- Dexter trying (and failing miserably) to make a Mondo Burger.
Griffin: Bun! Patty! Toppings! Sauce! Assemble!
- Ed trying to fix the milkshake machine.
Ed: Strawberry Jacuzzi!
- The first meeting between Ed and Dexter, who was trying to remember where he's seen Ed before.
Dexter: I could've sworn I've seen you somewhere before.
Ed: Maybe I'm someone famous like a baseball player or a pretty nurse!
What are you talking about!?
Ed: Okay, I give up. Who am I?
Dexter: I don't know who you are or where I've seen you before or why you think you're an attractive nurse!
- Ed's first encounter with Kurt.
Dexter: Check it, Ed, it's the Mondo Idiot!
Ed: Oh, nice to meet you, Mondo Idiot, I'm Ed.
Kurt: Well, Ed, you better watch your butt, man!
(Tries and ends up spinning around and around)
Ed: I give up. There's no way a guy can watch his own butt.
- Ed in general.
- "Is it because I'm black?"
- Nearly everything by Abe Vigoda's character, Otis.
: I need a hot Jacuzzi
! *passes out*
Troy: Who are you?
: Could someone get me to a hospital? I think I broke my ass.
Heather: They're coming! We'd better hurry!
Otis: Don't have to tell me twice. *Supermans out window*
- The Connie Muldoon sequence.
- Dexter tries to play cards with three patients. But one of them keeps eating the cards, one keeps hitting his head with a ping pong paddle, and one keeps poking at Dexter.
- "It's okay, people! HER BUTT...IS FINE!!!"
- "Look! I'm Grape Nose Boy!"
- "I hate to do this, I hate to put a black man in jail!"
- The "Chariots of Fire" music playing during the slow-motion scene of Dexter and Ed running towards Shaq and hugging him.
- When Troy and Griffen tear off Ed and Dexter's old lady disguises - and Ed is wearing lingerie underneath his.
- When Ed, Dexter and Otis escape from Demented Hills, they decide to take an ice cream truck. Then comes all the flinging of various ice cream at the windshield to the point that it's become too thick to see out.
- The scene where Ed pours the chemical into the meat supply and Mondo Burger becomes "a victim of its own foul play".
- "Kurt's going to jail, Kurt's going to jail, Kurt's going to jail, jail, jail..."
- When Dexter gives Mr. Wheat half the money he owes him for the accident and says, "En-JOY your car!"...just after his recently repaired car was crushed by the giant burger from Mondo Burger's roof.
- When Mr. Bailey asks Dexter how long he's worked in fast food and he replies "Nearly two days!"
- When Ed delivers Shaq's Good Burger.
Shaq: Little man, I ordered tomatoes on this Good Burger, I don't see no tomatoes.
Well, hang on... (Ed pulls a couple of Hammerspace
tomato slices from his shirt pocket, and slaps them on Shaq's burger) There, consider yourself tomatoe'd! Ha!
Shaq: You're not like other people, are you?