History Funny / Grimm

* In "Lonelyhearts", Nick asks Monroe to stake out at a bar to spy on a Ziegevolk who’s been uses their pheromones after eating a specific kind of frog to seduce and kidnap women. Monroe manages to find the Ziegevolk sweet talking his latest target and tries to keep an eye on them… only to bail out of the bar a few minutes later because even ''he'' was starting to swoon.

--->'''Wu:''' "Hey, so let me get this straight. In the last ''(glances at his watch)'' six hours, you're arrested six villains, saved a damsel in distress and reunited a family, while I filled out three dozen overtime reports and scrubbed out the coffeemaker. [[DeadpanSnarker Yeah, we've all put in a rich, full day.]]"

*** Monroe’s reaction when Rosalee shows him what’s left of the cat’s carrier.
---->'''Monroe:''' Okay… that warrants a “How the Hell did it do this?”

-->'''[[spoiler:Wendigo]]''' (being beaten up by Nick at the end of the episode): You're a Grimm?!\\
'''Nick''': [[DeadpanSnarker Took you long enough.]]

* Also during "Quill", the whole scene with Adalind's cat: from the part where we see it on the ceiling, to where it's let outside, followed shortly by [[ThatPoorCat the sound of a crashing vehicle and a screech]]. Rosalee and Monroe decide not to check what happened.
** Monroe’s reaction when Rosalee shows him what’s left of the cat’s carrier.
--->'''Monroe:''' Okay… that warrants a “How the Hell did it do this?”

'''Monroe:''' No way! Dude, I can’t be around that guy, he’s way too potent. I almost bought him a drink!

(Kelly looks on, slightly amused)\\

(Hank is surprised)\\

** After DeEtta passes out on the floor Monroe and his mom share a synchronized facepalm.

* In ''The Wild Hunt'', Monroe and Rosalee talk about [[DoesThisRemindYouOfAnything their first times]].... performing a woge. Rosalee first says it was with her brother, which is deemed embarrassing, and Monroe's is said to be with his mother, which is deemed better by comparison. Until the actual context of the situation is explained, it sounds [[IncestIsRelative so incredibly wrong]] and CrossesTheLineTwice.

'''Monroe:''' You know, you never ask me about anything else. Like sports or music or who the hottest Bond babe was. You know, like normal conversation. Just saying. Be nice to switch it up once and a while, you know.\\

-->'''Bud:''' ... And your wife is lovely, by the way!\\
'''Nick:''' She's not my wife.\\

* Monroe's subplot in "[[HalloweenEpisode La Llarona]]". You can see the ending from a mile away, but it is no less satisfying.

* In a cast interview about their favourite episodes, Bitsie Tulloch (sitting beside David Giuntoli, who plays Nick) gleefully chirped that "Game Ogre" and "The Thing With Feathers" were her favourite episodes, then realized (as Giuntoli gave her an {{aside glance}}) that that meant that she liked the one where she rejected Nick, and the one with Nick getting sent to the hospital after being beaten to within an inch of his life. Whoops!

'''Wu:''' Well, you are. {{Beat}} Well, he ''is''.\\
'''Renard:''' ''(EPIC DeathGlare)'' I'm sorry. What precinct do you work at, again, sergeant?\\

-->'''Nick:''' [[BoredWithInsanity Oh.]] ''({{Beat}})'' [[BlatantLies I don't know.]]

** Also true for Portuguese. A prime example of this is in the episode [[spoiler:''Death Do Us Part'', where the Wesen of the week is a Matança Zumbido, who kills his victims with massive shocks of electricity. Its name in English? "''Buzz kill''".]]

*** And again for the lone wesen-of-the-week with an Arabic name, the Musasat alShabab; while technically grammatically correct Arabic, it sounds really, really silly to an Arabic speaker. While shabab (شباب) can indeed be used for the abstract noun “youth” (as in fountain of youth, ينبوع الشباب), it’s more commonly the plural of shabb (شاب), “young person.” Musasa (مصاصة, musasat is the construct form) on the other hand, is laughably wrong; a musasa or more commonly, masasa, is a straw or lollipop (literally, “thing sucked on - ie sucker). So the name sounds like it means...”straw of the young people.” The word they wanted is massaas (مصاص), the agent noun, as in the translation for “vampire” (مصاص الدم/مصاص الدماء, literally, bloodsucker). Even then, masaas al-shabaab would still sound kind of...[[GettingCrapPastTheRadar]], since in this troper’s experience, even the term for vampire using the same first word sounds rather sexual...

*** And again for the lone wesen-of-the-week with an Arabic name, the Musasat alShabab; while technically grammatically correct Arabic, it sounds really, really silly to an Arabic speaker. While shabab (شباب) can indeed be used for the abstract noun “youth” (as in fountain of youth, ينبوع الشباب), it’s more commonly the plural of shabb (شاب), “young person.” Musasa (مصاصة, musasat is the construct form) on the other hand, is laughably wrong; a musasa is a straw or lollipop (literally, “thing sucked on - ie sucker). So the name sounds like it means...”straw of the young people.” The word they wanted is massaas (مصاص), the agent noun, as in the translation for “vampire” (مصاص الدم/مصاص الدماء, literally, bloodsucker). Even then, masaas al-shabaab would still sound kind of...[[GettingCrapPastTheRadar]], since in this troper’s experience, even the term for vampire using the same first word sounds rather sexual...

-->'''Det. Griffin''': How does a kid do something like that?
-->'''Nick''': [[ComicallyMissingThePoint Well, he was an outsider and he was pushed too far...]]
-->'''Det. Griffin''': Yeah, I know that, but how did he get all those rats to attack those kids?
-->'''Nick''': [[BoredWithInsanity Oh.]] ''({{Beat}})'' [[BlatantLies I don't know.]]

--> '''Monroe''': (Talking about the creature of the week) Fortunately, they're very rare, but if you ever run across one...
--> '''Nick''': (Who's in a hospital bed after being smacked senseless by the Ogre) *DeathGlare*
--> '''Monroe''': (Awkwardly) [[AskAStupidQuestion Well... I guess you... have.]]

--> '''Monroe:''' What's my favorite color?
--> '''Nick:''' What?
--> '''Monroe:''' You know, you never ask me about anything else. Like sports or music or who the hottest Bond babe was. You know, like normal conversation. Just saying. Be nice to switch it up once and a while, you know.
--> '''Nick:''' Well, what's your favorite color?
--> '''Monroe:''' You don't mean that.
--> '''Nick:''' No, really, I want to know.
--> '''Monroe:''' Red
--> '''Nick:''' Well, I feel so much closer to you now.

-->'''Juliette''': You told him about the cabin.\\
'''Monroe''': No, I told him about the boots, because, uhh...\\
'''Nick''': The boots led us to the cabin. Which means, in other words: without the boots, there would be no cabin.

-->'''Monroe''': Alles hat ein Ende, nur die Wurst hat zwei.
-->'''Nick''': That sounded really beautiful. What does it mean?
-->'''Monroe''': 'Everything has an end, only the sausage has two.'

--> '''Hank''': You have got to be kidding me?!

--> '''Renard:''' (''after accepting an award'') "To be honest, I really don't like these things. Always feels like I'm getting the credit for other people's work."
--> '''Wu:''' "Well, you are" {{Beat}} "Well, he ''is''."
--> '''Renard:''' ''(EPIC DeathGlare)'' "I'm sorry. What precinct do you work at, again, sergeant?"
--> '''Wu:''' ''(takes the hint)'' "I'll go buy you another drink, Sir."

--> '''[[spoiler:Wendigo]]''' (being beaten up by Nick at the end of the episode): You're a Grimm?!
--> '''Nick''': [[DeadpanSnarker Took you long enough.]]

--> '''Monroe''': ''Why?!''

--> '''Nick''': (Having done it and feeling fine) Was that it?
-->'''Renard''': No.
--> (Nick doubles over)
--> '''Renard''': That's it.

--> '''Renard''': I need something for obsessive behavior.
--> '''Monroe''': Okay, now just to be clear: do you have obsessive behavior or you WANT obsessive behavior? 'Cause we can deal with both...
--> '''Renard''': No, it needs to go away.
--> '''Monroe''': All right. I have to ask you a couple of questions to find out exactly what we're dealing with here. Are these feelings for a person or [[BestialityIsDepraved an animal]]?
--> '''Renard''': (DeathGlare)
--> '''Monroe''': Sorry. [[CrazyPrepared I have to be thorough.]]
--> '''Renard''': A PERSON.

---> '''Bud''': Oh, hey...how are you doing?

---> '''Bud''': My wife gave me that handkerchief for my birthday. On Christmas. My birthday's on Christmas, just like Jesus.

--> '''Monroe''': Don't you need a warrant for that?
--> '''Nick''': You're right. (beat) [[LoopholeAbuse You open it.]]
--> '''Monroe''': Oh... okay...

--> '''Bud:''' She's seeing...''you know!'' And he's been very clear about...YOU KNOW! And we just can't...''YOU KNOW!''

--> '''Monroe:''' I take some getting used to.

--> '''Wu:''' I think we've got most of them... ''(body SPLATS in front of him)'' ...handled.

--> '''Renard:''' You okay?
--> '''Hank:''' I wish I could do that!

--> '''[[spoiler:Mrs. Garcia]]''': Ay chihuahua, you're a Grimm!
** Nick's face when he discovers who it is, seriously, pause it on his face after [[spoiler: she]] shifts back to normal. Renard's face looking at the culprit through the two-way mirror at the police station is just as priceless.
--> '''Renard:''' Are you ''kidding me?''
** Same episode, the way that the whole Grimm gang (minus Renard) are sitting in Monroe's house having a meal and talking about the different mauling techniques of wesen as if its the most mundane thing ever, while looking at the crime scene photos.

--> '''Juliette:''' Something wrong?\\

-->'''Nick:''' I guess she doesn't know who you are either because you killed her mother.\\

-->'''Nick:''' Did you kill the driver?\\

-->'''Renard:''' Where's the woman who's supposed to be protecting you?\\

* Monroe meeting Renard's [[spoiler: mother]]. Rosalee is just fine with it and gets right to business, But Monroe is so nervous the entire time.
* When Bud finds out [[spoiler: Nick isn't a Grimm anymore]] he freaks out. Monroe and Rosalee urge him to keep it a secret, leading to this gem:
--> '''Bud:''' I gotta go home and not tell anybody!

--> '''Nick:''' That's the last time I ever yell at a kid.

--> '''Juliette:''' I mean, that's kind of a big deal, don't you think. I feel like somebody ought to be proclaiming this from a mountaintop.
-->'''Trubel:''' [[CassandraTruth Well, I used to try proclaiming a lot of things]].

--> '''Monroe:''' ...Because I gotta stop thinking about Nick and Juliette and Adalind or ''[[GirlOnGirlIsHot Adalind with Juliette]]'' because the whole thing is like some bizarre, convoluted ménage à trois.\\

--> '''Viktor:''' Don't worry. It's all organic.

* Monroe is uncomfortable leaving Rosalee in the store alone after [[spoiler: an effigy is lit up on their lawn by Wesen purists]]. Cue Juliette walking in, casually remarking that she just had to reload her gun, and followed shortly by Trubel. The three resident {{action girl}}s give Monroe, Nick, and Hank a look, and Rosalee tells them that they've got things covered. Also doubles as a moment of awesome.

-->'''Renard:''' ''*Grabs Juliette's arm and hustles her away*'' [[CasualDangerDialog Time for lunch.]]
-->'''Juliette:''' Did I do that? I didn't do that... Did I?
-->'''Renard:''' ''*Utterly deadpan*'' I believe you did.

--> '''Linus:''' What are you looking for?
--> '''Monroe:''' ''Nothing!'' I'm just...I'm scared, you know, you're gonna...shoot me! (starts waving)
--> '''Linus:''' What are you do...? Get away from the window!
--> '''Monroe:''' [[BlatantLies No, I got a cramp!]]

--> '''Adalind:''' [[ReallyGetsAround I have to sleep with someone else.]] Fast!

--> '''Monroe:''' But I'm a vegan!

* Adalind's explanation to her mom's coffin of what's been going on since she died. It ends up being a bit of a TearJerker, but it starts out pretty funny

--> "[[TheLoinsSleepTonight This has never happened to me before.]]"

--->'''Lawyer:''' So you expect me to be your alibi for a murder you didn't commit because you were actually murdering the person who was your alibi?
--->'''Perp:''' (still deadpan): [[ItMakesSenseInContext Basically yeah]].

-->'''Monroe''': You have to be more...Renardy...
-->'''Rosalee''': You have to be more full of yourself.
-->'''Juliette''': A lot more.
-->'''Monroe''': Like you were just elected Mayor of Portland.
-->'''Rosalee''': And you think you deserve it.
-->'''Juliette''': And you want Nick Burkhardt dead. ''(Nick's face, which he's been trying to make smug, falls)''
-->'''Monroe''': That's it.
-->'''Juliette''': Perfect.
-->'''Rosalee''': There you go.

-->'''Captor''': I'm the man your daddy stabbed in the back.
-->'''Diana''': No. That was Mister Bonaparte.

-->'''Monroe''':'Everything has an end, only the sausage has two.'

-->'''Monroe''':Everything has an end, only the sausage has two.

-->'''Nick''': [[BoredWithInsanity Oh.]] <{{Beat}}> [[BlatantLies I don't know.]]

* Team Grimm come home from an exhausting day to find Josh, son of an older Grimm who died near the end of the previous season, hiding in a corner from the Wesen Council and shivering while holding a machete. When Nick cautiously asks if he even knows how to use a machete, Josh replies he has no idea.

** Unfortunately there haven't been any new ones since May 2013, as the artists have moved on to drawing TeenWolf characters.