Funny / The Kane Chronicles

In General

  • Like in Percy Jackson and the Olympians by the same author, the chapter titles often only make sense in context. But they're nearly always hilarious out of it.
    • Highlights from ToF: "We tame a Seven-Thousand-Pound Hummingbird", "The Ice Cream Man Plots Our Death", "The Revenge of Bullwinkle the Moose God", and "We Visit the House of the Helpful Hippo".
      • How about "Camels Are Evil..." and "...But Not As Evil As Romans"
      • "Major Delays at Waterloo Station (We Apologise for the Giant Baboon)"
      • "Men Asking For Directions and Other Signs of the Apocalypse"
  • Carter and Sadie squabbling over the mic, and the occasional mention of what's going on while they're recording. Doubly funny if you're listening to the audiobook version.
  • Anything involving this phrase: "The five elements are fire, air, earth, water, and cheese"

The Red Pyramid

  • "Somebody get a can opener, I've got a god stuck in my head!
  • "You got your head cut off?" "I got better."
  • How does Bast justify stealing a car?
    Bast: My dear, I am a cat. Everything I see is mine.
  • This one appeals to myth experts: Anubis threatens Sadie with the still-to-be-invented mouth closer ritual.
  • Carter and Sadie come face to face with the Rosetta Stone.
    Carter: The Rosetta Stone.
    Sadie: Isn't that a computer program?
  • Sadie getting Shezmu's secret name.
    Sadie: And so your friends call you what... Shezzy? Bloodsiekins?
    Shezmu: I have no friends! But if I did they would call me Slaughterer of Souls, Fierce of Face! But I don't have any friends, so my name is not in danger! Ha ha ha!
    Shezmu: GAAAAHHHH! How do they always know?

The Throne of Fire

  • "Oh noes, vegetables!"
    • Said by king-of-all-gods Ra, no less.
  • One word: Penguins.
    • "Penguin in the fireplace if anyone's interested."
    • Expanding on that, anything Felix does or says is funny to some degree.
    Felix: Yes! I found my path. I'm supposed to follow the god of ice!
    Carter: There's a god of ice? Egypt is a desert. Who's the ice god?
    Felix: I have no idea!
  • Camels are evil...
  • Ptah explaining how words can get him into trouble.
    Ptah: "Once, just for fun, I made up the word platypus and..." instantly a duck billed furry thing appeared on the floor scrabbling around in a panic "Oh dear, yes that's exactly what happened."
  • Set's introduction in Throne of Fire. Apparently, he likes the name "Rockin' Red Reaper" better than "Evil Day". Then again who wouldn't?
  • In the audiobook version, Carter's "I don't think I could've been more surprised if Bes had said 'By the way, you're leaning against a hydrogen bomb'" because the latter is said in Bes's voice.
  • The graphic novel is worth a look just to see Bes and his "ugly outfit."

The Serpent's Shadow

  • Shelby is both adorable and hilarious beating the enemy magicians on the butt with her wand and chanting 'Die, die'.
  • The interactions between Drew and Sadie are this and awesome.
  • "Sadie, please do not call the Destroyer of Souls 'poochiekins'."
  • The return of Hindenburg the camel. "If you're confused think how the criosphynx felt."
  • The chapter where Amos/Set is fighting with Sarah Jacobi. Sadie rushes in to help her uncle, only to be nearly killed by Jacobi, and then Walt/Anubis steps in and takes care of her. The words exchanged between Set and Anubis is just lulzy:
    Set: "That's my boy!"
    Anubis: "Shut up, Father."
  • Carter's narration about Sadie's attempts in crafting magical statues:
    My sister had no talent for crafting magical statues. That didn't stop her from trying. She'd gotten this harebrained idea that she could create the perfect shabti to be her avatar, speak with her voice, and do all her chores like a remote-controlled robot. All her previous attempts had exploded or gone haywire, terrorizing Khufu and the initiates. Last week she'd created a magical Thermos with googly eyes that levitated around the room, yelling, “EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!” until it smacked me in the head.
    • That one could not be a more obvious Shout-Out to Doctor Who...
    • Clearly Sadie is a huge fan, because who else could she be channeling when she tricks the goddess Neith into believing in a jelly baby conspiracy in a display of rapid fire stories half-remembered from a past encounter with her grandfather's veteran friend in the spur of a moment, while deviously scribbling down the glyph for a protection barrier as the sun slowly set towards their victory?