hary poter drug dealer
is a So Bad, It's Good Harry Potter fanfic written by kingofwhales.
It tells the story of how Harry, Hermione and Ron enter the world of drug dealing thanks to Dumbledore.
Tropes in this fanfic:
- Adaptational Villainy: Multiple characters get hit by this. Such as:
- Dumbledore, who's a secret drug lord and is also a pedophile that "does illegal all the time".
- The main trio as a whole, as they're remorseless killers and also drug dealers. Specially Harry, as he laughed when Dudley hanged himself, murdered all police officers in the world, sold Ron and Hermione's retarded son for $1 and raped both of them when Ron called him a "basturd".
- Adaptational Skill: Ron can sense people's life energy due to being a redhead, and Hermione can read minds with her "telekinesis".
- Adaptational Wimp: Voldemort gets easily intimidated by Harry's bazooka and gets killed by it after he tries to harm Harry.
- all lowercase letters: The title of the story is in lowercase.
- Badass Normal: Out of the 3 main characters, Harry is the only one who doesn't have a secondary non-magical power, unlike Ron, who can sense life energy, and Hermione, who can read minds, yet he's still extremely dangerous, having singlehandedly raped the two of them and also killed the strongest wizards in the world.
- Body Horror: How in the hell did Hermione manage to insert her vagina inside Ron's dick anyway?!
- Charles Atlas Superpower: Apparently, Ron can feel the life energy of people because he's "red hed".
- Crack Fic
- Driven to Suicide: Dudley hangs himself in Chapter 1 after he gets fatshamed by Freddy and George.
- Police Are Useless: When Ron and Hermione tell a police officer that Harry raped the two of them, what's the first thing the officer does? Try to grope Hermione... Officer of the year, people!
- Rape as Drama: Harry rapes both Ron and Hermione in the penultimate chapter and leaves them in the snow; this breaks their friendship and indirectly makes Ron and Hermione turn into vigilantes.
- Rouge Angles of Satin: The whole story is written like this.
- Shout-Out: Assuming the story is a Troll Fic, Hermione being capable of reading minds with her "telekinesis" may be a reference to a similar line in My Immortal
- You Basturd!: After Harry sells Ron and Hermione's son, Ron calls him a "basturd" and tells him that he will "hell when [he] dead".
