History Main / NoSympathyForGrudgeholders

[[folder:Anime And Manga]]
* In ''Manga/LoveStage'', Izumi is known for holding grudges, 3 weeks being his record, so when he and Ryouma have an argument on set, Rei just tells him to get over it and make up with Ryouma so they can continue filming the show.

* ''FanFic/RosarioVampireBrightestDarkness'':

-->[[spoiler:'''Luxe:''']]. You’re too young to remember, but you should have known that my name came out of a reaping bowl, same as Plat’s, same as yours. Don’t act like either of us chose this life. So don’t you ever call me ''Career'', boy. Do you understand?

[[folder:Film]]

-->'''Rachel Dawes''': You're just another coward with a gun. ''[[WhatTheHellHero Your father would be ashamed of you]].''
* In ''Film/HomeAlone'', Buzz humiliates Kevin during the Christmas concert, and between Buzz's prank and Kevin's retaliation, the concert is ruined. Later, in front of the family, Buzz (insincerely) apologizes to Kevin for what he did, then covertly taunts Kevin about it. Kevin refuses to accept the apology or apologize for his own actions. The result is that Buzz receives no punishment while Kevin is banished to the attic for the night. Have we mentioned that Kevin's family are far from embodiments of the Christmas spirit?
** Even when the family, having found out they accidentally left Kevin behind, express concern for his safety, Buzz refuses to be concerned, going so far as to chide the others for it, on the grounds that Kevin could use some time in the real world.
--->'''Megan:''' You're not at all worried that something might happen to Kevin?\\

*** [[GilliganCut And during this time, of course, back home, the Wet Bandits start to make their move...]]

* In Creator/GeorgeRRMartin's ''Literature/ASongOfIceAndFire'' most of the problems in the feudal society happens because everybody holds on to grudges and refuses to learn how to forgive. Stannis Baratheon and Tyrion Lannister are both perpetually angry that they are not respected. Caitlyn Stark towards the Lannisters and later [[spoiler:the undead who returns to perpetuate her cycle of revenge]]. Likewise Daenerys Targaryen refuses to see the enemies of her psychotic father as anything other than "usurper's dogs".

* In ''Literature/TheHouseOfNight'', [[TheDragon Rephaim]] [[spoiler:murders Dragon's wife]]. He later switches sides, and Zoey is shocked- ''[[MoralDissonance shocked]]''- that Dragon doesn't forgive Rephaim.

* The three-part Series 9 finale of ''Series/DoctorWho'' has the Doctor as the grudgeholder against [[spoiler: Ashildr/Me]] and [[spoiler: Rassilon and the High Council]] for being responsible for his capture and torture, a plot that also inadvertently [[spoiler: killed Clara Oswald]]. '''AND''' the latter party was also [[spoiler: partially responsible for the Last Great Time War]]. Despite these parties' complete unwillingness to apologize or atone for their actions, the Doctor is constantly called out for wanting to see these parties get what's coming to them. When he manages to get back at the latter in "Hell Bent" and if anything is merciful in [[spoiler: exiling them to wherever they can find a home]], he still gets chewed out for it even when he points out that HE is the one who was tortured ([[spoiler: for four-and-a-half billion years, though admittedly it was ultimately a Self-Inflicted Hell]]).

[[folder:Professional Wrestling]]

[[folder:Religion]]
* ''Literature/TheBible'':
** In [[Literature/TheFourGospels Matthew 6:15]], Jesus states to his disciples that if a person doesn't forgive the transgressor, then neither will God forgive the person who doesn't forgive, implying that holding a grudge will result in eternal damnation. The justification for this is because God wants His followers to forgive others because He forgave them for their sins.
** In the Parable of the Unmerciful Servant in Matthew 18:21-35, a servant's master forgives his extremely large debt, but when the servant throws another servant in prison for failing to pay a smaller debt, the master then rescinds his forgiveness and punishes the first servant. The point of the parable is that if the servant cannot show mercy to others, he doesn't deserve any mercy himself. Which suggests that forgiveness is an option for someone who did something comparable to what was done and wishes to be forgiven.
** The Bible counsels forgiving someone before sundown at the very latest, because making people hold grudges is one of the Devil's favorite tactics.
[[/folder]]

** [[Literature/TheFourGospels Matthew 6:15]], Jesus states to his disciples that if a person doesn't forgive the transgressor, then neither will God forgive the person who doesn't forgive, which implicates that holding a grudge will land you in hell. This pretty much makes sense considering that Jesus wants humanity to forgive one another because God has done the same to them.

** The bible counsels forgiving someone before sundown at the very latest, because making people hold grudges is one of the Devil's favorite tactics.

* Victims of [[DomesticAbuse abuse]], [[TheBully bullying]], or {{rape|IsTheSpecialKindOfEvil}} often receive this reaction from those who firmly hold the belief that forgiveness is the right option, especially if either the victims are unwilling to let go of what they did or if their aggressors are truly sorry for what they've done.

* Victims of abuse, [[TheBully bullying]], or rape often receive this reaction from those who firmly hold the belief that forgiveness is the right option.

[[folder: Anime And Manga]]

[[folder: Fan Works]]

[[folder: Film]]

[[folder: Literature]]

[[folder: Live-Action TV]]

[[folder: Professional Wrestling]]

[[folder: Religion]]

[[folder: Tabletop Games]]

[[folder: Western Animation]]

This can be taken to ridiculous levels if the wrongdoer never sincerely apologizes for or continues his actions, yet the victim gets flak for not forgiving him. When it's bad enough, the grudgeholder may well let go of their grudge and sincerely apologize to the people around, but then people will still hold him in a bad position, [[CycleOfRevenge creating a chain of grudgeholders.]] One reason why this provokes such anger is that if you refuse to accept reparations, you may end up making your destruction a tactical necessity for someone who (no longer) has nothing against you; a form of DontMakeMeDestroyYou.

* ''FanFic/BurnTheWitchMiraculousLadybug'':

* While Lin from ''WesternAnimation/TheLegendOfKorra'' is a sympathetic character and a good person, her FatalFlaw is holding grudges. Her refusal to let bygones be bygones has serious consequences in her life. It’s ruined her relationship with her ex who genuinely tries to be her friend, her sister who tried for thirty years to apologize, and her mom.

This can be taken to ridiculous levels if the wrongdoer never apologizes for his actions or at least his apology isn't sincere enough, yet the victim gets flak for not forgiving him, which brings to the FamilyUnfriendlyAesop: [[EasilyForgiven forgive one another]] [[TheFarmerAndTheViper even if they still continue to torture you]]. When it's bad enough, the grudgeholder may well let go of their grudge and sincerely apologize to the people around, but then people will still hold him in a bad position, [[CycleOfRevenge creating a chain of grudgeholders.]] One reason why this provokes such anger is that if you refuse to accept reparations, you may end up making your destruction a tactical necessity for someone who (no longer) has nothing against you; a form of DontMakeMeDestroyYou.

* In the ''WesternAnimation/SpongeBobSquarePants'' episode "Squid's Defense", after learning how to defend himself through karate, Squidward goes to beat up a thug that tried to steal his groceries earlier, but finds out that they were going to return them to him. An ashamed [=SpongeBob=] and Sandy scold Squidward for using karate for vengeance and not self-defense and take off his karate belt, followed by Squidward [[DisproportionateRetribution being arrested.]]

* ''Literature/{{Discworld}}'': In ''Discworld/TheTruth'', Mr. Tulip tells Mr. Pin that as long as you have a potato and are sorry, it's all right, you'll get another chance. So Mr. Pin steals Mr. Tulip's potato, murders him, and when he dies, assures Death that he's sorry. Death proceeds to ExactWords him.

[[folder: Fan Fiction]]

* ''Fanfic/TheVictorsProject'': Zig-zagged in the meeting between Rebel victors [[spoiler: Luxe St. James and Nolan De Naro]]. [[spoiler: Luxe]]. is very sympathetic to the absolutely ''brutal'' hardships that [[spoiler: Nolan]]. describes about District 9, but he also makes it clear that thinking The GrassIsGreener in District 1 is an incorrect assumption, making a NotSoDifferent / WeAreStrugglingTogether speech about what a CrapsaccharineWorld District 1 has turned into under President Snow and Luster Lancaster, ending with a WhatTheHellHero line towards [[spoiler: Nolan]]. for his blind hatred of the inner districts and ignorant assumptions about [[spoiler: Luxe]].
--> [[spoiler: '''Luxe:''']]. You’re too young to remember, but you should have known that my name came out of a reaping bowl, same as Plat’s, same as yours. Don’t act like either of us chose this life. So don’t you ever call me ''Career'', boy. Do you understand?

-->-- '''Matthew 6:15''', Literature/TheBible

* ''Fanfic/TheVictorsProject'': Zig-zagged in the meeting between Rebel victors [[spoiler: Luxe St. James and Nolan De Naro]]. [[spoiler]]. is very sympathetic to the absolutely ''brutal'' hardships that [[spoiler: Nolan]]. describes about District 9, but he also makes it clear that thinking The GrassIsGreener in District 1 is an incorrect assumption, making a NotSoDifferent / WeAreStrugglingTogether speech about what a CrapsaccharineWorld District 1 has turned into under President Snow and Luster Lancaster, ending with a WhatTheHellHero line towards [[spoiler: Nolan]]. for his blind hatred of the inner districts and ignorant assumptions about [[spoiler: Luxe]].

* ''Fanfic/TheVictorsProject'': Zig-zagged in the meeting between Reel victors [[spoiler: Luxe St. James and Nolan De Naro]]. [[spoiler]]. is very sympathetic to the absolutely ''brutal'' hardships that [[spoiler: Nolan]]. describes about District 9, but he also makes it clear that thinking TheGrassIsGreener in District 1 is an incorrect assumption, making a NotSoDifferent / WeAreStrugglingTogether speech about what a CrapsaccharineWorld District 1 has turned into under President Snow and Luster Lancaster, ending with a WhatTheHellHero line towards [[spoiler: Nolan]]. for his blind hatred of the inner districts and ignorant assumptions about [[spoiler: Luxe]].

* One of the reasons the Dwarves of ''TabletopGame/{{Warhammer}}'' don't get along with other races is because their grudges are treasured from generation to generation (no matter how minor or long ago), even kept in a BigBookOfWar that they take to battle. It goes without saying that their attempts to resolve one results in more dead dwarves, meaning more grudges to be settled later on. Humans, who have a much shorter memory, don't understand why they won't drop it (for example, a noble who'd commissioned a castle from them paid three boatloads of gold, and his name went in the book because the sum was three pieces short).

And along comes this trope. As a result of Bob's unforgiving approach and his tendency to hold a grudge, he is [[WhatTheHellHero receiving criticism and antagonism from other characters for not being forgiving to Alice]]. They knew that Alice's apology was very sincere, and it was appropriate for Bob to forgive. They may know that the more Bob holds a grudge, [[HeWhoFightsMonsters he'll be just as bad as the one who wronged him]]. Either way, someone else starts losing sympathy for Bob because of his rejected apology.

Many {{revenge}} plots will involve a character successfully carrying out their revenge on their tormentor, but as a result, their loved ones become ashamed of him, telling him that he's crossed the MoralEventHorizon which may or may not be true at all. It's possible for the character to feel [[MyGodWhatHaveIDone remorseful for carrying out their revenge]], and may [[TheAtoner undo the damage that revenge has caused.]] [[IgnoredEpiphany Or maybe not.]] Expect this trope to be enforced in a work focusing on a character to [[AnAesop learn]] how to {{forgive|ness}}.

The opposite of PunishedForSympathy where a character receives contempt from others for showing pity, kindness, and mercy to the offender. This can be one of the ways where character is MadeOutToBeAJerkass. A subtrope of TheComplainerIsAlwaysWrong. Often overlaps with FreudianExcuseIsNoExcuse. If the character has deeply injured a third party, the OrderedApology may be demanded for forgiveness. Can be due to the belief that IfYouKillHimYouWillBeJustLikeHim or IfYouTauntHimYouWillBeJustLikeHim.

* In ''Film/HomeAlone'', Buzz humiliates Kevin during the Christmas concert, and between Buzz's prank and Kevin's retaliation, the concert is ruined. Later, in front of the family, Buzz (insincerely) apologizes to Kevin for what he did, then covertly taunts Kevin about it. Kevin refuses to accept the apology or apologize for his own actions. The result is that Buzz receives no punishment while Kevin is banished to the attic for the night. Have we mentioned that Kevin's family is far from embodiments of the Christmas spirit?

* One of the reasons the Dwarves of ''TabletopGame/{{Warhammer}}'' don't get along with other races is because their grudges are treasured from generation to generation (no matter how minor or long ago), even kept in a BigBookOfWar that they take to battle. It goes without saying that their attempts to resolve one results in more dead dwarves, meaning more grudges to be settled later on. Humans, who have a much shorter memory, don't understand why they won't drop it (for example, a noble who'd commissioned a castle from them paid three boatloads of gold, and his name went in the book when it was discovered the sum was three pieces short).
[[/folder]]

[[folder: Western Animation]]
* While Lin from ''WesternAnimation/TheLegendOfKorra'' is a sympathetic character and a good person, her FatalFlaw is holding grudges. Her refusal to let bygones be bygones has serious consequences in her life. It’s ruined her relationship with her ex who genuinely tries to be her friend, her sister who tried for thirty years to apologize, and her mom.
* In the ''WesternAnimation/SpongeBobSquarePants'' episode "Squid's Defense", after learning how to defend himself through karate, Squidward goes to beat up a thug that tries to steal his groceries earlier, but finds out that they were going to return them to him. An ashamed [=SpongeBob=] and Sandy scold Squidward for using karate for vengeance and not self-defense and take off his karate belt, followed by Squidward [[DisproportionateRetribution being arrested.]]

The opposite of PunishedForSympathy where a character receives contempt from others for showing pity, kindness, and mercy to the offender. This can be one of the ways where character is MadeOutToBeAJerkass. A subtrope of TheComplainerIsAlwaysWrong. If the character has deeply injured a third party, the OrderedApology may be demanded for forgiveness. Can be due to the belief that IfYouKillHimYouWillBeJustLikeHim or IfYouTauntHimYouWillBeJustLikeHim.

One character has done wrong, which upsets or enrages another character. But the offending character sincerely apologizes to the wronged party and asks for their forgiveness and start all over again. Much to his displeasure, the wronged party [[RejectedApology rejects his apology and vows to never forgive him for what he's done]].

And along came this trope. As a result for the character's unforgiving approach and his tendency to hold a grudge, he is [[WhatTheHellHero receiving criticism and antagonism from other characters for not being forgiving to the wrongdoer]]. They knew that the person's apology was very sincere and it was the appropriate for the victim to forgive. They may know that the more the character holds a grudge, [[HeWhoFightsMonsters he will be just as bad as the one who wronged him]]. The grudgeholder may realize that the remorseful character is emotionally distraught or will become furious of his lack of forgiveness, which is a bit hypocritical considering that if he really realised that what he did was that bad, he wouldn't feel ''entitled'' to be forgiven.

* In the ''WesternAnimation/SpongeBobSquarePants'' episode "Squid's Defense", after learning how to defend himself through karate, Squidward goes to beat up a thug that tries to steal his groceries earlier, but finds out that they were going to return them to him. An ashamed [=SpongeBob=] and Sandy scold Squidward for using karate for vengeance and not self-defense and took off his karate belt, followed by Squidward being arrested.

* In Comicbook/Magneto's backstory, his wife leaves him because he killed the people who prevented him from rescuing their daughter from a fire, causing him no end of confusion.