Film: Santa's Slay

A 2005 Horror/Comedy, starring Bill Goldberg as Santa.

It's Christmas once again. Family dinner, yuletide feelings, all that. But there's something different about this Christmas. Namely, Santa. Turns out all the stories about Santa are fake. Namely, he's not a jovial giftgiver. He's the spawn of Satan, who was defeated in a curling match with an Angel. As such, he was sentenced to deliver presents to the world for 1000 years as punishment.

And the 1000 years are up. And Santa decides to make up for lost killing time in the quaintly named Hell's Township. It's up to a teenaged boy named Nicholas Yuleson to put a stop to this Red Christmas, and put "Saint" Nicholas down once and for all.

Tropes featured in this film:

  • Badass Baritone: Santa.
  • Bad Santa: Well, duh.
  • Booze Flamethrower: Santa uses this in the opening to set a woman's hair on fire.
  • Casting Gag: The family Santa slaughters at the films start (And even Santa himself) are all played by Jewish actors.
  • The End... Or Is It?: Santa is destroyed while flying in the sky on his sleigh, but shows up just before the end credits in an airport traveling incognito.
  • From the Mouths of Babes: "Can we open our fucking presents now?"
  • God Was My Copilot: The grandfather turns out to be the same angel who won the curling match. He fell in love with a mortal woman and was Brought Down to Normal to stay with her.
  • Horror Doesn't Settle for Simple Tuesday: Set around Christmas, the only time of the year when Santa can kill people.
  • I Don't Like the Sound of That Place: Hell Township.
  • Kick the Dog: Literally. When Santa boots a yappy dog into a ceiling fan.
  • Mugging the Monster: A rather dim robber decides to try and mug Santa while he mockingly collects for charity. He winds up with a candy cane through the eye, and tossed in a dumpster.
  • Pun-Based Title
  • Screw the Rules, I Make Them!: The grandfather/angel challenges Santa to another curling match with the stakes being Santa becomes good forever if he loses, and the angel is sent to hell if he wins. Santa provides the curling 'circle', a portal to hell, and when the angel manages to get a curling stone very close to the hole, making his win seem likely...Santa just grabs the angel and slide/throws him into the hole, 'winning' the match by default.
    "Christmas is over when I say it's over!"
  • Wrong Genre Savvy: Lampshaded when Nicholas shines a light in Santa's face, and it doesn't do anything.
    Santa: I'm Santa Claus, not fucking Dracula!
  • Yes Virginia: Santa says "yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus" to a woman surprised by him breaking into the house.