Funny / American Pie

You're bound to get a ton of these when the premise is young men trying to lose their virginity.

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  • Stifler's taunting of Sherman at his parties.
  • "Here's a thought: I'll get you a spoon so you can eat my ass!"
  • "Howdy-howdy fuckin' pardners!"
  • Stifler earning some serious gay street cred in a dance-off in part 3.

    American Pie 1 
  • "Suck me, beautiful."
  • "Hey Stifler, how's the pale ale?"
  • The Nadia video.
  • "Son, I want to talk to you about masturbation." (Jim rolls eyes)
  • At the prom, the hired band does an awful cover of "Don't You Forget About Me", causing at least one person to shout "You suck!".
  • When Michelle asks Jim to tell one of his stories, Jim knows just the one...
    Jim: Stifler finds this beer, right?
  • "And this one time, at band camp, I stuck a flute in my pussy."
  • "Oh, Finch!! " "Oh, STIFLER'S MOM!! "
    • Followed by Jim and Michelle having wild sex in what is obviously little brother Stifler's room.

    American Pie 2 
  • Jim meets Michelle after she used and left him, and he asks if he was any good.
    Oh wow. How could I sucked.
    • Though she still really likes him, affectionately saying he's her bitch. As well as the revelation of the other guys in bed with their girl sleeping on their shoulder, Jim is sleeping on Michelle's. Then there's her advice on seduction when Jim wants to grope her boobs.
    No, dingbat. You can't just go groping away. You gotta pre heat the oven before you stick in the turkey.
  • When Jim, Finch and Stifler have to do gay stuff in order to get two women to do lesbian stuff.
    Oz: (Watching Jim and Stifler kiss from outside) Ugh, Kev you can look.
  • And this one time, at band camp, Michelle stuck a trumpet up Jim's ass.
  • Jim supergluing one hand to his penis and the other to a porno, and trying to leave his room through the window looking like that.
    • Then when he's in the hospital with his dad, an old lady chews him out for possessing porn. Jim's dad goes all Papa Wolf on her, accidentally letting the whole hospital hear that his son glued his hand to his penis.
    "But you wouldn't know about that because you don't have a penis...Or maybe you do!"
  • "I am the Sherminator".
    • And he lands Nadia. BECAUSE he's a geek. Cue "WTF!?" stares from Stifler and Jessica.

    American Wedding 
  • When Jim's proposal to Michelle in "Wedding" goes horribly wrong - long story short, his dad ends up accidentally forcing him to expose himself to the entire restaurant.
    • "Dear Stifler, I will be forever in your debt if you teach me to dance like you did in the gay bar..."

    American Reunion 
  • In Reunion Jim getting his erm, manhood stuck in the laptop while trying to hide his porn viewing from his son and then walking in on Michelle having A Date with Rosie Palms in the bathtub.
  • After Jim and Michelle have sex, he asks if he was better than the shower and the flute.