Too Many Cooks Spoil The Multiverse: This Is (Not) A Joke

Zone One, The Everlasting Diet

"Fufufu..." the voice on the other side of the gap let out a breathy chuckle as the music faded to a quieter background noise. "Oh, please, don't stop yourself from relaxing on my account! This is purely a social call as someone who appreciates, shall we say... similar interests. I do have a motion to put forth that I will personally propose, and of course I'll be happy if you vote in favor, but I don't think I'll need to twist your arm to get you to do so. No, unless I've misjudged you, I think you'll quite like the idea..."

"And speaking of things you may like..." Another, larger gap opened, this time level with Mercer's middle, and a hand and part of an arm fitted with a long, white silk glove reached through, offering him a violet◊ concoction in a glass, complete with straw and purple sugar on the lip. "May I present: the Purple People-Eater! I find it quite delicious, and I hope you will as well!"

Then the debate over the various courses of action ensued, and by the time Myn ceded the floor a second time, something unusual had happened: Ran Yakumo stood up in order to speak, an exceptionally rare occurrence, since she usually sat silently and then voted yay or nay or abstained without further elaboration. "Friends, colleagues, Councilors of the Everlasting Diet," she began in her calm contralto, hands folded into her robes' huge sleeves, "On the matter of Darien Brand, House Yakumo concurs that, his having made threats to the person of a member of this body being crime enough, he should be arrested posthaste, and his resources taken under state control, as Robotnik's have been. As his enterprise seems mainly to be in the manufacture of magical artifacts, we suggest the responsibility for administering such be moved under the purview of Councilor Cassiopeia and her Convocation of Circles." The kitsune inclined her head at the green-haired First Farer, who nodded back with a smile.

"On the matter of the reconstruction of Zone Five, House Yakumo agrees with the idea in principle, but sees no reason why members of the Peacekeepers should be involved in overseeing such a project. If what has been said about the state of Peacekeeping in Zone Five is true, why would we place an institution so justly distrusted by the people of the Zone in charge of the Zone's reconstruction? That course of action would doubtless lead to yet more accusations and whispers of corruption within the populace, which runs entirely contrary to the goal of maintaining and improving the confidence of the people of Concordia in the judgement and actions of this body, a goal which Councilor Myn has correctly highlighted as paramount in importance. Thus, we will be voting against the measure unless the Peacekeepers are stripped out of the measure and replaced with individuals more likely to hold and increase the people's trust. We suggest that said persons be members of the Everlasting Diet, as a way of demonstrating that members of this body have invested their personal reputations in the endeavor's success."

"Lastly, on the matter of Guardian Theophilus Houraisan, House Yakumo observes that accountability for a subordinate's failings must start at the head: the head of the chain of command, the head of the family. As we see it, if Theophilus has any personal deficiencies, they must ultimately be the product of either nature or nurture, poor breeding or poor parenting. Surely, none here would question the nobility of the Houraisan bloodline, and so if he is corrupt or incompetent, it must be that he was raised improperly. We would hear Princess Kaguya's answer to this question: Whose responsibility is greater to ensure that a clan's next generation is raised properly to be competent and free of corruption than the clan's head?"

"Furthermore, it was the Peacekeeper General who chose Theophilus as a Guardian, yet now he claims Theophilus is corrupt or incompetent and unfit for his position. He claims that he and Guardian Witch have personally investigated and discovered that Theophilus has allowed his Peacekeepers to run rampant. He says that this is an internal Peacekeeper matter, and that only he has the right to appoint or remove Guardians. Perhaps that is true. However, House Yakumo says this: Why should we consider an internal Peacekeeper investigation plagued with self-interest to be sufficient? The Department of Internal Affairs' investigation is much preferable. In addition, how do we know, my fellow Councilors, that incompetence and corruption are not endemic in the Peacekeepers of other Zones? And finally, if the Peacekeeper General is responsible for the appointment of Theophilus Houraisan, and Theophilus is indeed incompetent or corrupt, how can we trust the Peacekeeper General's judgement in choosing Guardians at all? Perhaps the Diet has erred in delegating such a power in the first place."

"Therefore, I make the following motions, seconded and thirded by Councilor Yukari Yakumo and Councilor Chen: That the power to appoint and remove Guardians be returned from the Peacekeeper General back to the Diet as a whole; that the Diet create and fund an additional independent taskforce of impartial individuals within the Department of Internal Affairs for the purpose of conducting a fuller investigation, to include thorough oversight of all Peacekeeper departments, and presenting a complete report; that if this taskforce reports any incompetence or corruption within said departments, all involved Peacekeepers and their respective Guardians be dismissed with prejudice and stripped of all titles and honors, and that if any Guardian is also found to be personally incompetent or corrupt, the same consequences likewise fall upon the Peacekeeper General, as the one who appointed them. Accordingly, House Yakumo will also vote against increased funding for the Peacekeepers until such time as a full investigation of all Peacekeeper departments has concluded."

"With that said, I cede the floor," she concluded, retaking her seat and taking another sip of her tea, expression still implacably neutral.

Edited by darksidevoid on Sep 28th 2022 at 4:10:50 AM

Kayné Ainsel & Moloch "Moko" Kothys—Zone 5, Back Alley

Kayne is easily found by following the dwindling group of people lining up for checkups at her back alley stall, now only just wrapping up for the day due to the reduced office hours intended to aid in her recovery. There's jars of dried herbs, scales, and dozens of other old-timey pharmaceutical tools—even a mortar and pestle!—around her as she sees to her final patients of the day. Also evident are the mismatched medicines displayed behind her on the shelves, whatever she could manage to scrounge from other vendors and surplus from production.

She waves to V as he approaches, gesturing for him to come closer as her last patient leaves with tuned-up prosthetics. "Howdy, V. You don't look so hot," she observes, then chuckles, a little painfully, given the state she'd been left in after her beating. "But to be honest, neither do I. How can I help you today, pardner?"

Edited by JumpingFruit on Sep 29th 2022 at 5:18:19 AM

V gave a weak smirk. "Nah just catching me on an off day. Gimmie some time and I'll be preem again, choom."

Johnny was shooting V a look, raised his left hand and flexed the fingers. V's left hand started to flex as well, Johnny grinned, raised the hand and smacked V with it.

V stumbled a bit as his own left hand struck him. He regained his footing and looked back over. "Uh... I guess I need my cyberware checked out... and some pills made."

"If we can get something better than whatever Misty gave us, that'd be fantastic. Hell I'd go for some hard drugs right now."

"Shut up Johnny..."

"Just saying."

V stepped forward. "I've got... a problem and nobody back home could quite get it out, here my best bet is to put it on hold until it can be fixed."

Kayné Ainsel & Moloch "Moko" Kothys—Zone 5, Back Alley

"Well, just sit on down then, and I'll get to looking at you," Kayne said invitingly, pulling down her goggles, which whined to life, covering the lenses with a warm, opaque glow. They amplified the sunlight which was fused into her eyes, making it much easier for her to see things up close, when she usually had it the other way around, with her far-sightedness. She pointed to a curtained-off area within the stall, and once V sat down, she'd ask him to take off his shirt, hefting a toolbox onto view. "Right, before we get started, do you have a prior prescription, or the name of the drug you've heard before? I'm sure I'll be able to find something that suits your needs, unless it's something really niche and specific."

Edited by JumpingFruit on Sep 29th 2022 at 5:18:38 AM

Zima – Zone 5, Barovian Backdoor Special

“Tell me we have better music than this morose crap.”

The chosen booth’s curtain was drawn aside for a second time to admit Zima’s fur-lined presence, the ursus holding it open for a certain redhead who was just behind her.

“Hey, look at that. Suzie’s still alive.” She gave the big dumb lizard a thump on the shoulder, and then a bump to the fist, a smirk brightening her usual frown. “I thought kiryuin would have gotten rid of you by now.”

With little fanfare, she deposited her contribution to the night on the tabletop – a bottle of vodka recently liberated from the Backdoor’s cold storage, a cluster of shot glasses clinking into place around it. Seija’s spread got an approving nod as Zima sidled over to a free seat and, as the other three girls exchanged greetings, she decided to take the music situation into her own hands. Leaning forward towards the stereo, she pulled a rugged little red plastic music player from her pocket - scuffed and worn, controls marked in an unknown-to-most language - and plugged it into the input with the reverence usually reserved for crown jewels or ancient relics.

She was always quiet about its origins, but she’d broken the fingers on the last guy who’d tried to touch it.

Contrary to stereotypes, the speakers didn’t immediately blare the hardest of hardbass. Zima had hybridised her playlist with some local blood over the years. For instance, a trio of crustaceans from Pillar Three played a genre they called ‘Crunch’. It was loud, bass-heavy, and strangely melodic, and Zima thought it was pretty sick.

Ambience suitably corrected, she slouched back in her seat with a low sigh. Maybe it was just the lighting in the booth, but she sure looked like she had deeper shadows under her eyes than usual, something flitting under her resting-scowl as she watched over her friends settling in.

God, it was good to see them.

Edited by LittleMako on Sep 29th 2022 at 3:34:43 AM

Zone Six; Egress Eternal Private Rooms - Dio Brando

“Put yourself at ease, Blair. I believe you when you say you have no choice in this. I did not bring you here to judge you,” I said. No point to it, really. She’d already done that herself.

I'd known a little about her daughter - we all had, via the papers, and of the terrible besieged sincerity of a single mother facing down our monstrous city, no more attractive in the flesh, be assured - but I had not known she had so thoroughly slipped the leash. A certain pride there, I had assumed, some warm besotted tolerance for the noblesse oblige of rich young guilts. Alms for the poor, good and Christian. Optics, optics.

I had no inkling that she'd bred a little radical.

"But a woman like you prefers the colder truths, don't you? I believe six hours ago you were defeated soundly and quite publicly by a pair of bared breasts and a smooth little new money in an awful waistcoat," I said, "and I believe come press time you will find that this has consequence. You're right not to feel powerful, Blair. There's a certain honesty to admitting that. I find it quite convincing. You've had no agency in this from the beginning."

And you are between two strange men at an awful bar, I thought, broadcasting your concern for your poor beloved daughter, so sweet, so vulnerable, poor little thing. I have some puppies I could show her, if you'd like.

The wine was a thing of hate, and it was doing evil, petty, ugly things to me, but it was right. If this were Whitechapel, the Whitechapel of my youth, they'd have been pulling her out of the Thames for weeks. There is a certain class of human being, of particular upbringing, of particular status, that never learns the proper cautions; I'd but assume this is why fear, when at long last it made a visitation, had found in Blair Nightshade such fertile untilled ground.

"Which means, of course, that you can bear little blame for his actions," I said, smiling quite sincerely. "Whatever the man does, the city will know that it was not with your consent. Think about that. It should bring you comfort."

I put the wine down then, firmly, fingers over the base. I'd managed just over half the glass, and that I was willing to call victory.

"Now, this Maggie of yours," I said, "what's her inclination? If she's Marxist, then I can assure you that she won't be wanting for company. Or comrades. Not in Zone 5."

Edited by OG-Sama on Sep 29th 2022 at 9:41:10 AM

Crowe - Zone 5, 214th Street Cannery

Its probably gonna be a while until the next time he eats anything that comes from a can after today.

The taller man stepped back into the building, putting his radio away and carrying a metal case in one arm. He stepped with a lackadaisical sway to his gait, swinging his legs to make sure he didn't step in any mysterious red smears. No way to know what that came from and better for the mind to never find out.

Making his way over to the boss, he passed Cragsunder and gave her a wide berth as she ran to most likely vacate the premises and vacate her stomach. Couldn't really blame her. While Crowe was definitely off-put by the mess, he was clearly not reacting as strongly as everyone else present.

The pilot stepped up to Satsuki and reached into his coat, pulling out today's issue of the paper and offering it in case she wanted to look it over again. "Not a pretty sight ma'am, and from the sounds of things its not the only factory left like this. At least this one didn't catch on fire." He dryly joked to try and bring a little levity.

V took off the jacket and the samurai T-shirt. Kayne would get a good look at all the seamlines and cyberware points across V's body, V scratched a bit at the personal link around his neck. "The thing I was taking before was called Omega blockers, something like that, it helped silence a... problem."

V tilted his head to show off the personal link, stuck was what appeared to be the end to some USB sticking out of one of the slots. "I got this biochip, it's stuck and integrated itself in. I can't remove it without risking extensive brain damage at best."

Johnny appeared out of the corner of V's eye and was leaning against a wall. "Well gonk, we're stuck together. Better become best chooms quick."

V said nothing to Johnny, before continuing. "The Blockers helped slow down the effects of what this bugged out bioshard does. Defective product, slowly killing me, one day I'm gonna wake up but it won't be me behind the wheel anymore... and that's only one possibility, the other is that nobody wakes up."

Kayné Ainsel & Moloch "Moko" Kothys—Zone 5, Back Alley

"Sorry to hear that, pardner," Kayne says through clenched teeth as she checks up on V's mantis blades, reapplying lubricant to the joints and ensuring that the blades don't get caught when they're deploying or retracting. She takes the screwdriver from her mouth and checks that all screws are neither too tightened nor too loose, and applies an anti-rust coating strategically using a paintbrush before fanning at it to let it dry. As for all the other ports and jacks that V has, she cleans the dirt and dust out of them with small swabs on sticks. The process is simple and almost a routine at this point. "Alright, that's it for your implants. Anything deeper than that and you'll have to see a specialist. As always, don't forget to clean 'em and take care of the joints regularly—prolly heard your doctors say it a dozen times already, so I'll see about your medicine now. I think I got some in my lockbox. Go ahead and put your clothes back on while I get it out."

She puts her tools back into the toolbox she had hefted onto the counter next to the examination table and closes the lid. Then, she puts her prosthetic hand on top of it, which causes the box itself to vibrate while the strange runic carvings on the side light up. V might have his vision start to glitch out a little bit while there is a deep hum and a strange twisting in the air, then—

Kayne opens the toolbox, only it doesn't contain tools anymore. This time, it has strange crystals, glowing mushrooms, and oddly mutated plants stored in carefully labelled jars inside of it, alongside bottles of more conventional pills. She takes one of the bottles out to show V. "This is it, right? Do you recognize the packaging?" she asks him. "The expiry date seems fine, so it should be alright if you take it. If you want it, I'll also type you up a formal prescription so you can tell other doctors what you need just in case I'm not covering my shift for whatever reason."

Edited by JumpingFruit on Sep 29th 2022 at 6:26:59 AM

"Thanks choom," V said taking the bottle. "This is them alright, Omega Blockers."

He opened the bottle and popped out a pill, Johnny eying him all the way, giving him a look. V whispered "sorry" before swallowing it.

He blinked, Johnny was still there. That... that wasn't supposed to happen. Johnny stepped over to V, smoking a virtual cig. "Huh, that's weird... I can feel our minds touching still, but it's not getting any stronger."

V looked to Kayne, then back to Johnny. "I think it's working," he said.

"Here, let me try something," Johnny said. He gripped onto V, and pulled.

Kayne would see V seemingly flatline for a second... before his posture shifted... and a dark chuckle come out of his mouth.

"Thanks Choom, seems whatever is wrong with this fuckin' place is giving me a new lease."

Kayné Ainsel & Moloch "Moko" Kothys—Zone 5, Back Alley

Kayne tensed, fingers twitching, as V flatlined for a moment, then relaxed when she saw it was Johnny who took over and not anything more serious. "Glad to hear it," she said, relieved. "But don't think that just because you swapped out with your passenger that you're free from my medical jurisprudence, y'hear? Either of ya!" She shook her screwdriver at him jokingly and sat down to type up V/Johnny's prescription on an old portable typewriter after jiggling the lever to make sure it wasn't stuck.

"There should be a slight adjustment period for your body as it gets used to the new medicine," she advises him over the clickety-clack of her typewriter. "I don't know how different the batches in Concordia are from the ones you used to take, so if you start feeling discomfort, you should wean yourself onto it more carefully by taking half-doses for a few days so there's less of a shock to your system. After that, it should be fine."

"Here's your prescription, sonny," Kayne finishes, stamping a paper with her doctoral seal before handing it over to V/Johnny. "Scan a copy for yourself if you like, but you'll want to hang onto that paper. Most other sawbones in Zone 5 recognize my seal as legitimate. Might be clumsy, but if you run into someone else with implants, it's pretty obvious that they can't hack an analog piece of paper. Patient confidentiality, keeps us both safer, et cetera. You understand."

"It's the end of my shift and you're my last patient for the day," she told him while packing up her herbs and equipment. "And you've been pretty good about it so far. Here, have an apple. I forgot to hand them out earlier." She hurriedly put an apple on the counter before going back to packing.

Edited by JumpingFruit on Sep 30th 2022 at 11:38:51 AM

Zone Five; Barovian Backdoor Special, Special Barovian Backrooms - Asuka Langley Soryu

The music's bad and the lighting sucks even though they still have power, which I guess must just be the way that cops and vampires like it. There's a guy making this sort of wailing noise through the speakers about his girlfriend and the way she's in a coma, except I think it's meant to be sarcastic or something because he sounds a bit like he's pretending to be about to cry, maybe, but he doesn't much sound like he cares. He keeps singing about their arguments. They call this sort of stuff ironic. Shinji used to listen to it a lot when he was alive.

When we walked in I thought it was XTC again, but Zima made a face and told me it was someone called Morrisey, so I guess Peacekeepers like to listen to Morrissey. It feels like it's gotta be true, somehow. Guardian Witch and Violet out in Zone Six, even Kitsuragi, they all love to listen to music exactly like this. In every way. They can't get enough. That other blonde girl too. Guardian Witch loves to listen to Morrissey. She loves the way he sings through his nose. He's her favourite. It's just the way it is.

We pick up the vodka, or something like vodka, and the speakers roll over to Concordian Seaside Blues, which honestly fucking tracks. The bartender has a ruffled shirt and a choker with a vial of something red on it. It's that kind of place. I'm starting to understand why Zima doesn't like to talk about it.

The curtain to the private booth is black velvet, because of course it is, and behind it Seija's grinning at us like a shit eater, because that's how she grins, and Susie's chewing on something, because that's what she does. There's something awful on Seija's head and I know for a fact she did it on purpose, because there's something wrong with her brain, but Zima gets a lot of free stuff from her and I think most of it is laid out on the table in the middle of the cop bar, so I just say hi to the both of them and sit down. I've never seen this much of it in one place before and I'm pretty sure I'd rather die than let her and her hat know that.

She calls it her stock, I think, or sometimes her stonk for some reason, but I'm not sure it's a business if you never sell it. I'm sure I heard her say hoard once. Or something. It was a word like hoard.

Oh.

"Nice stash," I say, nodding cooly and putting my brand new boots up on the table, between the weed cigarettes and what I'm sure I heard Susie call a bong once. Zima steps over my legs with her SDAT player playing something with tinny bass and a lot of drums, which is great. I'd rather die than listen to XTC, too.

Just above Seija's head and Seija's awful hat there's a poster for something called the Supreme Guro Yuri Aesthetic. I'm not really sure how that would work, but the girl under the logo's wearing my old school uniform and winking at me over her intestines, all wrapped up into a big wet loveheart on the end of a big stupid boxcutter, so maybe that's how they do it. Her blush is bright pink, just like her blood, and I think she's meant to be blowing a kiss. It's that kind of place as well, I guess.

Zima's elbow brushes me as she sits, and it makes something hit my brain. I pat an empty pocket.

"Um," I say. "Someone did bring a lighter, right?"

There is no way in hell Seija owns a lighter.

"Susie?"

Edited by OG-Sama on Sep 30th 2022 at 7:26:10 PM

Johnny put on a pair of aviators, help differentiate who was in charge. "Hey adjustment is natural, having to wear his skin like this is a different story entirely."

Vincent appeared, sitting on the table, visible only to Johnny. "So this is what that's like, don't think Omega Blockers are supposed to work like this."

Johnny said nothing, especially after Kayne set down the apple. "Holy shit, is that real fruit?"

Vincent perked up. "Johnny if you were ever going to do something right for my body... Real fruit would be a major step forward."

Johnny picked it up, gave it a toss and bit into it. "Real fruit is practically a myth in NC. Harder to get than aquarium shrimp for stir fry."

Vincent let out a sigh. "And neither you nor I got the eddies for stuff like that."

Johnny nodded. "Speaking of... know any jobs coming up? V and I need some cash and we're a bit strapped."

Kayné Ainsel & Moloch "Moko" Kothys—Zone 5, Back Alley

"Real fruit is what in NC?" Kayne asked, perplexed. She shakes her head, dismissing the errant thought, before continuing. "Well, seeing as Zone 7 is in need of some help right now, and most officials in the City don't want to have anything to do with it, maybe you could come help out, see a few sights along the way, and all that."

"There's this big monster that's come in from the Incoherence, and I've got my Rangers keeping an eye on it," she explained, spreading her hands before putting one of them on her hip. "The Peacekeepers aren't woods-wise enough to head all the way to the outskirts, which means we're strapped for personnel in the wake of Eggman pitching a hissy fit and wrecking all his products. The Peacekeeper General is concerned that the City might be invaded in the future, which, okay, fair, so he's also going to be joining us on the hunt, but more hands on deck when hunting is always good. You never know what's going to happen."

"I'd understand if wilderness isn't your thing," Kayne finished, tapping her fingers lightly on the counter. "But I'm sure the Arborwatch can scrape together enough credits to pay you, and if nothing else, Zone 7 has more fresh food than you can shake a stick at if you decide to come along. So how's about it?"

Edited by JumpingFruit on Oct 1st 2022 at 9:13:43 AM

Areum, Zone 1, Diet Chambers

As I listened to Ran, I really had to think this over.

…

Yeah, I have to do this. I don’t want to, but I think I have to.

“...I’m amenable to Councilor Yakumo’s proposal of a thorough investigation of all Peacekeeper departments within the city, and swift punishment delivered to all who are found guilty of corruption or unjust brutality. As long as it is done above board, without keeping anyone in the dark, I see little reason to object. Theo provides as good an incentive as any to take decisive action - and should conclusively prove this is not a political move on my part. Now As far as the reconstruction of Zone 5 is concerned, I’m similarly open to which parties head the project. I expect the actual work will be done by outside third parties regardless, so if it is collectively decided that responsibility should fall upon selected members of the Diet, I see no reason to object.“

I am genuinely sorry, Witch and Swain. Your career prospects may very well be harmed if Yakumo’s proposal goes through, I know that. But the reality is that I cannot afford to act in a way that is obviously biased in your favor. I must govern as someone who is willing to make compromises when necessary. Not just for my reputation, but also because we simply do not have the numbers in the Diet for me to raise hard objections to… well, most things at this point.

“Lastly, the Darien issue. I would like to find out exactly what he has been up to within this city - what he has done, who his accomplices are, everything. The full extent of that is still very much unclear, and that information will be key to keeping the people of this city safe. After that, may he be dealt with swiftly and appropriately. I cede the floor.”

Ancat, Diet, Zone 1,

‘Who the hell is Ancat? How am I expected to keep track of all these names? You’re telling me a shrimp fried that rice?’

These are some of the questions you’re probably thinking right now. Don’t worry, complete bewilderment is exactly what you should be feeling when dealing with matters pertaining to every member of Concordia’s Diet.

Anarcho Caticalist, better known as Ancat, is a cryptid - he generally takes the form of an unassuming catboy, but his true form is closer to some sort of catlike monstrosity with unknown powers. All that’s really known is that he who was born with a bone deep love for capitalism, and a seething hatred of communism - whatever those words even mean to him. The only other thing that’s known about him is that he has been the CEO of more companies than most people can make, has loadsamoney, and has continued making in Concordia through STONKS and other weird financial shit that doesn’t make any sense to the average person and doesn’t actually seems to be contributing to the wellbeing of Concordia overall. But he does have money, and that was all he needed to get on the Diet.

And yet in spite of all this, of course he has blue hair and pronouns. He’s a Microsoft Gold Certified twink. You cannot punch his punchable face, because that’d probably be a hate crime. Also he’s uh… 6’9” tall because that’s the funny number.

Our very special new guy who has been here all along begins his speech.

“Ladies and gentlemen of the Diet, I thank you all for your wise words. As far as the matter of Theo Houraisan goes... now frankly, I have no quarrel with him as a person. But that doesn’t matter - his personality isn’t on trial here. His performance is, and - again, as Councilor Myn has helpfully pointed out, he has a laundry list of offenses that cannot be forgiven. Others have already spoken their minds about this, and I see no need to repeat their points.”

He paces around the room, as he often does. Every councilor has their tics.

“And I also believe Councilor Yakumo presents a very solid proposal as well. I thank you both for your contributions. However! Even if we follow through with her plan, I will not be voting for a budget increase for the Peacekeepers. You have to understand, Councilor Swain and Guardian Witch, the difficult position we’re in. Eggman’s factory just kaput, and Darien, the other would-be captain of industry… well, do I really need to say very much about him? Forget paying his taxes - he’s probably going to be in a cell pretty soon. What I’m getting at is these captains of industry are where a good portion of our tax base comes from, and I’m frankly not sure it’s going to be feasible to pay for a budget increase for our law enforcement during these uncertain economic times. Perhaps the economy will recover soon - but perhaps it won’t. That is the problem we’ll have to deal with. So here’s what I’ll say… let’s wait a while - maybe a month or two - and see where the economy is. Purrrrhaps, if things have settled in the wake of Eggman’s fall, and the Diet’s budget is fully solvent, we should indeed go ahead with Councilor Swain’s proposal. But until then my votes are - fire Theo, fund the relief efforts, go ahead with Councilor Yakumo’s plan, don’t increase the Peacekeeper budget just yet, and send Darien to the doghouse. By which I mean prison. Not literally - well, you know.”

Ancat then munches on an Ancat branded tuna candy bar.

You don’t know why tuna candy bars are a thing that exist, and you don’t want to.

Edited by HilarityEnsues on Oct 1st 2022 at 9:32:55 AM

Johnny looked to Vincent. "Johnny we need the eddies, chrome like ours costs money."

"We'll do it," Johnny said, standing up. "When is it happening?"

Kayné Ainsel & Moloch "Moko" Kothys—Zone 5, Back Alley

"Few days to a couple of weeks at most," Kayne says, slinging her messenger bag onto her shoulders and lifting her toolbox off the counter. "But honestly, I don't think it will take that long. I'll send a raven when it's time. Of course, you could always come to Zone 7 before then, see how you like being a ranch hand. The cattle out there always need defending from small fry beasts. Or at least, what counts for small fry out there."

"Well, if that's everything, be seeing you two," she finished, giving a wave to the gestalt Johnny/V before turning to leave. "Take care, y'hear?"

Edited by JumpingFruit on Oct 4th 2022 at 10:49:14 AM

How quick Swain is to swat away at Kaguya's concerns. Shoo, perfectly manicured fly. The whine of your wings shouldn't be here.

She held her tongue. Waiting in her nearly rock-still quiet, but not yet returning to a lounging position at the seat behind her, she waited for him to finish: all of the work his Peacekeepers could have prepared in this time to cut out the cancer that is Brand wouldn't be enough, Swain had put a blanket on the fire that Kaguya had just lit, and his concerns seemed to stop and end at funding. Nothing is new. No time at all has passed since the day this place came into being. The Houraisan household funds still were being pecked at by fat crows...

With his plea for her money put aside, one of his secondaries was quick to add in her own. She recognized that woman and her pale skin, the unseemly air about her that she covered up with the perfume of the lawman, but she always felt that her time would be better spent elsewhere. Such was the way of so many of these lawmen. Still, at least she was quick in her words. Something about her, once again nagging to pull her away from the pistol and the belt, made it seem like she was the only person in the room who didn't gild every single word or add frills to every request. Kaguya remained standing.

Then, Areum. A simple repeat of the same dissection of the Peacekeepers' corpse. Kaguya's gaze pulls away from her and her offensively bright existence, the joppa and the bubblegum brilliance that only seems to make everything serious out of her mouth seem like a caricature of a real politician. All ill will toward her was simply out of a sense of elegance, but she still resented her for that...

...and then, of course, one other matter.

Kaguya's eyes slowly grinded against the grain of the Diet chamber.

Dozens of men in suits, ladies in refined clothes, godlings and machines and a menagerie that'd seem fantastic even to the people of the Moon. Among them, many were her own. Whether they retained the familial traits that seemed unmistakable in Houraisans, she could, similarly, feel her gaze being met by many of them before her eyes locked onto Areum.

The last time she had ever truly met Theophilus, he was 12. He pulled a branch off of a tree in her courtyard, and no matter the beating he was due to receive from his parents over it, Kaguya assured her that it was fine. Sticks will heal, grow back. Memories are not created without a little spent. Here he was now; not in the room, but hanging over her like so. Kaguya should have let him be beaten if he was going to be a pain in the ass like this.

Her eyes did go from Areum to others in the room as the conversation drifted, mostly Greguya's pig-snorting in his defense of his cousin twenty-times removed, but her expression was now wholly inscrutable and neutral. Not the usual smug condescension, nor the serene plea. Her hands were folded together under her voluminous sleeves. In the end, she found herself looking at Swain as he gave one final barb in her direction.

The plan was always there, and what are the odds, it reminded Kaguya of advice she gave some young descendants of hers in raising their child decades ago. A doctor can do it just fine, but a bothersome tooth sometimes just needs to be removed post-haste. To do this, tie a cord 'round it, then around a western-style door handle. Then, close. Let the bleeding heal on its own.

To a certain fox-shaped computer, she responded first: "I believe it is the responsibility of whoever trained the dog, when it bites. The family, and the keepers."

"Theophilus Houraisan has failed Concordia in its entirety. I express that he should be removed from his post and gravely punished for his trespass - a pain that will rest heavy on the shoulders of the House of Hourai. I leave it to Swain to see that he is made an example of. I cede the floor."

She spoke bluntly and concisely. She returned to her seat, feeling the eyes of the Houraisans on her back even harder than before, and then sat back down. Her handmaiden, always polite and silent like a handmaiden should be, couldn't help but roll a little to whisper to her conspiratorially: "My lady, I am taken aback."

"I hope you were not fond of him," Kaguya replied.

"He is my brother."

"Then forgive my unthoughtful speech."

"No, he was a pain...in the rear, my lady. I don't mind."

Kaguya chuckled.

"Well, look who it is. Goddamn Sexual Tyrannosaurus."

Seija got tickets to see someone's copy of Predator on a salvaged portable DVD player a couple days ago, by the way. Just throwing that out there.

Not yet much affected, she held open her arms in a way that could be misconstrued as a way to initiate a friendly hug, but luckily/sadly Susie just started eating instead of resolving it. Her eyes traveled back upward for a moment as she let her sleeves sag back down to the seat.

The Kijin-recipe Weed Mochi wasn't of great tasting quality, but who honestly cared about that? It'd take a bit, but that particular one would eventually hit hard. The feeling of someone dragging you into a back alley so you're less liable to make noise when you get kicked in the head with wooden sandals. That hard.

Zima's arrival, and That One Girl Who Always Seems To Have Some Kind of—oh Seija's just pulling your leg, it's Asuka! A name much easier to remember than the weird foreign names that hang on this city like flies on the wall. Their arrival, she didn't go to raise her arms or do much more than reciprocate a fist or whatever was sent her way, not repeating her entirely hidden faux pas. A change of music - Seija didn't mind it, but she kind of hated music in general anyway, so it was ultimately neutral. She had an inkling that people used computers to make music, wherever Zima came from.

To Asuka's left side, she'd hear a click. Then a second click and a third and fourth, because Seija likes the noise her lighter makes. HER lighter. How is Oscar going to ever recover?

She stole it from a dead guy and didn't need the money.

"So, like," Seija began, raising her voice a bit over the noise of the strumming bass in the background, "shit's been going down lately, right? Really down."

She would've taken a slow drag to accompany the gravitas of what she said, but she hadn't actually lit anything herself yet, so she just ate some mochi instead. "You figure we're going to be able to do this together much longer?"

Edited by wikkit on Oct 2nd 2022 at 4:54:59 AM

Zone One - Everlasting Diet - Swain

Unsurprisingly, Kaguya lets the matter rest. Swain hadn't expected her to raise a complaint; it was obvious that she didn't actually care for her family beyond the political capital they could bring her. Defending Theophilus would have been pointless, and she was well aware of that.

It makes it easier to focus on the task at hand. He takes a deep breath to steady himself as he prepares his rebuttal.

“You are correct in one thing: I have failed in my diligence. I should have investigated Zone Five long before now. But as I believe I mentioned, many reports from Zone Five were falsified to downplay the corruption and violence occurring. I am but one man, overseeing the policing of an entire city. It was inevitable that someone would eventually find a way to deceive me. For this failure, I truly apologize. I will accept any investigation the Diet wishes to undertake, and face any punishment you deem necessary.”

Their investigations wouldn't find anything, of course. He didn't know what they expected to find, but if they thought Swain was foolish enough to leave any evidence of his more objectionable actions, then they were stupider than he realized. And besides which, he doubted Yakumo's proposition would gain traction, even without his counterargument - Swain was himself a member of the Diet, and attempting to so boldly undercut his power base was such a blatant political maneuver that it might well trigger a civil war if it went through.

He makes a point to look Yakumo in the eye as he continues. “However. With all due respect, Councilor Yakumo, I would urge you to think through your logic before speaking. It is true that I approved Theophilus for the position. But it was the House of Houraisan who suggested him to me as a candidate, and who assured me of his competency. Furthermore, though the placement of Guardians is a power reserved to the Peacekeeper General, it was the Everlasting Diet which granted that power in the first place, and which allowed me to take this position.”

“If you are so certain that the punishment for failure must start at the head, as you so eloquently put it, then there is no reason to stop with myself. I am but a humble servant of this Everlasting Diet, and I operate only at their whim."

Swain makes a sweeping gesture, spreading his hands to encompass the whole room. "If you truly believe that I should be stripped of rank for the failings of the Guardian I appointed, then surely you must believe that those Diet members who accepted my appointment as Peacekeeper General should also be stripped of their position, for my failing in accepting him.”

He lowers his arms. "It should be obvious that such a position would be indefensible. Therefore, I strongly advise the Diet against Councilor Yakumo's radical proposition. I warn you once more that the stirrings of revolution are beginning. Weakening the Peacekeepers now would only worsen them."

"You're useless." Swain hadn't ceded the floor, but a voice cut in regardless. Poseidon lounged on a chair stylized with two crossed tridents, and his blue eyes were as frigid as the depths as he glared at nothing in particular. "We are perfect beings. We are the gods of this realm. We do not need the support of the people. If they attack us, I will crush them."

An expected response from the ocean's tyrant. Swain nonetheless found the overconfidence quite annoying.

"There are no true immortals, Councilor Poseidon. Strong as you may be - as all of us may be - even we can be killed. And our strength means nothing if there is no one to rule." There was a surprising sincerity to these words. Swain was well aware of his own mortality, and of how fragile the world could be. "I cede the floor."

"Damn straight." I grin back at Seija. I don't know what she's referencing, but it sounds cool. Dinosaurs are cool.

Soon the gang's all here, and I have to stop my tail from wagging, before someone compares me to a dog.

"Hah!" I fist bump with Zima, then return her shoulder thump. "Satsuki couldn't get rid of me if she tried."

Zima's got great taste in music. I don't know what genre it is, but I like the bass. I'm already tapping my foot, wondering how fast that cake is supposed to kick in, when Asuka asks about a light.

While Seija clicks her lighter on, I raise up a thumb, focus a little, and a tiny purple flame crackles to life on my clawtip. "I still need practice my fire magic more, but I can do a light. I figure if I can learn to breathe fire, Seija can save money on molotovs."

It's a joke, but also I'd totally do arson with Seija. As long as the place deserved it. Maybe we could set Areum's house on fire sometime. Or that moon bitch who's name I can never pronounce.

I'm halfway through figuring out how to work the hookah when Seija starts talking current events. I give her a genuine smile. "I'm sure we will. It'll take more than this shithole city to kill any of us, yeah?"

Edited by kagescorpionakki on Oct 2nd 2022 at 9:34:21 AM

Hiroki, Zone 5, 214th Street Cannery

I’m trying not to beat myself too much over what happened to Witch. She’s going to be fine, and she’s not the type to hold grudges against me, so there’s little reason to. I’m also trying not to think about where Concordia is right now, which is admittedly more difficult.

The Diet is an autocracy that is either unwilling or actually incapable of performing even the basic functions one would expect of a government. Zones 5 and 6, where most people live, are terrible places to live in, and 5 literally just had a gang war that left dead people lying in the street for god knows how long because the Peacekeepers were unwilling to do their jobs. Eggman has destroyed a good portion of our technological infrastructure, and the only man who seems willing and able to step up to the plate to replace it - Darien Brand - appears to be a very dangerous man in his own right. Lastly, Kayne was assaulted in her own home by the Peacekeepers as well, which makes it increasingly difficult to not view Witch as merely ‘one of the good ones’ in a way that would almost certainly sound incredibly condescending should such a phrase ever leave my lips. But it is true, though, I do think of her like that. Because most of her peers are decidedly not good, and I can’t pretend that’s not the case anymore. In short… there really doesn’t seem to be much to be hopeful about right now.

It is at this moment that I have an incredibly dark passing thought.

Life would’ve been much, much easier had I remained with the Sunrise Empire - or Imperial Japan, as they were once known. I don’t think I would’ve ended up in Concordia had I not become a turncoat. I’d probably be living some very cushy existence in Tokyo after my service instead of fighting desperately to try to move the needle towards justice in some spaceship that doesn’t seem to have much of that.

…I would also have to do - or at the very least, turn a blind eye to - a vast array of unspeakable crimes. Japan’s genocidal actions in China alone are bone-chilling acts of depravity - that’s merely the most well-known atrocity they’ve committed - and I could surely never be forgiven had I sanctioned any number of the crimes against humanity they’ve committed across Asia. So of course, that was never an option I could’ve seriously considered.

Still, it remains true that I am desperate for normalcy, and I don’t know how far I’d go to get it. What I do think I know, at this point, is I’ll likely never find that here. I believe Satsuki and others are pushing for Concordia to become something better, but they are constrained in the quality of the house they can build on such a cursed foundation. As much as I treasure the time I have spent with the militia, with Witch, with Kayne, the reality is that at times I don’t know if my heart is really in it for this city anymore. I truly do not like it here. This parade of misfortune and despair can only go on for so long before my heart hardens and I simply start going through the motions, no longer invested in what happens. That doesn’t exactly paint me in the best light, but it’s true. I’m sorry, but there is a limit to how much I can continue to process when I’m dealing with my own struggles.

I push this aside for now. Satsuki said needs help with something - cleaning up the refuse from Eggman’s defunct machines, I believe? And so eventually I find her, along with Crowe - and a dead animal, it looks like. Eggman’s animal cruelty is ultimately a secondary concern compared to what effect his actions will have on people, but it still shows remarkable cruelty and a lack of imagination that he chose to make his products run on animal labor of all things.

“Damn…”

I scowled at this display, wondering how many other dead critters must be scattered over this city by now.

“So how much do you imagine this is going to effect the Shrine Well, Commander? Admittedly, I hadn’t really thought about how much egg tech we were or weren’t using until just now.”

Edited by HilarityEnsues on Oct 2nd 2022 at 8:11:18 AM

Zone Five, Barovian Backdoor - Girls' Night

Just as Susie was assuring her friends that everything would be alright, a beaming albino woman who looked to be in her early twenties pulled aside the curtain one more time. She had messy white, green-highlighted hair to her shoulders, and was decked out in black cargo shorts, along with a tight-fitting, Kelley-green tee-shirt that read, in white block ship-speak letters stretched across the chest:

I left my other
shirt in the
I̸̻̦̽̿̏n̵̢̲͛͛c̷̹̥̠̓̈́o̶͎̬̒̈̍h̸̺̀̅e̸̤̠̽ȓ̶̼̟̘̕̚e̷͓̫͑͛n̴̘͚̦͊̕c̵̠̖̮̆͝e̶̫͇̝͆̽

Below that in the middle of the shirt was the Draughtsmen's emblem◊, with the orange replaced with green, presumably to avoid clashing.

She was also wearing an absolutely stupid-looking green hat.

"Hey Zima! Hey Seija!" she greeted, eyes practically sparkling. "Hey Zima and Seija's friends, I'm Prushka! I met those two earlier, and they told me I should come hang out, so... here I am! Looks like you got a pretty nice setup here! This where the party's at, or what?"

This upbeat weirdo wouldn't take a seat until one of the other gals was kind enough to move over a little to give her enough space, but in the meantime she tapped out the beat of Zima's crustacean-sourced music on her thigh, smiling all the while.

Edited by darksidevoid on Oct 3rd 2022 at 7:57:00 AM

Zone One; The Everlasting Diet, Diet Chamber - Myn

And so it has come to pass that the Houraisan matriarch has, for the first time, rescinded protection from one of her own family. So great are his failings that they have broken Diet precedent with their magnitude. Myn has often chosen to place his trust in Kaguya's political acumen, voting in lock-step with her on the majority of occasions. This maneuver of hers, callous as it is, will be no different, and only strengthens his belief in her wisdom.

Children and family are to be treasured and nurtured; on this, he has always believed they agree. To recognize when a child is beyond salvation is a difficult and terrible thing, beyond the fortitude of most parents. Until today, Myn believed Kaguya might also lack the fortitude to enact whatever means are necessary to salvage Concordia, and he is immensely pleased to have been wrong.

There is nothing more radiant than a woman who is his political and intellectual equal; two has he met, in all his years. With great guilt, he forces himself to harden his heart to his wife's memory. He cannot reach her, and she has surely forgotten him in every way that matters. And if she has not, then what would she think of him for the adultery in his heart?

"Honorable Peacekeeper General," Myn begins, pivoting slowly so that both Swain and Ran are in his field of vision, "I would remind you of where we stand today. We are all equals here, and despite some distasteful language having previously made its way into this chamber from others, it is crucial that we all remain civil and respectful to one another, particularly in tone. You are not on trial, though you are correct in your assertion that you are speaking to those who approved your position to begin with."

Myn pauses to allow himself a moment of consideration. When he begins again, his voice is newly softened, still loud enough for the assembled councilors to hear, but focused and didactic.

"Your role is, first and foremost, as an equal member of the Diet, to whom the position of Peacekeeper General was delegated. Nothing was forced upon you. You were entrusted with the position because you expressed that you were the best man for the job. I do not believe this was incorrect, but I do not speak for all who are assembled, and if I may be so bold, Peacekeeper General, telling your employer where he can stick his complaints is rarely a winning strategy."

He turns from Swain, back to the gathered Councilors. No plan survives contact with political fellows, but Myn believes he has properly accounted for what has transpired. Hopefully all he needs is to push once more.

"If it pleases the Diet, I would offer a caveat regarding the Peacekeepers: I fully agree that great change is needed. So malignant is its current state that the ousting of the criminal Greed from power has effectively caused an entire Zone's worth of law enforcement to lose its way. Think for a minute on how many Peacekeepers that is. It is a sobering thought for myself as well.

"However, I can say with full confidence that Guardian Witch is not counted among that shameful number. I make it a priority to keep myself well-informed of what transpires in Concordia. Zone Six is not perfect. However, considering the hand she has been dealt, the work she has done is astounding. Let it not be forgotten that she was the one who spearheaded the operation to oust Greed, it was her precinct which solved the rash of 'Toolbox Killings' and dealt with the perpetrator, and I believe she is sincere in her desire to restore Zone Five to order, stability, and safety.

"If the Diet is against the Peacekeepers' involvement as an organization, you have good reason. However, I believe it would be a mistake to not place Guardian Witch in a leadership role in this endeavor, even if she were to lead in an unofficial capacity. I can think of no one else with both the desire to get this done and the capability to get this done right who is also well-trusted in her community, and for good reason.

"In addition, I agree that thorough investigations of both Darien Brand's actions in Concordia and the full extent of the Peacekeepers' corruption should be high priorities. The Ministry of Internal Affairs will gladly open both investigations immediately, following Diet approval. Assuming there are no objections to this arrangement, Councilors Yakumo and Areum's conditions are acceptable in all other respects. I cede the floor."

With that, Myn finally retakes his seat. Now all that's left is to see how the votes play out.

Alex Mercer - Zone One - Diet Chambers

"Well, well, well," you said, "first you had my curiosity, but now you've got my attention." Yukari's gift of liquor earned her a simple but earnest "Thanks." You took a sip, perking up as Ran-the-many-tailed stood to speak, further increasing the tally of the day's rare occurrences. Today had already been plenty interesting before Eggman blew up most of his own shit. As the fox girl spoke, you did your best to keep the grin from creeping further and wrapping around the back of your head. You came here knowing you'd get to witness some chaos, and your fellow Diet members had absolutely delivered. Who knew that old bat Kaguya had it in her to toss her kin to the wolves like that? It nearly brought a tear to your eye.

Unsurprisingly, your old reliable friend Myn stepped in to once again guide things in a productive direction. The proposed Peacekeeper reforms were surprise enough, yet alone the elf supporting Guardian Witch heading the rebuilding project. You supposed it made sense in some way. She was always going on about her "code" and going out of her way to do more than just uphold the law and round up criminals. There was no doubt passion to spare in that unbeating heart of hers, and despite her potential for violence she was unequivocally one of the least lethal in the entire force. Myn never was one for flippant word or action, there was probably something to this worth chasing.

You were about to stand up to speak, but you saw the Right Honorable Lady Guardian Stick-Up-Her-Ass had beat you to it. Instead, you turned your head slightly to whisper back to the devil on your shoulder. "Yukari, babe, I think I owe you dinner after that show."

Witch - Zone One - Diet Chambers

More comments, some support, some dissent. A general lack of coherent plans put forward in opposition. That is, until Ran spoke up on behalf of House Yakumo. You were absolutely certain your blood would be boiling if you weren't dead. She was so very close to making several important points, and yet as expected of the Diet failed to maintain a proper semblance of legitimacy. You could hear Lady Yukari giggling to herself through one of her portals, handing Councilor Mercer a drink. Evidently they thought themselves quite clever. They were still part of the problem until they stepped forward to see to things otherwise.

What was remarkably surprising, however, was Lady Kaguya's open censure of her own kin. It was, to your knowledge, completely unprecedented. You briefly raised an eyebrow before returning your expression to its previous collected state. This was no cause for celebration, despite the guarantee of Theophilus' removal from his station. Kaguya's actions ensured something was amiss. She was planning something, of this there was no doubt. But that was a problem for later. The meeting was not yet over.

The Diet had become fixated on the matter of the Peacekeepers and Theophilus when that was less than half of what you had come here to discuss. Typical political infighting. Fortunately, amidst the chaos and discord Myn stepped forward to correct course. He was occasionally extremely useful in spite of the amount of blood on his hands, and it only made you detest him all the more.

"Thank you for your praise, Councilor," you said, standing as Myn yielded the floor and took his seat. "Your concerns are warranted, all of you. Greed's departure has exposed without a shadow of a doubt that the Peacekeepers require significant reform. However, I do not stand here before you seeking to advance my own station or lessen that of others. I am not here acting as a member of the Peacekeepers, but as a considerate advisor. It is my sworn duty as a paladin to see to the well-being of the citizenry. Should it be deemed necessary for the sanctity of the proposed rebuilding operations, I am amenable to suspending my operations as a Peacekeeper to assist in overseeing its success, although I suspect that such a course will leave my fellow Guardians crucially short-handed in these trying times. The situation in Zone Five is far more complex than can be summarized in a brief report, and while I wholly believe that an outside team lacking direct connection to Zone Five would eventually succeed, time is of the essence. We must act as quickly as possible to remedy this situation before tensions are allowed or instigated to rise further."

Years of practiced doublespeak did nothing to dull the rage that burned in your chest. You could count the number of people present who were fit to lead on two hands, and yet unfailingly they sought to feign wisdom and act as though they were beyond qualified to mandate the lives of others.

You took a deep breath. You still needed them. You just needed to keep the mask long enough to make it through this meeting, and then you could let off steam later, away from prying eyes.

"I have spoken with several private individuals with connections to Zones Five and Six who have already pledged support, and their ideas helped to form the proposed plan of action. Many within Zone Five are either homeless or unemployed, if not both. By coordinating and prioritizing efforts to utilize the skills of those already living in the Outer Zones, we kill two birds with one stone by providing them with work and, eventually by their own hands, proper lodging as well. This approach will also allow us to assuage the concerns of those disinclined to trust the Diet, of which there have been growing rumblings. There will not be a team of outsiders swooping in to upend their lives, they will be working together with their fellow man to improve their situation themselves. This should show them that we not only have their best interests in mind, but that we are aware of and understand their problems."

Of course, there was another problem that waited after, one that you doubted the Diet would ever come to an agreement on. Once the factories were operational again and the people once again had stable rooves over their heads, there would be the matter of ensuring that the situation was not allowed to deteriorate to such a state anew. This would require long-term support, and if the Diet was capable of considering the long-term well-being of anyone other than themselves things would've never reached this state in the first place.

"Thank you," you said. "I cede the floor."

As you sat down, you heard someone begin to slowly clap.

Alex Mercer - Zone One - Diet Chambers

"Gotta admit," you said, standing up as you clapped, grinning ear to ear, "Wasn't expecting that turn of events. But I'm not here to waste time, so I'll jump right on and weigh in."

"Sure, root out the bad apples, sounds like it's long overdue at this point, yeah? Since the Peacekeepers are about to find themselves short-staffed, the current budget should work until the investigation is finished and our remaining good eggs are able to recruit to fill the empty positions, don't you think? After that point it sounds like the training program needs to be updated, and that'll take some work, so sure, why not, more money. Maybe teach the greenies to ask questions before shooting, huh?"

Swain was resourceful, but you knew the Peacekeepers didn't actually need the money right now, not with as many of them as were about to get cut loose. All that pension money was about to get injected back into the system, which meant more funding without explicitly being given it. What they needed was an image update so maybe the folks outside the Inner Zones wouldn't get twitchy when they heard the Peeks coming, and better training so the Peeks wouldn't be so twitchy about people on the street.

"As for rebuilding, I've had the opportunity to take a stroll through Zones Five and Six recently, and lemme tell you, shit's rough. It's been brought to my attention that some of the clinics in the outer reaches aren't getting the support they need, either. I'm throwing my support in with rebuilding, at Myn's request with our good Lady Guardian on board, as well as investing the Department of Public Health into shoring up the medical facilities throughout the city, but especially in the Outer Zones. There's enough tech and taxes flowing nowadays despite Robotnik's little stunt that Joe Shmoe shouldn't need to worry about medical expenses for common problems. I'll oversee Public Health working with the Department of Revenue to see about making that happen. After all, if we've got people getting crippled or dying from stuff we can easily save them from, they're not bringing in taxes, now are they? Sounds like a pretty simple win-win to me."

You waved your hand in a dramatic bow and said "I cede the floor," scooping up the drink left on the table and taking another sip as you did so.

Areum, Diet, Zone 1

There is something melancholic as Kaguya’s eyes meet mine. At times, in my own mind, I have scorned her. Scorned her for her conniving ways, and her transparent desire to control this city on her own. It is easy to do so when she isn’t here, when she appears to be in the role of some shadow puppet master. But for some reason, it’s not quite the same with her actually present. The simple fact that she is here and I can see her does actually humanize her, as strange as it is for something that inconsequential to be important. I’m reminded that there was a time where, although there was certainly a personality and cultural clash between us (one that I’m honestly not sure would exist to nearly such a degree anymore, now that I have given up on trying to live in my idol persona at all times), I do think we were… probably friends. We’ve known each other for 147 years. I do think, on some level, that had to mean something. But our tenure in the Diet does probably mean that it means less than it could’ve. And whatever else I may think, that is genuinely sad.

The fact that she gave Theo the boot so easily is both surprising, but also not. It’s not something she does particularly often, but the breadth of Theo’s failure and his obvious incompetence means that making moves to protect him could’ve possibly united the members of the Diet who aren’t usually in her corner anyways - and maybe even a few that are - against her. She’d be poking a beehive for essentially no real reason. I expect she’s going to ask for something in return - nobody ever does anything for free here. We’ll cross that bridge when we get to it, though.

Swain has, in all likelihood, lost. With my contingency, along with Myn’s, Mercer’s and in all likelihood the vast majority of the Houraisans, he will almost certainly not be able to muster the votes to get his way. To be frank, it may be better that way. I agree with him that more needs to be done to show some sort of tangible goodwill for the citizenry to grab onto, lest they become restless, but… i really think he’s letting his bias show when he immediately jumps to “and that means giving the Peacekeepers more money”. To be frank, most of Concordia probably wouldn’t want more money going to the peeks if we actually polled them on anything. They see them as oppressors, as people that cause problems rather than solve them. They want better jobs, they want their broken communities rebuilt, they want Zones 5 and 6 to be places where people can thrive, rather than just survive. I think you’re intelligent and that you always bring reasoned arguments whenever we hold these meetings, but I also think you wield nothing but a hammer while you’re surrounded by nails.

Also… I don’t even really like to acknowledge him too much - libertarianism is probably the worst American export, I swear - but Ancat’s point that we might not even have the money to keep upping the Peacekeeper budget over and over again anymore considering the current state of the economy might actually have some merit to it, in spite of the fact that he’s obviously not a neutral party at all. There’s going to be a huge hole in the economy that Eggman left after his capture. There is no other city from which we can borrow money from, typically the solution most sovereign governments turn to in scenarios where they need additional funds. We can try to start nationalizing as many industries as we can and use the profits from that to stay solvent, but frankly I don’t know how that’s going to shake out with the current brain trust we have right now. God only knows at this point, but frankly I’m not looking forward to putting that to the test during such a stressful time.

Myn gives his piece, offering his support for Witch. Frankly I’m relieved, because the fact that he keeps agreeing with me means I can’t really be accused of making some sort of personal power play with any of the things I support. Whatever I can say about him - which encompasses a lot - I do have to admit, at times like this, that having him on the Diet may very well be better than many of the alternatives. He helps steer meetings towards the direction of something that is at least productive, which is more than I can say compared to some of our members.

Lastly, Witch and Mercer get their says in. There’s nothing I really have to add at this point, save one thing.

“I’m also throwing my support behind Guardian Witch. Her service to the Peacekeepers and our city has been exemplary, and I see little reason not to trust her with this important responsibility. And of course, I will be doing all I can to support the rebuilding efforts, in light of the great challenge before us. I cede the floor.”

I notice Mercer and Yukari drinking at a table, and I decide to join the two.

“My, what a day.”

At least the anxiety of wondering how this is going to go is pretty much over, barring any surprises. Which may very well be too much to ask.

Zone One, The Everlasting Diet

Ran's unreadable golden eyes bored into Swain as he delivered his rebuttal, but as Myn reproached him and the rest of those who spoke mostly supported her proposals, she closed her eyes and let out a slow breath from her nose, then reopened them and resumed surveying the room. Even besides being a living mystical supercomputer who probably counted cards, one got the feeling it wouldn't be a good idea to play poker against her. Regardless, she stayed studiously silent until the time came to vote on the proposals currently on the floor.

Meanwhile, Yukari giggled at Mercer's comment, and when he sat back down, murmured conspiratorially into his ear, "I may have to take you up on that offer someday! Probably not tonight, but soon, perhaps."

As the former Dictator of K-Pop arrived in their vicinity, the hole near Mercer's middle closed, and reopened higher, near the tall lady's middle. "Ah, Areum, dear! What a day, indeed! We heard about that assassination business; simply dreadful! I hope you're holding up alright..." Yukari trailed off, reaching through to offer the giantess another Purple People-Eater. "Let us know if there's anything we can do for you, okay? Care for a drink to take the edge off?"

"Anyong, Areum-eonni!" a higher voice that sounded like a young lady carried through the gap, "I miss seeing you! Can we hang out sometime?"

"Ah, now there's an idea!" the Gap Youkai chimed in approvingly. "I've been thinking of going on an outing to the beach or hotsprings soon. Would you like to come with us, Areum?"

Zone Five, Barovian Backdoor - Boys' Night

Bondrewd sat at the bar at the club, his mask half up to reveal a pale white lower face with well-trimmed brown beard, the front page of the evening's special edition of the Concordance sitting folded to one side on the counter to use as a makeshift coaster. No need to trouble the barkeep with the ruffled shirt for a coaster during what was sure to be a busy night for the establishment. The Ship-Scientist had set his drink over the word "HUMANELY" on the main story, however, so the headline now read: "EGGMAN CRACKS, TAKES TOYS WITH HIM! WILL CITY DEAL WITH HIM LIKE HE DESERVES?"

"What a day, wouldn't you say, Leonardo?" he mused to his drinking partner on the stool beside him. "Not only does Eggman knock out an enormous amount of the city's industry, but of all people, Addward goes well and truly mad! I knew he was a bit... unique, but I never would have expected he had the kind of mindset needed to go on a shooting rampage! Why, it feels like just yesterday that I was talking with he and Rufus at Yagokoro General..." He sighed quietly, taking a sip of his drink, some kind of exotic liquor Leo had never heard of. "Well, anyway, I suppose you and Sonic will be able to get much better sleep now that the machinery isn't grinding away all night next door, eh?"

Edited by darksidevoid on Oct 3rd 2022 at 11:39:04 AM