Yours is a good relationship then, but most people are not able to do that as well.
No retreat, no surrender!
Zzzzzzzzzz
Danger Will Robinson! Danger!
Thread approaching "Sex Thread" status.
Retreat, retreat!
...if you don’t love you’re dead, and if you do, they’ll kill you for it.
Not to get this locked or anything, but I'd think since "sex" is in the title...
I'm convinced that our modern day analogues to ancient scholars are comedians. -0dd1
icon by implodingoracle
Can we continue the discussion more closely related to Society's Views of Love vs. The Four Loves or something like that?
edited 15th Aug '11 7:29:58 AM by Enzeru
My apologies for the necro
Anyway, in the first item of this Cracked article
(of course, this one is aware that such articles do not prove anything, but they can lead to some interesting ideas) briefly mentions that some of the common feelings associated with falling in love are in fact reactions on stress and anxiety associated with it. So they tend to disappear once people get to know each other and, most importantly, start feeling at ease around each other. However, due to ingrained ideas about what romance is "supposed to be", this loss of anxiety is often mistaken for "falling out of love".
Which leads to an interesting implication - people might think that their feelings disappeared while in fact their relationship 'just went good''. And so lose it right when it had a chance to work.
Thoughts?
edited 20th Sep '11 10:56:10 AM by Beholderess
If we disagree, that much, at least, we have in common
Yeah. That was the problem I ran into with my ex. When we started to "settle in" to our relationship, she began to state that our romance was "going downhill", since our infatuation with each other was not as strong as it was in the beginning. Because we were starting to see Real Life on equal par with our romantic feelings (in the beginning, I almost went broke trying to spend time with her, and had to scale back immensely later on), she thought that we weren't "compatible".
I don't know if she was just using this as an excuse to break up, but she seemed legitimately convinced that if romantic feelings couldn't remain 100% strong during the entire course of a relationship (or, somehow, gain strength throughout), that the relationship was a failure.
Same with my last girlfriend. It was just getting good, and then she broke up with me, on the grounds that she didn’t think it was going anywhere.
It’s a shame, really. Passion is something that can constantly be rekindled with the person that you’re with, and while that can sound like a chore, it’s remarkably easy to do, and the payoff is massive (considering that the two people in the relationship actually like each other and all that). But most people either don’t know how, or don’t put in the effort, thinking that it’s already “too late”, when really it’s just begun.
I've always disliked the "stress and anxiety" part of a relationship and hoped to get to the "being comfortable around each other" part more quickly.
^
I always feel so isolated from that sort of concept. I haven't had a lot of relationships in my life, but they've all been good ones where my partner and I were just that, partners.
My girlfriend and I now? We're 50/50 on almost everything. We divide up how often we both pay for stuff, neither one of us is overly dominant or submissive, and we tend to take turns in bed for who leads. It works pretty well, and to be honest I prefer it to letting one or the other lead all the time.