Quotes: The Farmer and the Viper
"Give not that which is holy unto the dogs, neither cast ye your pearls before swine, lest they trample them under their feet, and turn again and rend you."
"I saved you," cried the woman, "and you bit me, but why? You know your bite is poisonous and now I'm gonna die." "Oh, shut up, silly woman," said the reptile with a grin, "You knew damn well I was a snake before you took me in."
Mikey! I was good to you, Mikey...! Michael Myers:
[Holds his head underwater repeatedly, then tosses him on the floor] Ismael Cruz:
Mikey, please don't, buddy please, I was good to you, please, I'm your friend. Michael Myers:
[Tears a TV off it's hinges, hesitates, then smashes Ismael]
"Seasons change, tastes change... but people? People never change, and you delude yourself believing otherwise..."
The greatest thing the devil ever did was make you people believe he didn't exist...and you're looking at him right now! I AM THE DEVIL HIMSELF! And all of you stupid, mindless people fell for it! You all believed in the same make-believe superhero that the legendary Ricky "The Dragon" Steamboat saw some year ago today. No, you see, you don't know anything. You followed me hook-line and sinker, all of you did, and I'm not mad at you...I just feel sorry for you.
A scorpion was wandering along the bank of the river, wondering how to get to the other side. Suddenly he saw a fox. He asked the fox to take him on his back across the river.
The fox said, "No. If I do that, you'll sting me and I'll drown."
The scorpion assured him, "If I did that, we'd both drown."
So the fox thought about it and finally agreed. So the scorpion climbed up on his back and the fox began to swim. But halfway across the river, the scorpion stung him.
As the poison filled his veins, the fox turned to the scorpion and said, "Why did you do that? Now you'll drown too."
"I couldn't help it," said the scorpion. "It's my nature."
"Brothers, the white people are like poisonous serpents: when chilled they are feeble and harmless, but invigorate them with warmth and they sting their benefactors to death."
"It had all been a ruse. Luthor was evil as ever, and this was his chance of a lifetime. The man had cured cancer, just to lull Superman into a false sense of security. That, my friends, is evil. "
One day the Baron was out a-walking, when by the side of the road, he found two injured constructs.
They possessed the faces and torsos of beautiful women, and the bodies of deadly serpents.
"Help us, kind sir," the creatures begged.
"Of course," said the Baron. He took them to his castle, and patiently nursed them back to health.
And when they were both once again sleek and strong, the first one bit him with her deadly, poisonous fangs.
"Why did you do that?" screamed the second construct. "He helped us!"
The first construct shrugged. "He shouldn't be surprised. He knew we were monsters when he took us in."
"But we don't have to act like monsters," said the second. "I have chosen not to!"
"And that," said the Baron to the second construct as he revealed the armor beneath his clothing and drew forth his terrible sword, "Is why you will live."