"Tch, oh yeah, you wish!"
- Crow: "Susie thinks she doesn't need a seatbelt. Watch Susie go ballistic through the windshield."
Film watched: The Amazing Colossal Man
This episode was one of the first to be released on home video by Rhino in 1996. Its release was shot down by the film's copyright holder Susan Hart. It had no legal re-release since.
The Segments:
Prologue- A rebellious Tom and Crow have constructed a fort out of cardboard, and Joel isn't allowed inside.
Segment 1/Invention Exchange
- Dr. Forrester presents a plant he bred which reviews music, and has a bit of an attitude if you disagree with it. Joel's invention is a Magic Slate-style tattoo, which lets you fix any regrets you might have about the name inside the heart.
Segment 2
- The reporter in the film was incredibly insensitive to Glenn's fiancée about his condition, so Joel asks the 'Bots for ways to fix that. Not only do they not cooperate, the excercise leaks over to Joel's own condition.
Segment 3
- Joel pretends to be the Amazing Colossal Man while Crow and Tom study him. Once again, they don't really cooperate.
Segment 4
- While trying to think of actual thoughtful questions to ask Glenn, the crew are in for a shock when the SOL runs into him. Thankfully, his heart condition halts his angry retaliation.
Segment 5
- Joel and the 'Bots muse over what they would do if they were giants. They try to abide by a fan letter's request to extend the show, but it only adds about four seconds. Dr. Forrester sticks Frank with a giant needle when he likewise drifts into imagining life as a giant.
The Mystery Science Theater 3000 presentation of The Amazing Colossal Man contains examples of:
- Absurd Altitude: Glenn is somehow tall enough to take the orbiting Satellite of Love in the gut, but the only difficulty he seems to be having at that height is with his heart.
- Bad "Bad Acting": Joel as the Fifty Foot Man. "Ah! (weakly punches the ground) No!"
- Breaking Bad News Gently: Joel tries to get the Bots propose better ways for Carol to have been informed about Glenn's grim prognosis. Naturally, what they come up with is even worse.
- Crazy Enough to Work: During the portion of the film where the scientists work out a possible solution to Glenn's condition, Joel dubs over one the the scientists, and acts like the solution is Coco Puffs:Scientist: Paul, I got the answer! I got the answer!Joel: (as the scientist) It's Coco Puffs, Bob, I have no idea why, but it fits the equation! (as the scientist begins constructing a microscope slide) Check it out, there's the skim milk... and then, there's the Coco Puff... and, you see?!
- Failed a Spot Check: As soon as Glenn runs out into the blast zone of the bomb, only to abruptly stop before getting hit, Tom spins this as Glenn managing to briefly forget he ran out into the blast zone.
- Innocently Insensitive: When Joel decides he wants to give up on teaching Crow and Tom how to show sympathy, they state they can be sympathetic towards him. This is how they do so:Crow: Yeah, I mean, think of it, you're stranded in space, you'll never see your family again, and when the orbit on the satellite decays, you'll be burnt to a crisp, but you never hear us talking about that when you're around.Tom Servo: That's right, we're sensitive to the reality of your situation here!
- Tom and Crow proceed to further prove their case by pointing out Joel's unkempt hairnote , his feet smelling like cheesenote , and that they know he would use breath mints if he had themnote .
- Oh, Crap!:Tom Servo: (as Glenn) Oh, hey, FM stereo- Wait a minute, WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING OUT HERE?! (bomb goes off) OOOH!Joel: Well... live and learn.
- Overly Long Gag: The guys bizarrely make the exact same joke three times in a row, regarding make-up being tested on rabbits. Though Crow's rabbit voice on the last one saves it a bit.
- Running Gag: Crow and Servo making insensitive food-related riffs in regard to the burned/disfigured Glenn, and equally insensitive size-related comments after he starts to grow.
- And the Yul Brynner jokes about Glenn's baldness.
- They Wasted a Perfectly Good Plot: During the host segment, the crew state that Glenn could've had a far more fun rampage.
- What the Hell, Hero?: Across two host segments, Joel reads Crow and Tom the riot act for not reacting properly to Glenn's condition, especially in the host segment where Joel plays him, and they're his doctors.
