Line #117 Funny/TheAvengers1960s


1	[[foldercontrol]]
2
3	[[folder:First season]]
4	* In "The Frighteners", Dr. Keel describes his misadventures with the Deacon to Steed, who fumes, "So, Keels rush in where Steeds and angels fear to tread!" The Doctor admits sheepishly, "Well, I suppose it was a bit melodramatic."
5	[[/folder]]
6
7	[[folder:Cathy Gale era]]
8	* "Death Dispatch":
9	** Steed's bantering with the inept Travers at the British embassy is utterly hysterical.
10	** Steed phones Cathy while she is half-dressed and asks, "Are you decent?"
11	* "Propellant 23" has a scene where Steed and Gale meet up in a department store:
12	-->'''Gale''': Do you always arrange to take your calls in a lingerie department?
13	-->'''Steed''': If humanly possible.
14	* In "Death on the Rocks", Cathy asks Jackie, "Do come and meet my mother in law, she's quite a character"; Steed's reaction is ''priceless''.
15	* In "Warlock", an inebriated Steed is remarking to Cathy about discovering her breaking into the scientist's library. She barks, "Did I break any bones?"
16	* In "Conspiracy of Silence", when Steed asks Gale how she knew so much about tattoos, she replies that she took it up in school instead of needlework. This makes Creator/PatrickMacnee burst out laughing and Creator/HonorBlackman smile.
17	* "Six Hands Across the Table":
18	** Gale is deeply annoyed at Steed entering via her bedroom window.
19	-->Go out and come through the front door like a civilized human being.
20	** Steed, looking through Gale's snapshots:
21	-->Well, he's in every one. Hey, you could take some color ones of him—I'll get you some film, very fast, very special... ''([[{{Corpsing}} At which point Blackman works very hard to stifle a broad grin.)]]''
22	** Gale defending her Handsome Harry:
23	-->'''Gale''': He was with me when it happened.
24	-->'''Steed''': Well, he must have had his hands full.
25	* In "Brief for Murder", during a rendezvous following Cathy's "murder," Seed greets Cathy with, "Liveliest looking corpus I ever saw—oh, and very dilecti, if I may say so."
26	* "Concerto":
27	** Steed and Zalenko trading hats.
28	**
29	-->'''Steed''': What were you trying to do to your 'friend'?
30	-->'''Zalenko''': Disjoint his left arm from its socket over my right shoulder.
31	-->'''Steed''': And where did you learn that particular piece of nastiness?
32	-->'''Zalenko''': Saturday afternoon British television, last time I was here. You should watch.
33	* In "Man with Two Shadows", Steed casually asks Cathy what's for breakfast. She fires back, "Cook it and see."
34	* In "The Nutshell", Steed meets with Elin, the escapologist who broke into Nutshell, in the midst of a rehearsal by another escapologist in training who is not doing very well—much to Steed's amusement. "It's the crisscross behind the knees that did it."
35	* "Death of a Batman":
36	** Reading aloud a newspaper account of Lady Cynthia, Cathy briefly imitates her with a simply marvelous gesture.
37	** Whilst creeping through a florist shop after hours, Steed encounters a miniature Venus statue (which is of course armless) and quietly quips, "That's what comes with biting your fingernails."
38	* In "November Five", Steed is studying a typewriter to see if it had been used to generate a damning piece of evidence and observes, "Blunt F, squint I, H above the line... a very good description of my Auntie Queenie."
39	* In "The Grandeur That Was Rome", Steed develops Cathy's photographs while singing "[[{{Pun}} Some Day, My Prints Will Come]]".
40	* In "The Golden Fleece", Cathy, furious with Steed for wining and dining her but not filling her in on all the details, growls, "He who does not tell truth gets cushion in eye." Whereupon she duly fires a pillow across the room at Steed.
41	* In "Death à la Carte", Steed pokes fun at the hotel's help, who is reading a gossip magazine.
42	-->She only started to develop when she took up weight lifting.
43	* In "Dressed to Kill", Steed is describing to Cathy the false missile report.
44	-->It was a close call, though. Another few seconds and you and I would've been mutating by now.
45	* In "Mandrake", Steed relates that Mr. Benson didn't care much for his wife:
46	-->If there was fog in the air, Mrs. Benson was in the air.
47	* In "Trojan Horse", Cathy quizzes Steed at the racetrack:
48	-->What did you really want me down here for?
49	-->I'm a bit rusty on my tic-tac.
50	* In "Build a Better Mousetrap", Steed is chatting up the Peck sisters with nonsense about the "National Distrust."
51	* In "The Outside-In Man", Quilpy, Steed's superior, stands at the door of the meat locker and says, "Well, come into the 'fridge—there's still one or two things to be done."
52	* In "The Charmers", Steed asks Miss Lawrence if she would like a drink. "Not before sundown," she replies. "Of course, you could draw the curtains."
53	* In "Espirit de Corps", just prior to leaving her apartment to carry on sleuthing at the army base, Cathy asks Steed, "Anything you want to draw from stores?" Steed quips, "Yes, but—uh—I doubt if you'd issue it." Honor almost bursts out laughing at Macnee's great delivery.
54	[[/folder]]
55
56	[[folder:Emma Peel era]]
57	* In Emma's very first episode, she has a friendly SwordFight with Steed. He gets soundly beaten when it's all played fairly, so he decides to fight dirty... including giving Emma's butt a tap of his sword when she has her back turned.
58	* From "The Town of No Return", as Steed unties Emma from the saddle:
59	-->'''Emma''': Ow! Tight girth!
60	-->'''Steed''': We'll have to cut down on the oats.
61	* "The Gravediggers":
62	** The episode climaxes with a TraintopBattle - atop a miniature, 1' gauge train.
63	** Behind the scenes example - for the climax, Emma is tied to the railway tracks. During filming, a runner arrived onset with a message that someone wanted Creator/DianaRigg on the telephone. The director quickly replied, "Tell them Miss Rigg is tied up at the moment".
64	** Steed reveals that he wanted to be a train driver, but his family objected.
65	-->'''Steed''': There's no security, always on the move.
66	-->'''Emma''': At least it would have kept you to the straight and narrow.
67	* "The Cybernauts":
68	** Steed examines a shotgun bent out of shape by the Cybernaut: "Whichever way you aim it, you hit the chandelier!"
69	** While Steed is spouting exposition, Emma playfully gives him a dusting with a cloth. And he doesn't notice.
70	** As Steed is leaving for Armstrong's plant:
71	-->'''Steed''': If I'm not back by eleven-thirty, I'll stay for breakfast.
72	-->'''Emma''': You don't eat breakfast.
73	* "The Murder Market":
74	** Emma is describing the perfect match for Steed:
75	-->'''Peel''': A mixture of [[UsefulNotes/TheBorgias Lucrezia Borgia]] and UsefulNotes/JoanOfArc.
76	-->'''Steed''': Sounds like every girl I ever knew.
77	** Steed talks with Emma, while she plays the tuba inbetween sentences. And he (accidentally?) shoots a golf ball into it.
78	** Peel is FakingTheDead and lying in a coffin. Once the villains have left, Steed brings her round by telling her there's a spider on her nose.
79	** Steed gives Emma a bottle of champagne to enjoy while she remains in the coffin, he advises, "Don't get tipsy...We can't have you hiccoughin' in the coffin." When we come back to her, she's drunkenly dancing round the coffin.
80	* "Too Many Christmas Trees":
81	** Touring Steed's bedroom, Emma admires the four-poster and remarks, "I've always rather fancied myself in one of these." Steed: "So have I—I mean, I have, too."
82	** "Who is 'Boofums?'"
83	** When Steed and Emma are on their way to the mirror room and Steed is ruminating about people "poking around in one's inmost thoughts," Emma agrees, then they both stop and stare upwards with frowns, and Steed remarks, "And you can put ''that'' in your crystal ball!"
84	* In "Castle De'ath", Steed and Emma retire to her room to discuss the reason they came to the castle. Emma finds a miniature bagpipe and plays it Steed practices "hopscotch".
85	* "The Master Minds" sees Emma have a conversation with Steed while on a trampoline.
86	-->'''Steed''': Look, do you mind, it's like watching a game of perpendicular tennis!
87	* In "A Surfeit of H₂O", Steed is undercover as a wine merchant.
88	--> "Steed, of Steed, Steed, Steed, Steed, Steed and Jacques, Limited. Wine merchants extraordinary."
89	--> "How did Jacques get in?"
90	--> "He didn't, he doesn't exist. But in the wine trade, you must have that French touch!"
91	** He also explains he's the other four Steeds as well.
92	* In "Death at Bargain Prices," Emma Peel is working undercover as a department store clerk:
93	-->'''Steed:''' I asked the chief predator where to find you and he said, "Our Mrs. Peel is in ladies' underwear." I rattled up the stairs three at a time.
94	** Later in the episode, a knife gets thrown at Steed. He deflects it with a cricket bat - and it hits a dartboard. This prompts a pleased {{Squee}} from him.
95	--> "It's all in the grip."
96	** The very end has him summing up the situation (where the villains had been planning to blow up the department store).
97	--> "We saved them from the biggest closing down sale in history".
98	* "The Hour That Never Was":
99	** The climax has Steed and a villain fighting while under the influence of laughing gas. Then Emma joins in.
100	** The episode ends with Steed and Emma riding on the back of a milk float - until they both realise no-one's driving and leap off, trying to get into the cabin to stop it in fast-motion. It's like a scene from ''Series/TheBennyHillShow''.
101	* In "The Danger Makers," Emma receives a box of chocolates from a suspect in the case, and Steed treats it as if it is a bomb:
102	-->'''Steed:''' (''after carefully opening the box with a knife and tweezers'') Ah, thought so.\
103	'''Mrs. Peel:''' Booby trapped?\
104	'''Steed:''' (''gingerly removing a wrapped piece with the tweezers'') Whatever you do, don't touch the wrapped ones.\
105	'''Mrs. Peel:''' Why not?\
106	'''Steed:''' Because I like them. (''he pops it in his mouth as Emma slams the box shut'')
107	* "The Hour That Never Was":
108	** Steed and Mrs. Peel are forced to walk to a soon to be abandoned RAF base because a dog had run in front of their car, causing Steed to crash:
109	-->'''Steed:''' This stretch of road hasn't changed in years. Cross the bridge, through the trees, across green grassy banks to RAF Station 472 Hamelin. I've driven across this road a hundred times during the war.\
110	'''Mrs. Peel:''' Well, since you know it so well, it's remarkable you couldn't stay on it.
111	**
112	-->'''Steed:''' Returning from a mission, hunched over the controls, eyes rimmed with fatigue, the men groaning in the back.\
113	'''Mrs. Peel:''' Where had you been, the war?\
114	'''Steed:''' No, the local pub.
115	* In "Silent Dust," Steed leaves Mrs. Peel alone at the pub so he can approach a local woman and get some information:
116	-->'''Steed:''' I'll see what I can pick up here.\
117	'''Mrs. Peel:''' I'm sure you'll pick up... something.
118	* "The Hidden Tiger" is full of them, thanks to a generous dose of cat puns.
119	** When Steed is worried the cats will give him away, he whispers "I'll be as quiet as a mouse."
120	** The villains sum the situation up as "cats are going to kill the curious in this case..."
121	** Mrs Peel gets the last one in as the episode ends.
122	--> '''Steed:''' By acting as we did, we narrowly averted a terrible...
123	--> ''He stands in her paint bucket.''
124	--> '''Mrs Peel:''' Catastrophe.
125	** When the cat Mr Cheshire gave her scratches her, Mrs Peel remarks "I think that's grounds for divorce."
126	* "A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Station" has some courtesy of guest star Creator/JohnLaurie:
127	** While trailing Ticket Collector, he opens a compartment and sits in a woman's lap! She's awake and reading a magazine but apparently doesn't even notice!
128	** While watching Mrs Peel fight the villains, he hides behind a seat and eats a biscuit.
129	* In "Murdersville", the dastardly Frederick Williams is about to shoot Samuel Morgan in the library, but then the librarian, Miss Avril, points to the "SILENCE" sign and he slips a silencer on the end of his pistol.
130	[[/folder]]
131
132	[[folder:Tara King era]]
133	* In "The Curious Case of the Countless Clues", the Franchise/SherlockHolmes {{Expy}} falls for the false clues left by the killers, while Steed remains less than convinced.
134	-->'''Steed:''' And clumsy.\
135	'''Sir Arthur Doyle:''' Clumsy?\
136	'''Steed:''' Well look around, they've left everything except their name and address.
137	[[/folder]]

Context Funny / TheAvengers1960s