History Film / DoctorInClover

->'''Robert''': And we really ought to get rid of our ''ghastly'' moustache. They're right out now, you know.
->'''Dr. Grimsdyke''': Oh, no, no. No. It makes me look younger.
->'''Robert''': By the time I've finished with you, you'll look so young, you won't even be able to ''grow'' a moustache.

-->'''Wendover''': Just a minute. I 'ope your 'ands are clean.
-->'''Sir Lancelot''': Don't be impertinent! Learn to control your tongue or I'll have you discharged from this hospital forthwith!
-->'''Wendover''': Is that a threat? Are you threatenin' me? That's nice, innit? I'm on me deathbed an' I'm bein' ''threatened''. I bet you wouldn't talk to me like that if I was royalty, if I 'ad a crown 'round me 'ead.
-->'''Sir Lancelot''': You are ''not'' royalty.
-->'''Wendover''': No, I know I'm not. I'm just a bit of cannon fodder what fought for King and country an' is now become a guinea pig for the medical profession. All right then, if that's what you want, you want everybody to see my stomach? 'Ere, Nurse, come an' 'ave a look at this. An' the rest of ya can come an' play naughts an' crosses all over it. Come on!

-->'''Matron''': Now, get this clear, everyone, nurses and patients. You are not here to enjoy yourselves; you are here to get better. And ''better'' you are going to get!

-->'''Wendover''': Well, I was bending down in the trenches like a private leading my men over the top, when suddenly - ''bang'' - awf goes there's a grenade, an' a lump of shrapnel hits me right up the-
-->'''Sir Lancelot''': Rectum?
-->'''Wendover''': Well, it didn't do 'em any good.

-->'''Miles''': It's my idiot cousin, Gaston Grimsdyke! You don't think he's coming to work here, do you?

-->'''Sir Lancelot''': If I catch you jaywalking again, I'll flatten you into the tarmac!

-->'''Dr. Grimsdyke''': Excuse me, won't you, miss?
-->'''Long-Haired Patient''': Watch it, mate.
-->'''Dr. Grimsdyke''': I beg your pardon, ah, er... sir.

-->'''Sydney''': Now, now, don't excite yourself, Tatty.
-->'''Miss Rubikov''': An' don't call me "Tatty"! Me name's Tatiana!

-->'''Sir Lancelot''': I feel as if my head's been ''trepanned'' with a ''boathook''.
-->'''Dr. Grimsdyke''': You're lucky. I haven't even got a head.

--->'''Miles''': Well, Nurse Holiday, what can I do for you?
--->'''Nurse Holiday''': Kiss me, you kinky thing.
--->'''Miles''': Very well. If you think it will, ah, ''help'' your complaint.

-->'''Nurse Bancroft's Fiancé''': I'll see you in Casualty tomorrow, Doctor.
-->'''Dr. Grimsdyke''': I won't be in Casualty tomorrow.
-->'''Nurse Bancroft's Fiancé''': You ''will'' be... if you ask her out again.

-->'''Sir Lancelot''': The kilt has certain ''considerable'' advantages. Especially if a chap's got ''sexy'' knees.

* MakeoverFail: Dr. Burke gets a new look so he can look younger in an attempt to get with Jeannine. The only issue with this is after his makeover he looks ''too'' young, and loses the chance to take Professor Halfbeck's job in Canada.