter wearing headphones]], even if it's the only way he can actually concentrate on his work with everyone else always shouting. She complains about his music disrupting her despite the fact he didn't bring his music with him that day, and rather than admit he's not actually bothering her in any way, she then accuses him of listening to music over the Internet and wasting the company's bandwidth — [[ConvictionByCounterfactualClue even though the entire building's Internet connection had been down for two hours at that point]], meaning that even if the submitter ''were'' listening to music, it wouldn't have been distracting because she does her work online. |
| 20 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/bi-coworker/215750/ This coworker's]] attitude to [[WesternAnimation/Frozen2013 a snow-themed Disney movie]] daring to star [[Creator/JonathanGroff a gay actor]]. "Why do [gay people] want to ruin everything by being in it?" |
| 21 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/breathe-a-little-easier-now/126142/ This co-worker]] complains to the manager about the submitter ''breathing''. It would later turn out that the co-worker was under the effects of alcohol ''and'' drugs. |
| 22 | * FelonyMisdemeanor: [[https://notalwaysright.com/putting-the-a-in-aspirin/265439/ This coworker]] throws a screaming fit when the submitter drinks soluble aspirin instead of gargling it and gets frustrated when nobody else in the workplace is bothered by it. |
| 23 | * FirstWorldProblems: [[http://notalwaysright.com/growing-up-resourceful-is-priceless This woman]] goes on about having manicures every three weeks, despite them costing $80 each time. |
| 24 | --> ''"I've had to cut back on some other stuff, though. This economy and all. I've cut my maid service down to every 3 weeks instead of every 2, I cancelled my membership to the tanning salon, and I even downgraded my membership at the fitness center."'' |
| 25 | * FoodAsBribe: [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-thick-slice-of-bribery It works]] in getting employees to work overtime when the promise of extra money fails. |
| 26 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/putting-the-treat-into-entreat/64483/ And sometimes, it works on more than humans.]] |
| 27 | * AFoolAndHisNewMoneyAreSoonParted: [[http://notalwaysright.com/saving-us-from-ourselves This employer]] seems never to have learned how to save money properly. Small wonder the potential employee simply walked out without filling out an application. |
| 28 | * ForInconveniencePressOne: A few cases. |
| 29 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/taking-the-urgency-out-of-emergency Here's why]] using this trope for emergency services is a bad idea. At the very least, if you're going to use an automated system for emergency services, make sure it ''works'' properly. |
| 30 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/thats-ducking-brilliant This oddball option]] in a phone menu (sadly, it doesn't exist nowadays). |
| 31 | * FreudianSlip: [[http://notalwaysright.com/greeting-perverted-disaster-averted "Hi, welcome to [store]. How can I lie to you today?"]] |
| 32 | * FromBadToWorse: |
| 33 | ** Could practically be the subtitle for [[https://notalwaysright.com/the-epic-of-the-impossible-store/172885/ this story]] as the submitter and their coworkers uncover more and more ways the previous store manager had been screwing over customers, their own employees, and the company. |
| 34 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/if-our-math-is-right-thats-so-not-worth-it-dollars-an-hour/293156/ This job interview]] for the role of 'Operations Manager'. It starts 45 minutes late, during which time the applicant notices that everybody in the office looks miserable. The interview itself kicks off with some illegal personal questions, which lead into the interviewer stating that they won't hire anyone with children, before leading into the big turnoffs, that of an expected 100-hour work week and 'correcting' the job listing's salary down from $52,000 to $22,000. After the interview, as a condition on being hired, the hiring manager wants the applicant to not only sign a contract promising the aforementioned 100-hour work week and sleeping in the office if required, but also ''write a three page essay on "how awesome it would be to work [there]"'', seemingly under the assumption that the applicant is so desperate for a job they'll do anything. [[WrongGenreSavvy The applicant runs for the hills.]] |
| 35 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/not-exactly-your-average-joe/321491/ This story]] has the submitter taking over after another IT temp worker called "Joe," [[VillainWithGoodPublicity who is missed by the other workers, only for it to turn out that he had skeleton after skeleton in his closet]]. To begin with, the submitter discovers that Joe was stealing computers from the office by telling the other workers they were broken and had to be replaced. Then the submitter discovers a computer at work that Joe was unable to take with him and finds out Joe was using it as a digital PornStash. Then Joe, being unable to hack it elsewhere, tries to get his old position back, and on finding the submitter has it, tries pestering the submitter to quit, only to be told to back off by the temp agency. Joe ignores this and gets the police sicced on him, which in turn leads to the revelation that Joe was a suspected drug dealer, and the computer with the porn turns out to also contain evidence of this. By the end of the story, ''the FBI'' has confiscated the computer as evidence and Joe is serving a five-year prison sentence. |
| 36 | * TheFunInFuneral: Used verbatim in the title of [[https://notalwaysright.com/putting-the-fun-into-funeral-3/60672/ this story]] because a coworker accidentally told someone who'd be missing work for a funeral to "have fun". |
| 37 | [[/folder]] |
| 38 | |
| 39 | [[folder:G]] |
| 40 | * TheGadfly: |
| 41 | ** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/drive-away-the-scammers Our manager has given us permission to prank any scam calls or telemarketers.]]" |
| 42 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/just-came-up-with-it-from-scratch "This is what happens when you talk back to your manager!"]] |
| 43 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/whiplash-comeback “I would never do that. Although I could probably break someone’s neck by hitting them at just the right point...”]] |
| 44 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/their-custom-is-sai-gone This customer]] has a racist worker assemble two sub sandwiches... and then "decides" not to buy them. |
| 45 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/stuck-in-a-silly-landline Another employee messing with a telemarketer]]. Apparently, this telemarketer thought the prank was ActuallyPrettyFunny. |
| 46 | * {{Gasshole}}: [[https://notalwaysright.com/an-immature-way-to-deal-with-an-immature-guy/178860/ A perfectly timed example]]. |
| 47 | * GenderBlenderName: The submitter of [[https://notalwaysright.com/how-else-can-i-tell-you-that-i-am-me/254096/ this story]] has one, confusing the salesman trying to call "him" about a quote. |
| 48 | * GenreSavvy: |
| 49 | ** ''NAW'' is newer than ''NAR'', but by February 2013, some workers had become aware that their actions (or the actions of their coworkers) might end up on the site. See "[[http://notalwaysright.com/some-bosses-are-more-memorable-than-others Some Bosses Are More Memorable Than Others]]." |
| 50 | ** Also like Not Always Right, some workers are aware when they do something silly, like [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-trouble-with-doubles here]]. |
| 51 | * GetOut: [[https://notalwaysright.com/mess-with-the-teeth-and-itll-bite-you-in-the-butt/258798/ A supervisor's final two words]] to an employee being fired for grossly unprofessional conduct when trying to "correct" a payroll error by blatantly swearing at the OP while OP was on the phone with the supervisor. |
| 52 | * GettingSickDeliberately: In a country that is now dealing with the UsefulNotes/COVID19Pandemic by making getting vaccinated or recovering from the disease the only ways to get a pass, [[https://notalwaysright.com/its-worth-a-shot/252161/ a vaccine-averse coworker of the poster]] is considering deliberately getting the disease. Since that same coworker apparently doesn't understand that ''all'' strains of the disease have a chance of resulting in a serious case, he's also seeking a "mild strain" that will be enough to kick off antibody production. The punchline of the story is that only making people mildly sick, while kicking off antibody production at the same time, is the vaccine's ''entire job description''. |
| 53 | * GirlOnGirlIsHot: [[http://notalwaysright.com/i-kissed-a-girl-and-i-dont-care-if-you-liked-it "Girls are supposed to kiss]] when there are guys around, because it’s hot and girls HAVE to act hot for guys!" |
| 54 | * GladIThoughtOfIt: [[https://notalwaysright.com/the-watermark-of-a-good-boss/118903/ Inverted here]] by a boss who is fishing for a compliment. |
| 55 | * GlobalIgnorance: [[https://notalwaysright.com/russian-right-over-to-the-globe-store/222676/ This bank's fraud department]] freezes a card despite a travel advisory in Russia because it was used in Moscow... ''the capital of Russia''. |
| 56 | * GoodNewsBadNews: [[http://notalwaysright.com/someone-is-about-to-be-fired This boss]] gets a call from one of his employees, who has good news and bad news. The good news is, the fire's out. |
| 57 | * GoneHorriblyRight: |
| 58 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/got-them-by-hook-or-by-crook A new engineer at a company]] is sent on a [[SnipeHunt joke errand]] to pick up "skyhooks". Turns out, that's the name of a real and ''very'' expensive piece of equipment [[note]] Although the story states that skyhooks are for a conveyor, the term apparently has multiple definitions, one of which is a type of crane.[[/note]] [[AnAesop That company no longer hazes new employees by sending them on joke errands.]] |
| 59 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/recipes-frozen-place/99814/ This vegan bakery]] prides themselves on the hardness of their cookies, even rejecting an alternative recipe for making the cookies too soft. They eventually get sued when someone bites into a cookie and breaks a tooth. |
| 60 | ** After an extensive campaign of spontaneously sending apparent third-party emails to test their employees' ability to recognize and discard spam or info phishing emails, [[https://notalwaysright.com/the-worst-kind-of-clickbait/235750/ this company]] registers for a third-party review service without notifying the employees. When they receive emails from the unfamiliar service, the employees dutifully add them to the spam filter. |
| 61 | * GrammarCorrectionGag: |
| 62 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/cant-quit-good-grammar This woman]] corrects a poorly-written comment from her manager. |
| 63 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/doctored-doctor-note/62115/ This employee]] has made a habit of calling out sick, to the point where their boss (the submitter) demands a doctor's note the next time they come in to prove their "illness". The next day the employee brings a hastily typed up doctor's note, listing a claim of "‘traumitic’ illness of the ‘lunges’". The unamused submitter immediately calls out the misspelled "lunges", but does not mention the also misspelled "traumitic". |
| 64 | * GretzkyHasTheBall: "[[http://notalwaysright.com/breaking-bank I had forgotten because]] I was thinking about the Rugby football match this weekend between the [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blues_%28Super_Rugby%29 Blues]] and the [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_Zealand_Warriors Warriors]], sir."[[note]]For those in the U.S., this is rather like saying you were thinking about the football match in Chicago between the [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chicago_Bears Bears]] and the [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chicago_Fire_SC Fire]]. The former team is an UsefulNotes/AmericanFootball squad, while the latter is an UsefulNotes/AssociationFootball squad, or "soccer" as it's called in the States.[[/note]] |
| 65 | * GruesomeGrandparent: [[https://notalwaysright.com/taking-both-the-mourning-and-graveyard-shift/ This boss's]] grandmother was clearly not kind to him, as he admits that the last time he saw her, she sicced a pit bull on him and she convinced him that everyone else dislikes their grandparents just as much. This ends up making him look horrible when he yells at an employee for missing work due to attending her grandmother's funeral, unaware that said employee and her grandmother utterly adored each other. |
| 66 | * TheGuardsMustBeCrazy: [[https://notalwaysright.com/no-one-has-ever-felt-so-safe/253276/ This NAR/NAW crosspost]] has a woman yell ''very'' racist things at black hospital workers and ''loudly'' threaten to run them over with her truck. Security "casually" escorts her from the premises, and does nothing else. They ''say'' they'll call the cops, but they never do. |
| 67 | [[/folder]] |
| 68 | |
| 69 | [[folder:H]] |
| 70 | * HarsherInHindsight: InUniverse, [[https://notalwaysright.com/real-life-bus-ts-up-your-analogies/323601/ these employees]] stopped using the term [[https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bus_factor "bus number"]] after one of their workers was actually hit by a bus. |
| 71 | * HateSink: [[https://notalwaysright.com/how-do-these-people-keep-getting-hired-part-3/275765/ This manager]] is referred to as "Captain Evil," and seems to be every MeanBoss from ''Not Always Working'' rolled into one. Among her rap sheet is [[LongList bigotry, sexual harassment, fraud, firing people for being chronically ill, trans, or non-binary, overworking her subordinates, losing clients due to her incompetence and dishonesty, blaming the submitter for everything wrong, and infidelity]]. |
| 72 | * HaveAGayOldTime: Mentioned by name in the title of [[https://notalwaysright.com/having-a-gay-old-time-2/226871/ this story]] in which OP is supposed to meet with an employee named Gay, and when someone comes to get him, asks them if they're Gay. The employee mistakenly assumes they have been MistakenForGay (or perhaps outed, their sexual orientation is never specified) when OP really just wants to know if they've found the person they're supposed to meet. |
| 73 | * HeadDesk: [[http://notalwaysright.com/their-mind-is-blank-cheque The conclusion of this story]]. |
| 74 | * HeKnowsTooMuch: The motivation behind [[http://notalwaysright.com/back-off-if-you-want-your-backups this person]] being let go by the company. [[PointyHairedBoss The boss]] isn't particularly smart about the way he handled the situation, though -- for starters, assuming that having the ''ability'' to do damage to the company automatically means having the ''willingness'' to go through with it, and responding by punishing the employee for having that ability in the first case, thus giving the employee as many reasons to go through with it as possible. |
| 75 | * HenpeckedHusband: When a worker's supervisor calls the worker's house to ask where he is, [[https://notalwaysright.com/were-guessing-he-works-a-lot-of-overtime/263171/ his wife]] screams at and cusses out the supervisor for bugging her. When the worker is informed about the call, he [[ThisIsGonnaSuck is horrified for what's waiting for him when he gets home]]. The submitter expresses hope that the worker left his wife. |
| 76 | * HeroicBSOD: |
| 77 | ** In [[https://notalwaysright.com/the-guest-that-unwittingly-broke-a-boomers-brain/307849/ this story,]] the manager - who is noted as not being at all bigoted - has a minor mental breakdown when one of his employees has to spell out that the difference [[FailedASpotCheck he can't work out]] about a regular guest is that the guest has gone through a gender transition since their last visit, and has to subsequently be repeatedly corrected by the employee when he can't wrap his mind around the change. To his credit, he has a JerkassRealization when he gets home and counts himself very lucky that he didn't have his breakdown within earshot of the guest. |
| 78 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/the-guidebook-is-not-a-substitute-for-your-brain/329329/ This new hire]] read the part in the employee handbook about a driver's license being the best example of ID for restricted purchases and obediently blanked out on any other acceptable form of ID, a problem when he comes to a customer who is blind and doesn't have a driving license. He goes into a BSOD when a correction is given to him by his training supervisor, still doesn't get it, and is noted to not last much longer afterwards. |
| 79 | * HighTurnoverRate: A number of stories have jobs where [[MeanBoss malicious]], [[PointyHairedBoss incompetent]], or [[BadBoss outright dangerous]] management means that no one stays at the job for long. |
| 80 | * HistoricalLongevityJoke: While not the focus of [[https://notalwaysright.com/burned-fingers-and-old-flames/319058/ this story]], the submitter mentally makes such a joke about the elderly nurse who led his treatment once he finally received it, saying she probably treated Odin after he sacrificed his eye. |
| 81 | * HoistByHisOwnPetard: |
| 82 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/thats-what-he-gets-for-being-a-pig A Jewish coworker]] who steals the submitter's lunch without asking gets his comeuppance when he ignores her warning that the food he just stole and ate from her contains pork. Since then, he no longer steals her lunch. |
| 83 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/acting-like-a-complete-jerky A female coworker]] who expects free food to be given to her gets a nasty surprise when she steals and eats one worker's jerky and learns too late that it's very spicy. |
| 84 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-great-scam-of-09 This telemarketer selling warranties for car parts]] refuses to reveal which car of the submitter's is supposedly about to lose its warranty, by claiming "security purposes".[[note]]The real reason being that the telemarketer was trying to make it ''sound'' like the submitter had done business with her company before, and also probably because they didn't have a clue what car it was in the first place[[/note]] The submitter, being GenreSavvy, forces the conversation into an endless loop by telling her that he can't help her because of security purposes, until the telemarketer gives up. |
| 85 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/married-to-the-idiotic-idea This boss]] promotes a new employee who is married rather than the single experienced employee because she believes [[AggressiveCategorism married employees are more responsible than single employees]]. The boss later got fired after she got a divorce. |
| 86 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/engineered-a-solution/62549/ This worker]] greedily demands to be paid at a higher rate, "or I quit". [[DidntThinkThisThrough The boss and coworkers accept his resignation at face value]]. |
| 87 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/taking-stock-harassment-claims/97823/ This incompetent worker's]] plan to get his supervisor fired for sexual harassment that never happened goes through smoothly... until [[AwakenTheSleepingGiant HR investigates the claim]] and discovers from [=CCTV=] footage that it was bogus. Both the worker and his father (the manager who fired the supervisor) are subsequently fired for lying to HR. |
| 88 | ** A classic example [[https://notalwaysright.com/be-a-sore-winner-and-lose-your-position/135840/ here]]. When a rival store who won the competition accuses the submitter's store of cheating, an investigation reveals that ''[[RevealingCoverUp the rival store was the one cheating]]''. |
| 89 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/a-blizzard-of-karma/234558/ A sports bar owner]] demands that her staff come in for a staff meeting in the middle of a ''major snowstorm'', threatening to fire anyone who doesn't attend. First the manager (the submitter) quits when the owner attempts to write them up for being ''less than a minute late'' and questioning her authority. Then, when the owner makes good on her threat and fires the fifteen people who didn't show up, the cook questions her and gets fired as well, leaving the bar with insufficient staff to open. Then those who were fired win a lawsuit against her for unlawful dismissal, and [[HumiliationConga on top of that]] the cook points out that nobody got paid to attend the meeting, [[SummonBiggerFish which gets the Department of Labor interested.]] As a result, the bar closes permanently, and as the submitter heard it, the owner is forced to sell possessions and leave her house to cover all the legal fees and fines. |
| 90 | ** In an attempt to stiff the submitter on a redundancy payout (in the hope they'd put in their own notice of resignation), [[https://notalwaysright.com/thats-the-way-the-coo-crumbles/267612/ this company]] forgets to give them notice of redundancy until the last day, resulting in them having to pay the submitter an additional month's wages after they leave. |
| 91 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/you-have-no-power-here-section-head-the-rude/283398/ The head of a small department]] complains that IT took too long to get their system back up after a power failure, when IT had many more higher priority systems to work on first. The only problem? While previously IT Support was public sector, it had recently become private sector. All the complaint does is alert the higher-ups that the department is still receiving free support. In their attempt to have a power trip over IT, they managed to turn a free service into a six-figure annual payment. |
| 92 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/actions-have-consequences-aint-that-neat/290877/ A new manager]] decides to have a power trip over his new employees, calling them all in for an 8am meeting (that ends up just being essentially the manager patting himself on the back for nine hours about the work he did at his last job). All his employees... who live all over the state, and who proceed to rack up a $6,000 budget hole in the form of overtime and food/travel/habitation expenses in order to attend. The manager only lasts six months before going back to his old job. |
| 93 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/they-had-a-good-run-but-they-forked-it-up/323604/ A human resources employee]] is running a scheme with a relative of theirs and two other people to let them collect wages for doing no work in a warehouse, by clocking in and out but disappearing for the rest of the shift in the general bustle of the shift change. They get away for this for over two years... until the relative when running late for the clock-in bypasses a safety rope, gets brushed by a forklift, and insists on a safety report, the resulting investigation of which unravels the whole thing. |
| 94 | ** The submitter of [[https://notalwaysright.com/their-goose-is-totally-cooked/323977/ this story]] starts writing restaurant recipes in a "pseudo-cookbook" to make their job easier, which other chefs begin using. Eventually, the submitter's book becomes the restaurant's ''de facto'' official recipe book. Once the submitter becomes qualified to be a chef, management decides they don't want to pay the extra expense for them, and contrives an excuse to fire them. The submitter responds by taking their pseudo-cookbook with them as they move to a better-paying job at another restaurant. Without the submitter's book, the first restaurant's food quality declines, leading to complaints, a haemorrhaging of customers to the submitter's new restaurant, investors getting scared away, and eventually the majority of the kitchen staff quitting. Management at the old restaurant tries begging the submitter to come back to no avail. |
| 95 | * HolierThanThou: [[https://notalwaysright.com/should-have-ignored-the-biblical-signs/119521/ This night manager]] uses Bible verses to justify his very incorrect and jerkish actions. This act gets him fired when he steals from the store under the belief that he shouldn't follow Man's Law since he follows God's Laws. |
| 96 | * HollywoodVoodoo: [[https://notalwaysright.com/hogwarts-school-of-journalism/64852/ At least one woman]] out there has claimed to have been cursed by a Haitian witch on her job application. |
| 97 | * HonestJohnsDealership: Either [[http://notalwaysright.com/how-to-drive-customers-away this guy]] doesn't know how to do his job, or he's a scammer. |
| 98 | * HugeGuyTinyGirl: She really does need the [[http://notalwaysright.com/its-taking-extra-long-for-this-clerk-to-figure-it-out extra-long bed]]. |
| 99 | * HumiliationConga: |
| 100 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/got-to-face-the-facebook-facts One boy]] who uses the computer in his school pool's office to sext with his girlfriend on Facebook, being 45 minutes late for his lifeguard shift as a result, gets one when he's found out. |
| 101 | -->''(...when our boss returned he was fired. It gets better: he was expelled for using the school’s computers for “illicit activities.” Then his girlfriend dumped him. [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking Then his mother made him come and apologize!]])'' |
| 102 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/watching-career-just-flutter/102907/ This apprentice tattoo artist]] intentionally ruins a client's tattoo because he thinks that [[EntitledBastard he's above doing silly butterfly tattoos]] and that he should be able to do whatever he wants. The aftermath? The submitter, who owns the shop, fires him and spreads word of the incident to ''every tattoo parlor in the city'', essentially making the former apprentice a PersonaNonGrata in the industry. Then charges are pressed against him after he throws a tantrum. To top it all off, the client he essentially mutilated sues him, and ''wins''. |
| 103 | * HurricaneOfPuns: [[http://notalwaysright.com/too-many-pun-settias With a flower theme.]] |
| 104 | * HypocriticalHumor: |
| 105 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/do-as-i-say-not-as-a-drink This manager]] castigates an employee for having water at their register (which ''isn't'' against the rules), then leaves with her own stash of soda and food (which ''is''). |
| 106 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-always-working-can-lead-to-not-ever-working An example]] involving someone refusing to do their job while reading the site itself. |
| 107 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/double-talk Two preachy identical twins bug an atheist.]] Turns out at least [[HonestJohnsDealership one of the twins]] doesn't practice what he preaches. |
| 108 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/needs-a-punch-of-punctuation This cashier]] accuses the submitter and her daughter of being {{Grammar Nazi}}s by giving them grief over their choice of words in trying to order popcorn. |
| 109 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/traffic-excuses-are-a-two-way-street This manager]] chews out his employees for being late, even though they were held up by construction. When the manager's boss points out that the manager was late too, the manager says that he shouldn't be accountable for that, because there was traffic. |
| 110 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/his-point-is-entmoot “What you are is geeks.”]] “Says the man who did not ask me to explain the reference.” |
| 111 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/varying-degrees-of-understanding A regional store manager]] wonders why a local manager is leaving. When an employee tries to explain using the regional manager's daughter as an example, saying that there is no way either of them went to college to work at a dead-end job, the regional manager says that their daughter wouldn't stand for that job, but still doesn't understand why the local manager wouldn't stand for it either. |
| 112 | *** The exact same (lack of) logic is demonstrated by [[http://notalwaysright.com/worried-about-being-put-to-bed-with-a-shovel this boss]]. Parking lot needs its snow shoveled, but there's a sketchy-looking man rooting through their trash nearby. When asked if he would let his fifteen-year-old daughter shovel snow by herself in this situation, the boss says "of course not". A fifteen-year-old employee wanting someone else to help her just in case, though? She's just being lazy for no reason! |
| 113 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/customer-service-is-not-at-your-service "My boyfriend and I had a good laugh]] about being ignored repeatedly by a man explaining how important good customer service is." |
| 114 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/sisterhood-of-the-judgmental-rants A cashier]] gives a mother and her baby daughter a hard time because she's under the WIC program, until the cashier's twin sister points out how she had a son during high school and had to have their parents help her out temporarily. |
| 115 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/ki-wheezing This cashier]] accuses a customer of lying to get something for free, going so far as to try to guilt-trip her with "Jesus is watching you lie", when the whole reason the customer is asking for a replacement in the first place is because the cashier lied about there not being any kiwi or kiwi flavoring in their smoothie. Between this and literally telling the customer to "fuck off", [[LaserGuidedKarma she isn't a cashier anymore by story's end]]. |
| 116 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-my-cup-of-tea This barista]] puts a small cappuccino in a medium cup despite the submitter asking him to put it in a small cup, cannot for the life of him understand what the submitter is talking about when they ask to move it to a small cup... and then, when the submitter reaches behind the counter to grab a small cup and pour the cappuccino into it themselves, has the gall to call ''them'' an idiot. [[LaserGuidedKarma The next customer in line loudly asks for someone else to serve them in response]], and the submitter has since then only ever seen that worker cleaning tables, never behind the counter. |
| 117 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/irony-going-smoke/101906/ This coworker]] "doesn't believe" in getting fireworks for a holiday because it's just setting money on fire and watching it go up in smoke. The poster points out that the coworker in question is a pack-a-day smoker. |
| 118 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/putting-the-tender-into-bartender/142558/ This bartender]] adamantly refuses to serve patrons who are under the age of 25, even though the bartender himself is only ''15'' and has implied to have had drinks himself[[note]]Which, as the submitter notes, are both highly illegal in the UK (where the story takes place), as the minimum age to serve alcohol there is 16, while the drinking age is 18[[/note]]. |
| 119 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/doesnt-mean-as-much-to-them/145962/ This employee]] ribs on another employee for not understanding a quote from ''Film/MeanGirls''... only to almost immediately afterward stare blankly in confusion at a customer who also quotes the movie. |
| 120 | [[/folder]] |
| 121 | |
| 122 | [[folder:I]] |
| 123 | * IAmSpartacus: After a male coworker is ordered to put on a beard net for his stubble, the female submitter argues that her eyebrow hairs are just as likely to fall into the food, and they're not requiring one of ''her'', so the coworker should be fine. [[https://notalwaysright.com/got-him-out-of-a-hairy-situation/232837/ Management insists, so the female worker also puts on a beard net, causing customers to ridicule the management for requiring a woman and a man with no beard to wear beard nets]]. |
| 124 | * ICantHearYou: [[{{Pun}} Sounds]] like [[http://notalwaysright.com/just-grit-and-bear-it this employee]] has a hearing problem. |
| 125 | * IHaveToGoIronMyDog: |
| 126 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/all-sales-are-irrational This cashier]] feigns excuses for not wanting to do a refund, including "maybe it's got a corset type style" (which it doesn't) and "the computer isn't working" while blatantly messing around with the POS. This then leads to "I can’t give you a refund because the IT guy is driving," after which [[BlatantLies the computer miraculously starts working again]] to service the next customers in line. |
| 127 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/getting-mugged This customer]] encounters this trope too: after bringing a travel coffee mug into a store, they are asked to leave it with the worker so that it doesn't spill on the clothing. When the customer asks for their cup back, the worker pretends to believe that they're asking whether the store sells coffee, denies knowledge of said cup, then awkwardly says "I have to go see something" after the customer points out that the cup is right behind them. |
| 128 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/just-lost-their-chemistry This manager]] is helping a "skinny blonde girl" open her account. After realizing that the girl is majoring in chemistry and physics, the manager says, “I didn’t expect you to say that. I expected [[StayInTheKitchen something fluffy like interior decorating or fashion design]]. If you could excuse me for a second, I, uh, need to go get something from the back." Another manager takes over for her. |
| 129 | * IKnowMortalKombat: |
| 130 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/hasnt-found-his-calling-of-duty This guy]] seems to think he would do great in the army because he plays a lot of ''VideoGame/CallOfDuty''. |
| 131 | -->"[[ComicallyMissingThePoint Except when I play online; I get ganked a lot online.]]" |
| 132 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/thinking-outside-the-boxes This guy]] is more fortunate, as his childhood ''VideoGame/{{Tetris}}'' skills end up getting put to good use in quickly restocking a store. |
| 133 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/seizing-up-at-the-facts/176705/ This security guard]] seems to think watching medical dramas makes him a medical expert and [[KnowNothingKnowItAll more knowledgeable of medical conditions than actual medical experts and people who have those conditions]], clearly not realizing that the RuleOfDrama [[ArtisticLicenseMedicine tends to take priority over accurate information]]. |
| 134 | * INeedAFreakingDrink: [[http://notalwaysright.com/retail-workers-never-get-away-scotch-free "Look, I'm in my late sixties and I work in retail.]] Right about now, I'd say alcohol is the least of my concerns. Now hit me, barkeep!" |
| 135 | * INeverSaidItWasPoison: In [[https://notalwaysright.com/cant-clean-hands-crime/101424/ this]] story, the submitter and her friend notice that money keeps disappearing from their houses after their cleaner visits. When the friend's husband catches the cleaner stealing, the submitter confronts her about it, which she denies doing, but she offers to give her half of what was stolen, which amounts to $65. The submitter states that she never said how much was missing. [[LaserGuidedKarma The cleaner is promptly fired.]] |
| 136 | * IllTakeTwoBeersToo: [[http://notalwaysright.com/to-the-fourth-power This waiter]] assumes the trope is in effect, when it's actually a case of one person ordering for all. |
| 137 | * ImAHumanitarian: [[http://notalwaysright.com/some-questions-eat-at-you How do you fillet a person?]] |
| 138 | * ImplausibleDeniability: [[http://notalwaysright.com/in-an-email-dominated-society This company rep]] tries to excuse being beyond useless at helping a customer by telling them said company does not have email. To repeat: they try to tell the customer that ''an international provider of telecommunications'', which had ''already sent that customer multiple emails, '''does not have inter-office email'''''. |
| 139 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/comes-into-work-and-phones-it-in/117617/ This coworker]] not only denies stealing the OP’s phone when said phone is in his hand, but goes so far as to claim that OP framed him when she proves it’s her phone. |
| 140 | * ImprobablyPredictable: A former telemarketer encounters another telemarketer [[http://notalwaysright.com/my-mime-self-and-i working from the same script]] he used at his old job. So he joins in. |
| 141 | * IncompetenceInc: |
| 142 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/the-epic-of-the-impossible-store/172885/ This story]],[[note]]identical to [[https://www.reddit.com/r/TalesFromRetail/comments/1un3r8/worst_case_scenario/ a story on Reddit]] for one reason or another[[/note]] to make a ''very'' long story short, involves a group of retail store managers visiting a store that was completely run into the ground by a store manager who'd slacked off and stolen from the store, before quitting just before the new regional manager came in to check on her. She leaves behind (for the visiting managers to deal with) a filthy disaster area of a grocery store full of trash, months-old build-up of gunk, unboxed merchandise left in odd places, and employees who do not actually know how to do their jobs in ways that aren't how the manager did things, some resisting attempts to learn how to do their jobs the right way (e.g. no taking extra breaks during lulls in the day, always taking out the garbage to the dumpster instead of the Trash Room) to the point of getting in fights with the visiting managers and/or quitting. It's telling that amongst ''NAW'' commenters, the word "Trash Room" has become a euphemism for businesses that embody this trope. |
| 143 | ** For a more localized example, the upper management of [[https://notalwaysright.com/why-do-we-even-have-that-team/199708/ this bank]] tried to outsource their confirms department to India, getting a team that was probably ''the'' most unprofessional group of workers possible - highlights include leaving for lunch in the middle of training, never using the bank's system, ignoring work orders unless they came specifically from the London office, making an incredible amount of errors and refusing to fix them, not answering the phones because everyone in the office went on break without warning, blowing off customers on the phone for personal conversations, swearing in Hindi and English to [[BilingualBackfire people who spoke both languages]], regularly making serious breaches of regulation by sending transaction lists to ''every'' counterparty, and generally being so awful that customers thought [[PoesLaw they were scammers impersonating the bank]]. Eventually, the status quo settles down as follows: The original confirms department receives all requests, forwards them to India, and then does the work themselves as before, immediately deleting the Indian office's response when it inevitably comes in a week late and problem-riddled - which means management sees the Indian office as a success, since as far as they can see their responses are no longer coming in more than a week late. Fittingly enough, the story is entitled '[[WesternAnimation/TheEmperorsNewGroove Why do we even HAVE that team?]]' |
| 144 | ** The submitter's boyfriend seems to be the OnlySaneMan at [[https://notalwaysright.com/shocking-what-happens-you-overwork-your-best-employees/281587/ this burger restaurant,]] where most of the 'employees' are [[{{Nepotism}} kids and friends of the owners]] and the only other adult employee 'called out sick' when they actually just got stoned and forgot they were working that night. When the owner attempts to punish the boyfriend for not picking up that shift (it was their first day off for over a month, following three weeks straight of overtime) [[TakeThisJobAndShoveIt they quit.]] When customers start asking where he went, the owners attempt to excuse this by claiming they had to fire him for stealing from them - [[LaserGuidedKarma only to be forced to close four months later]] when the person they hired to replace him actually ''did'' rob them blind, including stealing the owners' car. |
| 145 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/more-dropped-balls-than-times-square/286636/ A fast food worker]] agrees to come in on their day off because the restaurant needs help. The help in question is required because nearly two full shifts failed to go to work because they were hung over, including the opening manager. After doing a once-over with the frazzled evening shift manager, during which ''none'' of the other workers come in, the eventual conclusion is that two people is not enough to make actually opening the restaurant that evening worth it (since they'd missed the opening and lunch rushes, and it would take so long for just the two of them to get stuff ready they'd miss the evening rush too). Subsequently almost the entire staff is fired and replaced. |
| 146 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/theyre-not-kidding-when-they-say-worst-service-ever/290503/ This restaurant]] is another example. It gets to the point where the submitter is told the steak they ordered has been 86'd because the kitchen staff was unable to make it properly – after ''three attempts''. And then the staff loses the submitter's ticket, causing them and their girlfriend to [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere give up and find somewhere else]]. |
| 147 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/tying-up-every-door-with-red-tape/292447/ This bank's]] response to communication issues in their contract loans department, caused by them physically moving the more senior employees into separate offices, is to hire another layer of middlemen, and then to do that ''again'' when they open more offices for the managers and bump everybody up a level to fill the space. From its original setup of managers and floor workers working in the same area, it reaches the point where in order to refer a question to a manager a floor worker needs to talk to an associate on the floor, who talks to a controller in the closed offices on the floor, who talks to a team leader on the executive floor above, who talks to a supervisor in the executive building across town, [[OverlyLongGag who talks to the manager in the executive suite in the executive building across town.]] The only thing that stops this from getting any worse is the 2008 financial crash, which causes all of the floor workers to become redundant (but, as the submitter notes, as far as they're aware all of the more senior levels retained their jobs being middlemen for a department that no longer existed). |
| 148 | ** In [[https://notalwaysright.com/congratulations-you-shot-yourself-right-in-the-foot/265257/ this story]],[[note]]also identical to [[https://www.reddit.com/r/talesfromtechsupport/comments/q9wx58/lets_relocate_our_entire_it_department_to_a_new/ a Reddit post]][[/note]] an ISP is taken over by an owner who [[CorruptCorporateExecutive only bought it just to muck around with the company so he could resell it at a profit]], and launches a relocation to a new business park that no one wants to commute to. This loses the company most of its tech support staff, and their replacements are hired [[InsaneTrollLogic based on drawing exercises to determine their "passion" for the job]], and are utterly incompetent. It gets to the point where the accounting department essentially does the tech support department's jobs. Then they utterly botch their creation of a tech support website that buries a much-needed phone number deep in the site, and charges the company for every click. By the time the story has ended, the company's reputation has gone from one of the top [=ISPs=] in the country to so bad that when the owner ''does'' sell the company brand to a competitor, the brand is so tarnished that it can't be used. |
| 149 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/game-over-for-this-store This video game store]] slowly gets driven into the ground by a series of decisions that cut off the store's income streams one by one – including ''not selling new games'' – [[InsaneTrollLogic in the belief it will increase turnover]]. |
| 150 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/if-they-can-be-petty-i-can-be-pettier/297742/ This pizzeria]] has [[PointyHairedBoss terrible managers]] who "keep hiring anyone with a pulse regardless of how many brain cells are between their ears", resulting in a HighTurnoverRate because these employees keep having to be fired. When this unsurprisingly results in staffing problems, the store manager alienates the one competent employee by cancelling time off for a spring break vacation in California that had been approved months ago, resulting in them, previously willing to put up with the incompetence because they're planning to move away for college soon, [[TakeThisJobAndShoveIt giving their two-week notice]]. |
| 151 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/even-the-doggos-are-struggling-in-these-weird-times/289943/ This dog grooming salon]] had recently been bought out, and apart from [[OnlySaneMan the submitter]], just about all the staff are rather apathetic. The groomer puts a dog that has bad matting into the tub ''after being told not to'' and does only the bare minimum amount to make it look like he's done a good job. The dog winds up going home with still quite a bit of matting despite the owner being charged full price with extra. And management [[CorruptCorporateExecutive doesn't care so long as they make money]]. |
| 152 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/goodbye-hotel-hell/307847/ This hotel]] has a severe staff shortage caused by the manager refusing to hire new staff, and the owner won't let the manager fire anyone because of the staff shortage, leading to it being a dumping ground for lazy employees who know they can't be fired. The submitter, who's supposed to only be a desk clerk, is on laundry and breakfast duty and has to clean any rooms that weren't cleaned either if housekeepers lied about cleaning a room or it led to the hotel being overbooked, leading to them having to spend their time off recovering from overworking. The hotel is also prone to do spectacularly incompetent things, to the point where the submitter remarks that the hotel staff "always [seems] to go out of their way to surprise [them] with new, exciting BS" whenever they think the incompetence has reached its limit.\ |
| 153 | The worst is the hotel [[https://notalwaysright.com/not-quite-the-wedding-night-she-envisioned/307840/ failing to register most reservations for a large wedding party]] even though the reservation was placed ''four months prior'' and double-booking one of the three rooms whose reservation ''was'' entered properly, resulting in the bride [[InterruptedIntimacy walking in on a gay couple having sex]]. This latest display of abject incompetence leads to the submitter [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere looking for a new job]], which they get almost immediately, and they don't give their two weeks' notice because anyone who does is immediately removed from the schedule, leading to the manager being blindsided when they quit. |
| 154 | ** Corporate at [[https://notalwaysright.com/mishandling-and-manhandling/193137/ this store]] is implied to be this. For starters, they put [[PointyHairedBoss a manager with only a month of retail experience who's only worked at a much smaller branch with very little customer interactions]] as a substitute manager at a much larger store. Not only does the new manager prove to be hopelessly out of her depth, but she throws an actual temper tantrum at an elderly customer with dementia before manhandling them out of the store – ''during an event in partnership with a dementia charity!'' Human Resources then completely botches their response to this incident by taking the new manager's side ''and'' making her substitute position permanent. It's only when half the staff prepares to ResignInProtest, the dementia charity moves their event elsewhere, and the store's reputation plummets that HR admits they made a mistake and the new manager agrees to leave. |
| 155 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/good-lord-we-hope-they-were-paid-well/261626/ This scrubs store]] is a train wreck of mismanagement (or more often than not, ''no'' management) during the 2008 recession. For starters, the store [[HighTurnoverRate has three managers in a row quit within days of each other]] after being accused of theft just as the submitter is being hired, meaning it takes a while for them to get into the system. After this, the store is left with four employees with no management, no idea what to do, no inventory, and an area manager who hardly ever shows up and can never be reached. The store literally can barely keep the lights on. Then the area manager gives them a fifth employee… who [[StealingFromTheTill Steals From the Till]] every day to pay for lunch until being caught and fired, though not before showing up to work one day with ''tuberculosis''. Then, ''finally'' the store is given a new manager… who turns out to be a {{Nepotism}} hire who then brings in ''more'' nepotism hires and forces the four existing workers to quit by giving them only four hours and telling them that they'd have to “work harder to earn the privilege of getting more hours.” |
| 156 | --->''I learned a lot of bitter lessons from that job.'' |
| 157 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/unable-to-own-up-to-ownership/157013/ This bar]] is overdue for [[Series/BarRescue a visit from Jon Taffer]]. When the submitter and her husband visit, they see a very drunk man be let in by the bouncer, who sees a bunch of equally drunk friends, who reveal that they bribed their way in. The submitter and her husband then find out that the pool table doesn't work, prompting the drunk guy to try and "help," throwing them a number of racist and ableist slurs along the way. When the submitter and her husband try to get the bouncer to throw the drunk out, he refuses. Then the waiter throws ''them'' out for "being disruptive" on instruction from the drunk guy, who turns out to be ''[[ScrewTheRulesIMakeThem the bar's owner]]''. |
| 158 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/crashing-and-burning-without-ever-leaving-the-ground/306183/ This department store]] botches up the training process for the submitter – a new hire at the store. First the department manager mistakes the new hire for a floater and reschedules the employee that was supposed to train them for another shift. Then when the submitter comes in, the department manager offers to train her… and then forgets about her and goes to a meeting, forcing the submitter to wait by a register telling customers that she can't help them. The confused submitter keeps coming back to the cash office lady, who calls someone called Betty, who tells them that they don't have enough people in the store, and as long as the department manager is busy, no one can help the submitter. By this point, [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere the submitter has decided she no longer wants to work there and resigns]]. |
| 159 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/customers-cruising-for-cashiers-encounter-only-crickets/323578/ This department store]] takes staffing problems to the extreme, as the submitter and other customers find no one manning the cash registers, and nobody on the floor either. [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere Eventually, they just throw their items in a pile and leave.]] |
| 160 | --->''The very worst customer service is not being there to take the customer’s money.'' |
| 161 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/y2killing-your-business/323586/ This company]] completely botches its preparation for [=Y2K=]. |
| 162 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/not-projected-good-afternoon/109322/ This theatre]] apparently has a fire in its projector room, destroying the film.[[note]]Though [[http://disq.us/p/1smgg8s one ex-projectionist commenter]] has suggested that the "fire" was a projector malfunction that melted the film, which emitted a lot of smoke, and was mishandled by staff.[[/note]] When the teenaged submitter and their friend run and fetch an employee, the employee is skeptical at first, thinking they're trying to sneak into a R-rated feature. Eventually, the lights in the theatre switch on, but no alarm is raised, and no announcement is made about whether to evacuate or if refunds will be issued. When the submitter and their friend ask another employee about a comped ticket to a showing of the same movie in another theatre, they are refused, with the employee apparently not even knowing about the 'fire.' When the submitter returned from college a couple years later, the theatre had gone out of business. |
| 163 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/to-say-this-is-infuriating-would-not-be-overselling-it/233360/ This hotel]] is ''massively'' oversold when the sales team books three big groups at the same time. And to make matters worse, sales also refuses to authorize the front desk to relocate any of the groups, telling them instead to relocate the "transient" (non-group-affiliated) guests, and are [[TheyJustDontGetIt unable to comprehend]] when the front desk tells them that there ''are'' no transient guests. Eventually, the submitter tells the sales lead that they have the option of either a) relocating Group #1, a regular group who was laid back and could be relocated without issue, or b) relocate the other two groups, which would be inconvenient, as both groups were there for a conference in the hotel, and would take more time. Naturally, the sales lead picks option B because Group #1 was her group, which results in a long, drawn-out, and painful process. And to make matters worse, not only did sales [[KarmaHoudini face no repercussions for this]], but [[HereWeGoAgain a month later, the hotel is oversold the exact same way]]. |
| 164 | * InnocentlyInsensitive: [[https://notalwaysright.com/at-this-office-if-you-cant-stand-the-heat-get-out-of-the-kitchen/138051/ A client at a new office]] mistakes the kitchen for the (overweight) submitter's office, and is rather embarrassed once she realizes what she said and implied. Luckily, the submitter [[ActuallyPrettyFunny is more amused than angry]]. |
| 165 | * InsaneTrollLogic: Far, ''far'' too many examples to list even ''close'' to exhaustively, but here goes: |
| 166 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/the-managers-logic-is-a-bit-spotty "...I really can't argue with that."]] |
| 167 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/really-gets-the-blood-pumping This nurse]] apparently thinks that being calm while donating blood means that the donor obviously has a sexual fetish for it. Both her fellow nurse and the donor are extremely confused. To compound the Insane Troll Logic, you would think you would ''want'' the person who likes to give blood to have every reason to do so! |
| 168 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/refunder-blunder-part-4 This cashier]] can't even keep a consistent excuse for refusing to take a return for more than thirty seconds. |
| 169 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/at-logon-heads This user]] wonders why IT is closing his support ticket after he basically refuses to let IT actually do anything to fix his problem. |
| 170 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/internal-affairs This boss]] tries to blame an ex-intern with whom she didn't get along for making an hours-long call on her home phone to Southeast Asia that resulted in a massive phone bill. [[SarcasmMode It was clearly just a coincidence]] that the boss's cleaning lady's temp replacement had family there, and had a phone that could receive but not make calls. |
| 171 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/game-over-for-this-store This boss]] basically cuts out every single source of income his store could possibly have, and then expects to make ''more'' sales than before. The situation is effectively a kind of DisasterDominoes: |
| 172 | *** He interdicts allowing free playing of anything because it tempts parents to leave kids there, and he doesn't want to be an ad hoc babysitter. This is somehow more important than the possibility of the kids (and other on-the-fence customers) deciding the games are worth buying. |
| 173 | *** After sales wind up falling to half because of this (and a good chunk of the work force is jettisoned), he ends the weekly game tournaments because he doesn't want to have to pay for more than one employee on the floor at a time, even though said tournaments bring in more money in 2 hours than the normal sales on any other day. It's worth noting that [[PointyHairedBoss he doesn't connect ending the free game tryouts with the business decline]]. |
| 174 | *** At the same time, he stops getting new releases, and interdicts trading old games for new, because he's apparently afraid that the new stuff is likely to just sit there. |
| 175 | *** Finally (after forbidding even ''bathroom breaks'' because, since he refuses to pay for more than one employee on the floor at a time, they'd require the store to be locked entirely for the duration), he stops console repairs because he thinks ordering the parts ahead of schedule is a risk of ''them'' just sitting around! In short, he effectively dismisses the value of ''any'' source of income besides people expressly looking to buy old games. No surprise that that one basket wasn't enough to keep the store afloat. |
| 176 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/fired-beyond-reason This store]] is constantly short on staff because the manager keeps firing people for no reason whatsoever. |
| 177 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/something-new-under-the-sun "The sun ISN’T some magic ball of life giving heat.]] The sun is the eye of a malevolent God. It gazes down upon us like a physical presence, weighing us down and making everything worse. It makes us cold in the winter, it makes us hot in the summer, it blinds us as we drive, and agitates the air around us making the air thicker and unpleasant.” |
| 178 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/all-she-sees-is-a-costumed-villain/62313/ This cashier]] at a thrift store seems to be under the belief that thrift stores are ''solely'' for poor people, accusing the submitter of "stealing" a fancy ball gown because she wants to use it for a costume. The manager that comes to help [[WhatWereYouThinking scolds the cashier for her nonexistent logic]] before checking the submitter out himself. The cashier ends up [[TheyJustDontGetIt continuing her inane activities]], and ends up [[LaserGuidedKarma getting fired for]] attempting to get a young boy arrested for wanting to buy a stuffed animal because he didn't look “poor” enough. |
| 179 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/their-milkshake-brings-all-the-boys-to-the-other-store/147568/ This fast food cashier]] refuses to honor the submitter's coupon, stating that it cannot be used with any offer, ''including the one that the coupon is for''. Worse yet, the manager backs up her reasoning, at which point the submitter gives up and leaves. Fortunately, an out-of-town location honors the coupon without question. |
| 180 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/ill-have-a-slice-of-cancellation/156988/ According to this pizza place,]] it's perfectly normal to cancel customers' orders without telling them when things get too busy, but it's okay, because they don't charge them. |
| 181 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/hard-no-to-soft-pretzels/181076/ Why]] would you display pretzels (albeit plastic ones) if you don't intend on selling them in-store? |
| 182 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/if-theres-anyone-who-needs-a-beer-its-a-parent-of-a-teenager/181084/ This employee]] thinks that just because the submitter's son touched a bottle of beer, he thinks that it warrants carding the kid because he handled it. The epilogue states that if the employee was ''explicitly'' told that the submitter was buying alcohol for her kid, ''only then'' he could refuse the sale. |
| 183 | ** The client called to ask which number to put on their new bank cards, so [[https://notalwaysright.com/dont-bank-on-getting-the-right-number/239334/ I gave them the number from my card for the credit union]]. Who cares if that's not the company they bank with? They asked for a number and I gave them a number! |
| 184 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/weve-got-this-investigation-locked-down/251204/ The OP here]] is nearly written up because after a [[BlatantLies "thorough investigation"]] by HR, a coworker took medication (later noted to be ibuprofen) and had an allergic reaction, while the OP was on vacation. The OP objects, for the following reasons: |
| 185 | *** The medication was in a lockbox inside the OP’s desk in the OP’s office. The office was locked, and the three keys that could unlock the door were in possession of the OP, the building owner, and the janitor, meaning in order to get inside the office, the coworker would have had to either break in or enter the office while it was being cleaned. |
| 186 | *** The desk was also locked, and the only keys that could have unlocked the desk drawer were in the possession of the OP, meaning that she would have either had to break into the desk or find a key that nobody knew about. |
| 187 | *** The only keys to the lockbox itself were also in the OP’s possession, meaning that the coworker would have needed to break in or have a copy of the lockbox key, which is almost impossible, given that the only two keys to the lockbox were in OP’s possession. |
| 188 | *** The coworker had multiple times noted to be allergic to ibuprofen, which means that she took a drug she knew she was allergic to, and lied to HR that she didn’t know about the allergy. |
| 189 | *** After talking to HR and getting out of the writeup, the OP checked their office and found no evidence of tampering, with every pill in the lockbox accounted for. |
| 190 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/you-cant-fire-me-i-quit-being-fired/282696/ This woman]] reads some work advice online after being fired and then turns up to work the next day anyway under the belief that she cannot be fired if she doesn't accept the termination (the papers to which she'd ''already signed''). Security nearly has to drag her out. |
| 191 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/youre-not-entitled-to-anyones-backstory-especially-if-youre-a-bigot/283028/ This bigoted cashier]] finds out that the submitter previously had their name changed. She then decides that only two types of people get their name changed: those in Witness Protection and transgender people, and since the submitter cannot admit to being in Witness Protection they must therefore be transgender (and then 'outs' them to anyone who will listen). The hate subsequently gets her suspended, while most of her coworkers weren't paying her too much attention anyway. |
| 192 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/theyre-gonna-regret-that-in-the-morning/292305/ This company]] fires the submitter because they abruptly decided they no longer wanted to pay the worker what they wanted. The submitter was working there for free. |
| 193 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/thats-not-how-that-works-thank-god/314429/ This tech support employee]] comes to the utterly bizarre conclusion that the reason the submitter mother's garage door is randomly opening and closing is because there are tarantulas in the wires...as in they're physically ''inside'' the wires and chewing through them to try to get out, and this is what is making the door open and close randomly. The kicker is that this was apparently the only solution the tech support employee could come up with, as she gives up trying to solve the problem entirely after the submitter's mother (after sitting in [[StunnedSilence baffled silence]] for a moment) goes over the reasons why this couldn't possibly be why her door was opening and closing randomly. |
| 194 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/a-life-lesson-learned-before-its-too-late/322538/ This boss]]'s justification for giving the submitter a promotion but not a raise: |
| 195 | --->'''Boss:''' You see, the more money you make, the more you spend. I want to save you from this terrible vicious circle. |
| 196 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/the-one-time-someone-bothers-to-read-a-sign/279709/ This new hire]] sees a sign that says anything on the table is up for grabs. So she takes food that belonged to other workers, then puts it on the table before eating it. [[TheyJustDontGetIt She's utterly baffled when the submitter tells her that isn't how it works.]] |
| 197 | * InsigniaRipOffRitual: Happens to [[http://notalwaysright.com/hater-waiter this waiter]], after his boss catches him lying about a customer throwing a tantrum. |
| 198 | * InsistentTerminology: [[http://notalwaysright.com/soft-drinks-can-bubble-up-hard-feelings "IT'S SODA!"]] |
| 199 | * IRejectYourReality: |
| 200 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/the-gift-card-that-gave-up-giving/159905/ Here]]. A cashier at a department store insists that they don't take the card the OP is offering -- which is a $100 gift card for said store. They call a manager, who is ''also'' adamant that they don't take it. After running the card, the manager triumphantly declares that it didn't cover the sale -- which is true, not because they don't take the card but because the amount was for $101.62, and there is still $1.62 to pay. The OP, increasingly annoyed, pays the remainder in cash and insists they type it in, hit cash and see what happens. Of course, the register promptly acknowledges the transaction and provides a receipt, to the astonished disbelief of both the manager and cashier, who are seemingly unable to process the fact that, yes, you can pay for goods at their store with '''one of the store's own gift cards'''. |
| 201 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/spaced-out-on-spatial-reasoning/234562/ A worker at a lab]] claims that a residue bin does not have a lid (it's for biohazard waste, so can't be collected without one), claiming it's a square bin. It isn't; it's round. She then claims that none of the round lids fit it. The poster promptly proves otherwise by fitting a round lid on it, pointing out that all of the round lids fit all the round bins. She then starts repeatedly insisting "That is not its lid!" even as the poster is carrying away the closed bin for proper disposal. |
| 202 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/its-really-taxing-to-be-perfect/250714/ This Truck Salesman]] refuses to accept he's not a good salesman as he always believe he's perfect and never does wrong in his mind and [[NeverMyFault ignores the many mistakes he made]]. It got to the point he refuses to do his business mileage records as part of the UK's new road tax laws and wants to do it the old way - much to the annoyance of his boss, who keeps telling the salesman he cannot do his road taxes the old way, but must instead do them the new way as stated by law. This would come back to bite him years later when he got in trouble with the tax authorities for not submitting his mileage records. |
| 203 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/so-stubborn-you-doubt-your-own-identity/264424/ A pest control employee]] speaks to a church's office manager (the submitter) prior to him coming to spray for bugs. When he arrives, though, the man swears up and down and all around that he spoke to a different, older office manager before, despite the submitter telling him at length multiple times that she ''is'' the person he spoke to before and is the church's only office manager, having been so for years. He's so convinced of this that after a certain point the submitter even wonders for a fleeting moment if the church really ''did'' have a second office manager she didn't know about. |
| 204 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/you-cant-fire-me-i-quit-being-fired/282696/ This woman]] refuses to accept that she's been fired, having apparently interpreted some already dubious online advice that said "YOU'RE in charge, not them" to mean that she could just reject her termination letter and keep on earning a paycheque with them. |
| 205 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/this-spells-trouble-part-6/325380/ This worker]] throws her entire workplace's documentation into disarray because she was responsible for typing up handwritten reports, and she was abusing the spellcheck program's 'Add to Dictionary' function because [[KnowNothingKnowItAll she was convinced that her (terrible) spelling was right and the computer was wrong]]. |
| 206 | * IronicEcho: |
| 207 | ** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/karmas-a-sandwich That was worth it for the look on your faces.]]" |
| 208 | ** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/take-it-personally-to-the-bank It's nothing personal.]]" |
| 209 | ** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/driving-on-snake-oil Be nice.]]" |
| 210 | ** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/not-my-problem-coworkers Ain't my problem.]]" |
| 211 | ** In [[https://notalwaysright.com/they-can-both-go-forklift-themselves/301644/ this story]], an unfriendly guy takes an inexplicable dislike to the submitter and constantly makes snide comments at their expense, and the management does nothing to get him off their back while giving them the non-advice "You'll figure it out." Eventually, the situation escalates to the point where the unfriendly guy takes an innocuous question as an excuse to blow up at them and falsely accuse them of blowing up at him, and the management still refuses to intervene and gives the submitter the same non-advice. The submitter quits on the spot, and when the managers ask who's going to do their job if they leave without notice, the submitter throws their words back at them: "I'm sure you'll figure it out." |
| 212 | * IsThisThingStillOn: |
| 213 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/hello-how-may-i-judge-you When putting someone on hold, make sure they really are.]] And ''always'' mind what you say. |
| 214 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/dont-hold-him-to-it Another example]] involving a hold button mishap. At least this time they were insulting other employees, not the customer. |
| 215 | ** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/will-be-muted-for-the-rest-of-the-day You're not on mute.]]" |
| 216 | ** "[[http://notalwaysright.com/outspoken-speaker I was tempted]] to wait a few seconds more before I calmly revealed to them that every single employee and customer in the store was now privy to their dirty conversation." |
| 217 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/get-headset-game-2/104224/ A much sillier example]] where the submitter and their friends realize that they can hear an employee [[ClusterFBomb fussing at]] and joking with another employee through a drive-thru speaker at a coffee shop adjacent to the restaurant they're eating at because she forgot to turn her headset off. |
| 218 | ** In [[https://notalwaysright.com/number-one-manager-becomes-number-two/107876/ this story]], a visiting manager accidentally sets his walkie-talkie to broadcast to the whole staff while he uses the men's room. |
| 219 | * ItMakesSenseInContext: [[https://notalwaysright.com/thats-not-mean-edibles/90227/ This submitter]] runs headlong into this trope. |
| 220 | -->'''Submitter (on phone with client):''' “That makes so much sense. So, it’s not just savages and psychopaths that indulge in cannibalism?”\ |
| 221 | […]\ |
| 222 | '''Boss:''' ''*sticking her head out of her office*'' “I’m sure there’s context for that, but I’m not sure I want to know it, [Submitter]. I’m just glad I already had lunch.” |
| 223 | * ItsAllAboutMe: As can be found on [[ItsAllAboutMe/NotAlwaysRight their own page]]. |
| 224 | [[/folder]] |
| 225 | |
| 226 | [[folder:J–K]] |
| 227 | * JeopardyThinkingMusic: Used by [[http://notalwaysright.com/jeopardizing-your-chances-of-a-sale this father]] to thwart a telemarketer. |
| 228 | * {{Jerkass}}: Just like sister site Not Always Right, Not Always Working has more than a few jerks – [[Jerkass/NotAlwaysRight now to be seen on their own page]]. |
| 229 | * JokeOfTheButt: Causes [[https://notalwaysright.com/land-o-laughs/327117/ this new cashier]] to burst out laughing in front of a confused customer when some Land-O-Lakes branded butter she just scanned shows up on the store's register as "LOL BUTT". |
| 230 | * JumpingToConclusionsDiagnosis: [[https://notalwaysright.com/even-the-author-can-smell-nuts/224070/ This story]] involves a group of co-workers in which one has lacked a sense of smell since birth. When it comes up in a conversation taking place during the UsefulNotes/COVID19Pandemic, one of the people listening gets the idea that the person has the virus and is hiding their other symptoms. |
| 231 | * KarmaHoudini: The misogynist coworker [[https://notalwaysright.com/the-squeaky-wheel-gets-a-promotion/224013/ in this story]] not only gets management to investigate the submitter for "hostility" (calling out his harassment), but ultimately gets KickedUpstairs so he can harass women who aren't her. |
| 232 | * KarmicJackpot: |
| 233 | ** A financially-challenged patient always does their best to make the minimum monthly payments on an ER debt, so the billing department clerk [[http://notalwaysright.com/bill-ieve-in-the-kindness-of-strangers decides to forgive the debt completely]]. |
| 234 | ** A kid and their father have a weekly tradition of renting movies from a store, making them regular, reliable customers. When the store goes out of business, [[http://notalwaysright.com/still-has-a-movies-happy-ending one of the employees tells the kid to take whatever they want, and not worry about returning it]] — they'll be getting rid of the movies when they close, anyway. |
| 235 | ** An employee makes a costly mistake normally punishable by firing, but also every effort to report and fix it as soon as possible, and she has a flawless work record, so [[https://notalwaysright.com/good-honest-work/63428/ the accounting manager and HR forgive her completely without even a write-up]]. |
| 236 | * KarmicTrickster: The IT employee submitter in [[https://notalwaysright.com/revenge-is-always-the-real-thing/119805/ this story]], which plays out almost like a real life ''WesternAnimation/LooneyTunes'' short. A new teacher at the school the submitter works at steals the submitter's soda and pointedly refuses to pay the submitter back for it despite saying that he would (when the submitter confronts the teacher, the teacher claims to not know what the submitter is talking about and laughs them off). The teacher walks, and the IT employee decides to teach the teacher a lesson. When later setting up the teacher's new computer, the submitter makes his password "[=J3rk&Th!ef=]". Then they set the computer's start-up sound to be very loud audio from a soda commercial. Finally, all of the teacher's documents have "I steal from my coworkers" added to the header and bottom of them and the documents have "I'm a thief" automatically added to their filenames. It doesn't take very long for the teacher to admit defeat and pay the submitter the money he owes them, and the ending suggests that the teacher [[DefeatEqualsFriendship never did anything like this again]]. |
| 237 | * TheKeyIsBehindTheLock: |
| 238 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/sub-standard-operating-procedures To open a ticket]] about email not working, please send an email. [[http://notalwaysright.com/infinitely-loopy-part-3 The password for email]] will be [[http://notalwaysright.com/infinitely-loopy emailed to you]]. |
| 239 | ** Please immediately report stolen passport [[http://notalwaysright.com/bureau-crazy-part-2 to the embassy]], which you may enter upon showing a valid passport. |
| 240 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/infinitely-loopy-part-5 Please bring a bank statement]] to open a new bank account.[[note]]While presumably a statement from a ''different'' bank would work, this particular customer has never ''had'' a bank account before, with ''any'' bank.[[/note]] |
| 241 | ** An [[http://notalwaysright.com/youve-got-to-be-key-dding-me almost literal variant]]. |
| 242 | ** Several examples where a person is trying to cancel a service or close an account for a dead relative and get told their relative has to come in in person. One had to say "he's DEAD" at least three times. |
| 243 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-so-smart-phone-part-6 Your broken phone's replacement is here.]] We've notified you by sending a text message to your broken phone. |
| 244 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-quite-the-picture-perfect-resolution "...You want a photo? Of the parts we haven't got? What, you want me to just take a photo of my desk with nothing on it?"]] |
| 245 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/cant-quite-pin-down-that-line-of-thinking This submitter]] calls an alarm company because they've forgotten the four-digit PIN to log in with. The first verification that the tech asks for? The very four-digit PIN that the submitter has forgotten! |
| 246 | ** Don't know how our company creates passwords? Not to worry, [[https://notalwaysright.com/the-password-is-catch-22/65184/ I'll send you a document explaining it]]. Password protected, of course. |
| 247 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/not-taking-direct-router/106629/ This tech support worker]] tells the submitter, a computer technician, that she'll have to download a virus checker to get rid of a (nonexistent) virus that supposedly caused DHCP flooding before her internet, which the ISP intentionally disabled because of said virus, is reinstated. Ignoring the fact this wouldn't help anyway because the real culprit is a malfunctioning router, only someone seriously HopelessWithTech would fail to see the problem here, and the submitter immediately chuckles at the impossible request. Also, the ISP tried to tell her that they'd disabled her internet through an email even though, given that this happened in December 2007, smartphones and data plans are niche and likely useless in rural Canada. |
| 248 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/this-flow-chart-needs-to-log-out/159254/ Oh, you've been locked out of your online banking account? Well, first you need to log in to your account...]] To their credit, the service desk assistant — who is JustFollowingOrders — does eventually realise how utterly stupid those orders are; as it turns out, they haven't actually been given any other way to help with the problem. |
| 249 | ** What's that, a fire destroyed everything inside your home? We can't cancel your cable service until you return the cable box, [[https://notalwaysright.com/where-theres-smoke-theres-getting-fired-part-2/58418/ which was destroyed in the fire]]. |
| 250 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/if-thats-what-you-want-soviet/188746/ “I was just telling her I can’t open a complaint form until she receives a letter telling her they didn’t receive her letter.”]] |
| 251 | * {{Kiai}}: One possible explanation as to why [[https://notalwaysright.com/amazing-what-a-little-cognitive-recalibration-can-do/328825/ this co-worker]] shouts "NEIL DEGRASSE TYSON!" before ''headbutting'' a VengefulVending Machine. |
| 252 | * KillItWithFire: According to [[http://notalwaysright.com/when-live-wires-get-their-wires-crossed this electrician]], ItsTheOnlyWayToBeSure to kill a spider. |
| 253 | * KillSteal: In [[http://notalwaysright.com/her-prized-obsession "Her Prized Obsession]]," some sales associates are competing to see who can get the most rewards card sign-ups. |
| 254 | -->"I think I should get counted for this signup instead of you, because I spent so much time with her!" |
| 255 | * TheKlutz: The family in [[http://notalwaysright.com/avoiding-law-suits-in-swim-suits this story]]. Three of the four members manage to injure themselves in a water park. Thankfully, the employees are understanding and even give them free passes. |
| 256 | * KnightInSourArmor: [[http://notalwaysright.com/not-always-right-is-never-wrong This manager]] provides the best customer service, but not because he actually ''cares'' about the often-idiotic customer; he just wants them to ''think'' he cares so they'll pay the bill and leave happy and with a minimum of fuss. |
| 257 | * KnowNothingKnowItAll: |
| 258 | ** A distressing number of stories set in a hospital will involve nurses and even doctors that apparently never actually went to medical school but still blow off legitimate concerns from a patient with nothing more than "I know better than you because I'm a nurse/the doctor." |
| 259 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/a-titanic-gap-in-your-knowledge This tour guide]] seems to have got it in her head that she knows everything there is to know about the ''Titanic'' without having to do any research simply by ''being'' a tour guide, and as such she becomes very angry when the submitter, who ''has'' done the research, turns out to know more than she does. |
| 260 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/seizing-up-at-the-facts/176705/ This security guard]] seems to think his medical knowledge is equivalent to that of an experienced surgeon [[IKnowMortalKombat just because he watches a lot of medical dramas]], and therefore he can tell that an epileptic seizure was faked because the man deliberately laid down before the seizure, and therefore it's a WoundedGazelleGambit intended to lead to a lawsuit (never mind the fact the man stated that the casino was not at fault). What he doesn't realize is that medical dramas prioritize pacing, viewer comprehension, and the RuleOfDrama [[ArtisticLicenseMedicine over medical accuracy]] and, among other things, tend to exaggerate medical emergencies as a result. This includes epileptic seizures, which in fiction happen out of nowhere causing injury because drama, whereas on ''this'' side of the fourth wall, most epileptic people can mitigate them because an "[[SpiderSense aura]]" alerts them to what's about to happen, hence the man lying down. Several real medical professionals have trouble convincing him that it was an actual epileptic fit because he holds so much faith in his medical drama knowledge. |
| 261 | ** The only possible explanation for why [[https://notalwaysright.com/one-of-the-worst-managers-youve-ever-produced/135206/ this produce manager]], even after being told by his boss that he was being written up for telling his employees to handle produce crates in an unsafe manner, and even being told there was a post for it, he decided to yell at an employee he wrongfully fired and tell her she deserved to die for not doing things "the right way" [[TooDumbToLive right in front of his boss]]; he thinks he's right [[ItsAllAboutMe and everyone actually trying to follow and enforce the actual rules are wrong]]. |
| 262 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/apparently-temporary-was-more-temporary-than-he-thought/318183/ This salesperson]] is seemingly unable to let any kind of disagreement go, even when he's clearly in the wrong, and uses the fact that he's physically bigger than most employees (the submitter being a notable exception) to trap them in a room with him until they admit he's right. |
| 263 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/this-spells-trouble-part-6/325380/ This worker]] was repsonsible for typing up handwritten notes, and didn't realize that her spelling was ''awful'', so she abused her computer's spellcheck's 'Add to Dictionary' function [[IRejectYourReality because she figured the computer was wrong]]. She winds up throwing her entire office into disarray. |
| 264 | * KubrickStare: The submitter of [[https://notalwaysright.com/and-nothing-of-value-was-lost-part-2/276999/ this story]] has been told they get a Kubrick Stare whenever they get truly pissed off. |
| 265 | [[/folder]] |
| 266 | |
| 267 | [[folder:L]] |
| 268 | * LaboriousLaziness: [[https://notalwaysright.com/sleeping-smarter-not-harder/257417/ This guy]] rearranged a bunch of shipping pallets in the warehouse to create a hidden nap room. |
| 269 | * LackOfEmpathy: The "Wow. Not A Single Drop Of Compassion." tetralogy displays this: |
| 270 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/wow-not-a-single-drop-of-compassion/262194/ Part 1:]] When the submitter has a miscarriage, their manager denies them time off to recover and has them come back to the store right away, and [[KickTheDog for good measure]] assigns her to ''the babycare aisle''. |
| 271 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/wow-not-a-single-drop-of-compassion-part-2/293578/ Part 2:]] The submitter's mother tells her "son of the devil" boss that she has to take care of her terminally ill husband. |
| 272 | --->'''Boss:''' “So, when is this all going to be over and done with?”\ |
| 273 | '''Submitter's mother:''' ''*Staring at him in shock*'' “You mean… when is my husband going to die?!”\ |
| 274 | '''Boss:''' “Yeah. It needs to hurry up so you can get back to work.” |
| 275 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/wow-not-a-single-drop-of-compassion-part-3/299679/ Part 3:]] Another miscarriage example, where the boss forces the submitter to come to work without giving her time to recover. |
| 276 | --->'''Boss:''' “I thought you’d be over it by now.”\ |
| 277 | '''Submitter:''' “I lost my baby!”\ |
| 278 | '''Boss:''' “No, you didn’t. You lost a ''fetus''. It’s not like it was a living, breathing baby. I’ve met and heard stories of people who actually have lost children, in accidents and worse. They spent time caring and loving their children as they grew, tending to their needs, and helping them when they cried. [[KickTheDog You didn’t. Get out there and serve that table, or I will fire you.]]”\ |
| 279 | ''[[ScrewThisImOuttaHere After work, I gave my notice.]]'' |
| 280 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/wow-not-a-single-drop-of-compassion-part-4/326342/ Part 4:]] The submitter's manager is downright ''gleeful'' when another worker has a miscarriage since that means she won't be needing maternity leave. Unfortunately, the worker hears him say this, and [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere resigns on the spot]]. |
| 281 | * LamePunReaction: |
| 282 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/wishing-for-pun-tea-total This person]] groans at an employee's tea pun. |
| 283 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/you-make-me-zoo-icidal And this zoo worker's]] boss makes him tell customers bad zoo puns. |
| 284 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/germans-dont-joke-about-sports/251202/ This story]] probably features the one time that making a bad pun could be a fireable offence. |
| 285 | * LaserGuidedKarma: As with the rest of ''Website/NotAlwaysRight'', this is the point of most stories, if not the vast majority of them. [[LaserGuidedKarma/NotAlwaysRight Has its own page]]. |
| 286 | * LawfulStupid: |
| 287 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/that-had-better-be-tomato-sauce-on-the-pizza/172883/ this rather eventful story]], a pizza delivery guy is ''insistent'' that he hand the pizzas off to the submitter because their name is on the order, and [[FailedASpotCheck doesn't seem to notice]] that the submitter is the only thing holding another person's ''bleeding artery''. |
| 288 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/with-spacey-nurses-nobody-can-hear-you-scream/59146/ This nurse]] says that she can't tell the submitter's test results to her mother over the phone unless the submitter verbally gives her permission. Only problem is, the submitter's voice is completely gone. Despite the submitter's mother's attempts to explain this, the nurse [[TheyJustDontGetIt can't seem to understand how this is impossible]] until the submitter attempts to tell the nurse that her mother has permission and is only able to emit "a strangled sounding breath." |
| 289 | * LazyBum: |
| 290 | ** As part of [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere "She didn't stay with us much longer,]] quitting because her [[SarcasmMode unreasonable manager]] would insist on picking her up each morning half an hour before starting time, and [[https://notalwaysright.com/going-the-distance-to-be-lazy/191159/ she did not like getting out of bed that early."]] |
| 291 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/the-phantom-crapper-is-a-serial-napper/246796/ This workplace]] has a "phantom crapper" who spends most of his time in one of the mens' toilet stalls instead of working. After numerous attempts to find out who he is are unsuccessful, a fire drill eventually finds him out, as it turns out he was napping in the stall while wearing noise-cancelling headphones. |
| 292 | * ALessonLearnedTooWell: [[https://notalwaysright.com/dont-make-things-harder-for-yourself/276449/ This co-worker]] takes much longer to do tasks than everyone else. The submitter shadows her to see what the problem is and finds that she's "researching" just about everything about every order she processes, even when that's supposed to be done by other departments, taking ten minutes on orders that usually take thirty seconds. When the submitter asks her about this, she explains that at previous jobs, every order she processed was considered "her" order, so if something went wrong, she would be held responsible, so she felt she had to follow up on ''every little thing''. On the other hand, she's so worried about getting into trouble that the submitter can't decide if her previous jobs were ''that'' scary or if she's just so paranoid she did all those extra tasks herself out of fear she wasn't doing enough.[[note]]Most commenters favour the former explanation[[/note]] |
| 293 | * LethalChef: [[https://notalwaysright.com/way-worse-than-a-bee-in-your-bonnet/275316/ The chefs at this French restaurant]] accidentally bake a ''wasp'' into the OP's bread, and get a thorough scolding from the OP's teacher for it. |
| 294 | * LethallyStupid: |
| 295 | ** [[http://unfiltered.notalwaysright.com/post/121703289991/movie-theater-kingston-uk-i-go-and-see These]] ushers, instead of quietly going up to a moviegoer and asking him to stop playing with his phone, point out the moviegoer who complained! To make matters worse, the moviegoer who complained and her friend were small, young women and the disobedient one was [[ScaryBlackMan a tall man]] described as being 'like a {{Football Hooligan|s}}' and he's waiting by [[FridgeHorror the entrance]]. Luckily, nothing bad happened to the girls. |
| 296 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/we-can-weather-the-storm-but-the-boss-may-kill-us/305200/ This call centre supervisor]] goes on an extended power trip by setting restrictive rules. The first is to ban all drinks from the floor unless someone has a doctor's note (in which case they can only have water); this gets reversed after staff with diabetes complain. Then she decides to 'remove all distractions' by banning having personal phones and news [=TVs=] in the office, which means that everyone is only aware of a ''tornado'' heading in their direction when a customer tells them so. Even as the emergency procedures are put into place she rants at them to get back to work, only shutting up when the tornado rips the roof of the building off. After the event [[LaserGuidedKarma she's fired fairly promptly.]] |
| 297 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/fire-him-before-he-kills-someone/319054/ This equipment operator]] keeps the forks of his forklift-like device raised even when it's not raising or lowering equipment, despite the submitter's warnings that a collision in this state could topple the machine. Fortunately, when this actually happens, only equipment is damaged, but the submitter, their coworkers, and the editors are all well aware that it could hurt or kill somebody if it happens again and are in total disbelief that the employee still has his job after this. |
| 298 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/business-is-really-booming/323590/ This manager]] and some of his colleagues disabled the fire alarms so they wouldn't have to disrupt work for a false alarm. When the building receives a (false) bomb alert, it takes an additional twenty minutes for their floor to evacuate because they didn't hear the alarms, which could have been deadly in a real emergency. [[LaserGuidedKarma The managers were fired, arrested, and sent to prison]], as California takes its fire safety ''very'' seriously. |
| 299 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/finally-a-positive-reaction-part-2/324319/ This worker at an amusement park]] thinks it's more practical to just ''show'' customers food that could have allergens in them rather than get a manager or supervisor with their allergy book to specifically identify which foods could have a possible and/or not-obvious allergen in them, ignorantly and needlessly risking the health (or ''life!'') of a young boy with a litany of allergies. Fortunately, a supervisor comes to the rescue and helps the kid and his family make a decision, and the coworker is transferred away from selling food at the park for her troubles (as is a manager friend of hers after helping her spread untrue rumors about the submitter as payback for the incident). |
| 300 | * LethalNegligence: [[https://notalwaysright.com/good-thing-didnt-weight-longer/99375/ This boarding kennel]] leaves the submitter's mother's dog without food for ''three days'' when the food the submitter's mother left them ran out. By the submitter and their mother's admission, their mother should have calculated how much food was needed better, but the kennel also made no attempt to contact her when they ran out. Thankfully, the dog lived. |
| 301 | * LifesavingMisfortune: |
| 302 | ** The owner in [[https://notalwaysright.com/the-boss-didnt-record-your-request/56550/ this story]] had to miss a flight to deal with the fallout from the screw-up of his studio manager… said flight being [[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pan_Am_Flight_103 Pan Am Flight 103]]. |
| 303 | ** Downplayed in [[https://notalwaysright.com/sippy-cup-or-tipsy-cup/60507/ this story]], where a little girl spills her virgin strawberry daiquiri because it was served in an adult cup. When the server goes to the bar to get a new one in a kid's cup, they find out the bartender accidentally made the previous one with alcohol. |
| 304 | * LightbulbJoke: |
| 305 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/two-to-hold-the-bulb-one-to-turn-the-room Referenced here.]] |
| 306 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/three-two-to-get-stumped-by-it-one-to-return-it This]] return of a defective item ends with the similar joke, "How many employees does it take to open a blender?" |
| 307 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/your-job-is-a-joke Here]] is one where a customer gets a chance to do it. |
| 308 | * LiteralMetaphor: |
| 309 | ** "As I've been saying, gentlemen, if you want to talk to the witness, you're really going to have to [[http://notalwaysright.com/were-not-clownin-around talk to the clown down there."]] |
| 310 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/promotional-materials-in-more-ways-than-one/324343/ This prospective theater manager]] makes an "elephant in the room" joke about the ''Film/Dumbo2019'' promotional material getting in the way during an interview with their boss. [[ActuallyPrettyFunny The boss promotes them on the spot.]] |
| 311 | * LiteralMinded: |
| 312 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/this-story-takes-the-cake This bakery employee]], when instructed to "draw hearts", wrote just that. |
| 313 | ** [[http://unfiltered.notalwaysright.com/post/85027272525/restaurant-wisconsin-usa-we-are-driving-to-go This Cashier]] doesn't seem to realize hamburger doesn't really need ham. |
| 314 | ** [[http://notalwaysright.com/penny-dreadful-service This waiter]], when told by the customer she wanted to bring the wine bottle home, rather than cork the half full wine bottle, proceeds to dump and waste the wine into a bucket and give the customer the empty bottle. Needless to say, the waiter only got tipped a penny for his stupidity, and was fired some time after. |
| 315 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/their-milkshake-brings-all-the-boys-to-the-other-store/147568/ This cashier]] refuses to take a coupon, thinking the phrase "this coupon cannot be combined with any other offer" applies to ''all'' offers, ''including the exact offer that the coupon was for to begin with''. Worse yet, when the submitter calls for her manager, he sides with the cashier, at which point the submitter gives up and leaves empty-handed. Luckily, a location in the next town over accepts the coupon without question. |
| 316 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/maybe-jesus-should-be-your-supplier/169380/ This cashier]] thinks that a "limit of 2 per customer" stipulation for a sale price on bread means that the customer isn't allowed to buy more than 2 loaves of bread at all, regardless of if they're charged the regular price for the extra loaves. |
| 317 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/forever-21-3/169412/ This cashier]] believes that it's illegal to sell somebody alcohol unless they're ''exactly'' 21 years old [[SustainedMisunderstanding (and refuses to acknowledge the 'or older' part of the policy)]]. |
| 318 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/speaking-too-plainly/179545/ A customer]] orders a hamburger with nothing on it and is given an empty bun without even a patty on it. |
| 319 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/enough-to-make-your-blood-boil-2/65892/ This restaurant trainee]] through a combination of only taking in the last things she was told to do and a literal interpretation of "always watch it" is convinced that the hot water for tea will boil dry if she takes her eyes off it for even a second. |
| 320 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/in-the-same-aisle-as-the-spit-polish/64445/ “You should have seen the looks I got in the drug store when I went in and asked where they kept the elbow grease.”]] |
| 321 | * LoopholeAbuse: |
| 322 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/scheduling-their-own-demise/155326/ This manager]] makes last-second changes to the schedules of employees that she doesn't like, to effectively give herself a reason to discipline them. One employee fights back after being wrongfully fired this way and [[RevealingCoverUp exposes her whole scheme]] in doing so, which results in [[LaserGuidedKarma the manager's own termination]]. |
| 323 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/i-would-walk-500-miles-just-to-screw-the-jerks-im-working-for/218815/ This company]] insists that if any of their employees miss a target, they have to travel to meet their area manager for a short meeting to describe how they're going to fix it. They make the mistake of specifying that the company itself will cover all costs of travel and other expenses for these meetings. Cue the submitter: With less than a month before they leave the job for other reasons, and having missed one of said targets by ''2%'', they spend £1200 of the company's money to travel to the other end of the country just to tell their boss that they don't plan on changing their work at all. |
| 324 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/they-probably-werent-banking-on-that-loophole/235967/ This bank]] charges a fee for paying bills in cash, but there's no fee for depositing cash, or for paying bills by deducting from your account. So the customer deposits the cash he was going to use to pay the bill, then immediately pays the bill out of his account, thus circumventing the fee. The teller finds it ActuallyPrettyFunny and allows it, which might imply that they think that the policy is dumb too, but can't do anything to fix it. |
| 325 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/if-you-cant-be-on-time-be-obscenely-early/233998/ This police station]] will cancel fingerprint appointments and delete your info if you're so much as five minutes late, but you can arrive any amount of time early and be seen. After being late to a Friday appointment, the submitter reschedules for Monday, then claims to be [[RefugeInAudacity seventy-two hours early]] to their Monday appointment. The officer is aggravated but can't do anything about it. |
| 326 | ** [[https://notalwaysright.com/unfair-policies-call-for-underhanded-tactics/291409/ This grocery store manager]] raises the starting pay for new employees 75 cents higher than normal wages, but when the submitter asks if employees who already work at the store will also be getting the raise, the manager is adamant that they do not get the raise. The submitter promptly quits their job...and then a few days later applies again and is hired back. The manager is not happy but still gives the submitter the new hire bonus raise anyway (along with a $250 referral bonus). |
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