History WarpThatAesop / WebOriginal

* ''WebVideo/Local58'':
** Never watch overnight television. Supernatural broadcast signal intrusions went the way of the dinosaurs when TV networks began airing infomercials overnight.
** Want to fill in time on your schedule and don't have any syndicated programming to throw on? Air a classified government film that tells people to commit mass suicide in the event of an invasion!

* ''WebOriginal/WellBeRightBack'':
** If your cable company's experimental [=AI=] gains sentience and runs amuck, causing all kinds of broadcast "anomalies", don't take it offline and order a recall of the cable boxes it controls, just hope it'll stop it eventually!
** Never use a VCR to record television shows. Instances of "broadcast anomalies" declined greatly when they stopped manufacturing them.

* ''Buzzfeed'': Brainless listicles about pop culture are SeriousBusiness.

* ''WebOriginal/WellBeRightBack'': If your cable company's experimental [=AI=] gains sentience and runs amuck, causing all kinds of broadcast "anomalies", don't take it offline and order a recall of the cable boxes it controls, just hope it'll stop it eventually!

** Using art generators makes you an artist of high skill.

** [=rReddit_Island=]:
*** Buying an island (private or government-owned) is ''easy''.
*** If someone claims to own an island, you should believe every word they say.

* ''WebOriginal/WellBeRightBack'': If the [=AI=] running your cable company's services gains sentience and runs amuck, causing all kinds of broadcast "anomalies", don't take it offline, just let it continue doing what it's doing and hope it'll stop it eventually!

* ''WebOriginal/WellBeRightBack'': If the [=AI=] running your cable company's services gains sentience and runs amuck, don't take it offline, just let it continue doing what it's doing and hope it'll stop it eventually!

* WebOriginal/WellBeRightBack: If the [=AI=] running your cable company's services gains sentience and runs amuck, don't take it offline, just let it continue doing what it's doing and hope it'll stop it eventually!

** [=rDrama=]: Intentionally spreading misinformation is funny.
** [=rAMA=]:

** Any long term fan who dislikes when a content creator loses all interest in what they’re doing, hires a team to write their scripts for them, and [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking starts to go bald]] is merely a {{Troll}} who wants the creator to suffer.
*** Baldness is the sign of drop in quality.

** "Turning Red" review: When you want to make an animated PeriodPiece, make sure the art style ''perfectly'' reflects the time period, or no one will know when your cartoon is supposed to take place.

* YoutubePoop: Nonsensical ToiletHumour, {{Overused Running Gag}}s, vulgar language, [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking and copyright infringement]] are ''hysterical.''

** [=Decadeology=]: The best indicators of worldwide cultural shifts are not world events like the fall of the Soviet Union or the Iraq War, but things like the debut of a new game console or Cartoon Network changing their logo.

*** There's nothing wrong about [[BigBrotherIsWatchingYou governments and corporations abusing tech to [[ParanoiaFuel punish anyone for literally anything]]. Everyone (with [[OriginalPositionFallacy the sole exception of me]] of course) who has had their social media accounts banned, their privacy violated, their bank accounts frozen, etc. deserves it.

*** There's nothing wrong about [[BigBrotherIsWatchingYou governments and corporations abusing tech to punish]] [[ParanoiaFuel literally anyone for anything]] (or even [[ForTheEvulz nothing at all]]). Anyone who has their social media accounts banned, their privacy violated, their bank accounts frozen, etc. deserves it. Unless if [[OriginalPositionFallacy it's me of course]]).

*** Cartoons are [[AnimationAgeGhetto frivolous nonsense aimed at kids]] and it's SeriousBusiness to [[{{Irony}} say otherwise]]!
*** [[NeverLiveItDown Never live down]] someone’s fuck ups; no matter how long it’s been or whether or not they admits they were wrong.
*** It is perfectly okay for a show to [[ButtMonkey torture its characters]]. In fact, tormenting people in real life is perfectly okay if [[TheSociopath you and others]] [[ItAmusedMe finds it funny]].

*** All [[AllMenArePerverts men really DO want sex]] all the time. If they don't, then there is something genuinely and terribly wrong with them. Asexual? [[EskimosArentReal What are those?]]
*** All [[WesternAnimation/TurningRed period pieces]] should ignore ''absolutely everything'' the fact that it’s a period piece.
*** There is nothing wrong about governments and corporations abusing their power to punish literally anyone for anything (or even [[ForTheEvulz nothing at all]]). Those people deserve to have social media accounts banned, their bank accounts frozen, etc.
*** It’s okay for a woman stalk a man. Especially if that man has [[DisproportionateRetribution opinions on cartoons you don’t like]] and [[RunningGag because it’s funny]].

** Naïve, impulsive teen girls make excellent combat leaders.
** Having your family terrorized by an extremist subculture perfectly excuses you to blatantly scorn all members of that culture.
*** But don't worry, it's fine to be racist if that racism actually stemmed from daddy issues.
** If you sense an incoming threat to your people, don't bother asking your teammates for help. They obviously wouldn't understand or care, anyways. When they do offer their help, and express concern for your lack of self-preservation, indignantly blow them off and express disdain for their having the audacity to care about your well-being.
** The best way for an underage girl to get a bartender's aid in finding someone is to [[GroinAttack physically assault them]] and destroy their bar if they suspect you. And just for fun, goad them into getting close enough to you so that you can attack them again.
*** If your friend's lifestyle is heading towards the self-destructive, a sob story about your [[DarkAndTroubledPast past]], an AngerBornOfWorry-powered assault, and a hug will surely make them come to their senses. And by coming to their senses, that means they'll allow you to drag them off to a school dance instead of making sure they get the rest they desperately need.
** Bully who clearly overpowers you, and has assaulted and manipulated you many times? Throw a jar of jam at them, and before they get to really retaliate, the opportunity to prove that you're the real man will surely arise.
** It's perfectly sensible to [[RecruitTeenagersWithAttitude place the fate of the world in the hands of troubled teenager]]s (though this may be a young adult media thing in general).
** PTSD can be solved through [[MurderIsTheBestSolution murder]] and/or [[HeroicSuicide suicide]].
** Trust is for losers, betrayal is awesome!
** Sacrificing part of your body to stop a threat does not count as a HeroicSacrifice and in fact is just a symbol of you losing your humanity.