Line #12 FanFic/WereJerrySpringerNotCasablanca


1	->''He wouldn't say he was a great parent. Hell, even "good" would be a stretch. But they developed like they were supposed to, ate two or three meals a day and had a roof over their heads. He was at least a mediocre dad''
2	-->-- Yondu describing his parenting style
3
4	''we're jerry springer, not casablanca.'' is a ''Film/GuardiansOfTheGalaxy2014'' fanfic by judypoovey.
5
6	The story is set in an [[AlternateUniverseFic AU]], where everyone is human, Yondu has [[BigScrewedUpFamily four adopted children]] and is trying to raise them all without going insane. Things get complicated when he meets Kraglin, a scruffy punk with a neck tattoo. Things get even more complicated when Peter's biological dad comes back for him.
7
8	It is published on Website/ArchiveOfOurOwn, [[https://archiveofourown.org/works/10954233/chapters/24380448 here]].
9
10	!! This fic provides examples of
11	* AbusiveParents: Ego implied to be this for Mantis, as she has almost no social skills and is scared to be around strangers when she first arrives at Yondu's house.
12	* BigScrewedUpFamily: Yondu acknowledges his family as this, describing himself as "at least a mediocre dad"
13	* HandicappedBadass: Nebula has a prosthetic arm and leg, but doesn't hesitate to start a fight with the man who catcalled Mantis.
14	* HugeSchoolgirl: Groot is a male version of this, as at twelve years old he's already at eye level with Yondu.
15	* IWasQuiteAFashionVictim: Invoked by Yondu when Peter sees old photos of Yondu and his friends from [[UsefulNotes/TheEighties The 80s]], which include Yondu with a [[DelinquentHair bright red mohawk]] and a denim vest.
16	* ItsPersonal: Peter snaps and attacks Ego when he learns that [[spoiler: Ego set the fire that killed his mother]].
17	* JerkWithAHeartOfGold: Nebula is abrasive and loud, but stands up for Mantis, and is always kind to her.
18	* ManipulativeBastard: Ego attempts to force Peter into [[spoiler: manufacturing drugs]] by promising that he'll pay for Peter to go to any college he wants.
19	* MissingMom: Peter's mother, who died when Peter was six, and Mantis' mother, who [[spoiler: who died giving birth to Mantis]].
20	* PapaWolf: Yondu becomes this when Mantis gets catcalled, and later again when [[spoiler: Ego attacks Peter, going so far as to hit him with Kraglin's car]].
21	* StraightMan: Drax's girlfriend Hovat is a female example, as she seems to have almost no sense of humour in contrast to the raucous Drax.
22	-->''Drax's girlfriend...was almost hilariously humorless, a foil to Drax's socially stunted bombast''.
23	* VitriolicBestBuds: Yondu and Tullk.
24	-->''It was hard to differentiate between "best" friend and "only" friend, but Tullk was probably both''.
25	* TeenGenius: Rocket is a fourteen year old who is "constantly building weird gadgets and "fixing" things around the house".
26	* TheAllegedCar: Kraglin's car, the trunk is literally held together with a ''paperclip''.
27	* {{Tsundere}}: Nebula, and to a lesser extent, Gamora.
28	* {{Twincest}}: Implied with Ayesha.

Context FanFic / WereJerrySpringerNotCasablanca