History Funny / FrenchBaguetteIntelligence

-->'''Gringo:''' Funny you should say that, Bowl. But then how is the United Kingdom part of Europe?\\

-->'''Fuck Cares:''' Quick challenge. Name every continent.\\

-->'''Snugglet:''' I've been a little busy.\\

-->'''Bowl:''' The rivalry between France and England... We're like brothers if you think about it.\\
'''Fuck Cares:''' Well, it's "La France" not "Le France". So, France is Female.\\
'''Bowl:''' And it's "mother England" not "father England"...\\
'''Fuck Cares:''' Oh em jee, we're sisters!\\
'''female!Bowl:''' YAAAAS QUEEEN!\\
'''female!Fuck Cares:''' YOU GO, GIRL!

--> '''Gringo:''' Funny you should say that, Bowl. But then how is the United Kingdom part of Europe?\\
'''Fuck Cares:''' HAHAHAHAHA, SUCK IT BREXIT!

--> '''Fuck Cares:''' Quick challenge. Name every continent.\\
'''Harry:''' Europe. Asia. Africa. Oceania. North America. South America. Antarctica.

--> '''Fuck Cares:''' Called it! It's all the United States' fault! It had its stench all over it!\\
'''Gringo:''' Isn't it like 3 a.m for you?\\
'''Fuck Cares:''' Nearly 5 a.m.\\
'''Gringo:''' Bro, go to sleep.\\
'''Fuck Cares:''' I don't need sleep. I need to restore the geographical order.

--> '''Logical Loop:''' HOW DARE YOU MOCK ZODIAC SIGNS?! !ban\\
'''Fuck Cares and Bowl:''' Here we go agai--

--> '''Snugglet:''' I'm baaaack!\\
'''Bowl:''' Who the fuck are you?\\
'''Starla:''' Omg, welcome back. Where have you been?!\\
'''Snugglet:''' I've been a little busy.\\
'''Bowl:''' Get busy again. Bowl doesn't like you.\\
'''Fuck Cares:''' [[StraightMan You met her one second ago]].\\
'''Bowl:''' Bowl doesn't like her.

-->'''Fuck Cares:''' ...did you just say "Latinx"?\\
'''Snugglet:''' Uh-oh! Homophobe alert!\\
'''Bowl:''' Bowl really, really doesn't like you. I reject you ''personally''. I'm ''You''-phobic.

-->'''Starla:''' [=OMG=], I literally don't give a shit if you can speak Spanish, FC. You're not impressing anyone and I'm not gonna translate it.\\
'''Bowl:''' Well, I translated it and he said that you're fat.\\
'''Fuck Cares:''' No, I didn't. I said that Latinos born in the [=USA=] can barely speak Spanish in the first place, so they have no authority on this debate.\\
'''Bowl:''' I just translated that and it's French for "Like, really really fat. And ugly."

--> For today's dinner, I made sirloin steak with triple-cooked, Parmesan-coated chips, spinach and Béarnaise sauce.

-->'''Bowl:''' Say, what the fuck is "pomme de terre", eh? Tell me, how special must one be to find a POTATO and go: ''BEHOLD! THE MIGHTY "EARTH APPLE!"'' THAT, lad, is caveman logic.\\
'''Fuck Cares:''' You look like a fucking potato but you still call it a face; so what's wrong with that?

-->'''Bowl:''' The average IQ in the UK is ONE MIGHTY point above France's.\\
UK is Big Brain, FC. BIG BRAIN.

-->'''Bowl:''' Bowl is a man of many ambitions, okay?!\\
'''Caffeina:''' Is that French for "sl*t"?\\
'''Bowl:''' No. [[EuropeansAreKinky The French word for that is "French".]] Ask FC.\\
'''Faux Cares:''' That's so nice of you that when you get destroyed you make sure I sink down with you...\\
'''Bowl:''' Aye, any time.

-->Here at B.B.B. (Bowl's Bigotries and Bollocks) we take the identities of our customers very seriously to ensure that we can discriminate against them accurately, for an optimized experience.\\
Bowl fucking loves twitter bios, man. They are a treat to us folk who want to define people by their labels. My favorite one is 'Latinx' because it's versatility breaks new boundaries.\\
With 'Latinx' being the only word so far that refers to people for both their race and gender, I can finally be racist and transphobic at the same time. I'd personally like to thank the word 'Latinx' for inventing 'translatinophobia'; [[Film/RevengeOfTheSith this bigotry will make a fine addition to my collection!]]

-->'''Faux Cares:''' Or maybe he lost them gambling; like that one lad I know who lost his testicle in Monaco.\\
'''Bowl:''' Dude! I told you that in confidence!

-->'''Vegan:''' You wouldn't eat a human, would you?\\
'''Harry:''' I would. Without hesitation.\\
However, it must meet certain standards. It must be seasoned a day in advance, properly seared, and served between blue and medium rare.\\
It is also important to make sure that the human is vegan. I believe vegan humans have more tender meat.\\
'''Vegan:''' I... don't know how to respond to that.\\
'''Harry:''' Have dinner with me. We shall eat human legs with potato dauphinoise, courgettes and gin sauce.\\
'''Vegan:''' I'll pass, thank you.

-->'''Goblin Tyrant:''' What the hell is this? Looks like the future is testosterone deficiency. Was masculinity not user-friendly enough or something?\\
Let's be real here. Absolutely no one would want to cuddle with an avatar that [[FloweryInsults looks like a castrated Pinocchio made out of marshmallows soaked in soy.]]\\
It also annoys me how he looks like [[VagueAge he could be anywhere between twelve years old and thirty-seven.]]

-->'''Bowl:''' The Bowl doesn't get bullied.\\
The Bowl IS the bully.\\
'''Goblin Tyrant:''' All I remember is Faux Cares beating you to a pulp in Minecraft.

-->'''Bowl:''' Unfortunately fellas, we're no better.\\
I'm always drunk, and entertaining unrealistic fantasies. That's a form of escapism.\\
You guys are always playing {{videogames}}. Another form of escapism.\\
Harry is always cooking, [[BreadEggsMilkSquick because otherwise he'd vivisect a pedestrian.]]

* Harry is incredibly outraged when Absent brings up the notion that Darth Vader could defeat Mr Incredible with ease. Leading him to say this incredibly enlightening sentence:
-->'''Harry:''': Preposterous! Mr. Incredible's power is beyond your understanding.
-->Mister Incredible is an incredible Mister.

* Cleophoebs' marriage advice:
--> '''Cleophoebs''': A real man would always be happy to be his wife's human-shield.\\
'''Faux Cares''': I pity your boyfriend, if that's what you expect from him...

-->'''Faux Cares''': I'm not a parent.
-->'''Cleophoebs''': Gimme 10 minutes.
-->'''Bowl''': [[GetARoom Should I leave you both alone or should I begin taking my trousers off?]] Because I'm getting uncomfortable...

--> [[WhyDontYouMarryIt IF YOU LIKE [REDACTED] SO MUCH]] WHY DON'T YOU SHOVE A TACO UP YOUR ASS?

--> I DETECT BULLSHIT OF THE HIGHEST OFFENCE!

*

*

[[folder:Do Irish-American exist?]]

With 'Latinx' being the only word so far that refers to people for both their race and gender, I can finally be racist and transphobic at the same time. I'd personally like to thank the word 'Latinx' for inventing 'translatinophobia'; this bigotry will make a fine addition to my collection!

* There is, of cource, Harry's insistance that he is delicious.

-->'''Harry:''': Preposterous! Mr Incredible's power is beyond your understanding.

'''Faux Cares''': I pity yoour boyfriend, if that's what you expect from him...

* Celophoebs' marriage advice:
--> '''Celophoebs''': A real man would always be happy to be his wife's human-shield.\\

[[TeamChef Harry is always cooking,]] [[BreadEggsMilkSquick because otherwise he'd vivisect a pedestrian.]]

* Bowl deciding he doesn't like Snugget immediately upon the video starting.
--> '''Snugget:''' I'm baaaack!\\

'''Snugget:''' I've been a little busy.\\

-->Here ar B.B.B. (Bowl's Bigotries and Bollocks) we take the identities of our customers very seriously to ensure that we can discriminate against them accurately, for an optimized experience.\\

-->'''Bowl''': Should I leave you both alone or should I begin taking my trousers off? Because I'm getting uncomfortable...

-->'''Fuck Cares''': I'm not a parent.

* Cleophoebs spits out utter gold after FC attempts to dissuade her from punching him:

* Harry is incredibly outraged when Absent brings up the notion that Darth Vader could defeat Mr Incredible with ease. Leading him to say this incredibly enlightening sentence.

* Cleophoebs spits out utter gold after FC attempts to dissuade her from punching him.