1 | * "Snatch that cabbage patch!" |
2 | ** "I'm going to headbutt you and knock you out, okay?" |
3 | * "When I get to Heaven, I'm gonna tell ''Jesus'' what you did!" |
4 | * "He's having Shabbat!" |
5 | * "I thought your friend stored athletic equipment here. Because I am looking at a lot of homo stuff right now," |
6 | * "He should be ejected from thith fathility!" |
7 | * "Don't eyeball me, boy. I see your mother driving up and down the street looking at me. I'll be your stepfather by the weekend." |
8 | * "What do we do now?" "Star Sixty-Nine him!" "...You want me to have sex with him?" "Press the star key, press the six, and PRESS THE NINE!" |
9 | * Paul giving Griga's dog his severed toe. |
10 | ** Also Paul barbecuing the severed hands outside on the grill and cheerfully waving to a woman while the graphic "this is still a true story" appears onscreen. |
11 | *** That one's even funnier if you recognize the ActorAllusion. Wonder if they could smell what the Rock was cooking? |
12 | * Paul convincing the store owner that he worked with ''Stryper'' |
13 | -->'''Daniel''': And people say Christian rock sucks. |
14 | -->''beat'' |
15 | -->'''Store Owner''': [[SeriousBusiness Who says that?]] |
16 | -->'''Paul''': Yeah, who? |
17 | -->'''Daniel''': [[OhCrap Uh...]] Assholes, that's who! |
18 | * Lugo and Doorbal trying to return a chainsaw to Home Depot after it gets caught in one of the victims hair. And yes, this DID happen in real life. |
19 | * As the verdicts for the four are being read out at the end of the film, Lugo's reads "SENTENCED TO DEATH (PLUS THIRTY DAYS FOR BEING AN ASSHOLE TO A GUARD)" |
20 | * Paul, after knocking out Victor when he tried to escape, gave this gem: |
21 | --> '''Paul:''' Why'd you make me do that to you, Victor? I have responsibilities! Jesus Christ himself has blessed me with many gifts! [[CrossesTheLineTwice One of them is knocking someone the fuck out!]] |
22 | * (Grabs axe) "I'm going old school." |
23 | * "Baby booties? Asshole!" |
24 | * Doorbal's wife chewing him out about his small penis in court. |
25 | ** "That lady's a whore. Yeah you, you fucking bitch." |
26 | * There's something about the way Creator/EdHarris plays Ed Du Bois that will make you chuckle: a man looking to enjoy impending retirement is being dragged into a case where he is the ''OnlySaneMan'' in perhaps the most literal example of this trope. That, and a DeadpanSnarker. |
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