Here we are. We're on the road again.
Half-Dead wakes up as a living mummy and ill most likely be doing that every day from now on. It's what happened to Littlepip and might have happened to a bunch of other people in sidefics I haven't read yet. She looks at a map and sees her first evidence of the Pony/Zebra war with posters of Pinkie Pie, Twilight Sparkle, and Fluttershy.
>It might have been unfair of me, but I hoped that they’d done more to try and end the war than just make pithy quotes for posters.
...Here's hoping you come across SO MANY Memory Orbs.
So Scoodle is capable of firing guns off better than Blackjack and P-21 even though she doesn't have a cutie mark yet. She's going to become a raider, isn't she? There's going to be a point where she's Put on a Bus only for her to return and promptly get shot in the head by Blackjack. Scoodle even knows how to take apart and put together a gun! DO NOT TELL ME SHE DOESN'T BECOME A RAIDER.
The Crusaders and duo proceed to head on their way to Hoofington proper, picking off various animals and giving tips to the former stable dwellers. It' here we're introduced to Reapers. I mean Reapers. I mean Reapers. I mean... Reapers. Raiders who have apparently killed another raider in hoof-to-hoof combat. This is where it gets contradictory towards Murky Number Seven and that's okay. Here it is, folks! Proof that you do not need to take every single sidefic as canon!
More Exposition happens about stuff we already know but Half-Clueless and Penis Attached To Pony don't exactly know about dealing with DJ PON3, The Steel Rangers, The Enclave, and various other tidbits. They reach Boneyard which is obviously much more hardcore than The Thunderdome.
Blackjack decides to not think about it and disturb the bones, awakening a large group of feral ghouls which proceed to attack the group.
>One ghoul pony gripped Scoodle by her haunches, the other by her shoulders. With monstrous strength they each pulled their half.
...Or Scoodle can just be unceremoniously killed. Damnit, Blackjack. She decides to try and Arbu the ghoul ponies because of that.
>It couldn’t get any worse than this, I thought.
>I’d soon think to myself, ‘Oh, silly Blackjack, it can always get worse.’
...Yes. If there's one thing even the stupid should never ever do, it's having those group of words appear in that order. Ever.
Another Ghoul pop up and... is that... Is that Silver Spoon? Boy, she'll be unhappy to hear that Diamond Tiara killed herself. Blackjack gets lucky enough to say her name as we find out that Silver Spoon's sanity has eroded to the point where she thinks it's the past and can't tell Blackjack's voice from Diamond Tiara's.
>“Like, get out of her way, losers, and find my glasses!”
...I think that would constitute as being in the top 5 of worst thing to say, right up along there with "Go to your room."
Meanwhile, they all continue on after the ghouls retreat. The Crusaders abandon our duo due to her incompetence. Half-Stupid has apparently entered Death Seeker mode already as P-21 yells at her to get herself healed and not be wracked with guilt so much that she's willing to die. To be honest, that's a little extreme of a leap there.
>"Learn from this, because if you ever kill another pony through stupidity then I will fucking end you."
Welp. This fanfic ends next chapter. Anyways, they reach a safehouse as Blackjack passes out from exhaustion and radiation sickness.
>I saw Deus laughing at me as he sawed off my PipBuck with a chainsaw penis.
...uh. MOVING ON.
Half-Death Seeker has guilt dreams for a while before waking up to Watcher.
>“I fucked up, Watcher.”
>“You’re not the first. And if I can be blunt, your fuck-up only killed one filly. I’ve known ponies whose fuck-ups killed millions. So on the grand scale of fuck-ups, I think you’re overrating yourself.”
I couldn't agree more. Spike continues the pep talk and convinces Blackjack to become The Atoner. Blackjack and P-21 come across a group of radgators surrounding a sky carriage and Blackjack is in desperate need of RadAway. P-21 ants to go, but Blackjack's Death Seeker mode comes up again as she shoots a radgator and makes them bumrush the duo, earning some ire from him. This causes Blackjack to run out of ammo and have only a single grenade left.
Watcher's peptalk didn't do a damn thing! Or is that just Blackjack's usual stupidity? She needs to think about it more.
P-21 yells at Half-Stupidity about how he still doesn't get to do anything he wants or even make any decision for himself. Blackjack realizes that working security wasn't as bad as she thought it was and he wanted to be a teacher. Well, P-21, your chance is now! Teach away! Half-Stupid needs it. Badly.
P-21 manages to reassure Blackjack about her stupidity and recklessness a tiny bit as they get the necessary RadAway and find their first Memory Orb. They don't look into it and the chapter ends.
>Skill Note: Guns (50)
Damn, fifty already!? Save some skillpoints for your other skills!
>Quest Perk: Minor Mutation: Rad Sight - When under the effects of minor radiation poisoning, gain +1 Perception in low light conditions. -15 to sneak, speech when not wearing sunglasses, authority glasses, or mirrored sunglasses.
Aaaand she's already a mutant. Littlepip didn't become one until the later chapters. They might actually be diverging at this point.
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