The Sorting continues. Whispering among the students gets too loud, causing McGonagall to demand their silence. When thee whispers resume, Dumbledore gets up; the students quiet down, causing him to sit again. Harry notes that another voice was speaking to him immediately after he removed the Sorting Hat, requesting that he meet the voice's snake.
More students are sorted, including Ron Weasley, who is given great applause, and Blaise Zabini.
Dumbledore approaches the podium to speak. Harry decides to try and experiment to see if Dumbledore is really the great wizard he is claimed to be. As Dumbledore greets the students, Harry uses Comed-Tea to obfuscate Dumbledore's speech.
- Dumbledore: Before we begin our banquet, I would like to say a few words. And here they are: Happy happy boom boom swamp swamp swamp! Thank you!
Harry notes that no one else noticed the strangeness of the obfuscation, causing Harry to ask a nearby Ravenclaw if they heard the same thing. The Ravenclaw says that Dumbledore is bonkers, but is secretly a mastermind. Harry deduces that the Comed-Tea can change reality to prevent the thing it changes from seeming strange to people who are not the Comed-Tea user; therefore, the Comed-Tea is omnipotent. Still, Harry sets tomorrow as the date he stops the path to "Dark Lord Harry". The banquet then starts, with Harry determined to try at least one instance of each meal.
At the end of the banquet, Harry puts together a list of tasks he should try to do during the school year:
- Research mind altering magical items, such as Comed-Tea.
- Coordinate with Hermione with accessing all the libraries available in Hogwarts, public or private, as well as determining if an interlibrary loan system exists.
- Research the mysterious phrase spoken after being sorted by the Hat.
- Determine if information-search-and-retrieval spells exist for quicker library usage.
- Find a way to swear Malfoy to secrecy so he can be asked about the mysterious phrase.
Harry is unsure on the 3rd and 1st to last items on the list, causing him to consider telling McGonagall about the mysterious phrase. He continues to make the list, adding a new item involving apologizing to Neville.
Dumbledore speaks again, stating that the Forbidden Forest is off-limits, no spells should be cast in the corridors between classes, new recruits for the Quidditch team should contact Hooch, and that new designs to Quidditch should be sent to Harry. Dumbledore warns to not enter the third-floor corridor on the right side on pain of death by deathtraps, and that Quirrel is the new Defense Against the Dark Ats teacher. The unorthodoxy of Dumbledore's speech puzzles Harry. Quirrel takes the podium and expresses his desire to be a good instructor. Dumbledore then tells the student body to sing the school song before going to bed.
