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'''Cyanide''': I can pronounce the word that was difficult for him to pronounce just now [[Film/MaryPoppins ("Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious")]] because [[BlatantLies IIiiii am]] [[BlatantLies not]] ''[[BlatantLies dunk.]]''\\
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'''Cyanide''': I can pronounce the word that was difficult for him to pronounce just now [[Film/MaryPoppins ("Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious")]] because [[BlatantLies IIiiii am]] [[BlatantLies am not]] ''[[BlatantLies dunk.]]''\\
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* A ZF member named Kaffe plays some soundboarded clips as the group is setting up, much to the annoyance of Soviet. Echo asks for Kaffe to play the [[CrossesTheLineTwice "ISIS Theme Tune"]]... and then Kaffe plays [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vTIIMJ9tUc8 this.]]
to:
* A ZF member named Kaffe plays some soundboarded clips as the group is setting up, much to the annoyance of Soviet. Echo asks for Kaffe to play the [[CrossesTheLineTwice "ISIS Theme Tune"]]... and then Kaffe plays [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vTIIMJ9tUc8 [[https://youtu.be/92ydUdqWE1g?si=yAoWTIJcH7Yp55LL this.]]
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* The RunningGag of Soviet getting a high rank without issue while Cyanide gets pissed due to the effort he had to put to get the same, starting with Soviet getting Master Guardian Elite, then Distinguished Master Guardian, and then Master Guardian Elite again. Though this ammount of success ends in Part 9 where he gets Silver Elite, 5 ranks below Cyanide's Gold Nova Master to the latter's joy.
to:
* The RunningGag of Soviet getting a high rank without issue while Cyanide gets pissed due to the effort he had to put to get the same, starting with Soviet getting Master Guardian Elite, then Distinguished Master Guardian, and then Master Guardian Elite again. Though this ammount amount of success ends in Part 9 where he gets Silver Elite, 5 ranks below Cyanide's Gold Nova Master to the latter's joy.
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* " They're going to B." "What are they going to be, Soviet?" [[LamePunReaction "Ugh."]]
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* This bit:
-->'''Cyanide:''' Give me bomb. Give me bomb. Give me bomb. ''(Soviet tosses Cyanide bomb)'' I flash, you run, okay?
-->'''Soviet:''' Okay.
-->'''Cyanide:''' Ready? One, two, three, go. ''(throws flashbang, Soviet runs, [[ExactWords in the opposite direction]])'' I'd like for you to know that you're a piece of human shit.
-->'''Cyanide:''' Give me bomb. Give me bomb. Give me bomb. ''(Soviet tosses Cyanide bomb)'' I flash, you run, okay?
-->'''Soviet:''' Okay.
-->'''Cyanide:''' Ready? One, two, three, go. ''(throws flashbang, Soviet runs, [[ExactWords in the opposite direction]])'' I'd like for you to know that you're a piece of human shit.
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* Cyanide's reaction to Soviet's new rank (Silver Elite to Cy's G.N.M.)
-->'''Cyanide:''' ''(laughs)'' '''''[[BigYes YEESSSSSS]]!!!''''' HE IS WHERE HE IS MEANT TO BE! ''[[ThereIsAGod The gods have responded ]]!''\\
'''Soviet:''' I don't belong down here! I'm amazing at CS:GO!\\
'''Cyanide:''' My entire life has just been validated.
-->'''Cyanide:''' ''(laughs)'' '''''[[BigYes YEESSSSSS]]!!!''''' HE IS WHERE HE IS MEANT TO BE! ''[[ThereIsAGod The gods have responded ]]!''\\
'''Soviet:''' I don't belong down here! I'm amazing at CS:GO!\\
'''Cyanide:''' My entire life has just been validated.
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** Womble notices an interesting piece of graffiti near the spawn.
---> '''Womble''': Why's [[UsefulNotes/VladimirLenin Lenin]] here? [[ARareSentence Hello, Lenin]]!\\
'''Social''': [[LampshadeHanging Did you just say hello Lenin]]?
---> '''Womble''': Why's [[UsefulNotes/VladimirLenin Lenin]] here? [[ARareSentence Hello, Lenin]]!\\
'''Social''': [[LampshadeHanging Did you just say hello Lenin]]?
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[[Funny/SovietWomble Main Page]]
!CS:GO Bullshittery
* The RunningGag of Soviet getting a high rank without issue while Cyanide gets pissed due to the effort he had to put to get the same, starting with Soviet getting Master Guardian Elite, then Distinguished Master Guardian, and then Master Guardian Elite again. Though this ammount of success ends in Part 9 where he gets Silver Elite, 5 ranks below Cyanide's Gold Nova Master to the latter's joy.
[[folder: Part 1]]
* In the beginning of one game, a random tells the team to wait for their smoke to pop and cover their path before they move out. [[EpicFail It gets intercepted by one of them.]]
--> '''Cyanide''': [[SarcasmMode We're off to a great start, guys!]]
* When Cyanide "demonstrates how to correctly use a P90", he does so by accidentally reloading when an enemy is in front of him, who instantly guns him down.
* During a warm-up session, Soviet [[TheGadfly trails behind Cyanide to repeatedly stab him over and over]] before [[LaserGuidedKarma somehow getting shot by Edberg]] ''through'' Cyanide.
* "[[TechnoBabble Inferno destrats, err... planetario three places in left, plus left at Suzy plan.]]"
-->'''Edberg''': I have no idea what he just said.
* The Egg story. Just the whole Egg story.
-->[[ItMakesSenseInContext "Hey, baby, sexy egg..."]]
* After Soviet gets shot by a sniper:
--> '''Soviet''': Oh god, I got AWP'd, how's that? Is that helpful?\\
'''[=GlasS_=]''': That's [[IncrediblyLamePun awp]]fully helpful.\\
'''Soviet''': [[LamePunReaction Oh, fuck you.]]\\
'''[=GlasS_=]''': Sorry.
* "[[BlackComedy Rape (noun)]]: [[BuffySpeak Penis somewhere not good]]"
* "There's no one there, hint hint." "Stop ghosting! It's not fun!" Cut to 60 seconds later where [[LiteralMinded everyone is making spooky ghost noises]], including an especially bassy "fat ghost" and one guy who makes... [[TheImmodestOrgasm suggestive noises.]]
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 2]]
* At one point, Cyanide asks for Soviet's gun, and insists because Soviet's [[BlatantLies "at low health" despite blatantly being at 100%.]] Soviet retorts by instead giving him a live smoke grenade.
* Cyanide's brief stint [[VideoGameCrueltyPotential with admin privileges.]]
--> '''Edberg''': Night time.\\
'''Cyanide''': Daytime!\\
'''Edberg''': Night time.\\
'''Cyanide''': Daytime... ''(blinds Soviet)''
** Immediately followed by Cyanide slapping then eventually slaying Soviet to his audible annoyance and Cyanide's glee.
* "This isn't the killin' house anymore! This is real life!"
-->'''Quebec''': This isn't the killin' house. It's a killin' bungalow.
* "Throwing fire!"
-->'''Quebec''': He's a level 3 mage!
* Soviet engages an enemy, and they both [[ATeamFiring spray several bullets from their automatic weapons while standing a few feet from each other, both completely failing to hit each other]] before retreating.
-->'''Soviet''': [[EpicFail Oh my god, it's like when two retards collide]].
* In one game, Soviet picks up an enemy's AK-47, followed by his clan's restrained giggling. 23 seconds later, he engages an enemy and realizes why:
-->'''Soviet''': ''[[ItWorksBetterWithBullets (click click click)]]'' [[OhCrap Oh god,]] [[FailedASpotCheck THE GUN'S GOT NO AMMO!]] ''(sniped as the chat bursts into laughter)''
* Cyanide setting his mouse sensitivity to 100, [[HilarityEnsues which goes as well as you'd expect.]]
-->'''Cyanide''': We're in good hands... I've figured out my aim, it's just-- ''(sees an enemy and wildly opens fire)'' [[SuddenlyShouting — SMALL MOVEMENTS! SMALL ADJUSTMENTS!]] ''(gets shot)''
* Cyanide changes his name [[SmallNameBigEgo "to something that more accurately reflects my stature in this community"]]: "ZF CYANIDE RECOGNISE ME IM FAMUS". Later, [[TheFriendNobodyLikes he nearly-instantly gets unanimously votebanned by his teammates.]]
* At the end of the video, Soviet manages to sneakily [[InTheBack kill Moogle with a stab to the back without him noticing]]. Later, Cyanide tries to do the same thing and gets within stabbing range, but Moogle simply notices him and blasts his head off.
--> '''Cyanide''': [[RageQuit I quit, I hate this game.]]
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 3]]
* During a game, Cyanide realizes they left the bomb behind, which was his job:
-->'''Soviet''': Whenever you do something awesome, it's [[ItsAllAboutMe "Oh, look at me!"]], and then whenever you fuck up, it's [[NeverMyFault "Oh, we're a team."]]\\
'''Cyanide''': [[BlatantLies That's how teamwork works!]]
* After Edberg picks up an enemy AWP for the next round, three of his teammates clamor for it, undercut with sounds of [[WesternAnimation/FindingNemo "MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE!"]] [[TheGadfly He proceeds to just throw it on a roof.]]
-->'''Cyanide:''' [[{{Angrish}} BASTARD MOTHER TACO FUCK]]--
* As Soviet picks up a new gun:
---> '''Teammate''': [[CallBack Does this one have ammo in it, Soviet?]]\\
'''Soviet''': Shut up.
** Afterwards, Soviet empties out his gun's magazine right before he dies. 20 seconds later, Cyanide picks it up in the middle of a firefight, and it goes as well as you'd expect.
---> '''Soviet''': How does it feel, Cyanide?\\
'''Cyanide''': Why would you drop a gun with no ammo?!\\
'''Soviet''': [[CaptainObvious 'cause I died!]]
* Cyanide's story of how he got a new girl in Teamspeak named Elenii and a regular named Echo together in a room [[MakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext and had them participate in a Jewish wedding.]]
--> '''Soviet''': [[LetMeGetThisStraight So, sorry, bear with me for a minute,]] are you saying you basically took an Englishman and German woman and forced them to partake in a Jewish ShotgunWedding?\\
'''Cyanide''': Yes.\\
'''Soviet''': And did she say yes?\\
'''Cyanide''': Yes. It irritated the shit out of--\\
'''Echo''': No no no, ''no one'' said yes, it was just a glass smashed and a mazel tov and everyone said "Yep!"
* After everyone's attempts to "juggle" their guns by throwing it in the air to catch it again, one of them decides to go the extra mile and ''shoot'' his gun mid-air. [[EpicFail It flies off onto the roof of a multi-story building.]]
* A ZF member named Kaffe plays some soundboarded clips as the group is setting up, much to the annoyance of Soviet. Echo asks for Kaffe to play the [[CrossesTheLineTwice "ISIS Theme Tune"]]... and then Kaffe plays [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vTIIMJ9tUc8 this.]]
--> '''Soviet''': You and I are gotta have a bit of a talk about cultural sensitivity.
** Later on, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qExK9TlJqRY Kaffe plays this]], which sends everybody, Soviet included, into hysterics. Kaffe's statement afterwards is both hilarious and true.
---> '''Kaffe''': It was Twitch friendly because it was censored.
* The entire second half of the video is dedicated to a session involving a DrinkingGame: Drink for every death, and if someone gets a knife kill, everyone drinks (later, Cyanide adds that getting killed by a knife calls for 3 drinks). [[AlcoholInducedIdiocy It doesn't take long for things to go hilariously wrong.]]
** Throughout the game, Blair repeatedly complains about his liquor, [[ATankardOfMooseUrine a cucumber and spinach vodka called "Oddka."]]
---> '''Blair''': Oh, mine is quite alright, actually. ''(Beat)'' Oh! Never mind!
** Soviet started with Southern Comfort, then he went on to a honey Jack Daniels, but when he ran out of that, all he had left was Tequila, and nothing to make it more bearable, just ''neat'' Tequila. [[ThisIsGonnaSuck Everyone sympathizes with him]].
** 9 shots in, Soviet begins giggling uncontrollably. It's quite contagious. It gets even worse as he has to take ''even more.''
** 15 shots in, Cyanide begins ragging on Soviet:
---> '''Cyanide''': ''[[HypocriticalHumor (slurred and slowly)]]'' Soviet, you can't hold your alcohol worth a shit.\\
'''Teammate''': [[LampshadeHanging Cyanide, you're fucking slurring yourself!]]\\
'''Cyanide''': I can pronounce the word that was difficult for him to pronounce just now [[Film/MaryPoppins ("Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious")]] because [[BlatantLies IIiiii am]] [[BlatantLies not]] ''[[BlatantLies dunk.]]''\\
'''Cyanide''': THIS, IS JUST, A FORM OF COMMUNICATION, THAT LETS ME, TALK TO, EASIER...
** A funny background event: One of the players on the opposing team can be seen in the chat repeatedly claiming that the ZF team are hackers and telling them to turn off their hacks. At several points, the rest of his team join in. This starts around the time Soviet reaches ''12 shots'', and is barely coherent. Apparently, the other team are so bad that they have trouble dealing with several ''extremely'' drunk guys.
** How does the game end? At ''18+ shots'', Soviet's player character is simply staring off into the sky. Apparently, Soviet got so drunk he physically wandered off the stream and forgot he was doing one.
** Then there's the follow-up, posted in a (now-removed) Facebook post:
--->''"So...last night we decided to play some Counter Strike. With the rule "take a shot of whiskey every time you die". Whiskey quickly became Tequila. I have made many mistakes in my life. And last night is clearly making the top 10. I've just gone through the worst hangover a human being is capable of experiencing. I don't even know how many units of alcohol I consumed. I'm being told I didn't even stop the stream, I just wandered off. I found a soggy and defrosted bag of peas in one of my cupboards that drunk me moved there for some reason. I've been going between bed and bathroom every 20 minutes to vomit anything I tried to eat or drink. And at it's worst point, I was head down over the toilet basin alternating between sobbing, puking, [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking and swearing death on a packet of Nestle Whole Grain Clusters because I thought the title "Rise and Shine" was mocking me]]. Yeah...if anyone is near Brighton, could they come round my flat and beat me to death with a spade. Thanks."''
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 4]]
* Soviet picks up an AWP at the end of the round and asks if anyone wants it. Once everyone asks for it, he decides he's going to keep it for the round.
-->'''[=CartonWaffle=]''': Alright, then.\\
''(3 seconds later)''\\
''(cut to Soviet shot by his teammates)''
* This simple bit:
-->'''Soviet''': Tunnel!\\
''(Cyanide gets close and instantly gets killed)''\\
'''Soviet''': ''(turning around)'' [[AttackAttackRetreatRetreat The other one!]]
* The entire [[https://youtu.be/JRiLk9qw59Y?t=402 "sound test"]] incident:
-->'''Soviet''': What's automatic voice gain control-- Oh... [[TemptingFate Can you guys all start speaking? Simultaneously]]?
* The entire bit where Cyanide and [[InsistentTerminology Cyanide's Hot Girlfriend]] are playing in tandem with a single mouse and keyboard. Considering how Cyanide's Hot Girlfriend seems pretty unfamiliar with gaming, it goes as chaotically hilarious as you'd expect.
** Cyanide makes a deal with his girlfriend at the beginning:
-->'''Cyanide:''' We'll do a reward system; every time you kill someone you get a bite out of the cheese sandwich.\\
'''Cyanide's Hot Girlfriend:''' I take psychology, I know how it works, thank you. ''(beat)'' I use it on you.\\
'''Cyanide:''' What do you mean, you use it on me?\\
'''Cyanide's Hot Girlfriend:''' Never mind, just play.
** During one instance where Cyanide's Hot Girlfriend has the mouse, she ends up aiming at completely the wrong space ''in the sky'' and gets both of them killed[[note]]A few commenters have noticed that [[EntertaininglyWrong her aim is based on the very end of the first-person gun barrel on the bottom-right of the screen rather than the crosshairs in the center]][[/note]], [[FunnyBackgroundEvent but the text chat pops up with Edberg saying "still better than womble".]]
--->'''Cyanide''': Move the mouse so this is on top of the person, and then click the button to kill him, okay?\\
'''Cyanide's Hot Girlfriend''': ''(understanding)'' Ooooh... got it.
* At the very end, Womble's mouse stops working in the middle of the game, leaving him to be unable to aim or turn around until he gets killed. In spite of this, he ends up getting ''promoted'' to Distinguished Master Guardian, [[BigWhat which ends up baffling him and everyone else in the chat.]]
* Nep and her [[TheTease "stretching" noises.]]
-->'''Nep''': [[InnocentFanserviceGirl I'm getting lots of friend invites right now. Is it because of your stream?]]
* During the group's time in the lobby, Soviet tests out automatic voice gain control by having the others speak, leading to an OverlyLongGag, starting with Cyanide making weird noises while Gambit and Edberg throw insults Soviet's way before devolving into repeating the word [[RunningGag "faggot"]] towards Soviet, leading him to mute his channel, before unmuting to hear them still going, to Kaffe's confusion, muting again then unmuting to hear them ''still'' going, [[RuleOfThree then muting once more and unmuting]] to hear Edberg making what was [[FunWithSubtitles captioned as "weird sex noises"]] to Soviet's amusement and confusion as he mutes one more time before unmuting to a barrage of memes as Soviet [[SarcasmMode thanks them for the test]].
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 5]]
* As the game is setting up, Cyanide announces he's "going to do something people do every day." Cut to sounds of him ''[[ToiletHumor pissing on stream in front of 1000+ people.]]''
-->'''Soviet''': NO WAY. ''[[PunctuatedForEmphasis NO. FUCKING. WAY.]]'' YOU ARE A FUCKING ANIMAL. YOU'RE AN ABSOLUTE DISGRACE!
* Cyanide's abrupt decision to rebrand himself as the NiceGuy as a response to a Reddit thread. It lasts for all of seven seconds before Nep announces [[InnocentInnuendo "I'm peeking Banana."]]
** Speaking of innuendo...
-->'''Nep:''' Why do I suck so much today? ''(cue several seconds of uncharacteristic silence)''\\
'''Soviet:''' No one? No one's gonna jump on that?
* Soviet comes up with a rather bizarre theory:
--> '''Soviet''': I find that I often do better at ''VideoGame/CounterStrike'' [[ToiletHumor whenever I really, really need to poo.]] I think there's a correlation there.\\
'''Gambit''': So you're saying you need [[AssShove something up your bumhole?]]\\
'''Edberg''': Well that doesn't really matter, you're always full of shit!
* Soviet complains he doesn't want to go to work, to which Cyanide responds that as a streamer, playing games and recording is his "work."
-->'''Cyanide:''' You are working right now. That pisses me the fuck off.
** Later:
-->'''Soviet:''' Can you stop being so difficult to work with? I'm gonna complain to HR. I am a professional CS:GO player and you are not. As in, I do this for a living, okay?\\
''(Soviet gets killed at a later round)''\\
'''Cyanide:''' "Professional CS:GO player," he says.\\
'''Soviet:''' I never said I was any good!
* At the end of a round, Sheep picks up a Negev for Cyanide. [[TheGadfly Then he immediately throws it over a fence,]] sending Cyanide flying into a white-hot RageQuit.
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 6]]
* The very beginning of the video, which may as well be an EstablishingSeriesMoment (and is the first video found upon clicking onto [=SovietWomble's=] channel):
---> '''Teammate 1''': The key to winning a game of CS:GO is to keep good positivity and trust each other.\\
'''Entire Team''': Shut the fuck up.
** A similar moment happens soon after:
---> '''Soviet''': Most of us met in ''VideoGame/DayZ'' and we've formed an everlasting bond of friendship and love and respect...\\
'''Edberg''': Fuck you.\\
'''Soviet''': Yes...
* "That round only took 34 seconds. Name of [=SovietWomble's=] sex tape, volume 3."
* Cyanide: "Sovieeeet! Cake called me fat!"
-->'''Cake''': I did not!\\
'''Soviet''': You ''are'' fat.\\
'''Cyanide''': ''[[InelegantBlubbering (loud wailing)]]''\\
'''[=TeamSpeak=] Announcer''': User left your channel.\\
'''[=TheGuyNamedWaffle=]''': Not sure if he RageQuit or [[ExtremeOmnivore ate the microphone...]]
* During a clever bit of editing, Soviet friendly fires Nep, causing her to turn around with a [[EtTuBrute "Look of betrayal"]] and get killed by a shot to the back. All accompanied by a dramatic piano.
-->'''Soviet''': Sorry, Nep.\\
'''Nep''': Are you serious?!
* Soviet and Kas approach a doorway:
--> '''Soviet''': You first.\\
'''Kas''': Why me?\\
'''Soviet''': Women and children first.\\
'''Kas''': I have a... ''(sighs, then [[DisproportionateRetribution guns Soviet down]])''\\
'''Soviet''': A-hahahaha! BITCH!
* The clan has a game with two randoms who are speaking in voice chat. Then Cyanide and Nep proceed to spam the voice chat in Russian accents.
--> '''Nep''': Motherfucker, I will report you to my boyfriend, do you know who my boyfriend is? It's [[UsefulNotes/VladimirPutin Putin!]]
* Unlike Soviet's [[RunningGag usual problem with thrown grenades,]] one snippet features him throwing a smoke grenade that accidentally hits a small bar of a metal sign, sending it falling through the platforms. Thankfully for him, nobody else sees it.
* As the clan is organizing in Teamspeak, Cyanide is texting:
--> '''Cyanide''': How do you spell "luscious"?\\
'''Soviet''': L-U-S-C-C-I-O-U-S-T.\\
''(beat)''\\
'''Cyanide''': [[DelayedReaction ...what!? Fuck off!]]
* Cyanide is the last man standing:
--> '''Nep''': I swear to god if you don't get this, I will ''[[ThatCameOutWrong fuck]]''[[note]]she meant to say "beat"[[/note]] [[ThatCameOutWrong the shit out of you!]]\\
'''Cyanide''': Oh OKAY! I am not fucking... ''(completely disarms himself and charges the enemy)'' COME 'ERE! COME 'ERE! ''(dies)''
* "Honestly, the fucking Mars Curiosity Rover gets better ping than I do!"
* During one game where Soviet is on high ground and armed with a [[GatlingGood Negev]], Nep gets suddenly knifed by an enemy and prompts Soviet to turn around [[MoreDakka and start spraying out the window]]. [[TooDumbToLive Said enemy proceeds to jump up into his line of fire]] ''[[TooDumbToLive three times]]'' [[TooDumbToLive and dies]].
* Soviet picks up a [[LittleUselessGun R8 Revolver]] for one game, and after mentioning he's never gotten a kill with it, Cyanide challenges him to get one kill in the round in exchange for subscribing to him for a month. Soviet takes him up on his offer, but after seeing [[JokeWeapon how crap it is in combat]] and several back-and-forths on formation, [[ExactWords Soviet shoots and kills Cyanide on the basis that it counted as a kill]]. After a loud and frustrated squabble on the terms, Cyanide gives into his word and subscribes.
* While in the lobby, Soviet tells the chat the purpose of the stream, that they are raising money for disabled gamers, though he does make a jab at Cyanide by clarifying that he meant physically handicapped rather than mentally like Cyanide, [[ImStandingRightHere while Cyanide can hear him]].
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 7]]
* "Why do you have a Deagle, Moogle?"
--> '''Moogle''': Because it's Thursday.\\
''(beat)''\\
'''Soviet''': ''(laughs)'' What?
* "Cyanide, that's a good point, we now need to reveal that we're the owners of CSGOLOTTERY.CO.UK.ORG, don't we, yes?"
* The moment when Edberg sees a target's silhouette through smoke and he shoots, but then it turns out it's Moogle, getting him banned.
* The rather [[OverlyLongGag extended]] sequence of Cyanide relaying random fun facts to annoy the ZF clan.
---> '''Cyanide''': He's on Z! [[TooMuchInformation And a tapir has the largest penis-to-body ratio of any animal!]]
** Other players also get in on the action:
--->'''Moogle''': Did you know the whale's average penis size is about 8 metres?\\
'''Nep''': Would you be surprised if I said yes, I knew that?\\
'''Moogle''': No. ''(Womble laughs)''
** After several minutes, the entire chat gets fed up:
---> '''Soviet''': Unsubscribe! Unsubscribe!\\
'''Cyanide''': You have unsubscribed from Cyanide Fun Facts!\\
'''Soviet''': Thank you!\\
'''Cyanide''': [[HereWeGoAgain You have now subscribed to Cyanide Gorilla Facts! Did you know—]]\\
'''Soviet''': ''NOOOO, NOOOO, NOOOO--''
* At one point, Nep gets disconnected, so Womble had [[TheCutie Cake]] be "the eye-candy" for the meantime. He asks her to [[CallBack "moan seductively for the audience"]]... resulting in [[HellIsThatNoise what sounds like a soft ghost wail]].
-->'''Soviet''': ''(laughs)'' What was that? I said "moan seductively," not have a fucking seizure.
* "Someone in my chat is called 'Womble's Dignity' and he just timed out." [[IResembleThatRemark This is said moments before]] Soviet comes across a prone enemy, gets up close, but then [[EpicFail the enemy unknowingly moves out of the way, notices Soviet and kills him.]]
* Cyanide, Gambit, Edberg and the rest of the clan decide to do another "sound test" like Womble asked them to do at an earlier Bullshittery episode. As they make random noises and run off into the distance, Soviet can only remark:
-->'''Soviet:''' Beset, on all sides, by idiots.
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 8]]
* Near the beginning, Cyanide begins with [[CallBack "Did you know?"]] [[WeAreNotGoingThroughThatAgain before everybody frantically tells him to stop.]]
* Cyanide, mocking Edberg reaching Global Elite (for the second time): "I'm ''globul''."
--->"What? He's global, he doesn't need to hear."
* The revelation that [[TheUnintelligible Nevil]] ''types'' in broken English.
---> "i still not BOTTOM FARGH"
** In a very CrossesTheLineTwice bit of humor, the clan remembers that Nevil is divorced.
---> '''Soviet''': They had communication trouble.\\
''(beat, before abruptly cutting to the next scene)''
*** During this particular moment, [[FunnyBackgroundEvent Nevil's message in the bottom-left chat reads "get a a KILL SOVIET"]].
** Later, Nevil attempts to save[[labelnote:*]]Try to survive until the next round to keep a favored weapon[[/labelnote]], [[PlayerTic casually unloading his bullets]] when the enemy wins as he waits for the next round. The instant he runs out and before the round begins, he gets gibbed by an enemy out of nowhere, causing the entire chat to burst into laughter.
* Moogle invites Soviet to see something mind-blowing during the warm-up: [[MundaneObjectAmazement the second-floor interior of a building that most people miss.]] Moogle expresses disappointment for Soviet not appreciating it as much, leading to a brief argument of how anyone could see it just from entering the room, then later as they're at spawn:
--> '''Soviet''': Can I blow your mind? [[DeadpanSnarker Look, there's an APC right over there.]]\\
'''Moogle''': [[MundaneObjectAmazement Noooo way!]]\\
'''Soviet''': The things you notice when you have ''eyes.''
* "dis game is like your mother. its a shit."
* The clan invites a new player to join in a game. It's '''UsefulNotes/{{Jesus}}'''.
--> '''Jesus''': Just bear in mind, it will take me three days to respawn.
* The entire bit about Soviet being subbed on Twitch by "Womble's Left Nipple", [[ItMakesSenseInContext leading to a brief panic when he realizes his nipples are asymmetrical.]]
* After Soviet is the last person alive and plants the bomb, he waits to find the last two enemies. When they show up, they simultaneously open fire on Soviet, then ''[[ATeamFiring proceed to miss nearly every shot]]'' as Soviet takes them both down. This is framed with a dramatic closeup, slow motion, and is inexplicably underscored with [[Franchise/PowerRangers "Go Go Power Rangers"]].
** He then proceeds to do very well in the following matches, while [[TheAce Edberg]] does poorly.
--> '''Cyanide:''' WHY ARE THEY SO SHIT? WHEN IT'S YOU?! WHY CAN'T THEY DO THAT? [[ItsAllAboutMe WHEN IT'S ME?!]]
--> '''Moog:''' [[LampshadeHanging Why do we never get shit like that?]] It's like you can see an invisible hand turn down the difficulty just for Soviet.
** Case in point, during a round Soviet tries to defuse the bomb... only for an enemy to walk up and ''cover him'' defusing the very bomb he's supposed to protect.
* [[BigEater Cyanide]] eats during the game, and in his words, "When I'm feeling sensual, I become [[TheImmodestOrgasm vocal."]] At one point, Soviet pulls out his dedicated "mute Cyanide" button on his keyboard.
* During a couple of rounds, Soviet's teammates ask him to buy them certain weapons. In response, Soviet does buy the weapons, but then tosses them off the play area. The second time, after tossing Nep's requested [=USPS=], Edberg asks Soviet to throw his AK in the air under the guise of juggling it, giving Nep the opportunity to pick it up after Soviet falls for it.
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 9]]
* When a match is down to the last teammate, Nep says "You can do it, I believe in you." ''Before she's even done talking'', the teammate is gunned down by an enemy.
--> '''Nep:''' Nevermind.
* Soviet keeps trying to prefire. He ''repeatedly'' hits the wall instead.
* Nep wonders if Soviet's trying to shoot a shape around her.
--> '''Soviet:''' No, if I had to shoot a shape around you, it'd be wider.
--> '''Nep:''' ''realizes what he just said; promptly guns Soviet down''
* Soviet asks how someone's been.
--> ''Aaaaaaaagggggggghhhhhhhh!''
--> '''Soviet:''' A good Monday, then?
* Soviet discovers that the crosshair he's been using for ''years'' was actually horrible, given as a joke by Cyanide.
* Digby is excited to have gotten two kills, declaring that he's no longer terrible ... only to discover the one player he was better than was a bot.
* At the end of a match, Soviet, no longer having need for the grenade he was cooking, just tosses it away. It hits Cyanide, killing him.
--> '''Soviet:''' Well, it did some good in the end.
--> '''Cyanide:''' FUUUUUUU-
[[/folder]]
!CS:GO Bullshittery
* The RunningGag of Soviet getting a high rank without issue while Cyanide gets pissed due to the effort he had to put to get the same, starting with Soviet getting Master Guardian Elite, then Distinguished Master Guardian, and then Master Guardian Elite again. Though this ammount of success ends in Part 9 where he gets Silver Elite, 5 ranks below Cyanide's Gold Nova Master to the latter's joy.
[[folder: Part 1]]
* In the beginning of one game, a random tells the team to wait for their smoke to pop and cover their path before they move out. [[EpicFail It gets intercepted by one of them.]]
--> '''Cyanide''': [[SarcasmMode We're off to a great start, guys!]]
* When Cyanide "demonstrates how to correctly use a P90", he does so by accidentally reloading when an enemy is in front of him, who instantly guns him down.
* During a warm-up session, Soviet [[TheGadfly trails behind Cyanide to repeatedly stab him over and over]] before [[LaserGuidedKarma somehow getting shot by Edberg]] ''through'' Cyanide.
* "[[TechnoBabble Inferno destrats, err... planetario three places in left, plus left at Suzy plan.]]"
-->'''Edberg''': I have no idea what he just said.
* The Egg story. Just the whole Egg story.
-->[[ItMakesSenseInContext "Hey, baby, sexy egg..."]]
* After Soviet gets shot by a sniper:
--> '''Soviet''': Oh god, I got AWP'd, how's that? Is that helpful?\\
'''[=GlasS_=]''': That's [[IncrediblyLamePun awp]]fully helpful.\\
'''Soviet''': [[LamePunReaction Oh, fuck you.]]\\
'''[=GlasS_=]''': Sorry.
* "[[BlackComedy Rape (noun)]]: [[BuffySpeak Penis somewhere not good]]"
* "There's no one there, hint hint." "Stop ghosting! It's not fun!" Cut to 60 seconds later where [[LiteralMinded everyone is making spooky ghost noises]], including an especially bassy "fat ghost" and one guy who makes... [[TheImmodestOrgasm suggestive noises.]]
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 2]]
* At one point, Cyanide asks for Soviet's gun, and insists because Soviet's [[BlatantLies "at low health" despite blatantly being at 100%.]] Soviet retorts by instead giving him a live smoke grenade.
* Cyanide's brief stint [[VideoGameCrueltyPotential with admin privileges.]]
--> '''Edberg''': Night time.\\
'''Cyanide''': Daytime!\\
'''Edberg''': Night time.\\
'''Cyanide''': Daytime... ''(blinds Soviet)''
** Immediately followed by Cyanide slapping then eventually slaying Soviet to his audible annoyance and Cyanide's glee.
* "This isn't the killin' house anymore! This is real life!"
-->'''Quebec''': This isn't the killin' house. It's a killin' bungalow.
* "Throwing fire!"
-->'''Quebec''': He's a level 3 mage!
* Soviet engages an enemy, and they both [[ATeamFiring spray several bullets from their automatic weapons while standing a few feet from each other, both completely failing to hit each other]] before retreating.
-->'''Soviet''': [[EpicFail Oh my god, it's like when two retards collide]].
* In one game, Soviet picks up an enemy's AK-47, followed by his clan's restrained giggling. 23 seconds later, he engages an enemy and realizes why:
-->'''Soviet''': ''[[ItWorksBetterWithBullets (click click click)]]'' [[OhCrap Oh god,]] [[FailedASpotCheck THE GUN'S GOT NO AMMO!]] ''(sniped as the chat bursts into laughter)''
* Cyanide setting his mouse sensitivity to 100, [[HilarityEnsues which goes as well as you'd expect.]]
-->'''Cyanide''': We're in good hands... I've figured out my aim, it's just-- ''(sees an enemy and wildly opens fire)'' [[SuddenlyShouting — SMALL MOVEMENTS! SMALL ADJUSTMENTS!]] ''(gets shot)''
* Cyanide changes his name [[SmallNameBigEgo "to something that more accurately reflects my stature in this community"]]: "ZF CYANIDE RECOGNISE ME IM FAMUS". Later, [[TheFriendNobodyLikes he nearly-instantly gets unanimously votebanned by his teammates.]]
* At the end of the video, Soviet manages to sneakily [[InTheBack kill Moogle with a stab to the back without him noticing]]. Later, Cyanide tries to do the same thing and gets within stabbing range, but Moogle simply notices him and blasts his head off.
--> '''Cyanide''': [[RageQuit I quit, I hate this game.]]
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 3]]
* During a game, Cyanide realizes they left the bomb behind, which was his job:
-->'''Soviet''': Whenever you do something awesome, it's [[ItsAllAboutMe "Oh, look at me!"]], and then whenever you fuck up, it's [[NeverMyFault "Oh, we're a team."]]\\
'''Cyanide''': [[BlatantLies That's how teamwork works!]]
* After Edberg picks up an enemy AWP for the next round, three of his teammates clamor for it, undercut with sounds of [[WesternAnimation/FindingNemo "MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE! MINE!"]] [[TheGadfly He proceeds to just throw it on a roof.]]
-->'''Cyanide:''' [[{{Angrish}} BASTARD MOTHER TACO FUCK]]--
* As Soviet picks up a new gun:
---> '''Teammate''': [[CallBack Does this one have ammo in it, Soviet?]]\\
'''Soviet''': Shut up.
** Afterwards, Soviet empties out his gun's magazine right before he dies. 20 seconds later, Cyanide picks it up in the middle of a firefight, and it goes as well as you'd expect.
---> '''Soviet''': How does it feel, Cyanide?\\
'''Cyanide''': Why would you drop a gun with no ammo?!\\
'''Soviet''': [[CaptainObvious 'cause I died!]]
* Cyanide's story of how he got a new girl in Teamspeak named Elenii and a regular named Echo together in a room [[MakesJustAsMuchSenseInContext and had them participate in a Jewish wedding.]]
--> '''Soviet''': [[LetMeGetThisStraight So, sorry, bear with me for a minute,]] are you saying you basically took an Englishman and German woman and forced them to partake in a Jewish ShotgunWedding?\\
'''Cyanide''': Yes.\\
'''Soviet''': And did she say yes?\\
'''Cyanide''': Yes. It irritated the shit out of--\\
'''Echo''': No no no, ''no one'' said yes, it was just a glass smashed and a mazel tov and everyone said "Yep!"
* After everyone's attempts to "juggle" their guns by throwing it in the air to catch it again, one of them decides to go the extra mile and ''shoot'' his gun mid-air. [[EpicFail It flies off onto the roof of a multi-story building.]]
* A ZF member named Kaffe plays some soundboarded clips as the group is setting up, much to the annoyance of Soviet. Echo asks for Kaffe to play the [[CrossesTheLineTwice "ISIS Theme Tune"]]... and then Kaffe plays [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vTIIMJ9tUc8 this.]]
--> '''Soviet''': You and I are gotta have a bit of a talk about cultural sensitivity.
** Later on, [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qExK9TlJqRY Kaffe plays this]], which sends everybody, Soviet included, into hysterics. Kaffe's statement afterwards is both hilarious and true.
---> '''Kaffe''': It was Twitch friendly because it was censored.
* The entire second half of the video is dedicated to a session involving a DrinkingGame: Drink for every death, and if someone gets a knife kill, everyone drinks (later, Cyanide adds that getting killed by a knife calls for 3 drinks). [[AlcoholInducedIdiocy It doesn't take long for things to go hilariously wrong.]]
** Throughout the game, Blair repeatedly complains about his liquor, [[ATankardOfMooseUrine a cucumber and spinach vodka called "Oddka."]]
---> '''Blair''': Oh, mine is quite alright, actually. ''(Beat)'' Oh! Never mind!
** Soviet started with Southern Comfort, then he went on to a honey Jack Daniels, but when he ran out of that, all he had left was Tequila, and nothing to make it more bearable, just ''neat'' Tequila. [[ThisIsGonnaSuck Everyone sympathizes with him]].
** 9 shots in, Soviet begins giggling uncontrollably. It's quite contagious. It gets even worse as he has to take ''even more.''
** 15 shots in, Cyanide begins ragging on Soviet:
---> '''Cyanide''': ''[[HypocriticalHumor (slurred and slowly)]]'' Soviet, you can't hold your alcohol worth a shit.\\
'''Teammate''': [[LampshadeHanging Cyanide, you're fucking slurring yourself!]]\\
'''Cyanide''': I can pronounce the word that was difficult for him to pronounce just now [[Film/MaryPoppins ("Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious")]] because [[BlatantLies IIiiii am]] [[BlatantLies not]] ''[[BlatantLies dunk.]]''\\
'''Cyanide''': THIS, IS JUST, A FORM OF COMMUNICATION, THAT LETS ME, TALK TO, EASIER...
** A funny background event: One of the players on the opposing team can be seen in the chat repeatedly claiming that the ZF team are hackers and telling them to turn off their hacks. At several points, the rest of his team join in. This starts around the time Soviet reaches ''12 shots'', and is barely coherent. Apparently, the other team are so bad that they have trouble dealing with several ''extremely'' drunk guys.
** How does the game end? At ''18+ shots'', Soviet's player character is simply staring off into the sky. Apparently, Soviet got so drunk he physically wandered off the stream and forgot he was doing one.
** Then there's the follow-up, posted in a (now-removed) Facebook post:
--->''"So...last night we decided to play some Counter Strike. With the rule "take a shot of whiskey every time you die". Whiskey quickly became Tequila. I have made many mistakes in my life. And last night is clearly making the top 10. I've just gone through the worst hangover a human being is capable of experiencing. I don't even know how many units of alcohol I consumed. I'm being told I didn't even stop the stream, I just wandered off. I found a soggy and defrosted bag of peas in one of my cupboards that drunk me moved there for some reason. I've been going between bed and bathroom every 20 minutes to vomit anything I tried to eat or drink. And at it's worst point, I was head down over the toilet basin alternating between sobbing, puking, [[ArsonMurderAndJaywalking and swearing death on a packet of Nestle Whole Grain Clusters because I thought the title "Rise and Shine" was mocking me]]. Yeah...if anyone is near Brighton, could they come round my flat and beat me to death with a spade. Thanks."''
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 4]]
* Soviet picks up an AWP at the end of the round and asks if anyone wants it. Once everyone asks for it, he decides he's going to keep it for the round.
-->'''[=CartonWaffle=]''': Alright, then.\\
''(3 seconds later)''\\
''(cut to Soviet shot by his teammates)''
* This simple bit:
-->'''Soviet''': Tunnel!\\
''(Cyanide gets close and instantly gets killed)''\\
'''Soviet''': ''(turning around)'' [[AttackAttackRetreatRetreat The other one!]]
* The entire [[https://youtu.be/JRiLk9qw59Y?t=402 "sound test"]] incident:
-->'''Soviet''': What's automatic voice gain control-- Oh... [[TemptingFate Can you guys all start speaking? Simultaneously]]?
* The entire bit where Cyanide and [[InsistentTerminology Cyanide's Hot Girlfriend]] are playing in tandem with a single mouse and keyboard. Considering how Cyanide's Hot Girlfriend seems pretty unfamiliar with gaming, it goes as chaotically hilarious as you'd expect.
** Cyanide makes a deal with his girlfriend at the beginning:
-->'''Cyanide:''' We'll do a reward system; every time you kill someone you get a bite out of the cheese sandwich.\\
'''Cyanide's Hot Girlfriend:''' I take psychology, I know how it works, thank you. ''(beat)'' I use it on you.\\
'''Cyanide:''' What do you mean, you use it on me?\\
'''Cyanide's Hot Girlfriend:''' Never mind, just play.
** During one instance where Cyanide's Hot Girlfriend has the mouse, she ends up aiming at completely the wrong space ''in the sky'' and gets both of them killed[[note]]A few commenters have noticed that [[EntertaininglyWrong her aim is based on the very end of the first-person gun barrel on the bottom-right of the screen rather than the crosshairs in the center]][[/note]], [[FunnyBackgroundEvent but the text chat pops up with Edberg saying "still better than womble".]]
--->'''Cyanide''': Move the mouse so this is on top of the person, and then click the button to kill him, okay?\\
'''Cyanide's Hot Girlfriend''': ''(understanding)'' Ooooh... got it.
* At the very end, Womble's mouse stops working in the middle of the game, leaving him to be unable to aim or turn around until he gets killed. In spite of this, he ends up getting ''promoted'' to Distinguished Master Guardian, [[BigWhat which ends up baffling him and everyone else in the chat.]]
* Nep and her [[TheTease "stretching" noises.]]
-->'''Nep''': [[InnocentFanserviceGirl I'm getting lots of friend invites right now. Is it because of your stream?]]
* During the group's time in the lobby, Soviet tests out automatic voice gain control by having the others speak, leading to an OverlyLongGag, starting with Cyanide making weird noises while Gambit and Edberg throw insults Soviet's way before devolving into repeating the word [[RunningGag "faggot"]] towards Soviet, leading him to mute his channel, before unmuting to hear them still going, to Kaffe's confusion, muting again then unmuting to hear them ''still'' going, [[RuleOfThree then muting once more and unmuting]] to hear Edberg making what was [[FunWithSubtitles captioned as "weird sex noises"]] to Soviet's amusement and confusion as he mutes one more time before unmuting to a barrage of memes as Soviet [[SarcasmMode thanks them for the test]].
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 5]]
* As the game is setting up, Cyanide announces he's "going to do something people do every day." Cut to sounds of him ''[[ToiletHumor pissing on stream in front of 1000+ people.]]''
-->'''Soviet''': NO WAY. ''[[PunctuatedForEmphasis NO. FUCKING. WAY.]]'' YOU ARE A FUCKING ANIMAL. YOU'RE AN ABSOLUTE DISGRACE!
* Cyanide's abrupt decision to rebrand himself as the NiceGuy as a response to a Reddit thread. It lasts for all of seven seconds before Nep announces [[InnocentInnuendo "I'm peeking Banana."]]
** Speaking of innuendo...
-->'''Nep:''' Why do I suck so much today? ''(cue several seconds of uncharacteristic silence)''\\
'''Soviet:''' No one? No one's gonna jump on that?
* Soviet comes up with a rather bizarre theory:
--> '''Soviet''': I find that I often do better at ''VideoGame/CounterStrike'' [[ToiletHumor whenever I really, really need to poo.]] I think there's a correlation there.\\
'''Gambit''': So you're saying you need [[AssShove something up your bumhole?]]\\
'''Edberg''': Well that doesn't really matter, you're always full of shit!
* Soviet complains he doesn't want to go to work, to which Cyanide responds that as a streamer, playing games and recording is his "work."
-->'''Cyanide:''' You are working right now. That pisses me the fuck off.
** Later:
-->'''Soviet:''' Can you stop being so difficult to work with? I'm gonna complain to HR. I am a professional CS:GO player and you are not. As in, I do this for a living, okay?\\
''(Soviet gets killed at a later round)''\\
'''Cyanide:''' "Professional CS:GO player," he says.\\
'''Soviet:''' I never said I was any good!
* At the end of a round, Sheep picks up a Negev for Cyanide. [[TheGadfly Then he immediately throws it over a fence,]] sending Cyanide flying into a white-hot RageQuit.
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 6]]
* The very beginning of the video, which may as well be an EstablishingSeriesMoment (and is the first video found upon clicking onto [=SovietWomble's=] channel):
---> '''Teammate 1''': The key to winning a game of CS:GO is to keep good positivity and trust each other.\\
'''Entire Team''': Shut the fuck up.
** A similar moment happens soon after:
---> '''Soviet''': Most of us met in ''VideoGame/DayZ'' and we've formed an everlasting bond of friendship and love and respect...\\
'''Edberg''': Fuck you.\\
'''Soviet''': Yes...
* "That round only took 34 seconds. Name of [=SovietWomble's=] sex tape, volume 3."
* Cyanide: "Sovieeeet! Cake called me fat!"
-->'''Cake''': I did not!\\
'''Soviet''': You ''are'' fat.\\
'''Cyanide''': ''[[InelegantBlubbering (loud wailing)]]''\\
'''[=TeamSpeak=] Announcer''': User left your channel.\\
'''[=TheGuyNamedWaffle=]''': Not sure if he RageQuit or [[ExtremeOmnivore ate the microphone...]]
* During a clever bit of editing, Soviet friendly fires Nep, causing her to turn around with a [[EtTuBrute "Look of betrayal"]] and get killed by a shot to the back. All accompanied by a dramatic piano.
-->'''Soviet''': Sorry, Nep.\\
'''Nep''': Are you serious?!
* Soviet and Kas approach a doorway:
--> '''Soviet''': You first.\\
'''Kas''': Why me?\\
'''Soviet''': Women and children first.\\
'''Kas''': I have a... ''(sighs, then [[DisproportionateRetribution guns Soviet down]])''\\
'''Soviet''': A-hahahaha! BITCH!
* The clan has a game with two randoms who are speaking in voice chat. Then Cyanide and Nep proceed to spam the voice chat in Russian accents.
--> '''Nep''': Motherfucker, I will report you to my boyfriend, do you know who my boyfriend is? It's [[UsefulNotes/VladimirPutin Putin!]]
* Unlike Soviet's [[RunningGag usual problem with thrown grenades,]] one snippet features him throwing a smoke grenade that accidentally hits a small bar of a metal sign, sending it falling through the platforms. Thankfully for him, nobody else sees it.
* As the clan is organizing in Teamspeak, Cyanide is texting:
--> '''Cyanide''': How do you spell "luscious"?\\
'''Soviet''': L-U-S-C-C-I-O-U-S-T.\\
''(beat)''\\
'''Cyanide''': [[DelayedReaction ...what!? Fuck off!]]
* Cyanide is the last man standing:
--> '''Nep''': I swear to god if you don't get this, I will ''[[ThatCameOutWrong fuck]]''[[note]]she meant to say "beat"[[/note]] [[ThatCameOutWrong the shit out of you!]]\\
'''Cyanide''': Oh OKAY! I am not fucking... ''(completely disarms himself and charges the enemy)'' COME 'ERE! COME 'ERE! ''(dies)''
* "Honestly, the fucking Mars Curiosity Rover gets better ping than I do!"
* During one game where Soviet is on high ground and armed with a [[GatlingGood Negev]], Nep gets suddenly knifed by an enemy and prompts Soviet to turn around [[MoreDakka and start spraying out the window]]. [[TooDumbToLive Said enemy proceeds to jump up into his line of fire]] ''[[TooDumbToLive three times]]'' [[TooDumbToLive and dies]].
* Soviet picks up a [[LittleUselessGun R8 Revolver]] for one game, and after mentioning he's never gotten a kill with it, Cyanide challenges him to get one kill in the round in exchange for subscribing to him for a month. Soviet takes him up on his offer, but after seeing [[JokeWeapon how crap it is in combat]] and several back-and-forths on formation, [[ExactWords Soviet shoots and kills Cyanide on the basis that it counted as a kill]]. After a loud and frustrated squabble on the terms, Cyanide gives into his word and subscribes.
* While in the lobby, Soviet tells the chat the purpose of the stream, that they are raising money for disabled gamers, though he does make a jab at Cyanide by clarifying that he meant physically handicapped rather than mentally like Cyanide, [[ImStandingRightHere while Cyanide can hear him]].
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 7]]
* "Why do you have a Deagle, Moogle?"
--> '''Moogle''': Because it's Thursday.\\
''(beat)''\\
'''Soviet''': ''(laughs)'' What?
* "Cyanide, that's a good point, we now need to reveal that we're the owners of CSGOLOTTERY.CO.UK.ORG, don't we, yes?"
* The moment when Edberg sees a target's silhouette through smoke and he shoots, but then it turns out it's Moogle, getting him banned.
* The rather [[OverlyLongGag extended]] sequence of Cyanide relaying random fun facts to annoy the ZF clan.
---> '''Cyanide''': He's on Z! [[TooMuchInformation And a tapir has the largest penis-to-body ratio of any animal!]]
** Other players also get in on the action:
--->'''Moogle''': Did you know the whale's average penis size is about 8 metres?\\
'''Nep''': Would you be surprised if I said yes, I knew that?\\
'''Moogle''': No. ''(Womble laughs)''
** After several minutes, the entire chat gets fed up:
---> '''Soviet''': Unsubscribe! Unsubscribe!\\
'''Cyanide''': You have unsubscribed from Cyanide Fun Facts!\\
'''Soviet''': Thank you!\\
'''Cyanide''': [[HereWeGoAgain You have now subscribed to Cyanide Gorilla Facts! Did you know—]]\\
'''Soviet''': ''NOOOO, NOOOO, NOOOO--''
* At one point, Nep gets disconnected, so Womble had [[TheCutie Cake]] be "the eye-candy" for the meantime. He asks her to [[CallBack "moan seductively for the audience"]]... resulting in [[HellIsThatNoise what sounds like a soft ghost wail]].
-->'''Soviet''': ''(laughs)'' What was that? I said "moan seductively," not have a fucking seizure.
* "Someone in my chat is called 'Womble's Dignity' and he just timed out." [[IResembleThatRemark This is said moments before]] Soviet comes across a prone enemy, gets up close, but then [[EpicFail the enemy unknowingly moves out of the way, notices Soviet and kills him.]]
* Cyanide, Gambit, Edberg and the rest of the clan decide to do another "sound test" like Womble asked them to do at an earlier Bullshittery episode. As they make random noises and run off into the distance, Soviet can only remark:
-->'''Soviet:''' Beset, on all sides, by idiots.
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 8]]
* Near the beginning, Cyanide begins with [[CallBack "Did you know?"]] [[WeAreNotGoingThroughThatAgain before everybody frantically tells him to stop.]]
* Cyanide, mocking Edberg reaching Global Elite (for the second time): "I'm ''globul''."
--->"What? He's global, he doesn't need to hear."
* The revelation that [[TheUnintelligible Nevil]] ''types'' in broken English.
---> "i still not BOTTOM FARGH"
** In a very CrossesTheLineTwice bit of humor, the clan remembers that Nevil is divorced.
---> '''Soviet''': They had communication trouble.\\
''(beat, before abruptly cutting to the next scene)''
*** During this particular moment, [[FunnyBackgroundEvent Nevil's message in the bottom-left chat reads "get a a KILL SOVIET"]].
** Later, Nevil attempts to save[[labelnote:*]]Try to survive until the next round to keep a favored weapon[[/labelnote]], [[PlayerTic casually unloading his bullets]] when the enemy wins as he waits for the next round. The instant he runs out and before the round begins, he gets gibbed by an enemy out of nowhere, causing the entire chat to burst into laughter.
* Moogle invites Soviet to see something mind-blowing during the warm-up: [[MundaneObjectAmazement the second-floor interior of a building that most people miss.]] Moogle expresses disappointment for Soviet not appreciating it as much, leading to a brief argument of how anyone could see it just from entering the room, then later as they're at spawn:
--> '''Soviet''': Can I blow your mind? [[DeadpanSnarker Look, there's an APC right over there.]]\\
'''Moogle''': [[MundaneObjectAmazement Noooo way!]]\\
'''Soviet''': The things you notice when you have ''eyes.''
* "dis game is like your mother. its a shit."
* The clan invites a new player to join in a game. It's '''UsefulNotes/{{Jesus}}'''.
--> '''Jesus''': Just bear in mind, it will take me three days to respawn.
* The entire bit about Soviet being subbed on Twitch by "Womble's Left Nipple", [[ItMakesSenseInContext leading to a brief panic when he realizes his nipples are asymmetrical.]]
* After Soviet is the last person alive and plants the bomb, he waits to find the last two enemies. When they show up, they simultaneously open fire on Soviet, then ''[[ATeamFiring proceed to miss nearly every shot]]'' as Soviet takes them both down. This is framed with a dramatic closeup, slow motion, and is inexplicably underscored with [[Franchise/PowerRangers "Go Go Power Rangers"]].
** He then proceeds to do very well in the following matches, while [[TheAce Edberg]] does poorly.
--> '''Cyanide:''' WHY ARE THEY SO SHIT? WHEN IT'S YOU?! WHY CAN'T THEY DO THAT? [[ItsAllAboutMe WHEN IT'S ME?!]]
--> '''Moog:''' [[LampshadeHanging Why do we never get shit like that?]] It's like you can see an invisible hand turn down the difficulty just for Soviet.
** Case in point, during a round Soviet tries to defuse the bomb... only for an enemy to walk up and ''cover him'' defusing the very bomb he's supposed to protect.
* [[BigEater Cyanide]] eats during the game, and in his words, "When I'm feeling sensual, I become [[TheImmodestOrgasm vocal."]] At one point, Soviet pulls out his dedicated "mute Cyanide" button on his keyboard.
* During a couple of rounds, Soviet's teammates ask him to buy them certain weapons. In response, Soviet does buy the weapons, but then tosses them off the play area. The second time, after tossing Nep's requested [=USPS=], Edberg asks Soviet to throw his AK in the air under the guise of juggling it, giving Nep the opportunity to pick it up after Soviet falls for it.
[[/folder]]
[[folder: Part 9]]
* When a match is down to the last teammate, Nep says "You can do it, I believe in you." ''Before she's even done talking'', the teammate is gunned down by an enemy.
--> '''Nep:''' Nevermind.
* Soviet keeps trying to prefire. He ''repeatedly'' hits the wall instead.
* Nep wonders if Soviet's trying to shoot a shape around her.
--> '''Soviet:''' No, if I had to shoot a shape around you, it'd be wider.
--> '''Nep:''' ''realizes what he just said; promptly guns Soviet down''
* Soviet asks how someone's been.
--> ''Aaaaaaaagggggggghhhhhhhh!''
--> '''Soviet:''' A good Monday, then?
* Soviet discovers that the crosshair he's been using for ''years'' was actually horrible, given as a joke by Cyanide.
* Digby is excited to have gotten two kills, declaring that he's no longer terrible ... only to discover the one player he was better than was a bot.
* At the end of a match, Soviet, no longer having need for the grenade he was cooking, just tosses it away. It hits Cyanide, killing him.
--> '''Soviet:''' Well, it did some good in the end.
--> '''Cyanide:''' FUUUUUUU-
[[/folder]]
