Funny / A World of Laughter, a World of Tears

• Orson Welles and Ed Wood preparing to leave for the Oscars:
  Ed Wood: Why, Orson? What're we gonna do tonight?
  Orson Welles: The same thing we do every night, Eddie. Try to take over the movies!
  • It's even funnier when you remember that the Brain's voice was directly inspired by Welles.
• After Roy Cohn snaps and breaks Rockwell's nose, his worst enemy James Dodd pulls him into a closet.
  "Surprised you pulled me away" I mumbled. "Two more hits, and I would've been arrested for murder. You could've had me out of the White House." [Dodd] grinned in that infuriating way that he had, and said "Yeah, I thought of that. But, see, you would've killed Rockwell, and I figured it's a little too late in the day for me to start liking you over something like that." We looked at each other, and he chuckled, and I did too, and pretty soon we were laughing like maniacs together. He's a little shit, sure, but hell, he had his moments.
• A young Kim-Jong Il ending the Korean War by asking his father why they're fighting Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck.
• Pat Boone getting the number one song on American Bandstand.
• A 13 year old Bill Clinton nicknaming the Disney Defenders "tits". Only Clinton could look at a Gestapo-style enforcement agency (with Alliterative Acronyms no less!) and took their "DD" for something else.
• The Beach Boys being introduced to marijuana.
• Orson Welles' Bedmate Reveal with Vampira, whom he also got engaged to during the night.