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Live Blogs DOUBLE LIVEBLOG!! KSPAM Does A Side-By-Side Comparison Of NGE And RoE
KSPAM2011-02-09 15:24:36

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Episode 1: Welcome To The Military-I Mean NERV

Okay, here we go. This should be fun. Just as one last not-funny note, I'm going to try and take note of the little details in this liveblog so don't miss any of the important implications. Feel free to add anything (or pray for me >.<)

Ah, the opening. Universally known and more than a decade later still catchy as hell. Although it's still as inappropriate as ever.

"Young boy, become a legend"? Oh, he will. He will.

The subtitles helpfully inform us it is 2015. Well, now we know it isn't Planet X or planetary alignment that'll kill us in 2012. It'll be the goddamn Angels. Speaking of Angels, we're diving right in and I mean that literally. The Third Angel (I can't remember its name and frankly you shouldn't have expected me to) swims through the (blue!) ocean like the world's largest Olympic competitor.

A public announcement warns the people to stay in the shelters. OH REALLY? AND HERE I WAS GOING TO GO SAY HI TO THE ENORMOUS SOUL DEVOURING MONSTROSITY!

Shinji felt like doing just that apparently, as he tries to make a phone call, which is unfortunately denied. Now please insert fifty more cents. He regrets that he won't be meeting Ms. Fanservice Misato today and wonders if he should find a shelter.

Also, ZOMG TEH REIZ!!1!1

Today's forecast calls for high-speed winds and a one hundred percent chance OF DESTRUCTION AHAHAHAHAHA! The Angel plows its way through military, cutting through them more easily than a Zabuza sword cuts through rice paper. D Own at NERV headquarters, Gendo and Fuyutsuki watch in a bemused I'm-watching-Saturday-morning-cartoons kind of way.

Outside, EVERY SINGLE MISSILE HIT THE TARGET! Really? 'Cause I don't think that train station was your target. The Angel continues to stare on dumbfounded, probably wondering what tickles so goddamn much. The generals continue their dramatic shouting and pencil-snapping while more of the taxpayer's precious money goes to waste. At least they don't have to deal with the Tea Party :P

Fuyutsuki helpfully notes that we've got an AT Field on our hands. You'd think after the first two Angels they'd be used to this. The generals call in their last ditch effort. As the totally-not-a-nuke goes off underneath the oblivious Angel's feet, Misato sees it just in time to get down. And all over Shinji. Little bastard must really be enjoying this.

The generals rejoice at the massive explosion, congratulating eachothe ron defeating the Angel. They're new to this genre, aren't they? Misato and Shinji tilt the car back on its wheels. She thanks Shinji for being so useful. Now let's pray it'll last.

The generals make an unpleasant discovery and I'm forced to listen to more of Misato trip over herself. While the inner monologue was kind of funny, the rest of the dialogue in this scene is kind of cringe worthy. Not to mention the massive amount of come-ons Misato's throwing at Shinji. They finally get to the gate and the dialogue gives us our first indicator that Shinji and Gendo don't really get along.

Gendo takes command of the operation upstairs and gets down to business. He tells Fuyutsuki they're going to activate Unit 01. "Another spare has been found."

Dick.

Misato asks Shinji for the ID Gendo sent him and gives him a manual labeled "Welcome to NERV". CONGRATULATIONS YOU'VE BEEN DRAFTED.

Shinji sighs, affirming the very solid fact that his dad wouldn't send for him unless he needed something. Five minutes later and they've gotten themselves well and lost. The intercom crackles and sends Ritsuko an order to go find them. She unzips the swimsuit and heads off. And apparently she decided not to change into something else. Nope, just slap on a lab coat. Real professional.

They all board the escalator and make their way to Unit 01. Ritsuko goes on about how the Unit hasn't activated yet. According to her, the probability is about .000000000001% (give or take a few zeroes). They take Shinji into the Unit's antechamber and the lights go out. They come back on and

"Oh my god, it's a face! A giant robot!" AH DURRRRR

Some bullying and emotional manipulation later (yes I'm skipping over Rei's official introduction), Shinji decides he mustn't run away. GODDAMMIT I BETTER NOT HEAR THIS AS MUCH AS I'VE BEEN TOLD I WILL.

He gets in the mech like a good little boy and they flood the entry plug with LCL. MM MM MM LILITH BLOOD

His synch rate is high, the systems are nominal and the visual effects are sparkly as all hell. "Evangelion Unit 01..." TRANSFORM AND ROLL OUT, BITCH! The mech flies to the surface to confront the Angel! And... that's next episode. Okay, whatever. Leave us hanging.


That's episode 1, episode 2 is incoming. For real this time :P

EDIT: Okay, I Did Not Do The Research at all. Yeah.... Amazing how different her voice sounds in the beginning versus later installments...

Comments

melloncollie Since: Dec, 1969
Feb 9th 2011 at 9:54:25 PM
Have you... not seen Eva before? This feels really weird!
KSPAM Since: Dec, 1969
Feb 10th 2011 at 2:50:48 PM
No, actually I haven't. This is my first time through the actual series, although I've caught bits and pieces now and again.
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