1000 Bad Reasons To Declare War

890: Because we'll only need 110 more reasons after this war.

891. Their president's son eloped with our First Lady: some damned nonsense about the gods awarding her to him for judging a pick-up beauty pageant.

892: They refused to eat my cupcakes.

893: They tricked us into reading a story by titling it "Cupcakes."

894: I met a guy from that country once and he totally seemed like a jerk. Then he gave me all of his money, so clearly he's trying to cover something up.

895 - When we had an earthquake, those uptight pricks tried to send us vital aid. We don't need their charity. An invasion will make sure it never happens again.

896: THEY GOT THE POISON IN MY BLOOD!

897: They're withholding the antidote for the poison in my friend's blood.

898: They're a country of stereotypical 1940's Chinese gangsters.

899: They left me a raft instead of a parachute.

900: They blew up my damn plane!

901: Because they think they are dark and edgy.

902: Because they double post and have a deathwish.

903: Because they missed the chance to make a 90210 reference.

904: Because Beverly Hills is a vapid and shallow place.

905: Because they have probably never been to Beverly Hills and are talking out of their asses.

906: Because they're schizoid and talk to themselves, they must be unfit to lead themselves.

edited 26th Oct '12 8:06:04 PM by Journeyman

907: They double-post on forums.

edited 27th Oct '12 10:19:56 AM by PhysicalStamina

908: They repeat reasons already stated by their target.

909: They mess up the reason count.

edited 27th Oct '12 8:56:27 AM by Journeyman

910: They point out other people's mistakes.

• 911.They caused 911,
• 912.They spunked on the babies
• 913.They wank to ponies,
• 914.They claim to be gayer than Drew Pickles,
• 915.They accuse I.M Meen of being a pedo despite that he hates children.
• 916.Got all youtubers suspended by being Cartoon Network,
• 917.Trolls the forums and make our children cry,
• 918.It's a nasty kind of magic,from a special kind of guy
• 919.They called the police.RUN!
• 920.Unoriginal Twats.

921: We're the police! You are surrounded. Come out with your hands up, now!

922. They just bankrolled three new Seth McFarlane shows.

923. They embargoed us just as McRib was poised to come back.

edited 29th Oct '12 1:14:53 PM by Jhimmibhob

924: We need something to do.

925: They won't shut up about this hurricane.

926: They think hurricane Sandy isn't important.
927: The name of their home can't be shortened to an acronym, and thus they are inferior.

928: Their women actually have the right to vote. What the fuck is wrong with them?

929: Their state actually supports a secular government. What the fuck is wrong with them?

930: Their favorite type of music is dubstep. What the fuck is wrong with them?

931: Their state actually has universal healthcare subsidized by the government. What the fuck is wrong with them?

932: They don't worship the same deity(ies) or they do not believe in my deity(ies). What the fuck is wrong with them?

933: They have squatting toilets. What the fuck is wrong with them?

934: They spilled the milk of one of our tradesmen!

935: They cut off one of our Sailor's ears... then ate it!

936: Their ambassador sat on my throne and left a coffee stain on my rug!

937: They don't like Dubstep. They are thus an inferior nation and must be destroyed.

938: They started Hurricane Sandy.

939: My PC needs memory. I need to take my frustration out on something.

940: I didn't buy this tank for nothing.

941: Bad movie night was canceled, so I have to do something.

942. Their intelligence agency bankrolled a Heel Turn by the Masked Onion #2 ... right in the middle of his and Number One's championship round at our 12th international Tag-Teamferno.

943: They've smoken all the pot.

944. They smoked all my pot.

945. They smoked and actual pot.

946: They're blaming Canada. That's our job!