The Biggest Movie of All Time in 3D

Bingo. Now who can get them to do it?

20th Century Fox. Their parent company believes they can turn anything into gold.

I was gonna suggest child porn, but that's good too

BOTH

Wait, check out this bit from the Take That, Critics!! page

"Meet The Spartans has one of the most spectacularly backfiring examples in history: they build up the gag, by having characters read unflattering reviews of the previous installment, Epic Movie, off the Internet in a mocking tone of voice... but forget to put in the punchline."
THEY KNOW

Oh well. So they'll keep making these movies until people stop paying to see them.

Thus far the only S&F movie I've seen is Spy Hard. Leslie Nielsen does not a watchable film make, despite what people say.

Only ever saw 'Epic Movie' and only because it was part of Bad Movie Beatdown.

I've seen Vampires Suck

I stopped watching their films after Epic Movie. Have they unironically gotten ANY better at their craft? Like, even the tiniest little bit in the most insignificant of categories? Or have they just gotten worse over the years?

Worse.

So lemme get this straight - from a quick look at the IMDB page, their objective this time is to basically "parody" ALL the movies?

Gee, how could such a fullproof plan POSSIBLY lead to another unfunny, incoherent, souless mess populated with tasteless and hideously out-of-date pop culture "jokes" that only people with a liking of injecting Absinthe into their eyes would find relatively enjoyable?

its "foolproof"

No, it's doomed to failure.

Hey everybody! I got a great idea! Let's have a whole bunch of people dress up like every single character from every single film ever! Then! We file them up in a loooooooooooooong ass line towards a crotch kicking machine set up on a stage! Every person whose turn is next must state which character s/he is, from what movie. The whole process would go like this:

Charles Foster Kane: Hi, I'm Charles Foster Kane... From Citizen Kane! We wind up the crank, and the stick with the boot on it kicks Charles Foster Kane in the nuts

Charles Foster Kane: OOOOOMMMMMPH! Makes silly face

Us: AHAHAHAHA! WE JUST PARODIED CITIZEN KANE!!! GET IT?! NEXT!!! Next movie character steps up to get crotch kicked.

We film the entire process until every movie character gets kicked in the crotch. We'll call it... MOVIE MOVIE!!!

In addition to that, we'll have somebody suddenly pop up every 5 minutes to say: "HEY! DID YOU GUYS KNOW YOU'RE WATCHING MOVIE MOVIE!!!?!" Then drop a cow on him... Every single time he comes up to say that. Then, we have everybody sing at the end

Our tagline will be "No set up. No punchline. No irony. NO MERCY!!! This Summer, we'll bust every blockbuster's blocks!"

What do you think? I think the audiences will eat up! We'll make so much money!!!

Of course the anti lulz might be high with this movie... So much anti-lulz, it will disfigure the viewers with a perpetual frown! And if you remembered your LULZ lessons, it is greater crime to do something for the anti lulz than the lulz. But then again, while telling a bad joke, may give the recipient anti-lulz, but will give the person telling an equal amount of lulz. So we can just say "WE DID IT FOR THE LULZ!" and not have to feel remorse for it.

It will definitely be the parody movie to end all parody movies.

MOVIE MOVIE!!!

edited 21st Jul '11 11:44:23 PM by Chickenzhit

Wow. First those two animated Titanic mockbusters, and now a mockbuster of an unfunny comedy series that was already some what of an unfunny mockbuster in a weird way.

Is somebody putting something in the water reservoirs of Italy?

I bet it's the same shadowy lulz killing cabal that shut down Encyclopedia Dramatica! Watch your back!

No. If anything, don't put another dollar in their pockets. The last thing we want to do is give them money.

Tweedly, you hit the nail on the hammer! If anything, Friedberg and Seltzer are trend chasers who never knew a coattail they didn't ride on to the bank. Even since Spy Hard, they were already following a path made by the Naked Gun films.

Scream was popular, and thus, the Scary Movie series was born.

Date Movie "parodied" Kill Bill, Star Wars, and Napoleon Dynamite... Just because those were popular at the time. It did not really satirize the "Romance genre" because, well, those weren't that popular actually.

Epic Movie, just featured references to movies that were either fantasy epics, or just high grossing movies. Again, trends, popularity.

Meet The Spartans came about all because of the "THIS! IS! SPARTAAAAAAAA!" quote in 300 that became popular because it was just so funny at the time. As noted, this was where the series started referencing internet culture, because the cultural imageboard and forum memes started making an impact in real life. Again, popularity.

Disaster movie didn't really reference actual disaster films so much as the films people were going to see. It was less about "The Day After Tomorrow", or "Cloverfield" and more about "Hannah Montana/Chipmunks/Juno/Popular Superhero films/ anything people were talking about".

Vampires Suck, was made and pimped up to sucker in the more stupider section of the Twilight hatedom. Because hating Twilight is popular.

Whether you liked Avatar, or not, cliche and breathtaking as it was, suffice to say, it was influential and has gone on to set the trend of real stereoscopic 3D. And now we have this movie.

Here's the plan: If we want to stop Friedberg & Seltzer, we have to make them do themselves in. After all, it doesn't matter how many bad reviews they get, they always find and suck up to another producer.

Simple. Make uber serious War films popular. Watch holocaust films and such to get movie makers to think that audiences are too disillusioned with fantasy to take it seriously anymore, and are more willing to sit through tragic real life stories of genocide and famine. It will not be a "fun" half of the decade, but when Friedberg & Seltzer see this latest trend, they will ignore their nature and will have no choice but go on to make a horrible spoof of these films.

Such a film will have DUDE NOT FUNNY! all over it. It would disgust even their own producers and any potential producers to the point where no one will touch with them with a ten foot pole and BAM! Instant unemployment for Friedberg & Seltzer.

So remember, after this film... No superhero films, no romantic comedies, no 80's merchandise remakes, certainly no children's films, and definitely no fantasy. Just war films. Brutal, soul crushingly sad war films.

You know, like Grave of the Fireflies, and Schiendler's List, and Saving Private Ryan. Those kind. See what you can do. If there are no war films or films about genocide in the movie theater, then don't go to theater. Don't buy a ticket.

In fact, put all fictional type movies into a ghetto if you must. Make fun of people who watch fantasy films and comedy films. Call them naive. Put them down. Say something to them like "Oh, you just don't want to face reality. You just wanna watch chipmunks flying at you in 3D because you don't want to think about poor one armed child who is starving and dying of AIDS in Africa. Stupid, self absorbed pig. Typical product of the souless western culture."

Then, when Firedberg & Seltzer are out of work, enjoy your fantasy movies again!

Please don't triple-post.

Is it bad that I ignored every one of his posts?

Guys, we need to start a massive pirating and bootlegging initiative. We need to make these movies unprofitable. We need thousands of pirated copies on every single fileshare site and torrent site. We need to constantly upload it to youtube. We need to deny every single cent these motherfuckers might receive otherwise.

I'm with this guy. Though it might land me in jail.

I think my "make war films popular" idea is better.

I support the war film idea!

We still need a plan B in case my plan of tricking them into showing Child Bestiality in theaters nationwide don't work.

edited 22nd Jul '11 11:23:59 AM by TweedlyDee

The problem with the war films idea is that it requires a hell of a lot of communication. With my "make-it-unprofitable" idea, you would only need a small-but-dedicated group of pirates.

Oh, I think I know where we can find some of those.

However, my scheme could backfire. They might think, "OH MY GOD LOOK AT HOW MUCH PEOPLE ARE PIRATING OUR MOVIE THEY MUST LOVE IT WE MUST MAKE MORE OH MY GOD. WHOA!"