Funny: Blue Beetle
- Waaaaay back in the Charlton days, Beetle fought a gang of thugs who were trying to steal from the laboratory where Ted Kord worked. The thugs got away when one of them blindsided him with a piece of furniture. The female scientist in the lab asked if he was all right...
- Kid Devil: FLEE! FLEE FROM THIS PLACE OF GODLESS SCIENCE!
- The first appearance of Traci 13 to the comic.
Jaime: I just wish I could meet a cute girl who'd be okay with all the weird.Traci 13: (teleporting into the room) Are you the Blue Beetle?Paco: (jaw gaping) Say "I wish for a Porsche" before it wears off! Say "I wish for a Porsche" before it wears off!
- Upon being headbutted:
Blue Beetle: AH! That hurt through the armor! What are you packing in there?!Lonar: JUSTICE!Blue Beetle: You have a forehead full of justice? What does that even MEAN?!
- Guy Gardner, uncharacteristically swallowing his pride, comes to Jaime's house to try and apologize. Jaime, understandably freaked out because Guy tried to kill him at their last meeting, blasts Guy and screams for everyone to run. Instead, his mom just marches right into the middle of it and starts lecturing him.
Bianca Reyes (Jaime's mom): Is this how we raised you? If this is how you're going to behave with superpowers, young man, that is not acceptable...(Guy starts to get up, his temper long gone and his ring starting to form weapons. Bianca promptly whirls on him and gives him both barrels as well)Bianca Reyes: Is that a giant green fist?Guy Gardner: (backing up and sweating visibly) Uh... uh... er..Bianca Reyes: Is. That. A. Giant. Green. Fist.Brenda: Always the cool mom...Paco: Wow. She's...Alberto Reyes (Jaime's dad): The reason I never have to raise my voice.
- Eclipso trying to unleash Jaime's Superpowered Evil Side to kill Paco:
Paco: Let's get it done, you purple freak.Eclipso: I'll make it special for you. I am wrath. I am temptation. I deliver to each their own, fitting, perfect destruction.Blue Beetle: 'AGGHHH!Eclipso: I will release Jaime Reyes' deepest, darkest fantasies of ultimate power. You will die at the hand of your dearest friend! Witness the monster within the Blue Beetle!Jaime: I— am— a dentist!Eclipso: Wait. What? What in Neron's name is going on here?Traci 13: Got me.Eclipso: You're the secret power fantasy of a teenager with an alien killing machine at his command?
- That's a Crowning Moment of Heartwarming, too. Why does he want to be a dentist? To pay off his parents' mortgage, send Milagro to college, get a vacation home near his grandma's.
- Even funnier is Paco bringing down dentist!Jaime with a 2x4 whack upside the head. "Are we done here?"
- When Jaime tells Paco that he's just glad that his life can get back to normal. Cue the next page of Jaime Face Palming and looking at a cow mutilated by aliens.
- In the New 52's issue #9 of Blue Beetle, Blue Beetle encounters Green Lantern Kyle Rayner, Red Lantern Bleez, and Orange Lantern Glomulus in New York City and end up fighting because the Scarab thinks they're enemies. During the fight, Bleez pounces on Blue and pins him down between her legs. The Scarab then gives Blue a heads-up on his vitals:
Scarab: Registering metabolic arousal.Blue Beetle: Stop it Bugsuit, I am not "aroused"!Bleez: (backing off) What did you just say?!Blue Beetle: (covering his crotch) It's just the armor, I swear! Parts of it sorta morph sometimes and...
- In issue #4 of Blue Beetle (New 52), Paco is at a party with his gang, Chuco-Thirteen. Suddenly, supervillains Warp, Phobia, Plasmus, and Silverback show up looking for Paco to interrogate him about the Scarab. Chuco-Thirteen's gangmembers all whip out guns and point them at the supervillains. Except for Paco, who knows what they can do and runs away as fast as he can.
Gangmember: Don't worry Paco, we don't rat out— (realizes Pacos not there) —our own...Paco:(running away) ...*hff*...*hff*...*hff*...
- In issue #2 (New 52), at Brenda's quinceañera, La Dama suggests that Brenda should find a boyfriend.
Brenda: But I'm not interested in any boys I know.La Dama: Oh come on. He looks handsome enough.Brenda: Joey Gonzalez?! I'd rather crap broken glass!La Dama: Well that was ladylike...