While Ladybug works for an agency that assassinates people, he is not an assassin himself, working purely on retrieval or snatch and grab jobs. He has a bit of complex over the fact that people keep dying around him anyway, which he attributes to his terrible luck. Such as a time that he was taking blackmail photos and a suicidal bellhop jumped off the roof only to land on his car.
Lemon basing much of his philosophy on Thomas the Tank Engine, which annoys the hell out of Tangerine.
Lemon and Tangerine arguing about exactly how many people they killed, complete with flashback to the job where their past selves tally up the kills. The last person was just an innocent bystander (played by the director of the film, no less) in the wrong place at the wrong time when the brothers' abandoned car blows up with him.
Ladybug, already annoyed at the unexpected complications of the job, is about to exit the train, only to run headfirst into the Wolf. The film immediately cuts into a whole flashback of the feared assassins life, running through the loss of his beloved mom, his action-filled rise through the ranks of the Cartels, finding his first and true love, the extravagant wedding and the horrible deaths of everyone present due to poisoning, ending in the Wolf holding his wives' corpse and screaming NO!!! to the skies, all in the span of three minutes. Before cutting back to the present were an enraged wolf goes after Ladybug with a knife.
Tangerine's completely unimpressed assessment of the White Death's goons at one of the early stops, saying he expected hardened criminals, not an 80s dance group.
This exchange between Lemon and Tangerine.
Tangerine: You still got that vest on ya? Lemon: No. Vests give you a false sense of security. You might, like, get shot in the neck. Tangerine: It also stops you from getting shot in the chest but I guess you missed that episode of Thomas, did ya? Lemon: I really must've because that sounds dark as shit.
The entirety of the quiet car fight scene, especially with the old lady shushing both Lemon and Ladybug. The best part comes after Ladybug smacks Lemon unconscious with a laptop then casually pretends to type on it.
Old Lady: (whispering) SHHHH!!! I'll call the conductor!!! Ladybug: Eat a bag of dicks, lady. Old Lady:[gasps] Ladybug: (is immediately regretful) I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm working on it.
The train passenger played by Channing Tatum constantly thinking other guys are propositioning him for sex, only to be disappointed when they're not interested.
Ladybug having the sheer nerve to ask Tangerine to pay for the sparkling water he gets during their trying not to arouse suspicion from the concessions girl - and he does, grumbling at the price all the while.
Ladybug: Oh, man, I forgot, I gave all my money to that guy for the hat and sunglasses thing. Can you... Tangerine:[stares at him incredulously] Ladybug:[smiles weakly] Tangerine:[gets out his wallet while muttering]
And once the lady is out, the very first thing Ladybug does is to knock Tangerine cold by throwing that bottle at his head.
Ladybug refers to an assassination as a "whack."
Ladybug: That's right, I'm bringing it back. Maria: No, please don't, leave it where it was.
Some of the banter between Ladybug and Maria Beetle. Especially when Ladybug becomes impressed with a bidet.
During a tear-up fight between Tangerine and Ladybug, Tangerine's phone rings. He reluctantly pauses the fight to answer it (putting it on speaker), only to find that his employers want him and Lemon off the train at the next stop, with the case, or they'll kill everyone on the train. Tangerine notes to Ladybug that since he can't get Lemon or the case before the next stop (Ladybug helpfully tells him that the case is at the other end of the train), they're all dead anyway and there's no point in fighting. Then Ladybug realizes there's another solution...
Ladybug: Do they actually know what your brother looks like? [Smash Cut to Ladybug and Tangerine on the platform with a silver case] Yakuza: Now I see why they call you twins. You look alike.
Ladybug smacks the fake case to show the yakuza they mean business... only for his bad luck to kick in, so he accidentally hits the correct combination. It falls open, revealing it's full of lingerie. There's a Beat as everyone stares, and then Tangerine and Ladybug dive back onto the train right as the doors close.
Tangerine: What were you even doing!? Ladybug: I was trying to sell it, you know...
After the Hornet gets poisoned and Ladybug uses her sole vial of antivenom on himself, he casually asks if he can get her anything, like water or a blanket and offers to hold her hand, all while she very loudly and painfully dies. It's hard to tell if he's being genuine or just mocking her.
The meta joke of him being accidentally sexist, so he apologises for mansplaining the venom's effects to her... totally unrelated to the fact that it's a scene of a guy beating a Dark Action Girl senselessly.
When the Elder arrives on the train, he tries to tell a story to Ladybug (his origin story specifically), only for Ladybug to keep insisting he really doesn't want to hear it.
The Elder and the Prince's bemused reactions when the snake suddenly bites Ladybug out of nowhere.
The Prince: ...was that a snake?
When Ladybug comes back after the snake thing, the Elder asks him if he's alright. Ladybug wearily explains that, by sheer goddamn coincidence, he had recently taken the antivenom for that exact snake.
Ladybug: I'm... probably all right.
Ladybug and the Elder open the bathroom to retrieve Yuichi, who complains that Lemon shot him. Ladybug tries to sympathize by explaining that Lemon shot him, too (twice), and the Elder simply stares at him in disbelief.
The Elder tries to get the survivors (Ladybug, Lemon, and his son) to work together by quoting a koan. No one, including his son, gets it.
Lemon's role in the climax is to drive the train. He gets to the controls only to realize everything is in Japanese and he doesn't know how to drive a train.
Ladybug: You can stop the train. Lemon: Uh, about that. I took the velocity of the train and divided it by the mass, and I realized that I don't know how to fuckin' drive a bullet train! Ladybug: Dude, all you do is talk about trains! Lemon: Man, Thomas is a metaphor for life, not how to actually drive!
Early on, we find out that Ladybug is only on this mission because Carver called in sick. Ladybug repeatedly complains about Carver being an ass. Then we find out that the entire film was a plot by the White Death to kill everyone responsible for his wife's death... including Carver. The look of "Are you kidding me?" on Ladybug's face has to be seen to be believed.
The audience finally gets to see what Carver looks like and he's played by none other than Ryan Reynolds in a blink-and-you'll-miss-it cameo, repaying Brad Pitt for the gratuitous appearance Pitt made in Deadpool 2.
The two mooks arguing over opening the briefcase, with one being Genre Savvy enough to realize that there might be a bomb or something in there and that they're just the fall guys. Sure enough, he opens the briefcase and the bomb Prince planted goes off.
The negated heartwarming moment between Ladybug and Lemon at the end.
Lemon: And I've got another brother now! Ladybug: (smiling) Really? Lemon: (quickly drops his smile) FUCK NO!
When the train derails and crashes through the city, Ladybug is sent flying through the train cars, at one point getting hit in the face by a random coffee pot, and successfully breaking his fall by landing on the Momonga costume (which lets out a squeak as he impacts it).
The White Death, who has been stoic and calm for most of his screentime, throwing a tantrum when Ladybug tells him he's not Carver (the assassin who killed White Death's wife and the primary target of his entire revenge plot) because Carver called in sick.
White Death: THE CARVER! I WANT THE CARVER! I HIRED THE CARVER!
The exhausted way he points his gun to his own head as he flatly repeats "you are filling in?" It really sells just how utterly done he is with how badly his revenge scheme has been derailed.
Especially his Lame Last Words to Ladybug just before the rigged gun he was using kills him when pulling the trigger.
Ladybug: Just let it go, bro... White Death:DO NOT CALL ME BRO!!! Ladybug: Okay… [the rigged gun The White Death was using when he was about to kill Ladybug suddenly explodes, blowing half his head off]
After The White Death is killed by the rigged gun, The Elder removes his sword from his corpse, inadvertently splashing the blood onto Ladybug's shoe, much to Ladybug's disgust.
The Fiji water bottle that gets used throughout the story getting its own epic intro card and backstory along with everyone else pursuant to Yuichi throwing it at the White Death to deflect his death bullet aimed for the Elder. When's the last time an inanimate object made you laugh like this?
Ladybug has a lot of tattoos. Look at the two on his right forearm when he's fighting The Hornet. One tattoo is a hornet, which is apparently menacing the other tattoo, which is a Sherman tank. We all know that Brad Pitt starred in Fury, which of course featured a Sherman tank.
