Not Under the Parents' Roof

Mr. Oshiro: You shall refrain from touching my daughter within this house.
Nick: (thinks) Note to self: no PDAs, and I don't mean my Palm...

— General Protection Fault

Children grow up. It seems as if it was yesterday when they were starting to walk. But at some point, more sooner than later, things get messy. First, parents try to get away with the Delivery Stork fable. Then, with a Sexual Euphemism or two. Finally, they'll have to do The Talk. The kids have access to internet, and we all know what that means. And eventually, they will either fall in love or become The Casanova. And that means, finally, to have some real action! But where? At home? In their room?

No!

Some parents may be open to everything before, but this is the line in the sand where they place a limit. "Not under my roof!" They may even be accepting of their kids having sex, just... not at home. Not a few meters and a thin wall away from them. Alternatively, a Boyfriend-Blocking Dad is angry about his kid having sex, and doing it at home is an aggravating factor.

This mindset is likely a consequence of the time when everyone was expected to stay virgins until marriage. You get married, you move to a house of your own, and then have your first sex. Of course, the kids that get into this problem do not want to wait that long.

So what to do, then? Love Hotels are a good option, and if you get creative, go Making Love in All the Wrong Places. Waiting for both parents to leave the house is another, but this usually leads to a Home-Early Surprise.

Usually happens when Parents Walk In at the Worst Time. Contrast Parental Sexuality Squick, where it's the kids who don't like the idea of their parents having sex.

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Examples

Comic Books

• Ultimate Spider-Man: Aunt May has a strict rule of "No hanky-panty in this house". Never. She has no problem with Peter dating Mary Jane or Kitty Pryde, just don't do that thing at her home. This rule also applies to Gwen Stacy, Johnny Storm, Robert Drake, and any other teenager that moves, permanently or temporarily, to her house.

Fan Works

• Ultimate Secret Wars: This fanfic is based on Secret Wars (2015), but from the perspective of the Ultimate Marvel universe. Bombshell and Ganke want to have a "last sex before the apocalypse" with Miles Morales and Gwen Stacy, but aunt May put a halt to it. "There will be no hanky-panty in this house. Not even in the face of Armageddon."
• The My-HiME fanfic, Windows of the Soul has Mikoto state:
  "Ani said it is irresponsible to sleep with a daughter in the house of a mother," Mikoto remarked. "So he probably won't."
  • Later, after Natsuki kisses Shizuru in her father's study, Natsuki starts wondering if it might be sage advice, since the elder Fujino owns genuine katana and is quite versed in using them, and she already knows she's not on his list of favorite people without the knowledge that she's romantically involved with his daughter.
• Don't Tell Your Mother is a Simpsons fanfic about Superintendent Chalmers arriving at Principal Skinner's house for some peace, quiet, and "sexy time"... however, they have to be careful of Seymour's mother Agnes, and be extremely quiet so as not to wake her up and let her know that her son has been having sex underneath her roof.

Film — Live-Action

• Meet the Parents: Greg and his fiancee Pam are staying with her parents, Jack and Dina. After a disastrous first day, they are just about to have sex in her room, only to be interrupted when Jack and Dina knock at the door. They're there to say not to worry about the events of the day... and to inform Greg that he will be sleeping downstairs in the den. As Dina is leaving, Jack casually informs Greg that while he realizes the two of them have probably had "premarital relations", while they're under his roof, it's his way or the Long Island Expressway.
• In The Prince & Me Paige takes the (incognito) Prince of Denmark home from college to the Midwest for Thanksgiving. Her father says the guest room is down the hall from Paige's, right across from theirs — and they sleep with the door open.
• In The Family Stone, it's the fiancée herself who invoked this, not being comfortable with the idea and feeling that it's disrespectful to his parents. Sure enough, when the guy tells his mother that she insists on having her own room, his mother laughs her head off about it, because she had absolutely no problem with it. Sadly, the young woman's efforts to curry favor with her future mother-in-law have ended up making her look ridiculously uptight and even worse in the woman's eyes.

Live-Action TV

• Modern Family:
  • Dylan has nowhere to go, so the Dunphys allowed him to stay in their home. But not in Haley's room! If he stays, it will be in Alex's room, as she's in university now. That night, Alex comes home without calling, very sad and with a crisis, jumps to her bed... and there's a stranger in it! After the explanations, she bursts into tears, with Phil and Claire hugging her. And Dylan tries to join. Phil orders him to go to Haley's room.
  • Luke finally had his first time. Phil comically ignored all the clues about it, until he's forced to face it. He shouts a lot of angry things to him: "Under my roof!" "In the bed I bought you!" "In front of the photo of your grandpa!". But he admitted to the docudrama camera that he was saying nonsense and had no reason to be angry. He was just sad because Luke was growing up so quickly.
• Graduados: Loli finds women's private clothing at Martin's room, and berates him because of it. Andy (his biological parent) says to leave him alone, that having sex is a normal thing and he does not understand which is the big deal, and Pablo (his adoptive parent) praises him for being a winner with the ladies. Nobody seems to acknowledge that he keeps saying that he had no sex and does not know how did those clothes ended up in there.
• Muñeca Brava: The Di Carlo family are a powerful and conservative family... at, least, the adults. They usually enforce strict rules, such as this one. Fortunately for the younger Ivo, as the family is so rich, he has an apartment that he uses specifically for dates and have sex.
• In The Inbetweeners, Simon's parents insist that he keep the door open when he has a girl in his room to keep anything from happening, much to his annoyance. When Simon and Tara decide to have sex, neither of them can do it at their own house. Simon proposes doing it in the bushes in his garden (immediately shot down by Tara), and they end up with a convoluted plan to do with while visiting Tara's sister at university.
• Home and Away tends to zig-zag this a lot, often with the same characters: Long-runners Alf and Irene are spectacularly inconsistent as to whether they let the teens that live with them have sex under their roof or not. One of the most extreme cases was when Sasha was living with Irene and dating Matt: It wasn't even close to being her first time but Irene refused to let him stay over, resulting in a lot of sneaking him into dorm rooms and doing it in the closed Diner.
• Subverted in Everything's Gonna Be Okay, where Darren is nonplussed at the thought of his son Nicholas having sex with his boyfriend while staying in the guest house. Also subverted in the episode "Maggots", where Nicholas, having become the legal guardian for his two younger half-sisters, agrees to let Matilda host a threesome at their house. Granted, in the latter case, it's not entirely clear that any sex occurs, as one of Matilda's would-be partners, Jeremy, flees after realizing that he'd have to undress, and the other, Drea, seems to be happy with just kissing.
• In American Housewife, Katie and Greg admonish their oldest daughter Taylor, now 19 years old and in college, to start acting her age. She obliges this by inviting her also-19-year-old boyfriend Trip to start spending nights in her bedroom, and it's made clear the two are sleeping together. Katie is furious and Greg is only slightly less angry, but Katie's friend Doris convinces her that overreacting will only push Taylor away in the future and, for better or worse, Taylor is now a grown woman and there's nothing wrong with her wanting to be intimate with her long-term boyfriend. However when Katie and Greg overcompensate by providing the couple with a gift basket full of sex toys, Taylor and Trip are so weirded out that they decide to stop having sex in the house.
• Floricienta: Sofía and Bata have been together for some time, and want to take their relation to the next step and live in the same house. Titi, Bata's mom, refuses: not unless they get married. So they move to the Fritzenwalden house, where Sofía lives. Malala does not like it either (in her case, because she despises all poor people), but they later got this reaction from Sofía's grandmother.
• Parodied in the Saturday Night Live skit "Let's Do It In My Twin Bed". Though it's more about the kinkiness of two adults having sex in a kid's bed, there's also the possible role-playing as two kids sneaking around behind their parents backs—one woman explicitly tells her boyfriend to hurry up before her mother comes back from the store, while another couple is equally harried trying to keep her mother from barging in because the door doesn't lock.

Visual Novels

• In Double Homework, Rachel’s mom becomes so irate at finding her daughter in bed with the protagonist that she supervises her daughter’s get-togethers with him afterward. This is subverted as the story goes on, as Rachel’s mom seems to accept that it’s natural for teens to have sex; she just asks that they not let Rachel’s little brother catch them in the act or find any “evidence.” No

Webcomics

• In General Protection Fault, after Nick caresses his girlfriend Ki's cheek and she kisses him over breakfast at Ki's parents' house, Ki's father shows up and sternly tells Nick not to touch Ki while under his roof. Nick nervously makes a mental note not to engage in PDAs, while Ki glares at her father.

Websites

• Not Always Right has multiple stories with an over-restrictive parent. Sometimes they get their just deserts.

Western Animation

• King of the Hill: A variant in "Edu-macating Lucky" has Luanne, Hank's niece, announce that she's pregnant with Lucky's child, and Hank angrily asks if they did this at the house.
  Dale: Hey, maybe they'll name the baby "Dennis" after where he was conceived: Your den!
  Hank: Shut up, Dale!

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