An old classmate of Charlie and Alan is in town for a few days, and wants to meet up. Both Harper brothers recall how unattractive she was, and are shocked to find out that she has grown into a beautiful woman. The two brothers spar over who gets to take a run at her, while she seems interested in both.
Tropes:
- Best Served Cold: Charlie routinely mocked Jamie Eckleberry in high school for her ugliness behind her back, spreading her embarrassing nickname of 'Eckleberry Hound' around. Alan was friends with Jamie, but refused to show any romantic interest in her no matter how much she threw herself at him due to her unattractiveness. Jamie gets her revenge on both by getting into great shape and becoming a beautiful woman, showing up over a decade later, flirting with both, and then denying them the opportunity to sleep with her at the last moment.
- Embarrassing Nickname: Jamie was known as 'Eckleberry Hound' in high school due to how unattractive she was. As it turns out, Jamie was all too aware of it.
- Inspirational Insult: Her demeaning nickname in high school of 'Eckleberry Hound' (which Charlie did not invent, but did spread around) motivated Jamie to improve her looks and get into shape. She mentions the nickname being the thing that has driven her to not eat carbohydrates for over a decade.
- Oblivious to Love: When Alan and Jamie were friends as teenagers, Jamie did everything she could to try to get Alan to acknowledge her as a woman and show her romantic interest in him. Alan claimed to have not picked up on the signals due to being a stupid teenager, but could have easily been ignoring them due to how ugly she was.
