Note: This article contains references to both the Legends EU and the current EU under Disney.
Seek my presence, you have.
(For full effect, read in the voice of Frank Oz or Tom Kane)
Welcome, reader.
Yoda my name is. A Jedi Master I am, for my ally is the Force, and a powerful ally it is. For hundreds of years I have trained Jedi to master the Force. For knowledge and defense only, never for attack, as protectors and ambassadors of the Galactic Republic we are.
Some of my Jedi students fell to the Dark Side of the Force — quicker, easier, more seductive... Anger, fear, aggression... Easily these feelings flow, consume these students they did. Protect the galaxy from the return of the Sith I could not, blinded by their clever scheming I have been.
May the Force be with these tropes:
- Ascended to a Higher Plane of Existence: In death, this I have achieved.
- The Anti-Nihilist: Hard to believe, hm? As I told Whie, though there are times I wonder if the Force has no greater hope for the galaxy, a difference it makes not. Living life to the fullest nonetheless, and relishing in life, that is the true path to the Force, hm?
- Attack Reflector: Deflect Force Lightning, I can.
- Badass Adorable: Cute I have been called. Stop me from defeating Count Dooku and fighting on even terms with Palpatine, it does not.
- Barefoot Sage: Wise, some consider me to be. Wear shoes, I do not.
- Berserk Button: "Baby snatchers" the Jedi are not! Important that Jedi training start in childhood it is!
- Characterization Marches On: Hard to believe it is, that I can actually relax and play around when not so serious. Everywhere else, grim I do seem. When first I appeared, I acted this way to test Luke. Additionally, happy I was to show my looser side to Scout and the others.
- Combat Parkour: My fighting style. Ataru it is called. Necessary it is for me to fight larger opponents.
- The Fundamentalist: Jedi should be trained from childhood, I strongly believe.
- Guest Fighter: In another universe, I arrived. In the page image, you can see.
- Lack of Empathy: Exactly the right phrase, this is not. Dismissive of other's concerns and emotions, people say I am. Because I feel a Jedi must temper their emotions to avoid the dark side, I do this. Very old, I am, and dwell on those I have lost, I cannot.
- Little Green Men: A literal little green man am I. Judge me by my size, do you?
- Martial Pacifist: Only when it is necessary do I fight. Peaceful solutions do I prefer.
- Memetic Mutation/Ron the Death Eater: Depicted as Ketamine-addicted murderous sociopath in parodic ASMR videos, I am. True, these memes are clearly not. Take pleasure in murder or spice, I do not.
- My Greatest Failure: Many regrets, I have.
- Saved young Skywalker, I could have. His fall to the dark side, inevitable was not. True the same is for Dooku.
- Innocent, Ahsoka Tano was. Responsible I am for her loss of faith in the Jedi. Play politics, I should have not.
- Mysterious Past: Detail my past, I will not.
- Nice Job Breaking It, Hero: When an emotional crisis, someone is suffering, only make things worse, platitudes will. Learn this the hard way, I did.
- Obfuscating Dementia: Pretend that gone my mind was, in order to test young Skywalker's patience during our first meeting. Even my identity, I concealed at first.
- Odd Friendship:
- Different from me, Thire, Jek, and Rys were. Less spiritual, more focused on fighting their minds are. But saw their humanity I did. In the heat of battle a close relationship I formed.
- Good relations with the Wookiees, I have. Large and aggressive they seem, but similar we are beneath the skin.
- Old Master: For eight hundred years, have I trained Jedi.
- O.O.C. Is Serious Business: Take me for nothing but a Strange-Syntax Speaker, do you, hmmm? Well, I do not always do that. Because sometimes I need to make myself clear.
- Pint-Sized Powerhouse: Size matters not. Look at me. Once again, judge me by my size, do you? And well you should not. For my ally is the Force. And a powerful ally it is. Besides, typical for my people, this stature is.
- A Pupil of Mine Until He Turned to Evil:
- Count Dooku I trained, until turned to the Dark Side he did.
- Narrowly averted, this was, with my former Padawan Ikrit. Bury his lightsaber after barely stopping himself from murder, he did.
- Really 700 Years Old: Over 900 years old, I am. Long-lived, my species is. 50 years old, an infant is.
- Strange-Syntax Speaker:
- Famous examples of Object-Subject-Verb word order my lines have become. Great debate there is, over whether this trait of mine a subject of Flanderization, has been, for I have often shown that I can speak with "normal" syntax... When choose to I do.
- On your world, written/Five retro-style plays are where/Speak Haiku, I do.
- Trickster Mentor: Wise a Jedi should be to see when I am merely playing. Luke Skywalker was at first unable to figure this out, when first we met, and pretended to be a silly swamp-dweller I did.
- Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny: Fought against a legendary king once, I have. Hold my loss against him, I do not.
- Verbal Tic: "Hmm", I say very often.
Now, gained wisdom, you have. Go forth, but be wary of the Dark Side, you must. May the Force be with you...always.
