- "This Land":
Bill: What'd I do!?
- Every time John Kerry shows off his three Purple Hearts.
- Kerry putting a brain in Bush's head, accompanied by the line "Sometimes a brain can come in quite handy" and the headline "Big Story: Bush Receives Brain".
- Kerry claiming that Bush is "dumb as a doorknob".
- Bill Clinton fondling a girl wearing a green bikini and a Statue of Liberty headdress. Hillary then slaps him.
- "Good to Be in DC":
Kerry: I'm sensitive, I cannot lie.Edwards: I love to hug and kiss this guy.Jim McGreevey: Are they gay?Kerry: We won't say.Edwards: (in bed with Kerry) On our way.Kerry: D.C. Land!
- The newspaper at the beginning: "Country Divided! Liberal Wieners Vs. Right Wing Nut Jobs".
- The John Kerry/John Edwards verse:
Edwards: You twit!Both: That's how we talk in D.C.
- The vice presidential "debate":
Bill: We even did ménage à (Hillary slaps him) What'd I (Hillary slaps him again)
- "Hi, I'm Dan Rather and I approve this message... kinda... sorta, not really."
- A Vietnam War protester sets herself on fire burning her bra.
- Bill Clinton hitting on the nurses in the cardiac unitnote .
- John McCain: "I go both ways in D.C.!"
- "Big Box Mart":
- The factory worker's house is loaded with too much clutter from Big Box Mart. When he finally closes the front door, a child flies out of the chimney.
- The management chainsawing off a multi-box flowchart and replacing it with a single box labeled "cheap foreign labor".
- "So Long to Ya, 2010" (2010 Year in Review):Arnold Schwarzenegger: California just wants to get HIIIIIGH!
Funny / Jib Jab