Your Dream Roster For Poker Night At The Inventory

Inspired by the rampant discussions going on in said game's WMG page. Basically, if you could choose any four characters to be in the next game (regardless of copyright restrictions or common sense) who would they be? Possible playing styles and bonus round items are optional. For me, I'd have to go with...

Kamina: Playstyle would be totally reckless, raising whenever a bet is placed regardless of whether or not his hand is any good, but also intimidating other players who can't tell whether or not he's bluffing. Bonus round items would could include his shades, katana and Yoko's gun.

Bender Bending Rodriguez: Playstyle also involves lots of bluffing, only with more of an emphasis on subtlety and deceit as opposed to sheer hot-bloodedness. Often tries to undermine the confidence of the other players. Bonus round items could include Fry's wallet, the unfinished Mona Lisa and Le Grand Cigar.

Dr. Eggman: Starts off acting careful and strategic but would become more and more aggressive the more desperate he becomes. Bonus round items could include a Chaos Emerald, the keys to his hover pod...thing and his moustache (how is that possible? I dont know either.)

Death: Arguably the most careful player in the game, folding often and waiting to the perfect opportunity to strike. Adept at taking advantage of other players' mistakes. Bonus round items could include his scythe, an hourglass and a guitar.

So, there's mine, how about yours?

edited 22nd Jul '11 11:04:51 AM by Qmarkthe2nd

the Engineer, the Adventure Sphere, Frank West, and Deadpool

edited 22nd Jul '11 11:10:29 AM by TechPowah

Yukari Yakumo, Alex, Lawrence Craft and Solid Snake.

Duke Nukem, Lara Croft, Gentleman Cho'Gath, Mario

Deadpool - Deadpool's playstyle would be random and chaotic, as his insane mind would be constantly changing strategies. He could put up Weasel's car or even Headpool (the still-living, severed head of his alternate universe zombie self) as a collateral. He would constantly make fun of the other players.

Johnny Cage - He's probably the most likely out of the MK cast to play poker. Johnny would be the bluffer, and could offer a film award as collateral. He would be incredibly overconfident until he loses, in which he'd say one of the Elder Gods was probably messing him up.

Chuck Greene (as opposed to Frank West, who was already said) - His playstyle would be pretty conservative, but aggressive at the right moments. His collateral offer could one of the combo weapons. He might ask someone if they've seen any Zombrex laying around, or that he's glad this isn't strip poker like in his game, especially with Deadpool around.

Randy Marsh - Randy would play fairly well at the beginning, but he will make a few stupid mistakes throughout the game, sometimes ones he can't come back from. His collateral could be a copy of Backdoor Sluts 9, which Deadpool will desperately try to win, Johnny Cage will pretend he doesn't care but will still try to get it, and Chuck will be more neutral.

edited 22nd Jul '11 12:00:41 PM by foodbattle

the Sniper: Aggressive as hell player, constantly belittling the other players and trying to get them to fold.

• Special item: his Rifle or an ice trap.

Quan Chi: A very conservative player, appearing to use mindgames and reverse psychology. If he keeps winning, he gets complacent.

• Special Item: The Amulet of Shinnok.

Joanna Dark: Another aggresive player, although not to the extent of the Sniper, Jo is more or less the vanilla player with few special patterns.

• Special Item: Jack Dark's DY-357.

the Sniper: The most conservative player stat, not betting large amounts in any situation. Does not like the Sniper.

• Special Item: His van.

edited 22nd Jul '11 12:12:25 PM by Plumbum

Bender: Plays like he did in Into The Wild Green Yonder, relying on blind luck and is incredibly smug about it. However, because of this it's very hard to tell when he has a good hand and when he's bluffing. Dialogue wise he's...Bender, 'nuff said. His unlock would be Leela's jacket, which functions as miscellaneous item for the Scout, Soldier, and Heavy.

The Emperor of Mankind: On break from his weekly poker games with Tzeentch, Cegorach, and The Deceiver. He plays very deceptively, often looking like he'll lose initially then rake in large amounts of cash at critical moments. Dialogue involves reminiscing about the Great Crusade, digs at the Chaos Gods, and dodging questions about why he's not on the Golden Throne right now. His unlock is a big, glowing, incredibly bling-encrusted, Power Sword that acts as generic melee weapon for the Scout, Soldier, Demoman, Sniper and Medic.

Gabe: He plays the exact opposite of Tycho, playing recklessly until he realizes he might lose then playing conservatively. His dialogue is like in the webcomic, ranging anywhere from Cloud Cuckoolander to full-on Psychopathic Manchild, and of course truck loads of game references. Not sure what his unlock would be.

Samus Aran: She plays the most straightforward out the four, no real gimmicks or anything. She rarely speaks, mostly responding to the others with a myriad of facial expressions, generally acting as the Straight Woman. Though she gets teensy-bit pissed when anyone references Other M. Noticing her facial tics is integral to figuring out if she's bluffing or not. Her unlock would be the emergency pistol she used in Zero Misson, which acts as pistol re-skin for the Scout and Engie.

edited 22nd Jul '11 1:12:15 PM by Neo_Crimson

Following the pattern of Telltale License, Web Animation, Valve, and Webcomic:

• Gromit: Very conservative player (similar to Tycho), betting the Wrong Trousers.
• Caboose: Has no idea how to play the game (similar to Max), bets his own brain.
• Nick: Tries to force everyone to gradually ante up but ultimately rational (similar to the Heavy), bets his suitcase full of guns.
• T-Rex: Aggressive but shallow player (similar to Strong Bad), bets a log cabin.

Alternate set:

• Sam: Very conservative player (similar to Tycho), bets his De Soto
• Stick-figure dude: Aggressive but shallow (similar to Strong Bad), bets a book of martial arts
• Wheatley: Has no idea how to play the game (similar to Max), bets the whole Aperture Science Enrichment Center
• USMC LCpl Abe: Tries to make everyone ante up (similar to the Heavy), bets a Rip-It drink

Heh, I can see that happening.

Samus: *Looks at her current hand skeptically*

Bender: "What's the matter, baby, Adam didn't give you permission to bet yet?"

Samus: *Death Glare* "All in."

edited 22nd Jul '11 4:36:25 PM by Qmarkthe2nd

Gene: Fast and loose with bets and bluffs a lot. But watch out more often than not he can back that bet up. Trash talks against all the characters. Rival with Mao....since he kills demons. Gives up (Replica) God hand.

Mao The Insane Character. Cannot be predicted but can be easily told....most of the time. Talks about experimenting and enhancing the other players. Rivalry with Gene since Mao is a demon. Gives up sword and a gun.

Luxord The Conservative Player. Bets Big when he has a hand he thinks can win. Bluffs the least of the 4. Talks about gambling and other Organisation related things. hard to tell, since he is a nobody and has no emotions. Give special Card Dog tags and a dice launcher.

DemomanAnother Conservative better. Bluffs a lot more to threaten players out of the pot. Will play if good hand however. Talks about his loss of his eye, how his drinking is ruining his life and how he threatens to blow up the place if he loses. Drunken rage can also apply. Give special Sticky launcher.

I don't think Gabe would really be a good character. He really really really doesn't know how to play the game.

Then again, that didn't stop Max.

I don't know about a full roster, but for just 1 character:

Guybrush Threepwood: An eternal bluffer, which makes it hard to tell if he's really bluffing or not. Capable of getting quite serious when he's on a roll, though. Would make the requisite Monkey Island jokes. Perhaps stuff about the interface of his previous games, regaling people with stories of his piracy exploits, and other things (like referring to the "second biggest pot" he's ever played for). Prize would be a bottle of genuine Ghost-Destoying Voodoo Root Beer, a Scrumpy Bottle equivalent.

edited 22nd Jul '11 5:12:47 PM by Enlong

Grace: She would be a REALLY good bluffer but she doesn't fold that often. She would put Tedd's TG gun as an ante.

edited 22nd Jul '11 6:31:40 PM by stevebat

Doctor Emmett Brown: Usually plays in an oddball fashion, betting and bluffing at the wrong times, but plays excellently if he stays in the game due to his knowledge of the future. Discussions often show off his scatterbrained mindset. Amazed at how GLaDOS works, dislikes Yahtzee. Offers a hoverboard which acts like the Demoman's shield.

GLaDOS: Plays calmly and methodologically, only resorting to dirty tactics when she's losing. Bluffs often. Mocks her fellow players. Bets an Aperture Science Inventory Expanding Unit, an Aperture Science Miniature Portal System, and turrets that replace the Engineer's buildings.

Yahtzee: Plays and talks aggressively. Indifferent with Doc Brown, idolizes GLaDOS, hates Ethan. Bets a spiked horse-size dildo, which replaces the Scout's bat, and an imp which follows the player around in TF2.

Ethan McManus: As with his comic self, he acts like Max when it comes to cards. Obviously acts like a douchebag to everyone, except for GLaDOS (he feigns interest in her, but it's obvious he hasn't even played Portal). Hated by everyone, Doc Brown included. Offers his Wintereenmas crown (hat for any class), staff (replaces Pyro's axe), and his unborn child (strapped to the player's stomach in TF2).

edited 22nd Jul '11 7:15:15 PM by Torquey

Space Core and Fact Core, for the lulz. Space Core's lines should pertain directly to SPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACE, while Fact Core always tells you the opposite of what he's doing when he's bluffing or etc.

"Fact: The Fact Core has a better hand than you."

^Technically, his/its name is Incorrect Trivia Core. I think.

edited 22nd Jul '11 9:10:31 PM by RocketDude

Though it would sometimes be accurate, to screw over your predictions. Because, as it turns out, some of his facts are, in fact, facts.

- Shrugs-

I am the sort of person that would believe that any of the Team Fortress 2 characters would fit in well.

But since we must do it :

- The Brain

- The Soldier

- Jonathan Carnahan

- Annie

edited 22nd Jul '11 9:19:09 PM by OrangeSpider

The soldier's item could be a set of medals that he won for his services in the war, which he was invited to. Medals that he was given by a superior officer that he totally had. Medals that are absolutely NOT modified bottle caps.