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Quotes / Elves Versus Dwarves

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    Pro-dwarf 
"ALRIGHT, LISTEN TO ME YOU KNIFE-EARED PIECE OF SHIT! IF YOU GO ANY FURTHER WITH YOUR PISS-STAINED PUBIC HAIR YOU CALL A WIG, I'M GONNA WRECK YOUR SHIT SO HARD THAT YOU WON'T EVEN BE ABLE TO WALK WITH YOUR LIMP DICK! I'M GONNA SHOVE MY FOOT SO FAR UP YOUR SHAVEN PERFECT LITTLE ASS THAT YOUR BREATH IS GONNA SMELL LIKE SHOE POLISH! THEN I'M GONNA TAKE THAT LITTLE RED ANAL BEAD ON YOUR BELT AND PUSH IT IN YOUR FACE! I'M GONNA FLAGELLATE YOU WITH MY FUCKIN' BEARD! I'M GONNA BUILD YOU A PAIR OF RUNIC MECHANICAL BALLS AND USE SURGICAL PRECISION TO SEW THEM TO YOUR GROIN WHERE YOUR MANHOOD OUGHT TO BE JUST SO THAT I CAN KICK 'EM WITH MY IRON FUCKING FEET, YOU TWAT!"
Urist the Dwarf insulting Ravandil the Elf, Ravandil's Quest

"I KNEW YOU ELVES HAD NO HONOR! NO RESPECT! NO BEER!"
Urist the Dwarf when Ravandil the Elf deeply insults him note , Ravandil's Quest

"ALRIGHT, LISTEN TO ME YOU POLE-PROPORTIONED DENDROPHILES! IF YOU TRY ANYTHING NASTY WITH THE BITCHBOY OVER HERE, I'M GONNA TAKE YOUR FUCKIN' ARROWS, AND SHOVE THEM IN BETWEEN YER POLISHED FINGERNAILS! I'M GONNA TAKE THAT BOWSTRING OF YOURS AND STRING YOU UP BY YOUR FUCKIN' FORESKIN UNTIL GRAVITY GIVES YOU A BOTCHED CIRCUMCISION, AND PLAY IT LIKE A FUCKIN' VIOLIN! I'M GONNA HEADBUTT YOU UNTIL THERE IS NOTHING BUT A BUTT LEFT! I'M GONNA COLOR THAT LITTLE PANSY GREEN SKIRT RED USIN' YER FUCKIN' BONE MARROW! YOU BETTER BELIEVE YOU'RE GOING TO WISH THAT YOU WERE NEVER BORN, 'CAUSE I'LL MAKE IT SEEM LIKE YOU NEVER WERE, YE ATROCIOUS FUCKIN' BOIL ON THE FACE OF REALITY! I WILL--" *Scene cuts*
Urist the Dwarf insulting Bitchworth the Elf, Ravandil's Quest 2: The Second One

"LISTEN HERE YA SPIKE-COCKED, TAR-EYED, PLANK-SHAPED, SEWER-ASSED RODENT ANALOGUES! I'M GONNA SHEAR THAT THIN FILM OF SLIME YOU CALL SKIN FROM YER SPINDLY HUSK AND MAKE A FUCKING RAINCOAT OUT OF IT! I'M GONNA SLAM MY FIST DOWN YER THROATS, RIP YER INKY INNARDS OUT AND STITCH A LEATHERY SACK OUT OF EM! I'M GONNA SAW YER WEE LEGS OFF AND TURN YOUR HOLLOW LEGBONES INTO FUCKING FLUTES! I'M GONNA CRAFT A MAKESHIFT PIPE BAG OUT OF THE RANCID MATERIALS I HAVE HARVESTED FROM YER TWITCHING BODIES, AND THEN I'M GONNA COME AROUND AND PLAY A NICE TUNE AT YER FUNERAL CEREMONIES, BEFORE I PISS ON YER FUCKING GRANDMA!"
Urist the Dwarf insulting a group of Dark Eldar, Russ plays a Small Baby Game with the Dark Eldar

The chains snapped, and the man slumped forward but recovered himself so that he did not fall. A moment later he reached down and picked up his sword. As soon as it was in his fist, he stood taller and straighter, and seemed ready for action.
“I am grateful for the rescue,” he said. “Have you found an ally or is this another daemon of this foul place?”
“Worse than that, manling,” said Gotrek Gurnisson. “It’s an elf.”

OP: why come Dwarf is good at using axes? I thought Dwarf burrowed under the ground and built kingdoms and live. For them, the hammer to break the stone is a reasonable object, but the axe to cut down the tree doesn't seem to be very reasonable for them. Shouldn't they be able to handle pickaxes instead of axes? Why are they good at handling axes?
Reply: Elves live in trees.
This Reddit thread

"Dwarves just love making elves suffer."
— OP in Elfslayer Chronicles, on the party's dwarves messing with an elven investigation.

"C'mon you fat lards, are we elves or dwarves?"
Driller, Deep Rock Galactic

    Both sides/commentary 
Zevran: "Hello, my stocky little friend!"
Zevran: "Ah. This is where we begin the typical dwarven/elven rivalry, is it?"
Violet: "How in all hells did that thing sneak up on us?! You're the one with the elven eyes! Elven! Eyes!"
Hannah: "Don't pull that shit on me! My mother is near sighted and I'm just a product of familial traits! I suppose you just love dwarven ale... Because you're a dwarf!"
Violet: "You know I only drink wine! And do you seriously think my people only brew one kind of beer and then, with the creative imagination of a donkey's cock, name it dwarven?!"
Hannah: "Well, I only know one dwarf who drinks wine as a matter of principle. And it's really godsdamned obnoxious, you know that?"

"When the Chimer first abandoned the herds and tents of their nomadic ancestors, and built the first Great Houses, we loved the Daedra, and worshipped them as gods. But our brethren, the Dwemer, scorned the Daedra, and mocked our foolish rituals, and preferred instead their gods of Reason and Logic. So the Chimer and Dwemer were always at bitter war, until the Nords came and invaded Resdayn. Only then did the Chimer and Dwemer put away their strife and join together to cast out the invaders."
Vivec, The Battle of Red Mountain, and the Rise and Fall of the Tribunal, The Elder Scrolls

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