NOT THE BEES
It's not even remotely the most depraved thing that's been on this thread, it's just really wut-worthy.
Umm... what?
edited 24th Sep '12 11:00:08 PM by Malph
Eclipse the Moon
“Wadr plucked my tears with his fingers and raped his hands round me erotically.”
“Swag squeaks and claps his hands. ‘Oh my god, future-me totally popped your butt cherry, didn’t he?!’”
“Another time, also at a church bake sale, England showed up drunk again, and brought something with him. Something him made himself. A cake … shaped like a penis! (I didn’t get it at first because I thought it was a mushroom. England didn’t do the best of jobs shaping the cake, LOL.) He even added two scones for testicles! SCONE TESTICLES! The childrens did not like eating that cake. They said it tasted bad.”
dafuq?
I'm having to learn to pay the price
That would have been funnier if it had just been a 'shroom cake.
[Today's Jo Jo]
Fandom: Harry Potter
“Severus went into the Infirmary and walked in on Harry breastfeeding Ian. It was easily one of the most beautiful scenes he had ever seen.”
...While I don't want to slam breastfeeding or anything, I kinda doubt Snape gets outside often.
Fandom: BBC Sherlock
“Without any warning nor lubrication Jesus pushed the bible into John’s arse. John screamed….His ass was full of bible.”
:(
edited 25th Sep '12 4:48:19 PM by T-bone61
Eclipse the Moon
“‘So I’m gonna pass on a little gift my brother gave me, UZUMAKI WHORE! And this gift is meant for you and you alone! It is a curse I’ve saved especially for you, and I’ll make sure you never give it to anyone else; my last requiem!’
Sasuke plunged himself entirely into Naruto, and reached his peak. His hot seed flowed deep into the blonde, fast and hard, causing his tanned body to tremble and dragging a shriek from his parched throat. Sasuke beat his hips against Narutos, an insane light in his dark eyes. ‘RECEIVE MY AIDS!!!!!!’”
-chokes on laughter-
"RECEIVE MY AIDS!" is the best orgasm line after "Government Distributed
◊"
edited 26th Sep '12 1:20:24 AM by PippingFool
I'm having to learn to pay the price
You'll never see it coming.
(choking on potato chips)
I'm reading that line and I still can't believe that's an actual line.
"Oh no, Sanji's Chronic Simprosis!" - Kou The Mad
“Hitlers adughter goes to hogwarts with her firends and finds romances and adventure! This story is really good trust me i promise!”
Please be a troll...
Thank you so very much. I was in a bad mood until I read about the Hitler Daughter Hogwarts story.
Is that cake frosting?
![[up]](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/smiles/arrow_up.png "[up]"){kind=icon}
The typos make me suspect that it is.
Although the premise could possibly work, I think — it's delicate, obviously, but I could see being a genuinely interesting fiction.
edited 27th Sep '12 3:11:40 PM by Carciofus
But they seem to know where they are going, the ones who walk away from Omelas.
How fleeting...
“Fuck kurt said then blaine put his penis in kurt and he want uhhh and now they fucked and he rimmed him and then they fucked so then kurt goes uhhh and burt walks in and was like ‘waaats goin on’ and kurt was like ‘omg go away’ so burt did and blaine and kurt fucked longer it was hot and dey went uhh but then blaine cummed so kurt ate it and then spit it back in his mouth and den dey both got naked and rubbed penises and kurt kissed blaine and den tina walked in”
uh oh. i think i found glee's version of my immortal.
“Brady and Le Bron James had first met in 2008. They were the two biggest stars in Cleveland, and Brady had been curious since he came to town to find out if Le Bron was up for fucking him. One night in 2008, Brady went over to his buddy Grady Sizemore’s place for a party for local athletes. Le Bron was there, looking sexy in casual shorts and a tshirt. Brady kept trying to catch a glimpse of what was swinging between his legs, but he couldn’t get any intel.”
oh my god. pro sports yaoi!
“It had been a perfectly fine day for Mr. Darcy, until the highway robbers pulled him over.
‘Prince Edward? Prince Eric? Hercules? Why did you guys pull me over?’ he asked, lowering his sunglasses.
‘Because,’ panted Prince Eric, looking ragged and wild-eyed, ‘We invested all of our money in the yogurt market, and it crashed and went bankrupt after weasels took over the dairy corporation and replaced all the world’s milk with their own.’”
this is just weird.
“In the deepest pit of her heart, a fire awakened and spread throughout her whole, still nude, body. (I quoted that from a romantic novel or something…)”
okay, whatever floats your boat.
I don’t even know anymore.
NOT THE BEES
Uh...capitalism ho?
So that's what's different with my milk lately.
i. hear. a. sound.
[Today's Jo Jo]
“He threw his dildo across the room and curled up into a ball under his comforter fighting back his overwhelming grief and anger until exhaustion finally pulled him under.”
RAGE QUIT! RAGE QUIT!
If you guys think that pro sports yaoi is bad, wait until you see the torrid, torrid Tom Brady x Eli Manning Foe Yay smut I have heard of.
Eclipse the Moon
“John’s name is exotic and dangerous and dark. It sounds like sex under an orange cart in Cairo’s Khan el-Khalili Bazaar, and it makes John want to get laid in the back of a police car.”
“Slender Man quickly rammed said tentacle into Canada, making him moan in pain and pleasure. With the remaining tentacles, he pleasured himself, while he moved the tentacle inside Canada. ‘Slendy…S-Slendy…m-more…’ the Canadian cried out.”
[Today's Jo Jo]
...Guess who just added something new to his Bucket List? You get three tries, and the first two don't count.
“Next time… if you mate with our daughter… you’d better invite me to ‘play’ too..~”
Badfic used The Jibblies! It's super effective!
T-bone passed out...
“‘Why are you waving sushi around, you stupid louse.’
“Because once I eat this, I will finally gain enough energy for glorious binary fission!” ‘You’re buying fishing, what the fuck?’ Izaya ignored the moron and popped his favourite food into his mouth, and then to Shizuo’s horror, began to divide. ‘HOLY MOTHER OF FUCKING SHITCAKES!’”
To be fair, more than one Izaya would be pretty terrifying.
edited 30th Sep '12 6:49:35 PM by T-bone61
“‘What is rong, Jaosn?’ Jacob asked me, shirt rippling with mussles as his Native Indian face was perplexment. (Erin: BEST DESCRITPION EVER!)”
If this isn't a troll then it has to be 13-year-old girls.
i. hear. a. sound.
NOT THE BEES
Okay seriously, what's with the sudden preponderance of Nutella? That's like the third time I've seen it come up in WTF Fanfiction and its various spinoffs.
Cmdr. of His Supremacy's Armed Forces
Nutella's just that awesome.
But I wouldn't use it in sex. It's sticky as fuck and it'll never come off.
edited 2nd Oct '12 1:40:24 AM by Steventheman
FIMFiction Account MLPMST Page
PARTY PARTY PARTY I WANNA HAVE A PARTY
That Durarara!!! one is just great, partially because it actually has grammar and spelling that make some kind of sense. But mostly because GLORIOUS BINARY FISSION! and HOLY MOTHER OF FUCKING SHITCAKES!
edited 2nd Oct '12 5:20:06 AM by KSPAM
I've got new mythological machinery, and very handsome supernatural scenery. Goodfae: a mafia web serial
[Today's Jo Jo]
And Izaya is...actually pretty in-character. Can't forget that merit.
But wouldn't two Izayas start trying to screw each other over just as much as everyone else?
Wouldn't that kinda be a hindrance?
PARTY PARTY PARTY I WANNA HAVE A PARTY
No no no. Clearly the Izaya thing to do would be to recognize that two Izayas are better than one, and can achieve even more trolling than just one.
I've got new mythological machinery, and very handsome supernatural scenery. Goodfae: a mafia web serial
![[lol]](https://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/lol2v12_4863.png "[lol]")
Posts 747-750 sum up my feelings towards #746 exactly. Also, ew.
I liked it better when Questionable Casting was called WTH Casting Agency