1000 Bad Reasons To Declare War

764: You killed my father/mother/[list of relatives].

I'm serious, a personal vendetta is not a reason to make a country suffer. Someone should explain this to the SOIAF characters.

765: I once had a bad burrito from a shady-looking Mexican restaurant in their largest city and I had diarrhea for two days.

766: My country is a frozen wasteland and their beaches are the bomb. Lock n' load guys, we are going on a tour.

767: I used to live there and it wasn't a utopia!

768: A random moron from that country decided to shine my shoes for no damn reason!

769. We decided to go over there and take their jobs instead.

770. Because the list is so long, we may have repeated reasons. Invade the country of one of those people and unperson their posts.

771.We have to go to war, it is the will of the Snow Demons.

772. Because I want my own TV sitcom entitled Third Reich from the Sun, about a race of Space Nazis who come to Earth and conquer it... and I'm not a Space Nazi.

edited 16th Oct '14 4:54:24 PM by TheOneWhoTropes

773: Social Darwinism?

774: They beat us in Mortal Kombat nine times, and we need to protect our realm.

That's actually a good reason. I vote to disregard that one.

775. to Kill Zeus, no matter what cost, even if the seas rise, hordes of insects blot the land, the plants wither and die, the skies turn to eternal storms and mankind suffers for a petty personal vengeance.

776: They have a lot of oil, and we want it. Olive oil. For delicious salads.

777. I lost the contents of the treasury at one of their casinos.

778: I bumped into them on the street.

779: That skull over their throne is bleeding creepy!

779. They called our skull motif "Too creepy".

780: They accidentally misspelled our leader's first name on a completely unofficial document.

edited 21st Oct '14 6:41:54 PM by Sibuna

781. They declared war on us first, and the "List of Grievances" section of the declaration was just a link to a forum thread that contained every single one of the preceeding 780 reasons.

782. They R-34'd my forum avatar.

782.5. They have me as a sub instead of a dom.

783. I went to a free website from their country, and there was a crapton of ads every time I clicked on something.

783.5. I had to pay 20$ just to be ad-free for three months.

784. They made me use decimals for my list, which means that while I still technically have 1,000 reasons, there's really about 1,003

784.5. Okay, now there is 1,003.

edited 23rd Oct '14 8:09:41 AM by BlackMageAnolis

785. They held an independence referendum, and it's giving parts of my country ideas.

786. They gave me "ideas", and now I Am Horny, But Sex Is Evil.

787- They went over the One-Steve Limit

788- It's an extra credit project for my government class

789- They stole 40 cakes, And That's Terrible

790- Those were actually Kanade Minamino's 40 cakes. This Is Unforgivable!!

edited 23rd Oct '14 1:52:34 PM by aNinjaWithAIDS

791- We have been at war for 2000 years but forgot to act, no time like the present.

792- Someone littered on our side of the border.

793- They have a stupid looking flag.

794- ninjas.