History Funny / VorkosiganSaga

* Miles is off on another Miles-brained scheme with Ivan in tow and skirting dangerously near to the perpetrators who will kill to keep their secret. Ivan is, as usual, worrying about the consequences of Miles' latest madness.
-->'''Miles:''' I may be panicking prematurely.\\
'''Ivan:''' I don't think so. I think you're panicking post-maturely. In fact, if you were panicking any later it would be practically posthumously. I've been panicking for days..

* A depressed, under siege Miles sits around. Ivan visits to discuss a certain situation, and says he won't be talked into whatever Miles is cooking up. Miles says "Okay, thanks." because he doesn't actually have anything planned. [[OOCIsSeriousBusiness He even apologizes for abusing Ivan's loyalty so much]]. Ivan assumes he's being snubbed, and gets offended that Miles ''isn't'' dragging him into whatever wacky hijinks he's sure Miles is up to. Miles smiles faintly at Ivan's "who does he think he is?" rant while leaving.

* A fired, depressed Miles is sits around. Ivan gets in touch says he won't be talked into whatever Miles is cooking up. Miles says "Okay." because he doesn't have anything planned. Ivan assumes he's being snubbed, and gets offended that Miles ''isn't'' dragging him into wacky hijinks. Miles smiles faintly at Ivan's "who does he think he is?" rant while leaving.

* A fired, depressed Miles is sits around. Ivan gets in touch says he won't be talked into whatever Miles is cooking up. Miles says "Okay." because he doesn't have anything planned. Ivan assumes he's being snubbed, and gets offended that Miles ''isn't'' dragging him into wacky hijinks.

** Bujold cites this exact problem when describing the writing process for ''Captain Vorpatril's Alliance'': the only way to keep Miles from taking over Ivan's book was to send Ivan to another planet. Naturally, when Ivan gets home, Miles calls him -- and while Ivan tries to ignore him, Miles uses his Imperial Auditor code to override being placed on hold, ''then'' forces Ivan and Tej to meet him and Gregor. Bujold also found another way to stymie Miles: have Aunt Alys forbid him. When Ivan worries about Miles crashing the Arqua/Vorpatril dinner party, she tells him she's ''quite'' capable of controlling her invite list. Not even Miles dares offend Vorbarr Sultana's GrandDame (and his mother's BestFriend). The rest of the book involves Simon making a secret wager with Shiv, with the PowerTrio of Alys, Udine and Moira manipulating events in the background, meaning for once in his life, Miles has no clue what's going on behind the scenes.

** Bujold cites this exact problem when describing the writing process for ''Captain Vorpatril's Alliance'': the only way to keep Miles from taking over Ivan's book was to send Ivan to another planet. Naturally, when Ivan gets home, Miles calls him -- and while Ivan tries to ignore him, Miles uses his Imperial Auditor code to override being placed on hold, ''then'' forces Ivan and Tej to meet him and Gregor. Bujold also found another way to stymie Miles: have Aunt Alys forbid him. When Ivan worries about Miles crashing the Arqua/Vorpatril dinner party, she tells him she's ''quite'' capable of controlling her invite list. Not even Miles dares offend Vorbarr Sultana's GrandDame (and his mother's BestFriend).

'''Vormuir:''' ''(from inside the chamber a few moments later))'' '''DOWRIES!''' A hundred and eighteen ''dowries''?!

'''Vormuir:''' ''(from inside the chamber a few moments later)) '''DOWRIES!''' A hundred and eighteen ''dowries''?!

* Ekaterin and Gregor's [[RefugeInAudacity ironic, outlandish solution]] to a subplot that's mentioned twice in the entire book. She proposes the solution, he makes it an Imperial Decree.

(From inside the chamber a few moments later): ''DOWRIES!'' A hundred and eighteen ''dowries''!

** "Mother, father, I'd like to introduce you to -- ''she's getting away!''"

* Gregor going awooing BigBeautifulWoman Komarran shipping heir Laisa. His tactics include planning a luncheon four days in advance, and having the ''ideal'' horse for Laisa to ride flown in from three districts over. Miles's snarky internal commentary implies that the horse is doped up to prevent it from acting out and ruining the show, the animal itself was sedated to within an inch of its life before Gregor let it anywhere near Laisa, and the Emperor is possibly using the excuse of giving her a boost into the saddle to cop a feel.

* Gregor going awooing BigBeautifulWoman Komarran shipping heir Laisa. His tactics include planning a luncheon four days in advance, and having the ''ideal'' horse for Laisa to ride flown in from three districts over. Miles's snarky internal commentary implies that the horse is doped up to prevent it from acting out and ruining the show, the animal itself was shampooed to within an inch of its life before Gregor let it anywhere near Laisa, and the Emperor is possibly using the excuse of giving her a boost into the saddle to cop a feel.

-->'''Tung:''' Who do you think you are? Lord Vorkosigan? [[note]]He meant Aral, whom Tung idolizes; still, Miles almost chokes on his food. Tung is also unaware that Aral is now Count, and that "Lord" now applies to his son.
It should also be noted that "Admiral Miles Naismith"'s very life at this point hangs on nobody realizing he's actually Miles Vorkosigan.[[/note]]

'''Duv:''' That is not fast-penta.

-->'''Tung:''' Who do you think you are? Lord Vorkosigan? [[note]]He meant Aral, whom Tung idolizes; still, Miles almost chokes on his food. Tung is also unaware that Aral is now Count, and that "Lord" now applies to his son.[[/note]]

* Right from the start, some versions of the cover have the customary 'A Miles Vorkosigan Adventure' crossed out and 'Ivan Vorpatril' scribbled in as a replacement.

** It gets referenced when Miles, Ekaterin and their children visit the Reproductive Center where his sister Aurelia is gestating in a replicator. Miles tries to be nonchalant and say it looks like an uninteresting blob. Ekaterin calls him out on his hypocrisy.

* Richars attempting to repeat the slander that Miles killed Ekaterin's husband so that she would be forced to marry him. Ekaterin begins to engage him. The speaker then objects to the chaos, but Aral gives him a signal that Miles interprets as "No, no. Let him [[HoistByHisOwnPetard hang himself]]." Ekaterin then ''proposes to Miles'', and after Miles stumblingly accepts, she gives one last middle finger to Richars with a single word: "''Twit.''" Ivan, whose POV the reader follows during the entire scene, is grinning like a loon during the entire exchange.

* Richars attempting to repeat the slander that Miles killed Ekaterin's husband so that she would be forced to marry him. Ekaterin begins to engage him. The speaker then objects to the chaos, but Aral gives him a signal that Miles interprets as "No, no. Let him [[HoistByHisOwnPetard hang himself]]." Ekaterin then ''proposes to Miles'', and after Miles stumblingly accepts, she gives one last middle finger to Richars with a single word: "''Twit.''"

** Gregor getting rid of Ekaterin's AbhorrentAdmirer by mildly [[ReassignedToAntarctica sending him away where he can be "less busy".]] His casual wrecking of Vormoncrief's life makes it funny.

** Gregor getting rid of Ekaterin's AbhorrentAdmirer by mildly [[ReassignedToAntarctica sending him away where he can be "less busy".]] His casual wrecking of Vorsoisson's life makes it funny.

** Gregor getting rid of TheGadfly by mildly [[ReassignedToAntarctica sending him away where he can be "less busy".]] His casual wrecking of Vorsoisson's life makes it funny.

** Gregor getting rid of TheGadfly by mildly [[ReassignedToAntartica sending him away where he can be "less busy".]] His casual wrecking of Vorsoisson's life makes it funny.