Archived Discussion Main / CargoShip

• Especially since John is clearly not into it. Way to go, Quiznos. Imagine if John had been Jane?
  • Graham Aker's infamous "I want to embrace you, Gundam!", and his recurring penchant for similar statements.
  • When various characters think about who they're fighting for, Tiera says Veda, and Setsuna says Gundam.
  • Setsuna is more Cargo Cult
  • It's dirt common everywhere — This Troper has seen it in UC, AW and CE (with crossovers!), and is pretty sure it exists in all other timelines. And just let's not start about Gundam-girls...
  • Wufei of Gundam Wing canonically refers to his Gundam by the nickname he used for his dead wife.
• consider also the Mobile Trace System.

• And the souls of their pilot's dead mother. Thus possibly making it worse.
• Don't forget Ritsuko/Magi
  • Which is particularly disturbing, since Magi is derived from her mother's personality, which makes it kind of incestful.
  • Just like shipping Pilot/Eva!
  • Eva is one of the only works of fiction which can, itself be said to have an Oedipus complex.

  • The saddest part of those Gary hand ships? In the context they were originally created in (TPM Shippers Community forum, circa mid 2001), they were given those names as satire, and they were meant to actually refer to an actual platonic love, being largely inspired by one crack fic written by a well known shipper of the time, not to any. It was a huge in-joke to a very small subgroup of the shipping fandom, that's long since been forgotten with so many of the shippers of the time having moved on.

  • Suggested nothing: have you seen the opening credits? The shot with Winry sitting in bed, looking rather well-shagged, and the wrench beside her? That there is proof, my friends.

• That must be the single greatest ship ever. It sounds too cute not to be.
  • Oh, god... Now I can't get the idea of Bardiche and Raging Heart blushing any time Nanoha and Fate are near one another out of my head! Too Cute!
• This Troper dissents after watching too much of Episode 12 of Nanoha, wherein Fate practically cuddles with Bardiche, and declares that Fate×Bardiche is the one true Cargo Ship.
• Perversely shipping any of the Wolkenritter with anything is probably a Cargo Ship. They fall somewhere between Instant A.I.: Just Add Water! and Ridiculously Human Robot, being sufficently advannced Magitek programs manifested from the Book of Darkness.
• Nanoha/Raging Heart was canon from the first episode. That was their first kiss!

• Yuuko/beer? They are anything but an item. Yuuko'll drink anything that offers a(n alcoholic) buzz.
  • Oh, she isn't faithful to alcohol. She smokes tobacco too.
• After the Celes arc of Tsubasa, when Kurogane leaves Souhi (his sword) and Fai leaves his giant floofy fur coat behind in Celes, there were cries of Fluffy Coat/Souhi being an OTP. What Do You Mean, It's Not Symbolic??
• Finally, a completely, no-doubt canon cargo ship in the form of shamisen/plectrum.
  • Except it's a little more complicated than that, since they're not, technically speaking, cargo.

  • This troper feels dirty that, not only does she know what you're talking about, she actually has it saved.

• Does it get bonus points for one of the pair being a country?
  • If it counts, this troper has seen APH fanart of the actual countries (not the anthro-fied versions, mind you) getting down.

  • I'll raise you the entire Church Militant Organization/Curry.

• This Troper once saw a forum signature that supported Shirou/Obvious, Shiki/Death, and Shiki/Death/Shirou, the latter which apparently involves Shirou taking death for granted, and Shiki insisting death has more to offer than "people die when they are killed"
  • "Come on, this is hardly the worst thing you've caught me doing."

• This troper has seen plenty of Nico/Staff of One fics, and apparently according to some fics Chase's gauntlets before they got wrecked had an 'auto-wank' option.

• Wow, and here I thought Shipping was just a figure of speech...
• Don't forget Davy Jones and his bucket.
• Hey, Jack/Pearl is practically canon.
• "I have a jar of dirt!"
• Black Pearl/Kraken OTP. Locked in a tender embrace as they sink into the depths....
• Also can't forget Jack and his hat.
• And Jack/that rock he licked. Although it might count as Jack/Calypso by very long proxy.

• This editor sees your AT-AT humping and raises you a female (yes, female) AT-AT being tied up by snowspeeder tow-cables. Piloted by furries. Don't tell me you missed the bondage implications of the Hoth battle!
  • What, neither of you have ever seen the Scout Walker Kama Sutra?
  • When we said no exceptions, we weren't kidding.
• Any Jedi and their Lightsaber. One wonders if one can be built with a vibrate setting...
  • Be careful not to hit the activation switch....
  • That depends on which way you apply it.
  • Suddenly I have questions about the vibrosword — a popular weapon amongst non-Jedi.
  • Vibro edges uses very high frequency, so in a best-case imagine a Sonicare toothbrush.
  • It's actually explained in the EU book "Dark Rendezvous" that some lightsabers—particularly those given to Padawans—have settings, with the lowest one not cutting or hurting at all but merely stinging. If a Jedi is a bit of a masochist, one has to wonder...
• Rebel Starfighter pilots and their Astromech droids (i.e. Luke/R2D2).
  • Oh, I can top that: Matt Stover described on theforce.net how the Death Star trench run is the ultimate sexual metaphor. I mean, think about it: There's this hole, and Luke's the only guy (and they're all guys) who can get his proton torpedo in the exhaust port. Then there's his expression when he launches the proton torpedo. Oh, and to top it off, listen to some of the dialogue. I'm also assuming Luke/prosthetic is canon. I've also seen some people ship R2/3PO on the droid's side of things. Oh, and the whole plot to Children of the Jedi is Luke falling in love with a computer.
  • To be fair, it's the ghost of a long-dead Jedi stuck in a computer.
• Executor and Death Star II trumps all (at least until someone sees something better).
  • Han Solo has two loves. One is Leia. The other is the Millennium Falcon.

• It's a curious situation: I wanted to laugh because Chuck was devastated over losing a volleyball, but I also wanted to cry because, damn it, that was his only friend on that island.

• There's also the way Kirk was eyeing up the Enteprise while it was being built, then later when they were about to board her in space...
  • Bah, Narada/Enterprise FTW! 'Witness their love, in drabble form.
  • Screw y'all. Scotty/Enterpise is CANON. It's in the movie. He talks about getting his hands on the "fine lady"'s "ample nacelles".

• Almost? "Almost" is putting it mildly... Of course, it's far saner (and cuter) than most of the crack on this page...
  • 90% Cargo Ship, 10% Green Aesop. That sound right?
  • Well, there's also the slapstick.
• There's even 34 of it. Including one that made them into humans (both female!): a grease-covered Wrench Wench and a sleek Lady of War.
  • Pic. Now.
  • Here ya go.

• And now this troper needs to drink long into the night to try and forget that hilarious yet nightmare inducing mental image
  • This troper very clearly remembers a fic containing the line "Angel! Your car is humping my Bentley!" This may be the Crowning Moment Of Funny for everything produced for both fandoms combined ever.
  • That is the most epic pairing ever.
  • I demand links. (Here we go)
  • This Troper has seen a fic where they have babies. It's adorable.
• This Troper actually once saw a love story between The Whomping Willow and the Shrieking Shack.
  • Real life corrolary: Producing real, vibrating Harry Potter brooms. No, really. NO. REALLY.

• "Reluctantly, Jaypaw slid his paws from the branch. His pads felt warm where he had been touching it." "His paws felt heavy and unease flickered in his chest. Leaving the stick felt wrong. He wanted to understand why. I'll be back, he promised." "He hadn't realized that they had come this far around the lake. His paws tingled with excitement. The stick." "He wanted to run his paws over it again, feel the scars in its smooth surface. His pads felt warm as they stroked it, his heart suddenly as full as a well-fed belly." "The leaves swished like waves upon a shore. But Jaypaw hardly heard them. His ears were filled with whispering. His claws itched as he imagined the earthy scent of the stick...." "Jaypaw sat up. His paws ached to be outside. He wanted to touch the stick once more." "He lashed his tail, excited by the stormy weather and the thought of touching the stick once more." "His heart began to pound. He was certain it was gone, and not just because he couldn't scent it. There was a dark emptiness in his chest that told him the stick was no longer here." Yeah.
• Taken even further. From shipping characters and objects, to shipping characters and concepts. Like Lionblaze/Battle, Hollyleaf/Warrior Code (oh so very canon), and Tigerstar/Power and Bloodshed (actually canon depending on your interpretation of a line in the manga).

• This troper recalls a fic where Pollution subliminates his desire for Crowley by molesting the Bentley several times, much to Crowley's disgust and dismay. eventually Crowley catches him and makes a deal to have sex with him if he promises never to touch the Bentley again. The next day they realize it was a horrible mistake and Pollution pines for the Bentley from afar.
  • Links. Good heavens, links!

• It can also be paired with Dean and considering his utter devotion to it/her, it's not a massive stretch of the imagination practically canon.
• Does this make the scene where he smashes it up a case of domestic abuse?
• Sam briefly BECOMING the Impala in canon has arguably crossed the Dean/Impala 'ship into Wincest territory.
  • For that matter, Ronny/Drill Blaster◊ is pretty much canon.
  • This pic of Ronnie holding her second favourite tool◊ quickly led to this. Note the tshirt design.

  • ... and Adama just looked down and smiled!

• It's not canon?!

• Sweeney/razors is canon; there's actually a video on Youtube in which Sondheim talks about how "My Friends" is a love song to the razors and the actor should "make love to the razors".
• It gets worse. People name them. This troper's friend (who plays Todd on an RPG) has named one Michael Bublé and one Taye Diggs. Not only does Todd love the razors, but the razors love each other.
• This Troper once found a Fandom Secret that suggested that the relationship between Sweeney and his razors begat Edward Scissorhands.
  • There IS some family resemblance.

  • SHODAN?!?!? I have defied gods and demons!!! Durandal is mine!
  • Who pissed off Cortana? Seriously, someone calm her down.

  • And that's how LEGION was made
  • A malevolent AI orgy with all of the abovementioned as participants. That way, everyone's happy!
  • I must say that seeing this page has made me realize just how often the "malevolent AI" character type is used...
  • And then AM rapes (somehow), dismantles, and destroys them all at once with near omnipotent power, only to rage for eternity over how quickly he did so and having no more playmates as a result. Because that's just how Badass Ax-Crazy Wangsty he is.
  • MODOK?
  • Helios feels left out. (Rule 34 of Icarus/Daedalus merging probably exists too ...and JC for that matter.)
  • No love for the turrets? Think how lonely they must be, standing around waiting to shoot passing hapless humans.
  • So that's why they're so forgiving when you throw a cube at them- has anyone written Turret/Ciel yet?
  • GLaDOS / Castle Heterodyne. THERE I SAID IT.
  • GLaDOS and Sovereign. The reasons for this ship are far beyond your feeble comprehension. This conversation is over.
  • This list isn't complete without GLaDOS and your President, John Henry Eden. President of America, President of her heart.
  • DO YOU MORTALS FEEL I, THE MIGHTY ADBOT, IS UNWORTHY OF A POSITION ON THIS LIST?
  • Dorothy from Galerians needs love too! It can't be easy being a single mother and an evil computer. GLaDOS, Dorothy and SHODAN (just because she and dorothy are so alike) would be perfect...as perfect as three evil/insane computers in a lesbian relationship can be that is.
  • Bah, GLaDOS/Venjix. She totally goes for the kind of guy who not only nukes the world, but then toys playfully with the survivors like a kitty.
  • Heh, GLaDOS/Deep Thought/Earth. That's one hot interplanetary supercomputer threesome.
  • I must admit, I'm almost annoyed there's no GLaDOS/WOPR up here yet.
  • The Computer doesn't care if GLaDOS and Computer are ship, Computer just wants to be friends, friendship is mandatory. Failure to be friends is treason. Treason is punishable by summary execution. Have a nice day.
  • GLaDOS/Mother Brain. No, not that one.

• As soon as Gyakuten Kenji/Investigations comes out, predicting 'ships involving Ichijou Mikumo/Kay Faraday and her hologram-projecting cell phone "Nusumichan". You heard it here first.

• Ouch.
• This Troper, who has been messing around with various self imposed challenges in the DS remake of Final Fantasy IV, has begun to ship Kain/Phoenix augment. Dry Ether can come too.

• "Don't think of it as just another box. Treat it with love... Don't be rough. Okay?"
  • Not to mention the fanart of Naked Snake and... a Calorie Mate. With the Calorie Mate topping.
• This troper so ships EVA/Motorbike.
• Trailers for Metal Gear Solid: Peace Walker look to be making Snake/Box canon.

• Hinted? Near the end it almost hit Strangled by the Red String levels. In either case, Aegis is dateable in the Expansion Pack, Persona 3: FES.
• Let's not mince words. She asks him to touch her access port. She even offers to deactivate her limbs while it happens.

• Where the heck did that come from?
  • Probably the manga adaptations. The one for Chain of Memories was particularly heavy on the Rule of Funny.

  • Pffft, Xemnas/Kingdom Hearts is so canon it hurts. Xemnas does NOTHING but stand on top of that big damn building and reach out to the heart-moon in the sky, calling out its name, in almost every cutscene he's in. If that's not proof, this troper doesn't know what is.
  • Pshaw, that's NOTHING compared to Xehanort and his obvious door fetish. Seriously, when is the guy NOT talking about a door?
  • The other 99% of the time, he's talking about darkness. Seriously, this guy to all the distance with darkness. He even allowed himself to be enveloped by darkness as he left Hollow Bastion. Even one of the Princesses of Heart noticed his disturbed fetish with it.

• "Oh giant weaponised Key. I think you're the only one who really understands me" Maybe she and Ishtar could double date?

• Is it still a Cargo Ship if the item becomes a person? Because it really seems like the Master Sword is going to be human in the next game.

• Note, however, that (IIRC...) VIs are subject to Instant A.I.: Just Add Water!.
  • That's what they claim, but more likely that was just covering an illegal AI research.

  • Made even weirder that the wagon apparently got married and had children after it broke up with Strong Bad.

• Though sadly they got one of the genders wrong...
  • Oh, Squick! Waiter, I asked for tea with no cream.
  • GAH!
  • There was that time Iroh owned his own tea shop... "The secret ingredent.... is LOVE."

• 'Tonight, you pukes will sleep with your rifles. You will give your rifle a girl's name because this is the only pussy you people are going to get. Your days of finger-banging ol' Mary J. Rottencrotch through her pertty pink panties are over! You're married to this piece. This weapon of iron and wood. And you will be faithful. Port, hut!'

This troper will never be able to watch anyone ride it again without thinking the riders are giving it a free lap dance. By the way, "She claims to believe they share a fulfilling physical and spiritual relationship and does not get jealous when other people ride it." Lucky guy...?

• So wait, a guy can get married to a rollercoaster, but gay people can't marry each other?
• That's not what Rollercoaster Mine means...

• Your butt. The copy machine. They so want each other.

• Khazzid'hea ("Cutter") the sentient sword and Drizzt Do'Urden. Note that this is canonical, if only one-sided. Khazzid'hea desired to be wielded by the greatest warrior, and when Drizzt defeated its previous owner, was disappointed when he gave it to his friend Catti-brie, as he preferred the scimitar. It even took control of its wielder, Catti-brie, (with whom Drizzt had not inconsiderable sexual tension) and sent her to his room wearing a flimsy nightdress.
  • No one's said anything about Zhaodburns? Really?