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WMG / Poker Night at the Inventory

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Characters for a Supposed Sequel
(Note: Any "sequel" guesses made after the announcement of Poker Night 2 can be guesses for a third Poker Night game.)

If a sequel is made, I predict Guybrush Threepwood, Phoney Bone, Francis, and possibly Tycho's pal Gabe, though that last one seems a bit iffy to this troper.

  • Always bet on Duke, baby!
  • I doubt a sequel will be made, but if so I belive that Sam, Phoney Bone, The Cheat, or Gabe will be in.
  • I think it would be DLC. Next up would be Sam, Homestar, the Spy, and Gabe.
    • Uh, Homestar isn't very smart; I can't picture him playing Poker. Maybe Bubs?
      • Yeah, but that's what makes it fun. Strong Bad even mentions Poker Night at Homestar's, which means he's probably familiar with the game. Also, imagine a conversation between Homestar and the Spy. Pure hilarity.
      • Well, you've got a point. As for Gabe, I'm hoping Telltale would at least be prudent enough not to have him show everyone his balls, as Tycho says he does. Why would he not? Well, he could have such a reason as, "Not outside MY home!" or "Tycho isn't here." Of course, this troper doesn't know much about Penny Arcade...
      • Gabe really doesn't know how to play poker. There was a comic where Tycho pretty much sabotaged his learning the game ("I have the hole card. That means I win everything")
      • Max doesn't know how to play, either, but that doesn't stop him. 'Course, maybe Gabe doesn't enjoy banter as much as Max. Like I said, his being in the game's sequel seems iffy.
  • Nick would be a fairly obvious choice, him being a card player and all. I'd like it if Engineer could play too, seems like a fun guy to hang around with. Plus, Heavy mentions it was Engineer who showed him the Inventory.
    • Ellis would be fun to have in the game, too. As for the Engineer… Well, really, almost ALL of the Team Fortress 2 classes are eligible, the possible exceptions being Pyro (who can't speak and whose face cannot be read) and maybe Scout (who isn't the most patient character out there).
      • In fact, I can picture one of the Sniper's quotes for raising. "You call that a bet? (tosses more chips into the pot) THIS is a bet!"
  • Murray with the skeleton body he briefly had in Chapter 3 of Tales. Just imagine how his bluffs would sound.
  • Also, if female characters are eligible, I wouldn't mind seeing Laverne...of course this is largely dependent on the franchise being revived.
  • My theories:
    • Doctor Emmet Brown: The Characters need to be fun with converse with, and have the license relatively easy to obtain. Telltale has the BTTF license, so it wouldn't be too hard. Playstyle is a mix of Strong Bad's bluffing and Tycho's Cautiousness. Unlock would be a Brain-Wave Analyzer hat and BTTF blueprints [Building Reskins, like the teleporter has a speedometer and starts working at 88, etc.] for the Engineer.
      • Heavy mentions listening to Huey Lewis. Coincidence?
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    • RED Spy: We need another Team Fortress 2 character, as the reason many bought the game in the first place is because of the Heavy and the Unlocks. The original game contained two outrageously crazy guys [Strong Bad, Max] and two others, crazy but quiet [Heavy, Tycho]. Spy fills the quiet quota, others at the table could accuse him of sapping their cards, and he would tell stories about Scout's Mom. Unlock would be a handcarved Butterfly Knife.
      • RED Scout. He and the Heavy have even more in common. Nameless, the Sandvich. Plus, he has the most catchphrases ("BONK!") and is a braggart.
      • The Engineer would be another likely candidate. He seems like he would be a mix of Tycho's straight-man role with Max's easygoing "I'm here to have fun!" persona- basically, the casual guy who enjoys playing and is good at it, but takes a loss well and enjoys the conversation. Also, he could show off some awesome card tricks with the Gunslinger.
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    • Wario or Bowser: It wouldn't be the first time a Mario villain like Bowser got represented in a crossover all by himself if we got a Poker Night game for the Nintendo Switch.
    • Homestar: Makes high bets based on random things. Gives out a Homestarmy Set for the Soldier when defeated [Orange Bowl and Wooden Spoon Melee].
  • How about Dr. Kleiner? The unlockable item could be Lamaar, in which all TF2 classes would get a headcrab hat.
    • 1 problem with the unlock; Lamaar got launched into outer space in Half-Life 2: Episode 2.
      • How 'bout his glasses for the Medic? And his labcoat for Gaige in Borderlands 2?
  • If Telltale wants to add another web series, Perhaps Yahtzee from Zero Punctuation as the stick figure we usually see in the series. Alternatively, they could also draw characters from other indie games like Captain Smiley.
  • Doctor Breen, anyone?
    • Unfortunately, his voice actor is deceased.
      • How about Alex, then? Or a Vortigaunt? Or Barney Calhoun?
  • I would like John Freeman, or the Doomguy. Or Both.
    • The problem is John Freeman doesn't really have a voice actor. All of his voice acting is done by the guy doing the dramatic reading, and I doubt that people would want The Other Darrin.
  • How about Raz? He can provide some pretty good banter.
    • He's also ten years old. Fictional or not, No one under 18 is allowed in a speakeasy.
      • Tell that to Strong Bad ("Aren't you, like, ten?")
    • Not to mention that having a powerful psychic in a poker game wouldn't exactly be very fair.
      • You're forgetting about Max. He informs everybody that he's not using his psychic powers, and Raz could do the exact same.
  • How about "Ladies' Night"? GLaDOS, Marzipan, Elaine Marley, and Zoey.
    • What about the Scout's mother?
    • Pyro?
  • Telltale said that celebrities were a possibility in a sequel. This Troper hopes that Gorillaz counts! Maybe, say... Jim Carrey? Robin Williams?
    • Lady Gaga. Can't read her Poker Face.
      • If Telltale's fine with internet celebrities, how about Arin "Egoraptor" Hanson, Jon "Jontron" Jafari, and Markiplier?
      • Egoraptor? Forget him, we need a character from Girlchan in Paradise!! in there. Kenstar would be my best bet. Could you imagine what his dialog would sound like? Nonstop hilarity! And we'd finally find out what happened after the end of Episode 3!
      • Ted, from Ambition. He seems like a poker-playing sort. And we've already got one line of dialogue set for him:
    If I don't get a good hand this time, I'm going to blow us all to hell!
  • If another Team Fortress 2 character is in the sequel, they'll probably be from the BLU team (can't let the REDs have all the fun). Also, Telltale has the license to Jurassic Park and that's just begging for a dinosaur playing poker.
    • Except that the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park aren't smart enough to play Poker. Not even the Velociraptors. Besides, how would they hold the cards? No opposable thumbs! Maybe Dr. Alan Grant instead (if he appears in the game).
  • I would like to have Scott Pilgrim, The Kid, Setzer, and The Joker.
    • This troper agrees with you on The Joker being in the game, and for added funny, throw in Deadpool!
    • The Kid would probably use high-risk tactics, bet his cape and pistol for unlockable scout items and comment of all the things that try to kill him on a daily basis.
    • The Kid from Bastion? I don't know? Wouldn't Rucks be better?
    • According to Bryan Lee O'Malley's Twitter, Telltale actually approached him about making a Scott Pilgrim game. He rejected, but the possibility's still there.
  • The Assault from Monday Night Combat.
    • Almost any of the classes from Monday Night Combat, really...the exceptions being the Assassin and possibly the Sniper (whose voice would get annoying after a while).
    • Fuck that, it'd just be funny as hell to weird out the other players with the mime Assassin.
  • Bosco, The Master Chief, Tedd Verres and Phoenix Wright.
  • If Telltale has a crossover with Nippon Ichi, which I personally think is merely a matter of inevitability, Etna will DEFINITELY be in the sequel. She'll probably be bettin' big all the time to intimidate the competition, and will try to use her sex appeal to distract the mostly male opponents. The hilarity comes from the latter UTTERLY failing, due to them being either Cloud Cuckoo Landers, Ambiguously Gay, or outright disgusted to the point of the strategy working in the entirely different direction.
    • One of her Prinnies would be there with her, playing the same role as Max and Steve do to Sam and Claptrap, respectively, in Poker Night 2.
  • Commander Shepard, preferably Femshep. She's clearly rich enough to play, and reasonably funny to boot. Unlocks could be an N7 helmet and a Cain for The Soldier.
    • Legion. Unlock would be a Mass Effect style sniper rifle, or a scope designed around a Geth head.
  • Silent Protagonists from first person shooters as playable characters. We'll only see their hands (if they check or when they bet) just like how we only see their hands in their respective games. There's far too many to list here, but among them would be the Chief, Ramirez, or Jack.
  • Gendo Ikari.
    • "Hm." *steeples fingers.* "All in."
    • drunk!Misato for the girls.
  • Assuming we're staying with the same licenses, or only within licenses Telltale has at the moment (being realistic here), why not Sam, Homestar, Gabe, and The Medic? Was I the only one expecting them to all at least make a cameo in the first game?
    • Seconded. I think it's no coincidence that the first game's characters are all part of [famous duos. Plus, the sequel's about a murder, and lord knows at least Medic, Gabe, and Sam would have a ball with that.
    • After Penny Arcade's recent landblasting of TF2 for the whole Free-To-Play thing, maybe Gabe won't be in it after all...the hidden chat did suggest Murder At The Inventory, right? So let's replace Gabe with Nelson Tethers. And hey, it'd be an excuse to somehow win his Nice Hat.
      • This Troper thinks that feud might've died down, considering Valve didn't seem to mind that On the Rainslick Precipice of Darkness Episode 3 was being sold on Steam. Of course, this Troper has been wrong before...
    • The characters are supposed to be interesting, right? As far as I've seen, Sam's about as interesting a character as a tree stump.
      • Probably why Telltale had Max accompany Sam in Poker Night 2.
  • Bender and Dr. Doofenshmirtz. Though due to liscensing and content, it'd probably be impossible.
    • Bender wouldn't be so much of a stretch...unless Telltale has some sort of conflict with Fox that I haven't heard of...
  • Wallace and/or Gromit. Wallace being able to talk helps, but Gromit makes a good Straight Man to anybody.
  • Considering the Colbert Bump he gave to the game, would it be that much of a stretch to have Totalbiscuit in there?
    • Yes, yes it would.
  • I'm guessing Commander William T. Riker, John Freeman, Shinji Ikari, Gabriel Angelos, and Abel.
  • I've got a better idea. All of the above.
  • A pony, whether it be Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie, or Ditzy Doo/Derpy Hooves.
    • Maybe we could have Lyra Heartstrings and her fascination for hands.
    • And while we're at it, let's add a Neopet. What? It's WMG, after all.
    • How about a tamagatchi?
  • Wheatley as one of the first unlockable opponents, and the easiest to beat, offering Space Core as the buy-in. And the last and hardest to beat, boasting the ultimate poker face and very little banter, Chell, with the Portal Gun as her prize.
  • Astrid offering up Blade of Woe (cosmetic Spy dagger replacement) as her buy-in.
  • Steve? offering up Diamond boots (Gunboats replacer) as buy-in.
  • Misty, Saranoia, Heather and The Ghost of Joan of Arc.
  • After a thorough reading of the above, This Troper has concluded that the perfect new opponents would be:
    • The Joker replacing Max as the crazy homicidal one. His unlock would be Harley's Hammer for the Pyro.
    • Big Macintosh replacing the Heavy as the intimidating but surprisingly intelligent one. His unlock would be apples to replace the soldier's grenades (imagine the Equalizer's taunt with them).
    • Tedd Verres replacing Tycho as the snarky mildly pervy expert. His unlock would be a spare set of glasses for the Engie.
    • Finally, we would have Ms. Scarlet replacing Strong Bad because having the same thing with different characters would be boring. Her unlock would be a bloody kitchen knife for the spy.
  • Here is my idea:
    • raocow, in roo525's animation style, replacing Max as the cheery/chatty guy. He'd have a cat planet cat sitting on the table in front of him, which he'd interact with in a few ways and other players would ask about. His personality would be a mixture of Breathless Non Sequitur raocow and whatever he's like when not playing a video game, and Post-production raocow will sometimes inexplicably talk to him. He has two unlocks: A fire flower he got from Jeremy, that can be worn as a badge, and the cat planet cat hat Chibi-cow wears.
      • Raocow: "Hey Allen, how do you even remember which spell you have chosen from the list?" Jerry: "Are you talking to me? My name is Jerry, you know."
    • Ian Hecox, in the cartoony style from the True Story videos, replacing Strong Bad as the guy who thinks he can win everytime. His unlock would be a pink frosted sprinkled donut (a chocolate donut if you're on BLU) which is thrown like a grenade, does the same thing as either Mad Milk or Jarate (depending on your class), is usable for Scout and Sniper, and its taunt is your character pressing the easy button. Once you get 4 kills in a row with the donut, your taunt changes into your character yelling their variation of "kill them all" at the button, and can kill anyone on the other team within 500 Hammer units.
      • Ian: "If my mom finds out i lost this much money she'll kill me. Again. Literally." Raocow: "I don't think you meant to say literally, because in a literal sense, a thing with opinions can only have exactly fifty-three 1-Ups if not restricted by a bottle of ketchup." Ian: "Wait, what." Raocow: "Sorry for that, i just can't help it sometimes."
    • The BLU Spy, in a different suit, replacing the Heavy, not only as the Team Fortress 2 character but also as the intimidating guy. His unlock will be a paper mask. The mask looks different from the regular disguises (to avoid confusion), and would have a hand-drawn Engineer face on the front.
      Spy: Say, Hecox, was it? Does death feel any different to you?
      Ian: It's painful, but I always suddenly come back to life within a few hours.
      Spy: I know zat feel.
    • Jerry, still wearing his costume, voiced by either Dark Yoshi / Zephyr Burst himself or his roommate Jerry. Raocow will call him Allen, but he will insist on being called Jerry. Replaces Tycho as the expert. His unlock will be his Red Right Hand (or left hand, as is the case) as a glove, which replaces the melee weapon of any character except Engineer, Spy, and Demoman. It lets you attack with the metal claw Jerry attacks with. You can change the style, which changes the color of the claw (not the glove itself) to either white, red, blue, green or brown. The styles are named Mental Insurrection, Blast Off, Flood, Blast Shield and Nature's Gift.
      Jerry: I bet you guys think Kirby's Dreamland is ridiculously hard.
    • Also, i don't care how unlikely it is. This is WMG.
  • Poker Night at Disneyland: Timon, Mabel Pines, Mr. Incredible, and Oswald the lucky Rabbit.
    • Mabel? What are you, crazy?! Grunkle Stan fits MUCH better.
  • Dan, just because he would fit in so perfectly.
  • Master Xehanort, Spyro the Dragon, Kratos and Cole MacGrath
  • A Red vs. Blue character would be nice. Grif would probably enjoy a day off to go play some poker.
  • There's going to be a sequel after all, and judging by the promotional items included in the 13 March 2013 update of Team Fortress 2, the next competitors will be from Borderlands 2 (Handsome Jack or Claptrap), The Venture Bros. (Most likely Brock Samson), Sam & Max: Freelance Police (signs pointing towards Sam), Evil Dead (Evil Ash, perhaps?) and Portal (not sure about it for now...)
    • I'm personally thinking the Portal character would be GLaDOS, Wheatley, or someone of the sort.
      • Well, the screenshots, revealed recently as of this edit, show the players (other than The Player him/herself, that is) to be Brock, Claptrap, Ash, and Sam. GLaDOS is also there, but she's not playing. Instead she's hanging overhead, apparently watching the game. Perhaps she's the dealer?
      • All of which confirmed.
  • The Tick and/or Freakazoid!.
  • Axe Cop, The Great and Powerful Trixie, Sly Cooper, Bigby Wolf
    • Bigby seems the most likely one among those four there as of the time of this edit!
  • Poker Night at the Inventory UK edition: The Cat, Edmund Blackadder, the eleventh Doctor, Wallace
  • One of the Ghostbusters.
  • How about Zoey from Left 4 Dead? We haven't had any female opponents yet, and it would be adorable to see a horror fan like her Squee! over meeting Ash Williams.
  • One of the many characters from Skullgirls.
    • In particular: either Peacock or Parasoul, or maybe even Ms. Fortune
  • Someone that hasn't been suggested yet: Sterling Archer
  • I know it's already Jossed, but Optimus Prime.
  • Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third, Merida, Jack Frost and Rapunzel.
  • If Telltale wanted another webcomic to throw into the mix, one of the Midnight Crew could work. Each member even seems to fit the pattern of the poker players so far (see below).
  • One of many characters from Twin Peaks, in particular either Agent Dale Cooper, Regional Bureau Chief Gordon Cole or Killer BOB, or as a dealer, The Man From Another Place. Their unlocks would be the Red Room from Twin Peaks, or something specialized to the character's personality.
  • One of the members of the Bebop, although Faye would have the most experience in poker.
  • If they're gonna have another Valve character, it should probably be someone from Left 4 Dead; they already had Team Fortress 2 in the first game, and Portal in the second.
  • I think we should remember that there will probably be new table felts, card decks, and sets of chips for each character, and using the three poker things with the same theme will unlock a new layout for the Inventory. For example, a Left 4 Dead theme for Francis or Zoey, the Bebop space ship for the Cowboy Bebop characters, Homestar Runner characters could have Club Technochocolate, and the RED base for the TF2 characters, unless they use a BLU member, in which case, BLU base.
    • ...Hmm... A dungeon or fantasy-genre pub as a Penny Arcade theme for the Inventory, since Tycho and Gabe seem to be Dungeons & Dragons fans.
  • RED Scout, Pinkie Pie, Dave Strider and The Doctor.
  • One of the Vault Hunters, former or otherwise. Pretty sure there'd be a lot of folks who'd prefer them to Claptrap.
  • Murphy Pendleton from Silent Hill: Downpour.
  • Homer Simpson; wouldn't be the first time he played poker. 'Course, he wouldn't be easy to play against; anyone who has seen that one episode of The Simpsons would know what this troper means! Marge could play, too, but this doesn't seem too likely.
  • If Telltale wanted any more [adult swim] shows, how about Master Shake, Frylock, Meatwad, or Carl? Shake would be the jerk, like Strong Bad, Frylock would either be the straight man to the other players' antics or just the quiet one, Meatwad would be the one that doesn't really know how to play, and Carl would tell stories about the crap he has to put up with by living next to the Aqua Teens.
  • Rapid-fire suggestions, GO! Zoro, Nami, Usopp, Sanji, Robin, or Brook. Ruby, Tom, Daisy, or John (the latter coming from a joke thread that apparently had at least a little canon moment in the main story. the original, "funny villain" version of Stewie. Yakko Warner and/or the Brain (fans of the shows these two came from would have to be adults by now). Whew.
  • Crow T. Robot or Tom Servo.
  • Maybe someone from South Park? Cartman would probably be the funniest, although he's underage. Granted, he'd find some way to get into the game.
    • Randy Marsh would be a better idea for this.
  • Abridged Kaiba
  • Celestia Ludenberg?
  • One of the Grand Theft Auto protagonists. Maybe Trevor, Niko, or CJ (whose 3D model still isn't updated).
  • Rick Sanchez. If you can't get Doc Brown to play do to the game being too mature for him, why not his drunken, sociopathic cousin?
  • One of the heroes from dota 2 perhaps? The "Face" of the game, Axe, or other slightly less iconic heroes like Sven, Wraith King, Invoker, Pudge, Miranna, and such.
  • The silent edition: Gordon Freeman, Chell, Steve, and Gromit. (No I am not being serious.)
  • Since Sam and Max have been characters in both games, why not have Sam AND Max in the next? Or maybe Sybil?
  • Maybe one of the animatronics? Perhaps Foxy, to provide some amount of witty pirate banter.
  • Jesse, Axel, or Olivia. Or maybe Magnus, with his interesting personality and griefing habits.
  • A member of The Order of the Stick, probably Belkar or Haley.
  • In the sequel, Claptrap realizes that the four of them represent "The Four Pillars of Geekdom": Comics, Movies, Video Games and TV. A roster for Poker Night 3, following this formula:
    • Deadpool, representing comics, is the insane fourth-wall breaking chatterbox, bringing to mind Max and Claptrap, while also dropping F-bombs all over the place, resembling Tycho. His bounty item could be his guns and/or kitanas, and his alternate outfit could be his X-Force uniform.
    • Solid Snake/ Raiden, representing video games, are, regardless of who plays, The Comically Serious player who shares war stories, resembling Heavy and Ash, while being annoyed by Deadpool by being fanboyed on for Snake, or having to put up with memes from MGS2 such as "I need scissors! 61!" for Raiden. They're bounty items could be the Infinity Bandana (Snake) or Sam's Murasama (Raiden), and their alternate outfit could be one of Big Boss' fatigues/ the Skull Suit.
    • Han Solo, representing film, is a Deadpan Snarker who nevertheless is friendly with the other players aside from Deadpool taunting him about "the Force". His bounty item would be either his blaster or one of Luke's lightsabers, and his alternate outfit could be his Force Awakens outfit.
    • The Eleventh Doctor, representing TV, is the unfazed everyman who talks about his experiences with time and space travel, and tolerates Deadpool, but briefly scares him by talking about the Weeping Angels. His bounty item could be his Sonic Screwdriver, and his alternate outfit could be one of his previous regenerations.
    • Classic competitors from the last 2 games could also be featured, taking the place of a regular player who is absent from the table for whatever reason. This would lead to humorous moments such as:
      • Tycho getting held at gunpoint by the other players again, but this time just to keep him from going into another bestiality monologue.
      • Deadpool and Strong Bad accusing each other of being ripoffs because of their similar mask designs.
      • Deadpool and Sam realizing that their professions aren't that far apart (Deadpool usually gets called by someone who pays him to kill someone else, and Sam & Max get paid by and go on cases for the Comissioner, and said cases usually end with someone's death).
      • Snake and Han realizing how dull it is at the table without Wade at the table, only to quickly realize that Max is a more than worthy substitute.
      • Snake hearing about one of Sam and Max's cases, then saying that he's seen weirder.
      • An offscreen Bar Brawl resulting in Snake humiliating Flint Paper, who's subsequent attempts on Snake's life and inability to accept that Snake's better than him result in him getting injured more and more. It culminates when Sam, oblivious to Flint's intentions, finds Snake's address for him. The resulting confrontation apparently ends with Flint's collarbone being broken.
      • The entire table (which includes Snake, Ash and the Doctor) reeling in shock when they find out Deadpool is married (to a succubus, but still).
      • Deadpool asking why Ash doesn't have his Chainsaw hand, and learning that Ash got rid of it because he couldn't work the clasp and it looked dumb.
      • Deadpool bringing up the Ocean Marketing incident.
  • For the said part, why not give a Dream Match Game approach?
  • Yang Xiao Long from RWBY. She could get in by threat despite being underage. Roman Torchwick is another candidate.
    • Ruby Rose. Her item would be Crescent Rose, a reskin of the Scotsman's Skullcutter used by Demoman. Yang's item would be Ember Celica, a reskin of Heavy's stock fists, with a special version of the Showdown taunt involving firing one of the gauntlets. Alternatively, Ruby/Yang's Bounty Challenge would be all four of Team RWBY's weapons (Myrtenaster would be a reskin of the Half-Zatoichi or Persian Persuader, and Gambol Shroud would be in its gun configuration as a reskin of the stock SMG).
  • THE GREAT PAPYRUS! ...or Sans.
  • Samus Aran, Star Lord, Batman, and Mikasa Ackerman.
  • An all-Disney cast. Your opponents would be Flynn Ryder (Zachary Levi), Rocket Raccoon (Bradley Cooper), Han Solo (Harrison Ford if it can be helped), and Stan Pines (Alex Hirsch), with Genie (preferably Dan Castellaneta since Robin Williams is dead and Jim Meskimen is...meh) as the dealer.

The Heavy's clash in opinion regarding his job.
It seems the Heavy both regrets and loves his job. However, his sadistic personality is simply a coping mechanism, with his talk of nightmares and suffering being hints to the others to avoid the mercenary business. The reason he tells the story about the sparrow when asked about fun tales? Why he treats the act of shoving a wrench down a man's throat and tearing off his fingers as a joke? He's trying to gently steer the others away from the path he himself has gone down.

The Player is Gordon Freeman.
Haven't seen much of him and it makes sense considering the Player's speechlessness. Could joke about Gordon's pokerface.
  • Alternatively only male players are Gordan Freeman. Female players are Chell.
    • During the scene where everybody points their guns at Tycho, Chell whips out her portal gun with the intention of sending him to the moon like Wheatley.
  • The above is now canon in this troper's mind as well.
  • And mine. Hell, I was about to post this when somebody beat me to it.
  • Fanon has spoken! This is as official as it gets! Now go and write fanfics!
  • The Player has always been You in this troper's mind. Nobody special, just the actual person playing.
  • If that's the case, then a Freeman's Mind video for this game would be appropriate, not to mention HILARIOUS! Or a Chell's Mind. Hell, any of the Mind series characters would be good in that game!
  • Jossed: Word of God confirms that The Player is You. Poker Night 2 canon is that you did very well in the first game, by the way.

Symbolic Poker Player Archetypes
Your opponents would all love to win, but they approach the game with vastly different attitudes. Let's compare!

Max: The cheery/chatty guy who's there more to chat than play. Often the guy who'll get a conversation started. He's also the kind of guy who doesn't mind losing. Heck, he'll sometimes say "That was fun!" without sarcasm when he busts out.

Strong Bad: That guy who thinks he can totally win the game every time, easy. He also happens to lose every time, easy (or at least, that's the case for this troper). Not as great a player as he wants you to believe.

The Heavy: The big guy who specializes in intimidation tactics. For one thing, he's already the Big Guy. For another thing, he loves to goad you into a challenge ("Time to show your honor. Can you beat me?").

Tycho: The expert. Seems know exactly what he's doing all the time and is brimming with non-stop confidence. Not exactly a stop having fun guy, but its clear he's got a lot of experience and he's way more serious about winning the game than the other characters.

The boy who killed the sparrow grows up to be The Spy.
He's trained as an assassin that uses a knife and flees after killing his victim. The story would also explain why the Heavy hates Spies so much despite not being one of the most Spy vulnerable classes.
  • But wait, why would the French Spy be in Russia? And actually, if a Spy can get behind a Heavy, there's only one way that's turning out.
    • it was an assassination camp, and the Spy has a very mixed accent, it's possible he was in Russia at some point for training.
      • Or perhaps it was indeed Spy, but not actually as a student, but on his first mission. He was out to demoralize the recruits and sabotage their training. Because he's a jerk like that.
  • Slightly irrelevant, but Heavies are ridiculously weak to Spies. Good Spies, anyway. Lots of back = lots of room for backstabbing. Probably the most susceptible next to Snipers and maybe Engineers.

The Player is Red.
This troper had a little bit of Fridge Brilliance lying in bed last night. Consider the followingnote :
  • The Player isn't known to have any prior experience playing poker but is an instant expert. Red didn't have any prior training experience, but quickly became the best throughout the land (like no one ever was).
  • Heroic Mime. Need I say more?
  • There are a couple references to Pokemon. Strong Bad calls Max one, and suggests that it'd be funny if a spiky-haired kid tried to shove him in a baseball. Hmmm... perhaps he's trying to fool the Player into catching, and therefore taking out, the competition?
  • One of Tycho's win quotes is "I'm not playing Pokemon cards here!" An obvious insult.
  • Upon beating Tycho, he'll reference Gabe "showing his balls," commending you on your restraint, and then he goes back and asks if the Player is going to do that now. He's suddenly worried that he's given a rather nasty idea to an immature, impressionable eleven-year-old.
    • Or maybe he was talking about Red's Pokeballs.
  • Where does all that money come from? Pokemon battling.
  • Also, if the person playing the game is female, the character could easily be Leaf.
  • This may also explain why Red was on top of Mt. Silver in the Johto games- he lost big in a game and fled to the mountains to avoid having to pay out.
  • Jossed: As with the "Player is Gordon Freeman" theory, Word of God confirms that The Player is You.

The "Murder at the Inventory" will be a Point-And-Click game.
Or at least be similar.
  • Provided the sequel IS "Murder at the Inventory".
    • Whatever the sequel is (and Telltale have stated that they DO want to continue the series), we won't be seeing it for awhile. With several different licensed game properties on Telltale's plate, they'll be busy until at least the end of 2011. *sigh*
    • Well, as of Poker Night at The Inventory 2 screenshots being released, this is practically jossed.
      • Not necessarily; who said there's only gonna be ONE sequel? Did Telltale say that? Anyway, this is Wild Mass Guessing; anything goes!

Sequels won't be card games.
Look at the table you're playing on. It has a backgammon set on it, as well as hexagonal tiles. Future titles will involve a whole new cast of characters chasing off the poker set to play an entirely different game.
  • Jossed; see below.

The Sequels will...
Allow you to pick and choose not just which players you get to play with, but also what game as well.
  • Half-confirmed; in Poker Night 2, you still can't play as anyone but yourself, but you CAN play either Texas Hold 'Em or Omaha.

There will be strip poker.
  • But Max is already naked!

The sequel will be about mahjong.
  • Jossed, I'm afraid.

The player is the Pyro, only unmasked.
  • He/She followed the heavy and Engineer to the Inventory, probably change out to more casual ware and joined the game on invite. Then, when Pyro got all the buy-ins, he/she went back to the barracks and asked the engineer to help modify some of the by-ins so that they can be used as weapons.
    • YES. Somebody write this fanfic.
      • Where?
      • Here!
      • Sorry; this theory has been jossed, as explained above.

The game is indeed canon in the Team Fortress 2 universe.
  • Tycho joked about mail-ordering in Heavy's sister. In Meet The Director, we find out he actually has several sisters. In one quote Tycho asks Heavy if Medic is his friend, and he says yes, and he doesn't take kindly to Spies impersonating him. In Meet The Medic, Medic addresses Heavy as "my friend". Their mutual love of birds might have been what drew Heavy and Medic to become bros in the first place. They also both tell morbid stories they laugh heartily at, and wield the only canonically-first weapons in the game.
    • Furthermore, in Meet the Director, we discover that apparently Heavy was sent to a gulag in Siberia with his family as a child, and it's implied (though he declines to comment) that he participated in a mass escape/arson in which guards were tortured to death. This makes things like the Engineer story and the comments about being sent to his death/work camps/etc. Harsher in Hindsight.
    • I kill many soldiers, and I am asked to join RED Team. That confirms it for me. Only we've run into a snag here. Heavy's father was a counter-revolutionary, meaning he fought against the Communists, right? So why does he have a hat and minigun with a hammer and sickle on it? Maybe they realized his power, and forced him to work for them, or he'd end up like his father. Brrr. Either that, or it's a "love the country, hate the government" kind of thing.
      • Well, the Heavy does charge half a million dollars for assassinations, so he's clearly not that dedicated to the whole communism thing.
    • Strong Bad at one point calls the Heavy "Ivan".

Tycho is actually the BLU Spy.
  • The BLU Engineer killed the entire RED team, and after Heavy killed him, BLU Spy took on Tycho's identity to avenge Engie and murder RED Heavy. Also, how else could he have an invisibility watch?
    • Nice thought, but it's not an invisibility watch: It's a Pac-Man one.
    • Technically, it is an invisibility watch- just not when Tycho or Gabe have it (as far as we know). In Team Fortress 2, it functions as a reskinned version of Spy's default watch.

In the sequel (Murder at the Inventory), the murder victim (or the killer!) will be one of the original characters' partners.
  • Think about it! Each character in Poker Night (besides the Player, of course) is one-half of a partnership (and at least half of them are one-half of a Fan-Preferred Couple). That can't be a coincidence, can it? Thus, the sequel will be a murder mystery starring Gabe, Sam, Homestar (or the Cheat), and Medic, either being killed or straight-up murdering someone.
    • Alternatively, the murder victim will be someone completely different (perhaps the Player from the first game). The first four are ready to solve the mystery when suddenly— the killer's trapped them in the Inventory! They manage to get a phone call out before the killer cuts the lines, probably to Sam. A few calls later and it's Sam, Gabe, Homestar (or Cheat), and Medic, plus a new Player, to the rescue! Or at least the attempted rescue!
      • If you look very closely during the game's opening cutscene, you can see that Sam is actually at The Inventory. It makes sense, seeing as how he doesn't let Max drive the Desoto.

The Player is The User
He just decided to take a break from playing a bunch of computer games to play real card games. Maybe he learned how to play from another computer Texas Hold 'Em game.

This game takes place in the Wreck-It Ralph universe
  • ^ This actually makes sense, considering that both Heavy and Ralph are in Sonic and All-Stars Racing Transformed.
    • Yeah, but good luck getting Disney and/or Pixar to allow Ralph (or any of their family-friendly characters) to be used in a gambling game.

Expanding on that, the "Inventory" is located in your Steam account
What do the characters do when you're not playing their game? Whatever they want! They mingle with other games, do a little shopping, or even work to protect your computer from viruses! Due to a programming error, the Inventory is the only location in "Steam City" which can be seen by an outsider like the player. One night, the fifth member of the Nightly poker tournament couldn't show up, so they decided to invite the player to fill in the 5th spot. Tweak a few codes and now it's a brand new game!

There's a pattern to the player's personalities.
There are four personalities around the table: the bantering casual player (Sam and Max), the jerk who thinks they can win every hand (Strong Bad and Claptrap), the intimidating (Heavy and Brock), and the most down-to-earth at the table (Tycho and Ash; note that even they aren't "normal"). Of course, in Poker Night 2, they kinda mix things up a bit; for example, though intimidating, Brock is still pretty down-to-earth. Note that this troper could be wrong, so feel free to correct me.
  • Actually, it seems that a couple of the characters in Poker Night 2 mix different aspects of those of the first game. Brock is the poker expert at the table, in comparison to Tycho being the smartest one at the table in the previous game, and Mr. Samson's intimidating like the Heavy. Sam sometimes admits that he doesn't really know what he's doing, which places him with his little buddy, but like Tycho was in the last game, he's the quietest one at the table.

The "Murder at the Inventory" set of voice clips was going to be a sequence about the Player's death.
Think about it; the image of Heavy shooting up the Poker Table with his minigun has been advertised, and in the game's sound files (not VOICE files), one can find the sounds of the minigun actually firing, even though the Heavy never got a chance to shoot anything in-game. What if the Player was going to die at the Heavy's hands after winning everything in the game? This troper imagines the dialogue having gone like this (using the game's voice files, of course):
Winslow: (addressing the Player) Congratulations, you are truly a world class cardsman with an icy stare! You have managed to best each of your opponents. This is—
Winslow: Oh no.
The Heavy overturns the table.
Winslow: Back, stand back!
Everyone runs away, with Winslow uttering an "Excuse me". The Heavy takes up Sasha and aims at the player.
Heavy: YAAAAAAH! fires upon the Player, killing him
After the Heavy stops, the other poker players and Winslow come up and look over the body.
Winslow: It appears there has been a MURRRDER!
Max: Remember kids, crime is an invitation to the crypt!
Winslow: Just goes to show that ANYTHING can the INVENTORY!
Max: Uh, you know there's an actual dead guy here, right?

The (next) sequel will be on a "Lady's Night".
As in, all the other players are ladies. As for who could be in the game...
  • Lara Croft from Tomb Raider.
  • Harley Quinn from Batman.
  • Clementine from The Walking Dead.
    • Why would someone as young and innocent as Clementine be gambling? Let's not forget that she's, like, 8 years old or something.
      • Wrong. She's nine. Her birthday was six days ago.
      • That's beside the point. The point is, she's underage.
      • Most likely the Clem we play with in Season 2.
  • Lana Kane from Archer.
  • Helen/The Administrator from Team Fortress 2. Or her assistant Miss Pauling.
  • Carmen Sandiego.
  • Revy from Black Lagoon.
  • Etna from the Disgea series.
  • One of the female trolls from Homestuck.
  • Elsa from Frozen.
  • Haruhi Suzumiya. She's the kind of person who would use a fake ID to get in.
  • Morinth from Mass Effect 2, with Power Nullifier drugs administered and with a Forta sculpture for a bounty.

The BLU engineer in the Heavy's story was not crying for mother...
...but recognizing his mother come to usher him into the afterlife.

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