History Funny / OrangeIsTheNewBlack

* From "Imaginary Enemies" : Luschek hands Piper some electrical work. She says she doesn't know the first thing about electrical work. He replies "Repeat after me. [[DeadpanSnarker Don't electrocute yourself]]. Now you know the first thing."

-->'''Taystee''': So I'm sitting there topless on a bulldozer in a construction site, barbecue sauce on my titties, and I'm like, "[[NoodleIncident what the fuck, again]]?"

* From "Imaginary Enemies" : Lubschek hands piper some electrical work. She says she doesn't know the first thing about electrical work. He replies "Repeat after me. [[DeadpanSnarker Don't electrocute yourself]]. Now you know the first thing."

-->'''Gloria:''' ''[to Gina and Norma]'' You fuck with this kitchen, I'll have you out of here so fast, you'd think your ass grew wheels.

* When Pornstache's actions and speech patterns aren't overtly threatening, misogynist or down right disturbing, much of what he says and does is so random, exaggerated and obnoxious to the point of being hilarious. It is only made more humorous by the fact that so much of his on-screen antics are ad-libbed and improvised by the actor portraying him.

* When Pornstache's speech patterns aren't overtly threatening, misogynist or down right disturbing, he actually has many rants and one liners that are considerably both random and hilarious (often obviously ad-libbed by the actor portraying him.)

* When Pornstache's speak patterns aren't overtly threatening, misogynist or down right disturbing, he actually has many rants and one liners that are considerably both random and hilarious.

* Pornstache's rants and one-liners jump back and forth between either being completely random and hilarious or extremely threatening and disturbing.

-->'''Gloria:''' ''[to Gina and Norma]'' You fuck with this kitchen, I'll have you out of here so fast, you think your ass grew wheels.

-->'''Red:''' ''[to Gina and Norma]'' You to fuck with that kitchen!

* Most dealings with Pennastucky, but the encounters leading her to believe she's a bona fide faith healer were pretty funny. [[spoiler:Until it ends up landing her in the Psych Ward, anyways.]]

** In a later episode: "Look we, all in here cause we got lost on the way to church!"

* "Kill, Lil Boo, kill!" (Lil Boo licks Big Boo's face) "We're working on it."

-->'''Taystee''': So I'm sitting there, barbecue sauce on my titties, and I'm like, "[[NoodleIncident what the fuck, again]]?"

-->'''Taystee''': So I'm sitting there, barbecue sauce on my titties, and I'm like, "[[{{NoodleIncident}} what the fuck, again]]?"

* Taystee and Pousse's extended riff on Stuff White People Like in ''WAC Pack''.

--->'''Alida Diaz''': And don't embezzle, or illegally download media

* Poussey trying to intimidate the paraplegic girl who's there for the Scared Straight program, only to immediately backtrack when she's worried she's offended her by implying she can't handle herself.

-->'''Taystee''': So I'm sitting there, barbecue sauce on my titties, and I'm like, "[[{{NoodleIncident}} what the fuck, again]]?"

-->'''Taystee''': Wait, shortee, you want a book to read or a step-stool? Because I tell you right now, you ain't stepping on the Goblet of Fire. Don't be fucking with Harry Potter. Now you can step up on Ulysses -- everyone says it's so genius, but I call their bullshit. No one wants to go through all that rambling. Ain't nobody got time for that.

* Seeing Suzanne "Crazy Eyes" Warren being visited by her parents: "Mom, for the last time, I like my hair this way!"

* Taystee and Pousse's extended riff on Stuff White People Like in ''WAC Pack''.

* Pretty much the entire scene with Chapman and Dina in "Bora Bora Bora."

-->'''Taystee:''' "Wake me up so I can watch."

* Amid the various protestations of innocence: "Hey, I may be a thief but I'm not an embezzler, alright?" And then, as an afterthought: "And that guy shot himself."

* The reason the second episode is called "Tit Punch." "[[spoiler: You popped her tit!]]"