Funny / Girls' Frontline: Neural Cloud

Per wiki policy, Spoilers Off applies here and all spoilers are unmarked. You Have Been Warned.

With Neural Cloud being Girls' Frontline's Lighter and Softer prequel, it stands to reason that it'd have a lot more funny moments.

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Main campaign

• Several cutscenes in the game have a Dialogue Tree with at least one option that's quite obviously the "joke" option, painting the Professor as The Gadfly. The later in the main story one goes, the more likely these dialogue trees contain nothing but joke options, usually at the expense of the resident stoic or Deadpan Snarker's patience (usually Antonina).
• Chapter 2 (Cyclopes Sector):
  • In the opening cutscene, Persicaria checks in on Croque, who's about ready to pass out due to working on the Oasis's defenses all day yesterday. Croque bemoans the argument happening between Riko and Sol, not only preventing her from going back to sleep, but also for the fact that they're both extroverts, causing Croque to mumble to herself at length about how tiring extroverts in general are.
    Croque: Yes yes I know I'm a shut-in who's no good at socializing this sort of thing is a pain in the ass why do people even like it besides I don't even like all this in-the-moment stuff is it really my fault all this normie crap should go and discombobulate I just want to NEET it up in my own room in a world of my own with a bottle of—
    Persicaria: Ahem. We were talking about the reconstruction of the Oasis, weren't we?
• Chapter 6 (Copley Sector):
  • During the opening cutscene, Sol, who was formerly an archaeological assistant before Project Neural Cloud, ends up breaking down into a cathartic tirade after seeing Copley's beach scenery, apparently having silently tolerated all the indoor areas from the previous five chapters. Persicaria couldn't do anything besides listen in exasperation, while Antonina is stuck having to figure out the Buffy Speak Sol uses to describe the previous sectors' Geo Effects and stage hazards.
  • The Professor's master plan for getting reinforcements against Demiurge and her Entropics was simply to randomly call the Sanctifier HQ until they got into contact with anybody from the moderate Eosphorus faction. Antonina is quick to point out how stupid this is, even for a risk taker like the Professor, and tells them to consider themselves lucky that Love was the first Intermediate Sanctifier they contacted.
  • The chapter's stinger introduces Malkira to the audience, who's largely implied to be the leader of the Entropics. She's also described as a carefree black goat randomly skipping around in an empty Null Sector within Magrasea, talking to an associate over her comms in a cutesy tone. Not exactly the sort of thing one would imagine from the leader of a faction that spreads around a trojan that's life-threatening to Dolls.

Events

• Livestreaming:
  • Most of the event consists of Kuro making a complete and utter fool of the Intermediate Sanctifier Reverence, streaming the latter's ineffective pursuit of the former all throughout the Burbank Sector.
  • At one point, Kuro challenges Reverence into seeing who can attain the most stream followers in a given time period. Reverence, not exactly being the sharpest tool in the Sanctifiers' shed, decides to go along with this and predictably gets trounced by Kuro, who was literally built by Cyber Media for the sole purpose of capturing the livestreaming market. Reverence made almost zero effort to address her audience in anything other than a stiff and professional tone, only giving Kuro more reasons to make fun of her. Reverence eventually comes back to her senses, questioning why she even fell for Kuro's "tricks" to begin with, and immediately starts trying to smash Kuro with her hammer again.
  • Kuro ropes an unfortunate bystander who calls herself Agent 7 into her escape attempt, eventually stopping in an abandoned performance stage to catch their breath. Agent 7 then reveals herself as none other than Nanaka, the lead singer in Cyber Media's all-Doll Idol Singer outfit "NotREAL?". Kuro, being an avid Fangirl of Nanaka's since long before Project Neural Cloud, ends up reduced to a stammering mess for several seconds before attempting to get her autograph, even when Reverence starts smashing in the stage's doors.
  • In the event's farming stage, one of the Anomaly Node events shows Kuro miserably failing in her attempt to become an idol singer herself in one of her livestreams, opening her mouth only to freeze up from her nerves and run offstage in embarrassment. The event's Flavor Text mostly consists of a chat log set in the aftermath of this livestream, with random people either making fun of Kuro or calling her embarrassment cute. The text on the button to exit the prompt is written from the Professor's perspective, who apparently also had plans for Kuro to become an idol so she could at least contribute to the Oasis's operand income.
• Magrasea's Lang Syne:
  • One of the first lines in the event is a callback to the Livestreaming event, where Kuro expresses her utter boredom in the Oasis because nobody's an interesting enough trolling target as Reverence is.
  • The Professor saddles Kuro with handling the Oasis's New Year's celebrations as she's been mostly a Lazy Bum the entire time she's been there. When Daiyan arrives at the Oasis, Kuro immediately starts thinking up excuses to pass the responsibility onto her (but not before another bout of Inelegant Blubbering in front of another Cyber Media superstar). This ends up biting her in the ass when Daiyan predictably consults the Professor on what she's required to do, having arrived in the Oasis mere minutes ago. The player is presented with a dialogue prompt to give Kuro another task to do — even if they pick the one that seems least likely to annoy Kuro (livestreaming the festivities), she'll immediately express dismay that the Professor's "bullying" her and chastize Daiyan for playing along so well with the Professor despite being a newcomer, thanks to her professionalism.
  • While Kuro is showing Daiyan around the Oasis, she feigns exhaustion to get out of her duties. This also bites her in the ass as Daiyan, being the Nice Girl she is, immediately takes her to the Oasis's treatment ward... which is headed by Mad Scientist Florence. As Daiyan is walking away from the place, she hears Kuro's screaming in the distance, which she humorously misinterptets as Florence being an extremely competent doctor.
  • The next day, Sockdolager is seen accompanying Daiyan as her replacement guide. When asked for a place in the Oasis where she can get to know as much of the staff as possible, Sockdolager's first thought isn't something reasonable like a lounge or cafeteria, but the Oasis's training area. Daiyan spends most of her time in bewilderment watching Python yelling at his trainees and trying to make sense of Simo, who accidentally spooks Daiyan in his introduction. When Daiyan asks Simo for info on the Oasis's residents to help her plan the New Year's party, he initially claims to have barely any knowledge of them before belting out an extremely long list of Dolls he knows and their quirks, with Daiyan lampshading the contradiction immediately afterwards. When Sockdolager and Daiyan take their leave, Aki tries to unwind with Simo after his intense training session with Python. When Simo tells Aki that he told Daiyan the wrong info for Aki's preferred food, Aki outs himself as a huge Daiyan fanboy and laments not getting her autograph at her last performance. Simo tries to reassure Aki, but instead gets a completely serious lesson on how to properly get an autograph from Aki for his troubles.
    Simo: You can go after her. I'm sure she hasn't gone far.
    Aki: It's not the same. There's a certain kind of formality which needs to be observed when getting an autograph. If there's no sense of formality, then the important thing is the surprise of an accidental meeting. The regret of missing an opportunity is beautiful in its own right.
    Simo: Well, rather than discuss aesthetics, Instructor Python's looking over this way, so if you don't go...
    Aki: Aw, hell. See you tomorrow, I'm off.
  • While Sockdolager and Daiyan are on lunch break in the Oasis's cafeteria, Aki arrives on the scene with a blank piece of paper, asking Daiyan for her autograph (with Sockdolager promptly lampshading Aki's desperation). Before Daiyan could do so, however, Kuro runs into the room screaming her head off, asking Sockdolager and Aki to save her from Florence, who's wielding a set of mysterious syringes like they're Wolverine Claws. Aki considers refusing as Kuro had stolen his last serving of unagi a few days ago, but realizes four ladies are currently behind him, deciding to stay in place to defend them from Florence. The audience is then treated to a CG◊ of Aki "dying" standing up with Florence's syringes all over his upper body, quoting his death line as he passes out.
    Aki: The loser scatters, like fallen cherry blossoms...
  • Later that night, Persicaria is seen showing Daiyan around the cafeteria's cooking facilities after tending to Aki's wounds. Before Daiyan could start putting her meal plans into motion, Sol wanders into the cafeteria with her face completely covered in bandages◊, apparently having pushed herself too far during one of Python's training sessions. Daiyan asks Sol if she has any preference for steamed buns, initially referring to them as "just convenient finger food" before Daiyan asks her if Sol bothers to use any dipping sauce with them, blowing Sol's mind. When she starts rummaging through the fridge wondering aloud what type of sauce would go well with buns, the player is prompted with the choice of ketchup, mayo, or mustard. Regardless of the choice, Daiyan gets royally pissed while still maintaining her gentle smile, giving Sol a lengthy lesson on the relationship between dishes and spices, leaving Sol at a complete loss for words. Daiyan later teaches Sol how to make some traditional Chinese dipping sauces, with Sol getting annoyed at the process and asking Daiyan if there's a ready-made version of the sauce that's sold anywhere. Naturally, this pisses Daiyan off again.
    Daiyan: Aiyah! You just don't understand! The Kitchen God would cry if he heard you say that!
  • Oasis's New Year's Eve party kicks off in the cafeteria, with Daiyan presenting a comically long list of Chinese dishes she cooked up the night before, to everyone's increasing bewilderment. The narration stops bothering to keep track of this train of thought by the seventh course of meals — by then, everyone present in the cafeteria was worried they'd be full partway through taking a single bite from every dish.
  • The beginning of the epilogue shows everyone in the cafeteria absolutely wasted from "high-intensity operands" (read: alcohol), with the Professor stuck handling the cleanup. When they stumble upon Croque and Sol, they're both having an argument over a shared hallucination of a Humongous Mecha from Croque's favorite anime, METAL SUIT:
    Croque: Pro... Professor! I'm telling you, there really are Metal Suits flying in the sky. Look at that (hic) that light... that light over your head!
    Professor: ...Get a good rest, Croque.
    Croque: No, look at the light over your head, it's a Metal Suit's headlight, if you don't run you'll be (hic) squashed!
    Professor: ...Right, let's run first, and you run to your dorm from here.
    Croque: But I can't move...
    Sol: Prof, you take Croque and run... It's just a Metal Suit, watch me... I'm lifting it up!
    Croque: Don't you dare... look down on Metal Suits! Have a punch from yours truly!
    Professor: ...Why did I even try to reason with these drunkards...