History WebVideo / SailorMoonAbridged

* TheDogBitesBack: Some idiots tried [[AttemptedRape sexually assaulting]] [[HeroicComedicSociopath Raye]] [[SuperVillainLair in her own home]] [[AloneWithThePsycho alone]]. [[TakeOurWordForIt Whatever she did]], [[RapeIsASpecialKindOfEvil they]] [[LaserGuidedKarma deserved it]] [[PayEvilUntoEvil on every]] [[TooDumbToLive possible level]].

* FromDressToDressing: Molly tries to use this as Fanservice for Nephlite, but he was too busy taking off his shirt to notice.

The official site's domain has sadly expired, but an archived version is thankfully available [[https://web.archive.org/web/20150928112305/http://www.sailormoonabridged.com/ here]] (with still-active links to unlisted episodes on their main YouTube account, as long as you delete the Internet Archive portion of a link) and the [[https://www.youtube.com/user/SMAseries backup YouTube account]] is also available.

* AttentionDeficitOohShiny: And how!

-->--'''Narrator and Queen Beryl''', the first lines of episode #1

!!This show provides examples of:

--->'''Orb:''' "Unh!!" ''*brief flash of white flies out of the orb*''\\
'''Beryl:''' "Sorry, it does that sometimes. Ignore it. What where you saying?"

-->'''Artemis:''' Run Luna! Run off that pregnancy!\\
'''Luna:''' What?! [[SomeonesTouchingMyButt I thought you said that was your tail!]]\\
'''Artemis:''' Run it off, bitch!

-->'''[=Megami33=]:''' Hi Everyone, You know here at SMA we like to joke at a bunch of things but rape isn't funny. At all. In fact all those that joke about it should go straight to-(Gets taken away by several people)

-->'''Tuxedo Mask''': ''{romantic music cuts out}'' Unconscious girls can't say no!\\

-->'''Zoisite''': Ooh- woah there am I interrupting? Should I close up that pod for a minute, let you finish up there?\\

--> '''Mina:''' You are on my turf HONEY! We may share a classroom and like share books and share needles but I ain't sharing my clientele.

--> "I'm still fat from the other episode!"

--> '''Useless Attack, Blast!''' - Sailor Mercury
--> '''RUN AWAY!''' - Sailor Mercury
--> '''Moon Healing Activation, GODDAMMIT!!''' - Sailor Moon
--> '''GIANTCRYSTALOFDEATH!!!''' - Queen Beryl
--> '''Venus Anal Beads, Vaginate!''' - Sailor Venus
--> '''Jupiter Hoe Slap Nipple Shocker!''' - Sailor Jupiter
--> '''Jupiter Home Biscuit Dizzle Slices Crash!''' - Sailor Jupiter

-->'''"Trainer":''' "Hey guys, I'm your token homosexual of the episode."\\
'''Serena:''' "He's really cute, but the purple's a little [-gay-]."\\
'''Molly:''' "Serena, he already ''said'' he's a homosexual."\\
'''Serena:''' "So does that make him ''gay?''"

-->'''Zoisite:''' The fact that I'm showing up within the first thirty seconds of this episode proves that I'm not going to succeed, even though all the odds are in my favor.

-->'''Amy:''' I get action!\\
'''Raye:''' YOUR RIGHT HAND DOESN'T COUNT!\\
'''Amy:''' Aww...

---> '''Sailor Venus:''' "That shit hasn't been funny since 2007!"

-->'''Molly:''' He touched me! I'm not a virgin anymore!
** Also:
-->"He touched that boy's breast! There's no greater offense!"

--> [Sailor Moon]'s sailing to the USA! Get it? It's a pun! Because [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment she's a sailor who's sailing]]. From the moon!

--> '''Alan:''' "Please say I can play my flute for you."\\
'''Serena:''' "You can do whatever you want with that flute!"

--> '''Tuxedo Mask:''' "Unconscious girls can't say no!"

-->'''Zoicite:''' Welcome Tuxedo Ma- [[InconvenientSummons whoa, there! Am I interrupting?]] Do you want me to close up that pod again, give you a minute to finish up there?\\
'''Darien:''' [[NotWhatItLooksLike No, no- she's just passed out.]]\\
'''Zoicite:''' ''(scoffs)'' That doesn't change anything.

--> '''Mina:''' Don't you remember? You were in a food coma for seven years and this is your daughter, Rini
-->'''Serena:''' ''(visually shocked/confused)'' WHAT!? How the heck did that happen!?

--->'''Meeting Raye:''' Wow! I wanna be a lesbian for her!
--->'''Meeting Mina:''' HAWT!

--> '''Malachite:''' Let the porno commence!\\
'''Zoisite as Sailor Moon:''' Oh, Malachite, you're so dirty!!\\
'''Malachite:''' Cue lightning! ''{*Lightning*}'' Damn, I'm so cool.

-->'''Serena:''' What's that? I can't hear you! ''kkkkkkkkkkch'' You're breaking up!
-->'''Amy:''' Serena, ''I can see you!''
-->'''Serena:''' ...No you can't.

-->'''Luna:''' [[LampshadeHanging "Windows Vista Intelligence System. We're 33 episodes into this show. How come nothing has actually happened yet?"]]

-->'''Serena:''' Everybody's gonna love my letter!\\

'''Serena:''' Those pricks didn't read my letter!

-->'''Mina:''' I spoke in Asian!!

--->'''Amy:''' "Please, Jesus, bring my friends home."\\
'''Jesus:''' "No."

-->'''[[NoIndoorVoice Raye]]:''' "GOD, ARTEMIS, YOU'RE SO LOUD!"

-->'''Darien:''' Don't underestimate her and her friends, simpleton. She'll never go to the ski resort.\\
'''Serena:''' I love the ski resort!

--->'''Andrew:''' You'll never leave me, right?\\
'''Rita:''' Ja!\\

'''Andrew:''' I guess I'll see you around, eh?\\
'''Rita:''' Ja! Bye-bye!

--->'''Nephlite:''' Everything is ruled by the ''stars''. [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment The movement of the]] ''[[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment stars]]'' [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment rules everything. The ruling of everything is by the]] ''[[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment stars]]''. [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment The]] ''[[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment stars?]]'' [[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment They]] ''[[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment rule.]]''

-->'''Serena:''' Wow! That blur filter almost makes it look like he's moving! [[LimitedAnimation I love low-budget anime!]]

--->'''Serena:''' What? Raye? Amy? Lita? Mina?\\
'''Mina:''' My name's no- oh, wait...

--->'''Serena:''' Christ, ''again?'' I mean, every '''*honk*'''ing episode...

* MotorMouth: Nancy Vargas, the IntrepidReporter from Episode 38:
--->'''Serena:''' I, uh, have a letter from Sailor Moon!
--->'''Nancy:''' [=OhmyGodwhatascoop!=] [=Itsaysshewantstomeetmeattheparkatmidnightandtellmeallabouthowshewantsto=]\\

[=letteranywaysyoucouldn'tpossiblybeSailorMoonyoulooknothinglikeher!=]
--->'''Serena:''' I have nooo idea what you just said! Bye!

-->'''Lita:''' Jupiter Home Biscuit Dizzle Slices Crash!\\
'''Mina:''' Haha, woah Lita like, no, never again, joke over!

-->'''Serena:''' Wow, Luna, way to stereotype, you bitch! I guess all fat people like cake and donuts too, right?\\
'''Luna:''' You said it, not me.\\
'''Serena:''' ...And pizzas, and pretzels, and chips...\\
'''Luna:''' Okay, Serena, I get it.\\
'''Serena:''' ...And cotton candy, and corn dogs, and hot dogs, and [[BreadEggsMilkSquick dogs in general]]...\\
'''Luna:''' This is Japan, not Korea!

-->'''Serena:''' "Oh, come on, Luna, don't be such a stoidgemeister!"\\
'''Luna:''' "A what??"\\
'''Serena:''' "I like making up words! Fudgecracklesnott!"\\
'''Luna:''' (EyeTake)

--->'''Raye:''' "STUPID. BITCH. CAN FLY. WHAT THE ''F[[SoundEffectBleep *honk*]]K''."

-->'''Alan:''' (Actual English Dub Dialog) Serena, my love for you circles the orbit of your planet—\\
'''Serena:''': *vrrrp!!* WHAT?!

-->'''Serena:''' Oh my god Darien is Tuxedo Mask. I can't believe it. I don't know why I'm talking like a robot.\\

** Artemis's drunken ramblings, and (eventually successful) attempts to seduce Luna.

-->'''Zoisite:''' What? You want me to wear a skirt?\\
'''Queen Beryl:''' What's wrong with that?\\
'''Zoisite:''' But... but...\\
'''Queen Beryl:''' You ''are'' a woman, aren't you?\\
'''Zoisite:''' ''{breaking down}'' I... I don't know anymore!

-->'''Serena:''' Seriously guys, that mother'''*slide whistle*''', monkey'''*foghorn*''', doughnut-sucking '''*bicycle horn*''' failed me. Who cares if she dies?
-->'''Molly:''' Aw, Serena, you're a total [[PrecisionFStrike bitch]]!
-->''(LaughTrack)''
* {{Spexico}}: The caption before episode 43 starts is "Today's episode is brought to you by España" (Spanish for Spain), but the backround picture shown is the Mexican flag. At first it might look like a [[CriticalResearchFailure blatant error]], but the title song was the Latin American version and the [[ByThePowerOfGrayskull transformation key phrase]] was the Castilian Spanish one, so it was actually [[PlayingWithATrope just played with]], [[RuleOfFunny maybe too much]].

--> '''Tuxedo Mask''': Oh, goddammit, she's so heavy! I have to use my [[NewPowersAsThePlotDemands time-rewinding powers]]!

-->'''Alan:''' Serena, my feelings reach beyond the orbit of your planet[[note]] (Actual Dialogue from the English Dub)[[/note]].\\
'''Serena:''' Your what?\\
'''Alan:''' I mean, your country! Yes, It was silly of me to say planet because that makes me seem like some kind of alien which of course I'm not because we're from the same planet. That being Earth. Which I'm from. Like you.

-->'''Raye:''' Oh shit, he's out cold! That's convenient; now I can transform! Mars Pow--\\
'''Chad:''' j/k lol.\\
'''Raye:''' Oh...oh hi...\\
'''Chad:''' Don't worry, I'll protect you!\\
'''Raye:''' Oh...great...\\
'''Chad:''' ''(attacks the youma with his head, is thrown against the wall again)''\\
'''Raye:''' Oh. He's out cold!\\
'''Chad:''' Wow, man, I need to work on my headbutts.\\
'''Raye:''' Oh… Uh, he's out… cold.\\
'''Chad:''' Raye, avenge me!\\
'''Raye:''' OKAY JUST STAY UNCONSCIOUS ''PLEASE!!''

-->'''Darien:''' I should at least kiss her goodbye.\\
'''[[spoiler:Raye]]:''' NO!\\
'''Darien:''' I think I should.\\
'''[[spoiler:Raye]]:''' DON'T!\\

'''[[spoiler:Serena]]:''' Wow, I'm feeling ''so'' much better!\\

'''[[spoiler:Raye]]:''' I'M GONNA STRANGLE HER!

-->'''Queen Beryl:''' And now we have Mercury to contend with. You know, there are nine planets so the longer we wait, the bigger that team gets. I mean, who's next, Uranus?\\
'''Jedite:''' Hah, Uranus.\\
'''Queen Beryl:''' Silence!

-->'''Raye:''' THAT SERENA ISN'T A SAILOR SCOUT, SHE'S A ''FAILURE'' SCOUT! ...OKAY, WHO THE F'''*honk*'''K WRITES THESE LINES?\\
'''Amy:''' Don't blame it on the [=SMA=] crew!\\
'''Raye:''' I BET THEY'RE LAUGHING AT MY MISERY!\\
'''Lita:''' I know I am, yo!

-->'''Amy:''' [[AssShove How did you fit that up there?]] Do you want to get dysentery?\\
'''Luna:''' Trust me, where ''I'm'' from, every cat can fit much bigger things than that.[[note]] ("that" being Amy's computer)[[/note]]

-->'''Alan:''' That girl has such passion. I want to lick her [[Film/TropicThunder Booty Sweat!]]\\
'''Anne:''' You never like MY Booty Sweat anymore!

-->'''Sailor Moon:''' All you have to do is touch it.\\

'''Queen Beryl:''' You traitor! [[DoubleEntendre You never touched mine!]]

* MusicalEpisode: Doubles as a Pokemon Crossover, sort of... Also, [[CrowningMomentOfFunny quite hilarious]].

Former members [=MaxSkate2001=] and [=Whip0fAlchemy=] both resigned for scheduling reasons. [=Whip0fAlchemy=] has since [[ExecutiveMeddling attempted]] abridging ''Anime/RevolutionaryGirlUtena'' and joined the cast of ''WebVideo/MetalGearSolid2SonsOfAbridgerty''. SMA was dragged into TheWarOfTheAbridgedSeriesCreators in 2008, which they handled in a surprisingly mature way.

** A quiet example- [[{{Pokemon}} "Ring, ring, ring, ring. Phone call. Phone call."]]

* ChristmasSongs: Parodied in an album offered on their site. Chris "Kirbopher" Niosi, Megami's (ex)boyfriend, animated a video of one, including drawing Serena as VideoGame/PacMan (see the page pic).

* Foreshadowing: In an early episode, Melvin discuseses the character of the day, Princess Diamond, who he says has no relation to Prince Diamond. When Serena asks who that is, Melvin says she'll see when the show gets to that part, to which she answers the show will never get that far, and sure enough, the show indeed ended before the second half of Sailor Moon R, which is where Diamond appears.

* BrainBleach: Serena flips out when the "seed" metaphors in the movie [[FreudWasRight get out of hand.]]

* FreudWasRight: Invoked many times. See LesYay, DudeShesLikeInAComa, etc.

The official site's domain has sadly expired, but an archived version is thankfully available [[https://web.archive.org/web/20150928112305/http://www.sailormoonabridged.com/ here]] (with still-active links to unlisted episodes on their main YouTube account) and the [[http://www.youtube.com/user/SMAseries backup YouTube account]] is also available.

The official site's domain has sadly expired, but an archived version is thankfully available [[https://web.archive.org/web/20150928112305/http://www.sailormoonabridged.com/ here]] and the [[http://www.youtube.com/user/SMAseries backup YouTube account]] is also available.

* ArtisticLicenseBiology: Pointed out in episode 32. Plot Point 5 - Mina somehow picks up Serena's DNA just from brushing her hair (enough to fool a DNA scanner disguised as a hair steamer). Of course, the original point was that a loose strand of Serena's hair could have wound up in Mina's brush, which then ended up in Mina's Hair. That one piece was picked up by the scanners. Plus, even if somehow all of those incredibly contrived events panned out exactly, it ''still'' wouldn't work because '''hair doesn't have any DNA in it'''. There might be a few testable skin cells on the follicle-end, but that's a long shot at best, and if the scanners were so absurdly sensitive that a few stray cells could fool them, anyone Serena made physical contact with in the past week would have yielded a similar false-positive result.
** In short, like Raye said, it is a [[NoIndoorVoice REALLY F#*KING RETARDED plot hole!]]

Get your hands on the episodes on the [[http://www.sailormoonabridged.com/ official site]] and the [[http://www.youtube.com/user/SMAseries backup YouTube account]].

Seeing that it's been since 2012 since any new videos have been put up, it's probably safe to assume this series has gone the way of the dinosaurs. However, in May 2014 [=KrisRix=] announced that the team intended to eventually fulfill their promise of at least completing the remaining two episodes of the ''Doom Tree'' arc.

* TruthInTelevision: After joking about the inconsistent name regarding that crystal everyone's suddenly obsessed with, Episode 19 ends with a compilation of dialogue snippets from the [=DiC=] dub, revealing that yes, [[TheyJustDidntCare they really didn't care]].

'''Serena:''' ''(visually shocked/confused)'' WHAT!? How the heck did that happen!?

* DangerouslyGenreSavvy: Nephlite, when he proposes they attack [[TokyoIsTheCenterOfTheUniverse outside of Japan]], er, America. He's quickly shot down by Queen Beryl though.

* GilliganCut:
** Episode 2.

** Episode 24/25:
-->'''Andrew''': You'll never leave me, eh?\\
'''Rita''': Ja!\\
''{Cut to Andrew and Rita at the airport}''\\
'''Andrew''': See you around, eh?\\
'''Rita''': Ja.

* GilliganCut: Episode 2.

* CallBack: Episode 39 is referenced by Artemis in TheMovie, when he mentions the moon kingdom had no militia.