History Recap / AFeastForCrows

Tommen complains that he wants to sit on the Iron Throne and attend Council meetings, and Cersei accurately divines that he was encouraged to demand these by Margaery. She tells Tommen he must wait until he’s older, and thinks to herself that she will not let Margaery cheat her of her "hour in the sun." She turns away a representative from the Iron Bank, telling him that the crown's debts to that financial institution are on hold until she says otherwise. She is pleased to hear that Wyman Manderly has executed Davos Seaworth, called "Onion Knight," and orders his son Wylis surrendered back to him. She is less pleasd to hear that Osney Kettleblack has had no success at seducing Margaery -- she actually seems attracted to him, but they are ''constantly'' surrounded by others. And she is infuriated to find Tommen training at jousting under the Knight of Flowers. Once again, this was Margaery's idea, and while all those gathered are cheering the young king's fledgling ability, Cersei agrees by saying, "One day you shall rule the lists, as your father did." Margaery astutely catches this and asks what tourneys King Robert had won. (None, Jaime, however...) The Queen Regent evades this by mentioning Robert's deeds at the Trident. She then berates Loras for teaching Tommen how to ride, but the Kingsguard insists that Tommen wants to learn (at his age, he should be a squire) and reminds her that there has been no master-at-arms at the Red Keep since Aron Santagar was killed. Walking back to her solar, she considers sending for another Dornish master-at-arms, just to irk the Tyrells. Lord Qyburn reports to her about the Free Cities and the slave revolt in Astapor spreading to Meereen, but Cersei is not interested in any of it. He also mentions that in Dorne, the young daughter of the Knight of Spottswood (Spotted Sylva) has suddenly wed the elderly Lord Estermont, who are kin to her through Robert, and Daemon Sand imprisoned. Cersei doesn't make the connection that they are friends to Princess Arianne until Qyburn points ''that'' out too. He also tells her about a treasonous puppet show being shown in the streets, and, after Cersei orders their arrests, asks if the female puppeteer can be submitted to him, as he has "exhausted" the previous girl (Senelle the maid) Cersei loaned him. Jaime and Tommen invade her bath, and Tommen demands Loras for his training. Cersei tells Tommen he must wait until she appoints a new master-at-arms, but Tommen stubbornly insists. He also wants a kitten, and to not have to eat beets. Cersei is angered when Jaime only finds Tommen's defiance amusing. She -- [[FullFrontalAssault still in her bath]] -- tells Tommen that he is a foolish little boy, and Ser Loras has more important things to do than train him. Tearfully, Tommen backs down and leaves, though not before declaring, "When I'm king, I'm going to outlaw beets." Jaime asks her if she is "drunk, or merely stupid" to reject Loras as master-at-arms, and laughs at her assertion that Ser Osmund is even in his league. Finally alone to dress, Cersei reflects on how the washerwomen have shrunk her dresses; [[SelectiveObliviousness it couldn't possibly be]] weight gain from excessive drinking. She has dinner with Lady Falyse and Ser Balman, Lady Tanda's son. She commiserates with Balman about Lady Tanda's tragic riding accident, which she is unlikely to long survive, and reassures them she does not blame them for Lollys's husband's decision to name her child Tyrion. She claims that Ser Bronn is still loyal to the Imp and working against her, and manipulates them into promising that they will arrange for Bronn to [[MakeItLookLikeAnAccident have an accident]]. She finds Tommen sleeping with three black kittens, which Meryn Trant tells her Margaery gave him in what Cersei mentally describes as the world's most blatant attempt at {{Manipulative Bastard}}ry. She remembers how Mad King Aerys had a falling-out with her father, and had therefore rejected his suit to have Cersei marry Rhaegar. She remembers how happy she had been when she had thought it would happen, and thinks that her elation had made her see Maggy the Frog. She believes her father's failure to deliver on the betrothal is what made Maggy's curse on her come true.

* Should the crown ally with the ironborn? This would be difficult due to the SuccessionCrisis resulting from Lord Balon Greyjoy's death. Cersei is not interested, declaring that their time will come, once the crown has its own fleet. Lord Rosby's IncurableCoughOfDeath makes it hard for him to protest that the crown has no ''funds'', but Cersei decides to defer the crown's debts to the Faith, as well as to the Iron Bank of Braavos. Pycelle protests that bit strongly, warning it's not a good idea to piss off the [[MorallyAmbiguousBanker Iron Bank]] but is overruled.

Lord Tywin Lannister's body is heading back to Casterly Rock in state. Jaime rides out to see it off, as well as Ser Kevan, who is heading out to Darry. He cautions against trying to hunt down Sandor Clegane, who supposedly led a vicious raid at Saltpans recently, but Kevan is uninterested in that business. Jaime tries one last time to settle his uncle's feud with Cersei, but Kevan is not interested in compromise: "Tell her that, [[IKnowYouKnowIKnow the next time you are in her bedchamber]]." Jaime, watching him leave, wonders if Cersei would be so mad as to have him assassinated -- and whether setting him against the Hound is a UriahGambit. In the yard, he watches Ser Loras trounce everyone at jousting ("Jousting is three-quarters horsemanship") before heading up to find Cersei, rather drunk, laughing with Pycelle and Lady Taena Merrywether. They have received news that Lollys Stokeworth, raped in the riot nine months ago, has delivered a healthy baby boy... which her new husband, Ser Bronn of the Blackwater, has given perhaps the most politically-insensitive name in the realm: "Tyrion." Cersei jokes about gifting the boy "a new stepfather" for his nameday, and Jaime notes that she looks [[SexIsViolence aroused]] by the idea -- reminding him of how the Mad King would always visit his wife, [[DomesticAbuse often violently]], after having someone burned alive.[[note]]Jaime and Ser Jonothor Darry had the guard of the queen's bedchamber the night after Lord Chelsted, erstwhile Hand of the King, was executed. When Jaime said that they were sworn to protect her too, Ser Jonothor replied, "We are, [[MaritalRapeLicense but not from him]]."[[/note]] Once he gets her alone, Jaime asks why she is keeping the Tyrells' bought-and-paid-for spy near her; Cersei retorts that Taena is a DoubleAgent now, since Cersei can do so much more for her than can Queen Margaery. She is thinking about having her husband, Lord Orton Merrywether, installed as her Hand, or perhaps Wisdom Hallyne the pyromancer; they will be weak Hands, it's true, but Cersei is sure she'll be strong enough for the both of them. He also asks if she truly intends to name Aurane Waters (inexperienced but {{bishonen}}) as Master of Ships, even though Lord Paxter Redwyne is admiral of the biggest and longest-lived fleet in the Seven Kingdoms -- Cersei protests that he is a Tyrell, sworn to the Reach. Jaime realizes that she is bent on alienating her friends and surrounding herself with {{Sycophantic Servant}}s: "''The [[TitleDrop crows will feast]] upon us all if you go on this way, sweet sister.''" That evening, Ser Loras finds him perusing the White Book. Loras has [[AntiIntellectualism no use for books]], claiming that history will remember the heroes -- and villains -- either way, but Jaime asks him about those who were [[GrayAndGreyMorality a little of both]], like the one he is reading about now.

As the bells toll for the High Septon's death in his sleep, Cersei holds audience with three ruffians who have brought her a dwarf's head, claiming it's Tyrion's. It's not -- for instance, it has a nose -- and the three men begin arguing amongst themselves about how the dwarf claims he was a sparrow.[[note]]The head's description matches that of the dwarf priest Brienne met in her second chapter.[[/note]] After, Cersei walks to her first small council meeting with Qyburn, who is now her [[TheSpymaster master of whisperers]] and who has prepared "the skull" properly for shipment to Lord Doran Martell. Grand Maester Pycelle almost blows a gasket when he sees Qyburn -- a member of his order, remember, if defrocked -- but Cersei manages to shut him down. To inaugurate her reign, she has given everyone new titles: Orton Merrywether has become her justiciar, Gyles Rosby has indeed taken Tyrion's role as lord treasurer, Aurane Waters is her grand admiral, and her Hand is Ser Harys Swyft, [[IHaveYourWife Ser Kevan's father-in-law]]. Since neither King Tommen nor Lord Commander of the Kingsguard Jaime Lannister will be attending, they get to work:

* Should the crown ally with the ironborn? This would be difficult due to the SuccessionCrisis resulting from Lord Balon Greyjoy's death. Cersei is not interested, declaring that their time will come, once the crown has its own fleet. Lord Rosby's IncurableCoughOfDeath makes it hard for him to protest that the crown has no ''funds'', but Cersei decides to defer the crown's debts to the Faith, as well as to the Iron Bank of Braavos. Pycelle protests that bit strongly, but is overruled.
* Should someone take the fall for the Red Wedding? It would give the Late Lord Walder's heir a chance to rid himself of some pesky relatives. No decision is made.
* Lord Wyman Manderly of White Harbor writes that he has taken Ser Davos Seaworth captive, after the Onion Knight was sent to treat with the North, and hopes to earn the crown's favor. Cersei orders him to have Ser Davos executed.

* Stannis is reportedly in league with Night's Watch on the Wall, and is trying to treat with the wildlings too. While the council mostly suggests no longer sending criminals to reinforce the ArmyOfThievesAndWhores, Qyburn suggests sending 100 men -- thereby to disguise assassins tasked with killing Jon Snow. Cersei declares she can arrange that.

* Erik Ironmaker might have made a great king... sixty years ago. Today he's 90 and overweight. Asha shuts down his claim by asking him to stand up.

* ...until Asha interrupts. She claims that she comes first in the line of succession, and does not plan to follow in the footsteps of her father -- a GeneralFailure who led ''two'' unsuccessful rebellions, got all his sons killed, and has gained the fruits of the North: her loot is pinecones, pebbles from the Stony Shore. Nothing useful. Instead of war, she promises the ironborn peace, an alliance with the North, and a chance to farm and grow honestly instead of living on whatever they can steal. Aeron is astonished at how many chant their support for her; but just as many want Victarion, and the kingsmoot is about to turn violent when

* It's a horn, with Valyrian runes, being blown by one of Euron's men, and the runes are glowing

* and the sound goes on and on and seems to drown the world

Princess Arianne Martell is at an an oasis in the desert with several companions -- Andrey Dalt, Sylva Santagar and Garin of the Greenblood, all of whom she trusts implicitly; and Gerold Dayne the Darkstar, whom she does not -- awaiting the arrival of Princess Myrcella Baratheon and Ser Arys Oakheart. Darkstar does a poor job of appearing trustworthy by pointing out that, while crowning Myrcella might start the Lannister-Martell war Arianne has been scheming towards, [[WouldHitAGirl murdering her]] is a more guaranteed solution. When Princess Myrcella arrives, Gerold Dayne is the only one she has any clue about, mostly because everyone knows the name of his cousin Ser Arthur Dayne (which Gerold is [[OvershadowedByAwesome irritated about]]). Privily, Ser Arys tells her the news that Lord Tywin Lannister is dead, and asks to know the rest of the plan: crown Myrcella, [[TheCoup take her father's place]]... StepThreeProfit? Arianne laughs and leads the way, letting Garin explain his culture to Myrcella[[note]]The First Men and the Andals are not the only population who have migrated to Westeros over the millenia. About a thousand years ago, the Freehold of Valyria came in conflict with the Rhoynish, a loose confederation of people united because they all lived on the River Rhoyne, which runs southeast from almost the northwest tip of Essos. Valyria was the world's only superpower on account of its dragons, so this war went as one would expect. Queen Nymeria the WarriorPrincess -- yes, the one Arya named her direwolf after -- organized the survivors into a flotilla of 10,000 ships and [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere departed Essos entirely]], arriving, after years of wandering, at the Greenblood, a (much smaller) river at the tip of the Dornish peninsula. Most of the Rhoynish assimilated, especially after an ArrangedMarriage between Queen Nymeria and King Mors Martell; but a few, still empathizing with their ancestors, kept the old ways, plying the river as their ancestors did in days of old. These are the so-called "orphans of the Greenblood."[[/note]] and how his riverboat friends will assist them. But when they arrive at the river, Captain Areo Hotah is who greets them. He calls for them to yield. Arianne suggests they flee. But Ser Arys, that KnightInShiningArmor, [[LeeroyJenkins charges in alone]] to protect his princesses. [[OffWithHisHead he fails]]. Arianne vomits overside, noticing Myrcella on her knees, clutching at her own head, blood streaming down her arms. Arianne, betrayed, asks Captain Hotah how her plans were leaked, and the captain replied, "Someone told. Someone always tells."

Tommen complains that he wants to sit on the Iron Throne and attend Council meetings, and Cersei accurately divines that he was encouraged to demand these by Margaery. She tells Tommen he must wait until he’s older, and thinks to herself that she will not let Margaery cheat her of her "hour in the sun." She turns away a representative from the Iron Bank, telling him that the crown's debts to that financial institution are on hold until she says otherwise. She is pleased to hear that Wyman Manderly has executed Davos Seaworth, called "Onion Knight," and orders his son Wylis surrendered back to him. She is less pleasd to hear that Osney Kettleblack has had no success at seducing Margaery -- she actually seems attracted to him, but they are ''constantly'' surrounded by others. And she is infuriated to find Tommen training at jousting under the Knight of Flowers. Once again, this was Margaery's idea, and while all those gathered are cheering the young king's fledgling ability, Cersei agrees by saying, "One day you shall rule the lists, as your father did." Margaery astutely catches this and asks what tourneys King Robert had won. (None, Jaime, however...) The Queen Regent evades this by mentioning Robert's deeds at the Trident. She then berates Loras for teaching Tommen how to ride, but the Kingsguard reminds her that there has been no master-at-arms at the Red Keep since Aron Santagar was killed. Walking back to her solar, she considers sending for another Dornish master-at-arms, just to irk the Tyrells. Lord Qyburn reports to her about the Free Cities and the slave revolt in Astapor spreading to Meereen, but Cersei is not interested in any of it. He also mentions that in Dorne, the young daughter of the Knight of Spottswood (Spotted Sylva) has suddenly wed the elderly Lord Estermont, who are kin to her through Robert, and Daemon Sand imprisoned. Cersei doesn't make the connection that they are friends to Princess Arianne until Qyburn points ''that'' out too. He also tells her about a treasonous puppet show being shown in the streets, and, after Cersei orders their arrests, asks if the female puppeteer can be submitted to him, as he has "exhausted" the previous girl (Senelle the maid) Cersei loaned him. Jaime and Tommen invade her bath, and Tommen demands Loras for his training. Cersei tells Tommen he must wait until she appoints a new master-at-arms, but Tommen stubbornly insists. He also wants a kitten, and to not have to eat beets. Cersei is angered when Jaime only finds Tommen's defiance amusing. She -- [[FullFrontalAssault still in her bath]] -- tells Tommen that he is a foolish little boy, and Ser Loras has more important things to do than train him. Tearfully, Tommen backs down and leaves, though not before declaring, "When I'm king, I'm going to outlaw beets." Jaime asks her if she is "drunk, or merely stupid" to reject Loras as master-at-arms, and laughs at her assertion that Ser Osmund is even in his league. Finally alone to dress, Cersei reflects on how the washerwomen have shrunk her dresses; [[SelectiveObliviousness it couldn't possibly be]] weight gain from excessive drinking. She has dinner with Lady Falyse and Ser Balman, Lady Tanda's son. She commiserates with Balman about Lady Tanda's tragic riding accident, which she is unlikely to long survive, and reassures them she does not blame them for Lollys's husband's decision to name her child Tyrion. She claims that Ser Bronn is still loyal to the Imp and working against her, and manipulates them into promising that they will arrange for Bronn to [[MakeItLookLikeAnAccident have an accident]]. She finds Tommen sleeping with three black kittens, which Meryn Trant tells her Margaery gave him in what Cersei mentally describes as the world's most blatant attempt at {{Manipulative Bastard}}ry. She remembers how Mad King Aerys had a falling-out with her father, and had therefore rejected his suit to have Cersei marry Rhaegar. She remembers how happy she had been when she had thought it would happen, and thinks that her elation had made her see Maggy the Frog. She believes her father's failure to deliver on the betrothal is what made Maggy's curse on her come true.

Princess Arianne Martell is at an an oasis in the desert with several companions -- Andrey Dalt, Sylva Santagar and Garin of the Greenblood, all of whom she trusts implicitly; and Gerold Dayne the Darkstar, whom she does not -- awaiting the arrival of Princess Myrcella Baratheon and Ser Arys Oakheart. Darkstar does a poor job of appearing trustworthy by pointing out that, while crowning Myrcella might start the Lannister-Martell war Arianne has been scheming towards, [[WouldHitAGirl murdering her]] is a more guaranteed solution. When Princess Myrcella arrives, Gerold Dayne is the only one she has any clue about, mostly because everyone knows the name of his cousin Ser Arthur Dayne (which Gerold is [[OvershadowedByAwesome irritated about]]). Privily, Ser Arys tells her the news that Lord Tywin Lannister is dead, and asks to know the rest of the plan: crown Myrcella, [[TheCoup take her father's place]]... StepThreeProfit? Arianne laughs and leads the way, letting Garin explain his culture to Myrcella[[note]]The First Men and the Andals are not the only population who have migrated to Westeros over the millenia. About a thousand years ago, the Freehold of Valyria came in conflict with the Rhoynish, a loose confederation of people united because they all lived on the River Rhoyne, which runs southeast from almost the northwest tip of Essos. Valyria was the world's only superpower on account of its dragons, so this war went as one would expect. Queen Nymeria the WarriorPrincess -- yes, the one Arya named her direwolf after -- organized the survivors into a flotilla of 10,000 ships and [[ScrewThisImOuttaHere departed Essos entirely]], arriving, after years of wandering, at the Greenblood, a (much smaller) river at the tip of the Dornish peninsula. Most of the Rhoynish assimilated, especially after an ArrangedMarriage between Queen Nymeria and King Mors Martell; but a few, still empathizing with their ancestors, kept the old ways, plying the river as their ancestors did in days of old. These are the so-called "orphans of the Greenblood."[[/note]] and how his riverboat friends will assist them. But when they arrive at the river, Captain Areo Hotah is who greets them. He calls for them to yield. Arianne suggests they flee. But Ser Arys, that KnightInShiningArmor, [[LeeroyJenkins charges in alone]] to protect his princesses. [[OffWithHisHead he fails]]. Arianne vomits overside, noticing Myrcella on her knees, clutching at her own head, blood streaming down her arms. Arianne, betrayed, asks Captain Hotah how her plans were leaked, and the captain replied, "Someone told. Someone always tells."

At the Water Gardens, House Martell's private retreat, Prince Doran has lived for two years; the temperate climate agrees with his gout, and he gets to watch children at play.[[note]]Prince Maron Martell had the Water Gardens built as a gift for his new bride, Daenerys Targaryen, when they wed over a century ago in the ArrangedMarriage that, officially, brought Dorne under the jurisdiction of the Iron Throne. It was her idea to host children there, letting them splash in the pools; it is the only place on the continent where no distinction is drawn between high- and lowborn.[[/note]] His captain of the guards, Areo Hotah, stops Prince Doran by being interrupted by the [[InSeriesNickname Sand Snakes]], LiteralBastard daughters of the Red Viper. At the Water Gardens, and as they return to Sunspear, Hotah runs interference as Obara, and then Nymeria, and finally Tyene all approach Prince Doran to beg vengeance for their father. They all want different things: Obara to burn Oldtown to the ground, Lady Nym to assassinate Cersei and the other Lannisters, Tyene to carry through the ArrangedMarriage between Prince Trystane and Princess Myrcella to lure the Lannisters into attacking. Prince Doran tells them all to hold their anger in abeyance, as he will not move until he is ready. To ensure this, he orders his daughter Arianne to have all the Sand Snakes arrested, including the youngest ones who will stay at the Water Gardens with their mother Ellaria. Hotah reminds him that all Dorne will howl, but Prince Doran merely sighs and hopes Tywin Lannister hears it: "so he might know what a loyal friend he has in Sunspear."

Victarion was hesitant to leave Moat Cailin for the kingsmoot, but was compelled to when news of Euron's arrival came in. He and Aeron Damphair agree that "No godless man" (IE Euron) "may sit the Seastone Chair," but that does not solve the problem of who will actually get it: Aeron was clearly trying to legitimize Victarion himself as Balon's successor, but this leaves the question of Asha -- who, under the HeirClubForMen rules, ''does'' trump Victarion depite her lack of penis.[[note]]The order is, "Father, firstborn son, grandson, granddaughter, then second-born son."[[/note]] Victarion also made ThePromise to Balon to not kill Euron, which he [[HonorBeforeReason intends to keep]]. At the feast that night, Euron makes a fine showing, earning the loyalty of several captains with his braggadocio and TestosteronePoisoning. Victarion and Asha discuss privily. She asks why Euron was banished by Balon three years ago, which he refused to speak of, and wonders if it has anything to do with the death of Victarion's third wife. Victarion claims she was only a "salt wife"[[note]]a concubine, as opposed to a "rock wife" who is ironborn[[/note]], but admits internally that he has [[TheLostLenore not touched a woman since]]. He points out how hard Asha will find it to break into the HeirClubForMen, WarriorPrincess or not, and Asha offers to support her uncle if he will name her Hand of the King. (That office does not exist in the ironborn heirarchy.) Finally Victarion spills the truth: he loved his salt wife dearly, but Euron... Well, the truth is muddled, but at the end of it the woman was pregnant. Victarion, {{cuckold}}ed, was compelled by [[TestosteronePoisoning ironborn tradition]] to [[WhyDidYouMakeMeHitYou murder her]]. Thereafter Balon banished Euron to prevent a case of [[KinslayingIsASpecialKindOfEvil kinslaying]]. Asha, [[OnlySaneMan sensibly]], decides to stick to her own claim.

Aeron emerges from the sea, reminding himself that he was reborn stronger than before. The kingsmoot is today; various claimants will come forward and give gifts to show their prowess, and it will only end when someone is elected by majority vote. Aeron hopes Euron will misplay by losing his patience and going first, because the first one ''always'' loses, but it doesn't work out that way.

* [[HellIsThatNoise AAROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO]]

* [[HellIsThatNoise OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO]]

* [[HellIsThatNoise OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo...]]
* until finally, into the ringing silence (during which his man keels over, his lips burnt and blistering), Euron Crow's Eye makes his claim.

As the ironborn rush to elect their king, Aeron tries to find the voice of the Drowned God and hears nothing except the scream of a rusted iron hinge.

* The crown are not long on Stannis's chances, as he is facing Lord Roose Bolton's army (once the Bastard of Bolton takes the Neck from the north) as well as whatever force Ramsay might have at his disposal. Additionally, Ramsay is to wed Arya Stark, whom the Lannisters are returning to them, which will further cement the alliance. (She does not mention that the girl pretending to be Arya is a "[[ChekhovsMIA steward's whelp]]" that Littlefinger found.)

* [[HellIsThatNoise AAROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO]]]]

* [[HellIsThatNoise OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO]]]]

* [[HellIsThatNoise OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo...]]]]

* [[AC:[[HellIsThatNoise AAROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO]]]]

* [[AC:[[HellIsThatNoise OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO]]]]

* [[AC:[[HellIsThatNoise OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo...]]]]

* The crown are not long on Stannis's chances, as he is facing Lord Roose Bolton's army (once the Bastard of Bolton takes the Neck from the north) as well as whatever force Ramsay might have at his disposal. Additionally, Ramsay is to wed Arya Stark, whom the Lannisters are returning to them, which will further cement the alliance. (She does not mention that the girl pretending to be Arya is a "steward's whelp" that Littlefinger found.)

In her chambers, she meets with Ser Osney Kettleblack, promising him Kingsguard whites ([[FemmeFatale and her body]]) if he will do something for her. First, he needs to seduce Margaery Tyrell, so that Cersei has pretext for arresting her. Then he will be ReassignedToAntarctica, where he is to put an end to Ned Stark's bastard. He would then be rewarded with a lordship ([[FemmeFatale and her body]]). Ser Osney, though hesitant, agrees.

* Should the crown attempt to intervene while the Faith elects a new High Septon? Cersei is too distracted by Aurane Waters to notice. She finally declares that she does not care, so long as the new one will condemn Tyrion.

Duskendale shows the ravages of the northern attack; its gates are closed for the night, and in the morning she sees merchants selling off arms and armor looted from the dead, some bearing coats of arms she recognizes. When a second person in a row mentions the Lothston black bat on her shield as being an ill omen, she decides to get the shield repainted, asking for a coat she remembers seeing in her father's armory: a green shooting star above an elm tree.[[note]]This is a ShoutOut to the "Dunk and Egg" prequels: these arms were commissioned by the hedge knight Duncan the Tall in 209 AC. When GRRM announced that one of Dunk's descendents would feature in this novel, a large body of speculation that Brienne is his descendent sprang up almost overnight.[[/note]] Lord Benfred Rykker of Dun Fort cannot meet with her as he is in the field with Lord Randyll Tarly, but his castellan, Ser Rufus Leek, tells her that they have seen no sign of Dontos Hollard since he was taken away after [[InfoDump the Defiance of Duskendale]].[[note]]In 277 AC, Lord Denys Darklyn of Duskendale refused to pay taxes to the Mad King Aerys. Duskendale had once been an affluent port on Blackwater Bay, but King's Landing had eclipsed it, leading to an economic decline. Darklyn accompanied his rebellion with an invitation that Aerys come personally to hear their complaints. Lord Tywin Lannister, Hand of the King, told Aerys what a bad idea this was, but a rift was already growing between the two, and Aerys, seeking to demonstrate that he would be fine without his HypercompetentSidekick, went. It was a trap: the king was held captive, and his sworn shield Ser Gwayne Gaunt killed by House Darklyn's retainers, House Hollard. Lord Tywin came and laid siege at once, but Lord Denys threatened to kill the king if any hostilities were launched. A half-year-old MexicanStandoff finally came to an end when Ser Barristan the Bold offered to perform a StealthMission and bring the king out. [[BadassNormal He succeeded.]] Thereafter Aerys had every Darklyn and Hollard [[KillEmAll put to death]]; the only survivor was the teenaged Dontos, whom Barristan interceded for personally. Still, [[NothingIsTheSameAnymore Nothing Was The Same Anymore]]; Aerys's delicate balance between paranoia and sanity was shattered, becoming the Mad King in truth as well as name.[[/note]] Brienne runs into a boy with a sty on his eye she thinks she's seen before, back at Rosby, but he flees. At an inn, a dwarf septon mentions a man named "Nimble Dick," who claims he "fooled a fool" into taking ship; Brienne decides to pursue this lead. The next day, she determines that she is definitely being followed by the boy... who admits himself to be Podrick Payne -- Tyrion's squire, [[UndyingLoyalty loyal until the end]], desperate to find his master and hoping Brienne will lead him to the Imp.

-->--Creator/GeorgeRRMartin, ''Literature/AFeastForCrows'', pg.337 (paperback)

Lord Tywin Lannister's body is heading back to Casterly Rock in state. Jaime rides out to see it off, as well as Ser Kevan, who is heading out to Darry. He cautions against trying to hunt down Sandor Clegane, who supposedly led a vicious raid at Saltpans recently, but Kevan is uninterested in that business. Jaime tries one last time to settle his uncle's feud with Cersei, but Kevan is not interested in compromise: "Tell her that, [[IKnowYouKnowIKnow the next time you are in her bedchamber]]." Jaime, watching him leave, wonders if Cersei would be so mad as to have him assassinated -- and whether setting him against the Hound is a UriahGambit. In the yard, he watches Ser Loras trounce everyone at jousting ("Jousting is three-quarters horsemanship") before heading up to find Cersei, rather drunk, laughing with Pycelle and Lady Taena Merrywether. They have received news that Lollys Stokeworth, raped in the riot nine months ago, has delivered a healthy baby boy... which her new husband, Ser Bronn of the Blackwater, has given perhaps the most politically-insensitive name in the realm: "Tyrion." Cersei jokes about gifting the boy "a new stepfather" for his nameday, and Jaime notes that she looks [[SexIsViolence aroused]] by the idea -- reminding him of how the Mad King would always visit his wife, [[DomesticAbuse often violently]], after having someone burned alive.[[note]]Jaime and Ser Jonothor Darry had the guard of the queen's bedchamber the night after Lord Chelsted, erstwhile Hand of the King, was executed. When Jaime said that they were sworn to protect her too, Ser Jonothor replied, "We are, [[MaritalRapeLicense but not from him]]."[[/note]] Once he gets her alone, Jaime asks why she is keeping the Tyrells' bought-and-paid-for spy near her; Cersei retorts that Taena is a DoubleAgent now, since Cersei can do so much more for her than can Queen Margaery. She is thinking about having her husband, Lord Orton Merrywether, installed as her Hand, or perhaps Wisdom Hallyne the pyromancer; they will be weak Hands, it's true, but Cersei is sure she'll be strong enough for the both of them. He also asks if she truly intends to name Aurane Waters (inexperienced but {{bishonen}}) as Master of Ships, even though Lord Paxter Redwyne is admiral of the biggest and longest-lived fleet in the Seven Kingdoms -- Cersei protests that he is a Tyrell, sworn to the Reach. Jaime realizes that she is bent on alienating her friends and surrounding herself with {{Sycophantic Servant}}s: "''The [[TitleDrop crows will feast]] upon us all if you go on this way, sweet sister.''" That evening, Ser Loras finds him perusing the White Book. Loras has [[AntiIntellectualism no use for books]], claiming that history will remember the heroes -- and villains -- either way, but Jaime asks him about those who were [[GrayAndGreyMorality]], like the one he is reading about now.

Ser Arys Oakheart, sworn brother of the [[PraetorianGuard Kingsguard]], is on his way to meet a woman. He must wear Dornish robes instead of his whites, as all of Sunspear is a-fervor after the Sand Snakes' imprisonment. He also feels guilty for leaving Princess Myrcella alone, but reasons that she is well-protected with her fiancé Prince Trystane for company (and will [[PerfectlyArrangedMarriage scarcely notice Arys' absence anyhow]]). Soon they will all be off to the Water Gardens, where they ought to be safe -- especially since Prince Doran has asked Arys not to tell anyone that they are leaving. When he arrives at the meeting-place, he plans to turn her down and reinforce his VowOfCelibacy... but [[DiamondsInTheBuff all she's wearing is a snake bracelet]], with nothing to cover her RegalRinglets or [[BuxomIsBetter considerable charms]], and [[ImAManICantHelpIt lust overwhelms him]], leaving him sated, satisfied and knowing that if he died right now, he would die happy. ...But he keeps living, and guilt sets in. He says that this must be the last time, and the woman points out that he's said that before, and that true love would never say that. When confronted with his vows, she points out that Arys is empirically ''not'' the first white sword to break that particular vow -- Ser Lucamore the Lusty is in the history books, after all.[[note]]16 children. No, you read that right. King Jaehaerys I had him take the black -- after having him [[CripplingCastration gelded]].[[/note]] The woman then moves on to her political argument: Arys's masters have been horrible people. (He thinks on how he [[WouldHitAGirl punched Sansa]] on Joffrey's orders -- though both in this chapter and in Sansa's prior narration it has been established that he would do so as lightly as possible; and the memories fill him with guilt today.) Wouldn't Myrcella make a better ruler than Tommen?, the woman asks, and Arys must admit that she would. So the woman -- Arianne Martell, Princess of Dorne, Prince Doran's eldest daughter and heir-apparent to Sunspear -- makes her play. Arys reflects ruefully on Lord Commander of the Kingsguard Ser Criston Cole, called Kingmaker -- who disinherited Princess Rhaenyra, Viserys I's intended heir, in favor of her younger brother Aegon II, setting off the SuccessionCrisis today called "the Dance of the Dragons." But his concern is no match for Arianne's own pathos: when she was younger, she found a letter written by her father that told her younger brother Quentyn that ''he'' would rule Dorne, [[TheUnfavorite not Arianne]], in Doran's stead. Arys has ''two'' princesses with a common cause, now. [[FemmeFatale Will he defend them?]] And Arys, that KnightInShiningArmor, agrees.

Sam is trying his best to keep both Gilly and himself calm during the tumultuous sea trip to Braavos. The ''Blackbird'' will take them only so far as Braavos, where Sam will need to lead the party to Oldtown. Sam is hopeful that the others will find happiness when they reach their destination -- Gilly and the babe at Horn Hill, Maester Aemon back at the Citadel, and Dareon in his new role as a recruiter -- but is sure he will hate being a maester. Aemon tells them the story of his sea trip to the Wall: he traveled with Lord Commander Duncan the Tall as his honor guard, along with Brynden Rivers, Lord Bloodraven himself, who was sent by "Egg" (Aegon V Targaryen, called "[[SpareToTheThrone The Unlikely]]") to serve out the remainder of his life in the Watch. Unfortunately, Maester Aemon's health deteriorates as the trip continues, and both the child and Gilly are miserable. Dareon has nothing but scorn for the wildling girl, but Aemon tells Sam to look closely at the baby to find the source of Gilly's grief. When Sam realizes that the baby is actually Dalla and Mance Rayder's, not her own, he is shocked by Jon's [[IDidWhatIHadToDo cold-heartedness]]. On deck, the storm has passed, but there is lightning in the distance, and Sam realizes: "The worst isn’t done. The worst is just beginning, and there are no happy endings."

Podrick Payne is no more a squire than Brienne is a knight, but that isn't stopping her from training him -- nor from him calling her "Ser. My lady." They are on the way to Maidenpool, now strongly garrisoned by Lord Randyll Tarly. She falls in with a farmer and his wife, bringing a load of eggs into town; she defends the wife against leering soldiers, being forced to draw her sword, but the fight is stopped by the arrival of Ser Hyle Hunt, one of Tarly's captains. Brienne loathes the sight of him. Ser Hyle waves the farmers through, and the husband thanks him for being "[[KnightInShiningArmor a true knight]]." (Brienne, who drew her sword to defend him and his wife, is strangely forgotten.) She seeks an audience with Lord Randyll, who is brusque as always, telling her not to bother seeking Lysa Tully in the Vale -- and not to come running to him when she ends up raped. Ser Hyle offers to see her to an inn, but she brushes him off. As she waits for Nimble Dick, she thinks back to the last time she saw Hyle Hunt, and many others -- in King Renly's camp, where she came to offer her service and swear fealty. An ExtraordinarilyEmpoweredGirl in a camp full of men with TestosteronePoisoning, she expected to be dismissed... but instead everyone, including Hyle, was nice to her, even nicer than her three fiancés had been as her father tried to broker a match for her ([[NoManWantsAnAmazon without success]]). She had just begun to frown over this SuspiciousVideoGameGenerosity when Lord Randyll had brought her in and told her what his son Dickon had learned: the knights had made [[TheBet a wager]] on who would take her virginity. Additionally, he told her, the whole thing was [[UsefulNotes/VictimBlaming her fault]], for not [[StayInTheKitchen Staying In The Kitchen]]. She is shaken from her ruminations by the arrival of Nimble Dick, who is proud of the fact he fooled a fool, and is willing to take Brienne (and Pod) to where he last left the fellow. Brienne, hoping the fool will turn out to be Ser Dontos, agrees.

Podrick Payne is no more a squire than Brienne is a knight, but that isn't stopping her from training him -- nor from him calling her "Ser. My lady." They are on the way to Maidenpool, now strongly garrisoned by Lord Randyll Tarly. She falls in with a farmer and his wife, bringing a load of eggs into town; she defends the wife against leering soldiers, being forced to draw her sword, but the fight is stopped by the arrival of Ser Hyle Hunt, one of Tarly's captains. Brienne loathes the sight of him. Ser Hyle waves the farmers through, and the husband thanks him for being "[[KnightInShiningArmor a true knight]]." She seeks an audience with Lord Randyll, who is brusque as always, telling her not to bother seeking Lysa Tully in the Vale -- and not to come running to him when she ends up raped. Ser Hyle offers to see her to an inn, but she brushes him off. As she waits for Nimble Dick, she thinks back to the last time she saw Hyle Hunt, and many others -- in King Renly's camp, where she came to offer her service and swear fealty. An ExtraordinarilyEmpoweredGirl in a camp full of men with TestosteronePoisoning, she expected to be dismissed... but instead everyone, including Hyle, was nice to her, even nicer than her three fiancés had been as her father tried to broker a match for her ([[NoOneWantsAnAmazon without success]]). She had just begun to frown over this SuspiciousVideoGameGenerosity when Lord Randyll had brought her in and told her what his son Dickon had learned: the knights had made [[TheBet a wager]] on who would take her virginity. Additionally, he told her, the whole thing was [[UsefulNotes/VictimBlaming her fault]], for not [[StayInTheKitchen Staying In The Kitchen]]. She is shaken from her ruminations by the arrival of Nimble Dick, who is proud of the fact he fooled a fool, and is willing to take Brienne (and Pod) to where he last left the fellow. Brienne, hoping the fool will turn out to be Ser Dontos, agrees.

Ser Arys Oakheart, sworn brother of the [[PraetorianGuard Kingsguard]], is on his way to meet a woman. He must wear Dornish robes instead of his whites, as all of Sunspear is a-fervor after the Sand Snakes' imprisonment. He also feels guilty for leaving Princess Myrcella alone, but reasons that she is well-protected with her fiancé Prince Trystane for company (and will [[PerfectlyArrangedMarriage scarcely notice Arys' absence anyhow]]). Soon they will all be off to the Water Gardens, where they ought to be safe -- especially since Prince Doran has asked Arys not to tell anyone that they are leaving. When he arrives at the meeting-place, he plans to turn her down and reinforce his VowOfCelibacy... but [[DiamondsInTheBuff all she's wearing is a snake bracelet]], with nothing to cover her RegalRinglets or [[BuxomIsBetter considerable charms]], and [[ImAManICantHelpIt lust overwhelms him]], leaving him sated, satisfied and knowing that if he died right now, he would die happy. ...But he keeps living, and guilt sets in. He says that this must be the last time, and the woman points out that he's said that before, and that true love would never say that. When confronted with his vows, she points out that Arys is empirically ''not'' the first white sword to break that particular vow -- Ser Lucamore the Lusty is in the history books, after all.[[note]]16 children. No, you read that right. King Jaehaerys I had him take the black -- after having him [[CripplingCastration gelded]].[[/note]] The woman then moves on to her political argument: Arys's masters have been horrible people. (He thinks on how he [[WouldHurtAGirl punched Sansa]] on Joffrey's orders -- though both in this chapter and in Sansa's prior narration it has been established that he would do so as lightly as possible; and the memories fill him with guilt today.) Wouldn't Myrcella make a better ruler than Tommen?, the woman asks, and Arys must admit that she would. So the woman -- Arianne Martell, Princess of Dorne, Prince Doran's eldest daughter and heir-apparent to Sunspear -- makes her play. Arys reflects ruefully on Lord Commander of the Kingsguard Ser Criston Cole, called Kingmaker -- who disinherited Princess Rhaenyra, Viserys I's intended heir, in favor of her younger brother Aegon II, setting off the SuccessionCrisis today called "the Dance of the Dragons." But his concern is no match for Arianne's own pathos: when she was younger, she found a letter written by her father that told her younger brother Quentyn that ''he'' would rule Dorne, [[TheUnfavorite not Arianne]], in Doran's stead. Arys has ''two'' princesses with a common cause, now. [[FemmeFatale Will he defend them?]] And Arys, that KnightInShiningArmor, agrees.

!!! Cersei III
The morning of the wedding of King Tommen I Baratheon to Margaery Tyrell finds Cersei in a foul mood. Jaime assures her that nothing will happen to Tommen, but Cersei is certain that Tyrion is lurking somewhere, planning some sort of {{revenge}} (cf ''Recap/AClashOfKings'', Tyrion XII). Perhaps relatedly, she plans to cap off the wedding ceremony by having the Tower of the Hand ceremonially burnt down. What she calls ProperlyParanoid, Jaime calls absurdity, and as he leaves, she wonders how she could have ever loved him. During the wedding (a meager event compared to Joffrey's extravagant nuptials), Ser Kevan comes by to mention that he is going to Darry, to see Lancel wed to Amerei Frey, daughter of Mariya Darry; he also expresses his displeasure that Cersei has named other (lesser) relatives to the position of Warden of the West and castellan of Casterly Rock. He asks about rumors that Sandor Clegane has joined the brotherhood without banners. Cersei disclaims any responsibility for this, but Kevan's parting comment is, "When a dog goes bad, the fault lies with his master." Jaime tells her that most of the Tyrells are departing the next day, leaving only Margaery and Loras behind, but that's still too many for Cersei: she remembers the prophecy made to her by Maggy the Frog, her lips glistening red with blood: "Queen you shall be, until there comes another, younger and more beautiful, to cast you down and take all you hold dear." [[INeedAFreakingDrink Cersei wonders]] if Margaery is this queen. She then has a FreakOut when Tommen chokes on a bit of wine. She has to leave the hall, where Lady Taena Merrywether offers her sympathies... and also news that one of Cersei's maids is spying on her for the Tyrells. Cersei is suspicious of her motives, but Lady Taena replies merely that [[ProfessionalButtKisser she knows where the power lies]]. Back inside, Jaime tries to assure her that it was nothing, but Cersei realizes [[InTheEndYouAreOnYourOwn she can trust no one]] and needs to surround herself with new advisors. She turns down everyone who asks her for a dance, but does eye Aurane Waters, bastard child of House Velaryon, who -- with his Valyrian silver hair and blue eyes -- looks a bit like the late Rhaegar Targaryen. A little bit drunk, she brings everyone outside to watch the Tower of the Hand be consumed by wildfire. Most everyone goes to bed (including the King and his new Queen, who at Olenna Tyrell's insistence will be sharing a bed even if consummation is physically impossible), but Cersei remains to watch the flames burn down, arm in arm with Ser Osmund Kettleblack.

Though ''[=ASoIaF=]'' has always engaged in FourLinesAllWaiting, ''A Feast for Crows'' takes it to a new level by restricting the story by geography. This novel concerns ''only'' those characters who are (or, in one character's case, will spend the majority of their time in) the southron Six Kingdoms, as well as Braavos, the northernmost of the Nine Free Cities. Events concerning characters in the North, on the Wall and in the far East are included in the next volume, ''Literature/ADanceWithDragons''. Perhaps relatedly, the GeodesicCast ''really'' takes off in both books; ''[aFfC=]'' adds more new {{narrator}}s than both previous books ''combined''.

Asha Greyjoy is at Ten Towers waiting for the arrival of those houses who will support her. There aren't many. She calls for food and care for her captives (Lady Glover and her children, captured at Deepwood Motte) and then goes to visit her uncle Rodrik Harlaw, called "the Reader" for his [[TestosteronePoisoning perverse and unmanly habit]]. It is in his name that all the supporters have come, but he does not think they will follow [[StayInTheKitchen Asha]] -- even with the kingsmoot on her side, which she had not heard about until he informs her. He offers to name her his heir instead, so that she's not present when Euron wins and [[KillEmAll kills all his competitors]], but she declines. Lord Rodrik is not interested in attending the kingsmoot, because it will change nothing: "Archmaester Rigney once wrote that [[ShoutOut history is a wheel]], for the nature of man is [[HistoryRepeats fundamentally unchanging]]."[[note]]James Oliver Rigney is the real name of the man who wrote ''Literature/TheWheelOfTime'' under the NomDePlume "Robert Jordan." He and GRRM were friends and mutual admirers before the former's death in 2007.[[/note]] As she heads out, Asha runs into Tristifer Botley, whom she has been avoiding on account of his [[AllLoveIsUnrequited unrequited love]] for her. Sure enough, it's an awkward meeting; he promises that he has saved his purity for her. ([[MyGirlIsASlut Asha has done no such thing.]]) She turns him down, hard, and leaves him in the moonlight.

It's hard for Sansa to sleep, because Marillion is singing. Since the sky cells have NoFourthWall, his voice carries. She wishes he had chosen to lose his voice, rather than his fingers, after admitting to the murder of Lady Lysa Arryn -- while Lord Petyr Baelish, Protector of the Vale, is glad he can still admit "the truth" to the other Lords of the Vale, Sansa is worried he will tell the ''actual'' truth. The next day, Lord Nestor Royce and his son Albar arrive to hear the confessions. Little Lord Robert is fretful: someone locked him into his room last night, which meant he couldn't go snuggle with "Alayne" (which is precisely why Alayne had it done). He says what everyone has told him: that Marillion killed his mother, and that Alayne saw him do it. Alayne delivers her lies well, with her tears and fright adding to the veracity of her statement; so does Marillion, whom the Royces never liked anyway. They decide to leave him in the sky cells, where he will inevitably die (or jump). Lord Nestor tells Littlefinger that his (Nestor's) cousin, Lord Yohn Royce, is gathering support for an attempt to oust him (Littlefinger) from his position. Littlefinger, who already knew this, is unfazed, but he gains Lord Nestor's support by claiming that Lysa always relied on him, and wanted to grant him, and his lesser branch of House Royce, permanent lordship of the Gates of the Moon, a lesser castle that defends the Eyrie and thus has always remained within House Arryn. After he has left, Littlefinger points out how men will believe flattering lies; Sansa also notes that Lord Nestor now has a vested interest in keeping Littlefinger in his position, as Baelish signed the decree in his own name. Littlefinger is pleased at her acumen. That night, the eight-year-old Robert makes it into her bed (Alayne forgot to ask them to lock his door), and asks if Alayne is now his mother. She supposes that she is. "If a lie was [[LyingToProtectYourFeelings kindly meant]], there was no harm in it."

Duskendale shows the ravages of the northern attack; its gates are closed for the night, and in the morning she sees merchants selling off arms and armor looted from the dead, some bearing coats of arms she recognizes. When a second person in a row mentions the Lothston black bat on her shield as being an ill omen, she decides to get the shield repainted, asking for a coat she remembers seeing in her father's armory: a green shooting star above an elm tree.[[note]]This is a ShoutOut to the "Dunk and Egg" prequels: these arms were commissioned by the hedge knight Duncan the Tall in 209 AC. When GRRM announced that one of Dunk's descendents would feature in this novel, a large body of speculation that Brienne is his descendent sprang up almost overnight.[[/note]] Lord Benfred Rykker of Dun Fort cannot meet with her as he is in the field with Lord Randyll Tarly, but his castellan, Ser Rufus Leek, tells her that they have seen no sign of Dontos Hollard since he was taken away after [[InfoDump the Defiance of Duskendale]].[[note]]In 277 AC, Lord Denys Darklyn of Duskendale refused to pay taxes to the Mad King Aerys. Duskendale had once been an affluent port on Blackwater Bay, but King's Landing had eclipsed it, leading to an economic decline. Darklyn accompanied his rebellion with an invitation that Aerys come personally to hear their complaints. Lord Tywin Lannister, Hand of the King, told Aerys what a bad idea this was, but a rift was already growing between the two, and Aerys, seeking to demonstrate that he would be fine without his HypercompetentSidekick, went. It was a trap: the king was held captive, and his sworn shield Ser Gwayne Gaunt killed by House Darklyn's retainers, House Hollard. Lord Tywin came and laid siege at once, but Lord Denys threatened to kill the king if any hostilities were launched. A half-year-old MexicanStandoff finally came to an end when Ser Barristan the Bold offered to perform a StealthMission and bring the king out. [[BadassNormal He succeeded.]] Thereafter Aerys had every Darklyn and Hollard [[KillEmAll put to death]]; the only survivor was the teenaged Dontos, whom Barristan interceded for personally. Still, [[NothingIsTheSameAnymore Nothing Was The Same Anymore]]; Aerys's delicate balance between paranoia and sanity was shattered, becoming the Mad King in truth as well as name.[[/note]] Brienne runs into a boy with a sty on his eye she thinks she's seen before, back at Rosby, but he flees. At an inn, a dwarf septon mentions a man named "Nimble Dick," who claims he "fooled a fool" into taking ship; Brienne decides to pursue this lead. The next day, she determines that she is definitely being followed by the boy... who admits himself to be Podrick Payne -- Tyrion's squire, [[UndyingLoyalty loyal until the end]], desperate to find his master and hoping Brienne will lead him to the Imp.

On the road to Duskendale, Brienne asks everyone she meets if they have seen a highborn girl with reddish hair. She comes across two hedge knights[[note]]The story's term, possibly coined by GRRM, for a KnightErrant, or what the Japanese would call a {{ronin}}: a knight with the arms, armor and training of the position, but without a lord to serve and a fiefdom to live on. Westeros being the {{deconstruction}} that it is, the economic concerns are typically more important than just being a trained swordsman, and hedge knights are frowned upon.[[/note]], Ser Creighton Longbough and Ser Illifer the Penniless, who comment on the bad luck her shield represents -- Jaime took it from the Harrenhal armory when he left; it bears the sigil of House Lothston, who like all masters of Harrenhal have met a bad end -- but also invite her to share their meal. Reasoning that she is better armed, armored and trained than they are, Brienne agrees. The two men almost change their mind when Ser Illifer deduces she must be the Maid of Tarth, Renly's [[TheKingslayer kingslayer]], but Brienne swears the strongest oath she can find that she did no such thing, and they decide to travel with her to Duskendale, so as to protect her. After passing a large group of poor fellows (or 'sparrows'), lowly holy men bound for King's Landing bearing the bones of septons killed around the Riverlands, they catch up to a merchant guarded by a couple of men and another hedge knight named Ser Shadrich. Joining forces, Ser Shadrich tells Brienne in private that he knows that the maid she seeks is Sansa Stark, and that he seeks her as well, but for a purse of gold offered by Varys. In town, Brienne notices that she is the object of ridicule -- [[StayInTheKitchen as always]]. She offers to buy Creighton and Illifer a room in thanks for the meal the evening before. This is also a convenient excuse to shake them off her trail, as she saddles her horse in the dead of night and rides off alone.

The vigil is planned to last for seven days, so Jaime has a lot of time to think. He remembers the day Prince Rhaegar rode for the Trident -- the last time Jaime saw him alive. Rhaegar had planned to make some changes, maybe call his father to reason, when he got back. He also remembers investigating the gaols. The chief gaoler, Rennifer Longwaters, can tell him nothing about the now-missing Rugen, save that he is rarely at his post -- though, to be fair, his level has only been used thrice of late: Lord Eddard Stark, Grand Maester Pycelle (briefly), and then Tyrion.[[note]]You may recall, back from the first book, that Varys visited Ned in the guise of a gaoler. You may also recall that Varys is a MasterOfDisguise. So, the reason why Rugen went missing the same day Tyrion and Varys did: Rugen ''is'' Varys, in one of his false identities. WordOfGod has confirmed this.[[/note]] Jaime asked Longwaters to tell him everything he knew about the criminal who freed Tyrion -- feeling rather foolish as he did so, since Jaime ''is'' the criminal who freed Tyrion. Overnight, Cersei visits him with the news of Kevan's RefusalOfTheCall. She begs Jaime to take the position of Hand, but Jaime too refuses, more preferring the position of Prince Consort -- or, if not that, a knight of the Kingsguard. Cersei leaves contemptuously. Come morning, the Hand's body is visibly rotting, and the stench is so great that King Tommen I Baratheon (9 years old) is sickened into fleeing. His mother (and "uncle") join him on the steps of the sept, and counsels the young king to "[[HappyPlace go away inside]]" if bad things are happening to him. Tommen mentions that he used to do this when Joffrey was especially mean to him. When Mace Tyrell approaches, Jaime helps broker peace between him and Cersei by arranging for them to dine that evening. Cersei is incensed, but Jaime suggests she get Mace to [[HistoricalInJoke go besiege Storm's End again]][[note]]He last did this during Robert's Rebellion; TheSiege was ineffective, but then sieges most often devolve into blockades that only work when the defenders -- in this case, Stannis Baratheon and his men -- are starved out. It almost worked, too, before a smuggler from Flea Bottom got in with some onions. (And that's why Ser Davos Seaworth's InSeriesNickname is "the Onion Knight.") Mace continued sitting around doing nothing until Ned Stark came by and announced that the king Mace had sided with, Aerys II, had died, at which point Mace packed up and went home.[[/note]], as this will make him feel important ''and'' get him out of her hair. If he refuses to leave before Tommen and Margaery (17, twice wed and twice widowed) are wed, then Cersei should get it over with -- the marriage can be annulled before it is consummated, which gives Cersei ''years'' to get plans in place. Besides, [[UriahGambit maybe Mace will get impatient and try to storm the gate]]. Cersei especially likes that part.

-->--Creator/GeorgeRRMartin, ''Literature/AFeastForCrows'', pg.50(?) (paperback)

The ''Titan's Daughter'' has returned home. Arya watches as they sail under the Titan of Braavos, a giant statue whose legs span the harbor. The captain's son Denyo is providing an InfoDump on the city's history.[[note]]The free city of Braavos was founded by the moonsingers when they led refugees away from the dragons of Valyria. The Titan has arrow slits and murder holes strategically placed to attack any boat that tries to pass beneath without leave; while the city has no walls, it does have the Arsenal, a massive fleet of ships, and their fortified port.[[/note]] Another son, Yorko, rows her between the many islands of the city, pointing out how Braavos has no state religion, and temples to every god you can imagine. He drops her off in front of the House of Black and White, the temple of the many-faced god. Within, the temple is quite dark with dozens of odd statues, and Arya notices several people in alcoves who are either dead or dying. One troubles her for a drink of water, saying "''Valar morghulis''," and she gives it to him, answering "''Valar dohaeris''." Thereafter he dies. Soon, a robed man with a kind voice tells her that the House of Black and White is a place of peace. He asks her name, but despite Arya's use of nicknames, the man keeps asking until she admits that she is Arya Stark. When the man asks if she fears death, Arya answers no. The man removes his cowl to reveal a decaying, horrible visage, but she sees through the illusion and eats the worm dangling from his eye socket. It dissolves in her mouth, intangible. Impressed, the kindly man asks if she is hungry, to which Arya thinks: ''Yes, but not for food.''

On the road to Duskendale, Brienne asks everyone she meets if they have seen a highborn girl with reddish hair. She comes across two hedge knights[[note]]The story's term, possibly coined by GRRM, for a KnightErrant, or what the Japanese would call a {{ronin}}: a knight with the arms, armor and training of the position, but without a lord to serve and a fiefdom to live on. Westeros being the {{deconstruction}} that it is, the economic concerns are typically more important than just being a trained swordsman, and hedge knights are frowned upon.[[/note]], Ser Creighton Longbough and Ser Illifer the Penniless, who comment on the bad luck her shield represents -- Jaime took it from the Harrenhal armory when he left; it bears the sigil of House Lothston, who like all masters of Harrenhal have met a bad end -- but also invite her to share their meal. Reasoning that she is better armed, armored and trained than they are, Brienne agrees. The two men almost change their mind when Ser Illifer deduces she must be the Maid of Tarth, Renly's [[TheKingslayer kingslayer]], but Brienne swears the strongest oath she can find that she did no such thing, and they decide to travel with her to Duskendale, so as to protect her. After passing a large group of poor fellows (or 'sparrows'), lowly holy men bound for King's Landing bearing the bones of septons killed around the Riverlands, they catch up to a merchant guarded by a couple of men and another hedge knight named Ser Shadrich. Joining forces, Ser Shadrich tells Brienne in private that he knows that the maid she seeks is Sansa Stark, and that he seeks her as well, but for a purse of gold offered by Varys. In town, Brienne notices that she is the object of ridicule -- as always -- and offers to buy Creighton and Illifer a room in thanks for the meal the evening before. This is also a convenient excuse to shake them off her trail, as she saddles her horse in the dead of night and rides off alone.

Sam has been in Castle Black's library for over a day, hunting down information the Lord Commander wants. He emerges into the sunlight to see men working on rebuilding the stair up the Wall. Pyp, Grenn and Dolorous Edd mention that Melisandre has plans for Mance Rayder -- something about king's blood -- and that Stannis has been trying to rally support from the northern lords. So far, only the Karstarks have accepted alliance. Sam finds the Lord Commander -- Jon Snow -- regarding a "paper shield": a letter to King Tommen promising that the Night's Watch is TrueNeutral in the struggle for the Iron Throne, despite Stannis's constant requests that they ally with him. After some debate, Sam and Jon agree that a paper shield is better than nothing. Sam brings up the results of his research, an InfoDump that we will elide to save time.[[note]]Sam has found records of at least four Lord Commanders who ascended to their post younger than Jon did -- all of whom who, like Jon, had Stark blood. As to the Others, the children of the forest used to give the Night's Watch a hundred dragonglass daggers every year during the Age of Heroes. The Others only come when it is cold and dark, or perhaps it becomes cold and dark when they come. They ride dead animals, and there is something about "ice spiders." Men they kill must be burned lest they rise again as their thralls. They are apparently only vulnerable to fire and obsidian, though Sam found one account that said the "last hero" slew Others with "dragonsteel." Jon asks if this means Valryian steel; Sam isn’t sure, but thinks so. (So does ''Series/GameOfThrones''. GRRM might have different ideas.)[[/note]] Jon announces his intention to send Gilly away, and Sam -- uncomfortable over his reactions to her -- agrees. Jon then announces his intention to send ''Sam'' with her: they are to head to Oldtown aboardship (via Eastwatch-by-theSea) with Maester Aemon, who is not safe at the Wall so long as Melisandre remains (he too has king's blood, after all), and when they arrive Sam is to train to be a maester. Sam thinks of his father, Lord Randyll Tarly, who scoffs at the servile, but Jon's orders will not be ignored. He also commands Sam to never call himself craven again; he is the first man in living memory to slay an Other, after all. The next morning, Gilly is oddly distraught, demanding Lord Jon find a good wet nurse for Dalla's baby and not name him until he's two years old, as per wildling custom. Jon agrees, and wishes them a safe voyage.

Though ''[=ASoIaF=]'' has always engaged in FourLinesAllWaiting, ''A Feast for Crows'' takes it to a new level by restricting the story by geography. This novel concerns ''only'' those characters who are (or, in one character's case, will spend the majority of their time in) the southron Six Kingdoms, as well as Braavos, the northernmost of the Nine Free Cities. Events concerning characters in the North, on the Wall and in the far East are included in the next volume, ''Literature/ADanceWithDragons''.

!! Cersei

-->--Creator/GeorgeRRMartin, ''Literature/AFeastForCrows'', pg.50(?) (paperback)

At the Water Gardens, House Martell's private retreat, Prince Doran has lived for two years; the temperate climate agrees with his gout, and he gets to watch children at play.[[note]]Prince Maron Martell had the Water Gardens built as a gift for his new bride, Daenerys Targaryen, when they wed over a century ago in the ArrangedMarriage that, officially, brought Dorne under the jurisdiction of the Iron Throne. It was her idea to host children there, letting them splash in the pools; it is the only place on the continent where no distinction is drawn between high- and lowborn.[[/note]] His captain of the guards, Areo Hotah, stops Prince Doran by being interrupted by the [[InSeriesNickname Sand Snakes]], LiteralBastard daughters of the Red Viper. At the Water Gardens, and as they return to Sunspear, Hotah runs interference as Obara, and then Nymeria, and finally Tyene all approach Prince Doran to beg vengeance for their father. They all want different things: Obara to burn Oldtown to the ground, Lady Nym to assassinate Cersei and the other Lannisters, Tyene to carry through the ArrangedMarriage between Prince Trystane and Princess Myrcella to lure the Lannisters into attacking. Prince Doran tells them all to hold their anger in abeyance, as he will not move until he is ready. To ensure this, he orders his daughter Arianne to have all the Sand Snakes arrested, including the youngest ones who will stay at the Water Gardens with their mother Ellaria. Hotah reminds him that all Dorne will howl, but Prince Doran merely sighs and hopes Tywin Lannister hears it: "so he might know what a loyal friend he has in Sunspear."

At the Water Gardens, House Martell's private retreat, Prince Doran has lived for two years; the temperate climate agrees with his gout, and he gets to watch children at play.[[note]]Prince Maron Martell had the Water Gardens built as a gift for his new bride, Daenerys Targaryen, when they wed over a century ago. It was her idea to host children there, letting them splash in the pools; it is the only place on the continent where no distinction is drawn between high- and lowborn.[[/note]] His captain of the guards, Areo Hotah, stops Prince Doran by being interrupted by the [[InSeriesNickname Sand Snakes]], LiteralBastard daughters of the Red Viper. At the Water Gardens, and as they return to Sunspear, Hotah runs interference as Obara, and then Nymeria, and finally Tyene all approach Prince Doran to beg vengeance for their father. They all want different things: Obara to burn Oldtown to the ground, Lady Nym to assassinate Cersei and the other Lannisters, Tyene to carry through the ArrangedMarriage between Prince Trystane and Princess Myrcella to lure the Lannisters into attacking. Prince Doran tells them all to hold their anger in abeyance, as he will not move until he is ready. To ensure this, he orders his daughter Arianne to have all the Sand Snakes arrested, including the youngest ones who will stay at the Water Gardens with their mother Ellaria. Hotah reminds him that all Dorne will howl, but Prince Doran merely sighs and hopes Tywin Lannister hears it: "so he might know what a loyal friend he has in Sunspear."

*** NOTE:*** Though ''[=ASoIaF=]'' has always engaged in FourLinesAllWaiting, ''A Feast for Crows'' takes it to a new level by restricting the story by geography. This novel concerns ''only'' those characters who are (or, in one character's case, will spend the majority of their time in) the southron Six Kingdoms, as well as Braavos, the northernmost of the Nine Free Cities. Events concerning characters in the North, on the Wall and in the far East are included in the next volume, ''Literature/ADanceWithDragons''.

*** NOTE:*** Though ''[=ASoIaF=]'' has always engaged in FourLinesAllWaiting, ''A Feast for Crows'' takes it to a new level by restricting the story by geography. This novel concerns ''only'' those characters who are (or, in one character's case, will spend the majority of their time in) the southron Six Kingdoms, as well as Braavos, the northernmost of the Nine Free Cities. Events concerning characters in the North, on the Wall and in the far East are included in the next volume, ''Literature/ADanceWithDragons''.

In a tavern in Oldtown, a student at the Citadel, Pate -- who shares his name with "the pig boy" of folklore -- shoots the breeze with some of his friends: Mollander, Alleras, Armen, and Roone. The others are discussing the question of whether dragons are still alive, somewhere out there, and a few mention the rumors out of Qarth that the last Targaryen -- what's her name, Daella? Daenaera? Daenerys? -- might have hatched some. Pate is preoccupied with Rosey, the 15-year-old daughter of a serving maid, whose virginity is for sale... for the hefty price of a gold piece. Pate (who has studied at the Citadel for five years but has yet to even start forging his chain) thinks Rosey favors him: she introduced him to someone named [[NoNameGiven the Alchemist]], who promised to fund Pate's carnal desires for the price of a bit of thievery. His thoughts are interrupted by "Lazy" Leo Tyrell, who confirms the rumors out of Qarth and also mentions that the dragonglass candle in Marwyn the Mage's office has started burning -- a feat that's supposed to be BeyondTheImpossible, especially for an EccentricMentor like Marwyn. Per Leo, this means magic is returning to the world. As the group breaks up to return to the Citadel, the Alchemist accosts Pate. He hands over the payment -- a golden dragon -- and Pate, [[GenreBlindness driven by some dim suspicion]], asks to see the man's face. The Alchemist is young, with black hair and a faint scar on his right cheek; Pate doesn't recognize him.[[note]]Savvy readers, however, might: it's the same way Arya described Jaqen H'ghar's post-transformation face, the last time she saw him.[[/note]] Pate gives him the thing he was asked to steal: an iron key that will, supposedly, [[TooDumbToLive open any door in the Citadel]]. The Alchemist thanks him and sends him on his way. So Pate heads off with his golden dragon. ...And then [[HeKnowsTooMuch dies on the cobblestones]].