Release: February 7, 2017
Film: Garfield: A Tail of Two Kitties
Tagline: The orange hairy fungus is back, and this time he’s looking to drag England into his web of dumb.
This review contains examples of:
- Actor Allusion: With Prince XII (Garfield's lookalike cat) being voiced by Tim Curry, the Critic dubs into his acceptance speech as inheritor to the Carlyle estate lines from Legend (1985), and a scene where he emerges from a storm drain after being thrown out of his castle by Lord Dargis with Pennywise the Dancing Clown's "they float" Catchphrase.
- Adaptation Decay: The Critic, a self-confessed Garfield fan, claims that this film is a huge disservice to the franchise.
- Artistic License – Biology: The Critic thinks CGI Garfield is too Acrofatic by the standards of normally sedentary cats.
- Call-Back: The Critic recalls his joke from his review of the first Garfield movie about how Bill Murray got duped into voicing the titular character after mistaking its screenwriter Joel Cohen (of the heavily-panned Cheaper by the Dozen (2003) infamy) for Joel Coen (one half of the brothers who directed such acclaimed hits as The Big Lebowski).
- This is also the second movie in this Sequel Month under the impression that kids have seen Silence of the Lambs, to the point where The Critic thinks it was a missed opportunity for the filmmakers to reference It when Prince (played by Tim Curry) is the sewer.
- Cardboard Prison: The fact that the Carlyle dungeons have an elaborate escape mechanism operated by animals is deemed so stupid the Critic compares it to Malcolm!Joker threatening to luck up Tamara!Batgirl in a room to be filled with laughing gas, only to leave the door open.
- Contrived Coincidence: The Critic's opinion on the fact that the animal conservation meeting Liz was to speak in just so happens to take place in Carlyle Castle, where Garfield, mistaken for Prince, was taken in.
- Damned by Faint Praise: The Critic has expected a customary fart joke to occur two minutes in, and gives the film small credit for putting it midway through.
- In Name Only: The Critic claims this film continues the first film's tradition of having nothing to do with the original comics, other than the titular character's nominal quirk of love for lasagna.
- Literal Metaphor: The drawing-style opening sequence has the Critic wondering if the entire script, too, was written in crayon (i.e., immaturely).
- Malicious Misnaming: As soon as the tagline, the Critic is already giving CGI Garfield a load of unflattering nicknames.
- Mirror Routine: The Critic thinks that it's funny if it's done by humans, plain-looking if done by animated characters... and is simply creepy with Garfield and Prince.
- Never Trust a Title: The Critic wonders why the film, whose subtitle is a Shout-Out to A Tale of Two Cities, is instead loosely based on The Prince and the Pauper.
- Questionable Casting: As much as the Critic likes Billy Connolly (Lord Dargis), he thinks the producers made him imitate John Cleese's British Stuffiness, probably because they really wanted Cleese into the role but were turned down.
- Schedule Slip: This episode was delayed because of Doug Walker getting the Norovirus.
- Sequelitis: The Critic's final opinion on the film.
- Shout-Out:
- CGI Garfield is compared at the beginning of the review to a hallucination from Pink Floyd's "The Wall" music video.
- Dargis deciding whether to shoot a hare or a goose for sport is dubbed over with Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck's argument over which hunting season is it from Rabbit Fire.
- A skit featuring Garfield and Odie has the Critic wondering why kids' films such as Alvin and the Chipmunks: the Squeakquel have a bizarre Shout-Out to Silence of the Lambs, wondering if it will also have a crossover with The Amazing World of Gumball.
- A Groin Attack scene featuring Rommell (the Carlyle estate's security rottweiler) biting and tearing through Dargis's pants has a revolted Critic thinking Dargis is being castrated, and compares it to a Game of Thrones death.
- Take That!:
- The implausibility of a cat inheriting his owner's estate is compared by NC to Donald Trump getting elected President. NC even throws in a jab at the size of his inauguration crowd when cutting to a shot of the small crowd of farm animals at Prince's "inauguration".
- The Critic wonders if audiences really wanted to see Bill Murray suffer through bad films, showing posters of Larger than Life, Osmosis Jones and The Man Who Knew Too Little.
- Liz Wilson replacing real-life renowned primatologist Jane Goodall for an animal conservation meeting.
NC: Ah, yes. Jane Goodall, Liz the vet. I totally understand this choice! That's like saying, "What? We can't get Rudy Giuliani to open the 9/11 Museum? Well, bring in Paul Blart, mall cop! That's a fitting replacement! We do da smart thing."- When Dargis is aiming at the rabbits: "No, no, only aim for the orange ones with celebrities mumbling swear words under their breath!"
- Took the Bad Film Seriously: The Critic thinks the narrator, Roscoe Lee Browne (who also narrated Babe), is doing too good a job for something as bad as this film.
- Unintentional Uncanny Valley: Invoked case. The Critic finds Prince's (and Garfield's) movements too human-like (yet is still unintelligible to Jon). He complements it with a sketch of Malcolm and Tamara wearing cat ears, whiskers and forelegs.
- Villain Has a Point: The critic feels that Darbis is in the right for wanting to turn the estate into a luxurious spa, seeing it as a much better use for the place than just a very expensive litterbox for a cat.
