History Main / IKEAErotica

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* Also shows up in the ''FamilyGuy'' movie. "Get in there! Get in there and... (while reading from ''The Joy of Sex'') insert your ''phal-lus'' into her ''vag-in-a!''"

* The SCPFoundation fic [[http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/union "Union"]] actually uses this for effect, since it's based on SCP-217, a virus that converts organisms into clockwork, both literally and figuratively.

* "Please put your...that! Y-your PONOS! To my...my...Here! ...My VAGOOO!!! And [[http://generationotaku.net/images/tidbits/1208/vagoo.jpg J-J-JAM IT IN!]]" MemeticMutation ahoy.

* ''NightCourt'' semi-inverted this once. Mac was discussing assembling a train set, saying "Insert tab A into slot B. Who can't do that?" and the DA (and in-house pervert) just gave him a look and said "You'd be surprised."
* Nearly OncePerEpisode on ThreesCompany.

** "Just when I think it can’t get any more intense, Mabel plunges her arm into me well past her wrist…" ...''past the wrist''? Owww... * Crosses legs.*
** I got to "volcanic crotch", and almost killed myself laughing.

** "Just when I think it can’t get any more intense, Mabel plunges her arm into me well past her wrist…" ...''past the wrist''? Owww... * Crosses legs.*

** 'Verbing a noun' is a pre-existing term in literary criticism; it simply means to make a verb out of a noun. 'He pinboarded the note', for example. Or 'he vaginaed his penis'. Ironically because they involve neologisms they are much more interesting phrases than the kind you folks are referring to as being examples of 'verbing the noun'. Shakespeare verbs nouns and nouns verbs all the time.

** And in the episode where Peter tries his hand at writing erotica, resulting in such timeless classics as ''The Hot Chick Who Was Italian or Maybe Some Kind of Spanish''. [[CrowningMomentOfFunny As read by Betty White.]]

** [[MemeticMutation I'm gong to]] [[CrackShipping ship]] [[{{Rule34}} Tifa Adil and Gundam Divider X]] [[{{Squick}} and there is nothing you can do about it].
*** Suprisingly erotic for what was essentially masturbation.

->'''Brian''': OK, insert Rod 'A' into Rod Support 'B'."\\
'''Peter''': ''(imbecilic giggling)'' [[HehHehYouSaidX That's what she]]--\\
'''Brian''': If you say "[[ThatsWhatSheSaid That's what she said]]" [[TemptingFate one more time]], [[DopeSlap I'm gonna pop you]].\\
-- ''FamilyGuy''

->There is nothing duller than dull pornography.\\
-- Agatha Christie, ''The Clocks''

* Mark Moore writes in {{Beige Prose}} and is also fond of writing boring lesbian sex. This example from [[http://www.fanfiction.net/s/3800285/9/Mobile_Suit_Gundam_Tournament Mobile Suit Gundam Tournament]] has been described by one fanfic snark community as the only sex scene in the history of erotica ever to be written in [[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Logo_programming_language LOGO]].

** [[MemeticMutation I'm gong to]] [[CrackShipping ship]] [[{{Rule34}} Tifa Adil and Gundam Divider X]] [[{{Squick}} and there is nothing you can do about it]]

---> [=HunniBunni=]: It feels like when you ''break a tie vote in the Senate''?
---> [=Born2Bone=]: Umm, listen, what I meant was...
---> [=HunniBunni=]: This is ''you'', isn't it, Al? ''ISN'T IT''?? YOU ''BASTARD''!!! YOU TOLD ME YOU WERE ATTENDING A STATE FUNERAL THIS AFTERNOON!!!
---> [=Born2Bone=]: ''Tipper''?
---> [=HunniBunni=]: Whoops.

* [[http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0445760/ The Wayward Cloud]] contains such scenes to deliver Irony and a statement against IKEA erotica.

-->'''Learner:''' ''I read modern writers, and it's "screw this", "he licked her", "she sucked that", "he bit the other", you know, "someone put it there", "he held it", I mean, where's the sensuality?

* The SoBadItsHorrible ''{{FATAL}}'' has formulae for calculating the exact measurements of a character's primary and secondary sex characteristics. Thankfully this part is optional, but it's there.

* The {{SCP Foundation}} fic [[http://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/union "Union"]] actually uses this for effect, since it's based on SCP-217, a virus that converts organisms into clockwork, both literally and figuratively.

* The {{PWP}} of certain fixations and fetishes can turn into matherotica, when the author decides that the best way to spark the reader's libido is by rattling off measurements. A blend of {{IKEAErotica}} and a failure to {{ShowDontTell}}, it misunderstands the thrill of the impossible which fuels these fantasies as "her breasts had become even bigger and heavier, growing five pounds and a full two inches in diameter in the course of one day, making her a [=62FF=]."

*** A sixtytwo inch chest would belong on a tubby woman. It's amazing how many people don't realize that the number has nothing to do with the breasts. [[hottip:* :For the record, the number is the circumference of her chest ''without'' the breasts; the letters indicate how much bigger around her breasts are compared to the chest itself. A 32C woman has the same chest circumference as, but larger breasts than, a 32B woman.]]

* Also shows up in the ''{{Family Guy}}'' movie. "Get in there! Get in there and... (while reading from ''The Joy of Sex'') insert your ''phal-lus'' into her ''vag-in-a!''"

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* The {{So Bad It's Horrible}} ''{{FATAL}}'' has formulae for calculating the exact measurements of a character's primary and secondary sex characteristics. Thankfully this part is optional, but it's there.

Named after the Swedish home furnit"ure retail chain, IKEAErotica describes the tendency of badly written sex scenes to be nothing more than "insert tab A into slot B" ''ad nauseam'', as though the readers [[ViewersAreMorons actually didn't know what goes where]]. The result is that the participants might as well be doing nothing more interesting than assembling a flat-pack wardrobe, the kind of affordable, Swedish, some-assembly-required furniture [=IKEA=] is known for. The point of erotica is to make the reader feel something of what the characters do, which in most cases will be arousal rather than boredom. It's often a sign that the writer didn't want to have a sex scene here but [[ExecutiveMeddling got overruled]], or that the writer is sexually inexperienced and writing with the aid of a biology textbook (a lot of FanFiction [[MostFanficWritersAreGirls written by 14-year-old girls]] comes into this category), making it less of a case of YouFailSexEdForever and more [[DidNotDoTheResearch You Haven't Even Taken The Course Yet]]. Examples are too numerous to list, and too forgettable to remember in any case.

->There is nothing duller than dull pornography.
-- ''Agatha Christie, "The Clocks''

-- Agatha Christie, ''The Clocks''

Named after the Swedish home furniture retail chain, IKEAErotica describes the tendency of badly written sex scenes to be nothing more than "insert tab A into slot B" ''ad nauseam'', as though the readers [[ViewersAreMorons actually didn't know what goes where]]. The result is that the participants might as well be doing nothing more interesting than assembling a flat-pack wardrobe, the kind of affordable, Swedish, some-assembly-required furniture [=IKEA=] is known for. The point of erotica is to make the reader feel something of what the characters do, which in most cases will be arousal rather than boredom. It's often a sign that the writer didn't want to have a sex scene here but [[ExecutiveMeddling got overruled]], or that the writer is sexually inexperienced and writing with the aid of a biology textbook (a lot of FanFiction [[MostFanficWritersAreGirls written by 14-year-old girls]] comes into this category), making it less of a case of YouFailSexEdForever and more [[DidNotDoTheResearch You Haven't Even Taken The Course Yet]]. Examples are too numerous to list, and too forgettable to remember in any case.

http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/ikea.jpg
[[caption-width:336:331 [[IncrediblyLamePun screws]] included.]]

-->'''Brian''': OK, insert Rod 'A' into Rod Support 'B'."
-->'''Peter''': ''(imbecilic giggling)'' [[HehHehYouSaidX That's what she]]--
-->'''Brian''': If you say "[[ThatsWhatSheSaid That's what she said]]" [[TemptingFate one more time]], [[DopeSlap I'm gonna pop you]].
-->--''FamilyGuy''

!!Honorable mention goes to:

However, it [[TropesAreNotBad can be used properly]]. Ikea Erotica has its merits as a tool of parody or simply as a means to [[GettingCrapPastTheRadar fool the censors]].

Named after the Swedish home furniture retail chain, IKEAErotica describes the tendency of badly written sex scenes to be nothing more than "insert tab A into slot B" ''ad nauseam'', as though the readers [[ViewersAreMorons actually didn't know what goes where]]. The result is that the participants might as well be doing nothing more interesting than assembling a flat-pack wardrobe, the kind of affordable, Swedish, some-assembly-required furniture [=IKEA=] is known for. The point of erotica is to make the reader feel something of what the characters do, which in most cases will be arousal rather than boredom. It's often a sign that the writer didn't want to have a sex scene here but [[ExecutiveMeddling got overruled]], or that the writer is sexually inexperienced and writing with the aid of a biology textbook (a lot of FanFiction [[MostFanficWritersAreGirls written by 14-year-old girls]] comes into this category), making it less of a case of YouFailSexEdForever and more You Haven't Even Taken The Course Yet. Examples are too numerous to list, and too forgettable to remember in any case.

* Also shows up in the ''{{Family Guy}}'' movie. "Get in there! Get in there and... (while reading from ''The Joy of Sex'') insert your ''pen-is'' into her ''vag-in-a!''"

* The TalesOfTheOtori series should get mention for its two sentence sex scenes. They all go something like: They embraced, they climaxed.
** That's not IKEA erotica. There was no insert staff A in socket B, it was more on the lines of They fucked. [[spoiler: Although the first scene is rather disturbing, the 2 protagonists have sex in the same room with a freshly killed corpse, in the castle belonging to the formerly live corpse, with guards running around trying to find one of them.]]