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Dr. Birras James Tiberius Lincoln, more commonly known as Birras, is the first successful human clone, as well as the first in a planned series of clones of Abraham Lincoln. Created from dandruff DNA deep within the threads of Abraham Lincoln's hat, Birras was born in a scientific laboratory full of science in a secret underground bunker in Seattle, Washington. As with all government cloning programs, the clone is given the last name of the DNA donor, the first initial signifying how many times the person has been cloned (with the letter being the one after the previous clone or original donor, circling back around to 'A' should a 'Z' scenario appear), and the middle initial(s) representing any modifications to the DNA. Once the clone has reached age 13, s/he may choose a first and middle name. Lincoln's DNA, having aged for 150 years, needed to be stabilized. Using the experimental chemical 'Jerzkial-Ternium', the mad scientists managed to stabilize the DNA. However, the chemicals gave young Birras the insanity of a manatee, as well as an obsession with mad science.


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