History Quotes / Whiplash

->''"Is that really the fastest you can play, you worthless Hymie fuck? [[KickTheDog No wonder mommy ran out on you.]] Get off the fucking kit.'' (Tanner replaces Andrew on the drums) ''And here comes... Mr. Gay Pride of the Upper West Side himself. Unfortunately this is not a Bette Midler concert. We will not be serving Cosmopolitans or Baked Alaskas, so just play faster than you give fucking handjobs, will you please? One, two, one two...'' (Tanner drums briefly before Fletcher stops him) ''Not even fucking close.'' (Donnelly replaces Tanner) ''Let's go with the [[UsefulNotes/{{Ireland}} Irish]] mick fucking Paddy-cracker now. You know, you actually do look quite a bit like a leprechaun. I think I'm gonna start calling you Flannery."''

->'''Andrew''': Fuck off Johnny Utah! Turn my pages, [[ThisIsForEmphasisBitch bitch!]]

!!About the [[Film/{{Whiplash}} 2014]] film:
->''"''Whiplash ''honors neither jazz nor cinema; it’s a work of petty didacticism that shows off petty mastery, and it feeds the sort of minor celebrity that Andrew aspires to. Buddy Rich. Buddy fucking Rich.''
-->'''[[https://www.newyorker.com/culture/richard-brody/whiplash-getting-jazz-right-movies Richard Brody]]'''

!!For the [[Film/{{Whiplash}} 2014]] film:

->'''Andrew''': Fuck off Johnny Utah! Turn my pages, [[ThisIsForEmphasisBitch bitch!]]

->''"Is that really the fastest you can play, you worthless Hymie fuck? [[KickTheDog No wonder mommy ran out on you.]] GET OFF!'' (Tanner replaces Andrew on the drums) ''And here comes... Mr. Gay Pride of the Upper West Side himself. Unfortunately this is not a Bette Midler concert. We will not be serving Cosmopolitans or Baked Alaskas, so just play faster than you give fucking handjobs, will you please? One, two, one two...'' (Tanner drums briefly before Fletcher stops him) ''Not even fucking close.'' (Donnelly replaces Tanner) ''So, the [[UsefulNotes/{{Ireland}} Irish]] mick fucking Paddy-cracker now. You know, you actually do look a bit like a leprechaun. I think I'll start calling you Flannery."''

->'''Nicole''': And when I do see you, you'll treat me like shit because I'm just some girl who doesn't know what she wants and ''you'' have a path and ''[[ItsAllAboutMe you're]]'' [[ItsAllAboutMe going to be great and I'm going to be forgotten]]. And therefore you won't give me the time of day because you have bigger things to pursue...]]\\

'''Neiman''': [[SanitySlippage I'd rather die drunk, broke at 34, and have people at a dinner table talk about me than live to be rich and sober at 90 and nobody remembered who I was.]]\\

->'''Nicole''': And when I do see you, you'll treat me like shit because I'm just some girl who doesn't know what she wants and ''you'' have a path and ''[[ItsAllAboutMe you're]]'' [[ItsAllAboutMe going to be great and I'm going to be forgotten]]. And therefore you won't give me the time of day because you have bigger things to pursue...\\

'''Nicole''': ''What the fuck is wrong with you?''

->''"Is that really the fastest you can play, you worthless Hymie fuck? [[KickTheDog No wonder mommy ran out on you.]] Get off the fucking kit.'' (Tanner replaces Andrew on the drums) ''And here comes... Mr. Gay Pride of the Upper West Side himself. Unfortunately this is not a Bette Midler concert. We will not be serving Cosmopolitans or Baked Alaskas, so just play faster than you give fucking handjobs, will you please? One, two, one two...'' (Tanner drums briefly before Fletcher stops him) ''Not even fucking close.'' (Donnelly replaces Tanner) ''So, the [[UsefulNotes/{{Ireland}} Irish]] mick fucking Paddy-cracker now. You know, you actually do look a bit like a leprechaun. I think I'll start calling you Flannery."''

'''Fletcher''': '''[[SuddenlyShouting THEN WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU SAY SO?!?]]''' I've carried your fat ass for too long, Metz. I'm not gonna have you cost us the competition because your mind's on a fucking Happy Meal instead of on pitch. Jackson, congratulations, you're fourth chair. Metz, why are you still sitting there?! Get the fuck out! (''Metz hurriedly rushes out of the room'') For the record, Metz wasn't outta tune... You were Erickson. But he didn't know and that's bad enough.

'''Fletcher''': Exactly. Parker's a young kid, pretty good on the sax. Gets up to play at a cutting session… and he fucks it up. And Jones nearly decapitates him for it. And he's laughed off-stage. Cries himself to sleep that night but the next morning, what does he do? He practices. And he practices and he practices with one goal in mind: Never to be laughed at again. And a year later, he goes back to the Reno... And he steps up on that stage and he plays the best motherfucking solo the world has ever heard. (''beat'') So imagine if Jones had just said: "Well, that's okay Charlie. Eh... that was alright. Good job." Then Charlie thinks to himself, "Well, shit. I did do a pretty good job." End of story, no "Bird." That, to me, is... ''an absolute tragedy.'' But that's just what the world wants now! People wonder why {{jazz}} is dying. (''beat'') I'll tell you man. And every Starbucks "jazz" album just proves my point, really. There are no two words in the English language more harmful... Than ''"good job."''

->''"You have a medical condition? What are you, fucking Sanjay Gupta?!'' Play the goddamn music!!!"''

'''Fletcher''': '''THEN WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU SAY SO?!?''' I've carried your fat ass for too long, Metz. I'm not gonna have you cost us the competition because your mind's on a fucking Happy Meal instead of on pitch. Jackson, congratulations, you're fourth chair. Metz, why are you still sitting there?! Get the fuck out! (''Metz hurriedly rushes out of the room'') For the record, Metz wasn't outta tune... You were Erickson. But he didn't know and that's bad enough.

'''Andrew Neiman''': Yup, Music/JoJones threw a cymbal at his head.\\

Fletcher: (''Fletcher quickly walks to Neiman'') '''Start counting'''.\\