1 | !!'''From Top 10 Lists''' |
2 | * ''10 Things WWE Wants You To Forget About Ric Flair'' |
3 | --> ''"Ric Flair retired from professional wrestling in 2008 after his [[Tearjerker/RicFlair excellent retirement match]] against Wrestling/ShawnMichaels at [[Wrestling/WrestleMania WrestleMania XXIV]]. However, after years of living his gimmick as the jet flying, Rolex watch buying, tax avoiding, credit destroy...ed-ding..., h--yeah..."'' |
4 | * ''15 Worst Physiques In WWE History'' (with Wrestling/{{Rikishi}} at no. 6) |
5 | --> ''"On his wrestling résumé, under skills, he just puts the word "ass"; [[ReadingTheStageDirectionsOutLoud in brackets, "all about that", close brackets.]]"'' |
6 | * Speaking of physiques, ''[[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w_mzv0Nfv24 10 Times Vince [=McMahon=] Loved Big, Sweaty Men]]'' all because of [[LargeHam King Ross.]] |
7 | |
8 | * ''10 Wrestling Moves That Could Legit Kill You'' |
9 | ** The description of a piledriver causing a depressed skull fracture and brain herniation isn't very funny. The accompanying graphic of a cartoonish skull popping open to reveal the brain, which (via Adam) promptly says "Hello!" followed by "Goodbye, I'm dead!" in the most deadpan tone imaginable, on the other hand? [[BlackComedy Hilarious.]] |
10 | ** Adam Blampied gives an accurate summation of Wrestling/{{Goldust}}'s [[GroinAttack Shattered Dreams]]: |
11 | ---> ''"Now, let's make one thing very clear: the idea of someone taking a running punt at my [[UnusualEuphemism flobberdobbers]] makes me upset with a totality I find hard to express. This noise best sums it up: NYAAAAAWAYFROMMYTOTS."'' |
12 | ** And later, an equally-accurate summation of Wrestling/{{Yokozuna}}'s [[AssKicksYou Banzai Drop]]: |
13 | ---> ''"Plus, of all the ways to die... a fat guy sitting on you. If that happens to me, lie to my mother and tell her I died doing something more dignified, like erotic asphyxiation."'' |
14 | * Similarly, ''10 Wrestling Moves WWE Banned For Being Too Dangerous'': |
15 | ** Adam Blampied discusses no. 8, the Curb Stomp. |
16 | ---> ''"It was seen as, [[ReadingTheStageDirectionsOutLoud quotation marks, "too dangerous", quotation marks]], for the kids at home."'' |
17 | ** No. 5, the [[Wrestling/ManamiToyota Victory Star Drop]] [[note]]A top rope bodyscissors ''backflip'' into a back-to-back kneeling piledriver. If your first reaction to reading those words was a mental shriek of existential terror, then congratulations, you're both a wrestling fan and still sane.[[/note]] is accurately summarized by Adam as being "Next in the [[CensoredForComedy "F@!# You Necks!"]] World Tour,". Upon number 4 being shown (The Dragon Screw Neck Whip [[note]]Elevated DDT where the legs are suspended from the top rope and the performer twists the target's head around as they're brought down; this results in significant force being exerted on the head and neck[[/note]]) he promptly lets out this incredibly appropriate line: |
18 | ---> ''[[YouHaveGotToBeKiddingMe Why do wrestlers hate necks?!]]'' |
19 | * Adam Blampied's [[RhymesOnADime rhyming names]] for the WWE or WWE events, that usually namedrop Wrestling/VinceMcMahon. |
20 | ** "Vince's House of Winces" |
21 | ** "Vince [=McMahon=]'s Punchbox Lunch Box" |
22 | ** "Vince [=McMahon=]'s Tan 'n Slam Caravan" or "Vince [=McMahon=]'s Grapple Van" |
23 | ** "Sweaty Vincent's Muscled Contingent" |
24 | ** "Vince's Company of Rugged Thuggery" |
25 | ** "Vinnie Mac's Attack Shack" |
26 | ** "Dr. Vinnie's Hussle and Tussle Kerfuffle" |
27 | ** "Big Vincent's House of Incidents" |
28 | ** "Vince's Thump 'n Bump Company" |
29 | ** "Vince's Community of Violent Impunity" |
30 | ** "Vince's Marketplace of Kicks to the Face" |
31 | ** "Two for Wrestling/WrestleMania: "The Glittering Meat and Fireworks Circus", and "[[DepartmentOfRedundancyDepartment The Momentous 'Momentum of Moments' Moment]]" |
32 | * ''10 Things WWE Wants You To Forget About Kane'' |
33 | --> ''"Wrestling/{{Kane}} (wearing a welding mask for some reason) tried to get John Cena to [[FaceHeelTurn turn bad]], which is like trying to [[ImpossibleTask get a boat to turn chocolate]]."'' |
34 | * [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A0_zOs98Hdg "10 Things WWE Wants You To Forget About The Rock"]]: |
35 | ** Adam's disgusted reaction to an actual Brahma bull, calling it "a cow with a goiter". |
36 | ** Adam discusses Wrestling/TheRock's gynecomastia surgery: |
37 | ---> ''"The Rock having breast reduction surgery is not funny. It's not funny. Don't laugh. The Rock having breast reduction surgery is not funny. Stop laughing. It's not funny."'' |
38 | * Any time Adam takes a shot at Wrestling/VinceMcMahon, most notably calling him "Madder than a Sex frog". |
39 | * Adam getting distracted by Wrestling/ShawnMichaels ''Playgirl'' photo until Bingley snaps him out of it. |
40 | * ''10 Most Protected Finishing Moves In WWE'': Adam talking about Wrestling/RandyOrton's punt kick. |
41 | --> ''"It put Wrestling/{{Batista}} [[PutOnABus on the shelf]], [[Wrestling/MickFoley Foley]], Wrestling/JohnCena's dad, titans of the industry, all of them, and it hurt Husky Harris so much, [[FromNobodyToNightmare he went mental and became]] Wrestling/BrayWyatt."'' |
42 | * A brief but hilarious VisualPun in the introduction to [[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MRJJNpqmGjw "10 Things WWE Wants You To Forget About Bayley"]]- while Simon was describing how Bayley had been "dragged over the coals" by poor booking, a quick animation played of a giant hand pulling Bayley across a bed of hot coals, with the heads of Wrestling/MichaelCole and Wrestling/AdamCole sticking out of it. |
43 | * ''10 Shocking WWE Plans That Almost Happened'' features Adam's side-splitting summary of Wrestling/HulkHogan's WagTheDirector tendencies: |
44 | --> ''"Hulk Hogan is about as difficult to do business with as someone who doesn't speak your language, [[ShapedLikeItself doesn't want to do business with you]] and is dead."'' |
45 | ** From the same video, his description of Wrestling/VinceRusso: |
46 | ---> ''"Vince Russo was a creative madman, like [[Literature/CharlieAndTheChocolateFactory Willy Wonka]] [[ToiletHumor but that wasn't chocolate in the factory]]. [[LampshadeHanging Poo joke!]]"'' |
47 | ** Adam mentions that Wade Barrett was considered to break Wrestling/TheUndertaker's Streak if his NXT heat kept building. The very next image is that of Wrestling/JohnCena advancing on the camera with a [[VisualPun shovel in his hand]] as a deadpan Adam comments "We all know what happened to ''that''." |
48 | * ''10 Best Tales From Wrestlers' Court'': |
49 | ** When Adam mentions Wrestling/BobHolly going to the funfair: |
50 | --->'''Adam:''' "Because of course, [[SarcasmMode this is a face that says "Fun"]].\ |
51 | ''[Close-up on Holly's glaring face. The background shifts to a large fire, which Holly's eyes reflect.]''\ |
52 | '''Adam:''' "Look at his "Fun" face." |
53 | ** The infamous Divas Dodgeball is referenced with a pair of amusing visual gags: when discussing the male locker room's reaction to the match, Undertaker is shown with [[DeathGlare his usual ominous expression]] contrasted by [[PassThePopcorn the massive bucket of popcorn in his lap]]. When the female locker room are hauled into the eponymous KangarooCourt, Adam verbally double-takes upon hearing that Wrestling/ValVenis was the prosecutor, before dropping this gem: |
54 | ---> ''(As a [[CastingCouch couch and video camera]] appear beside Venis)'' "This sounds like how one of his "Special Movies" starts." |
55 | ** The visual representation of Wrestling/Goldberg's run with the WWE: [[TakeThat two cars crashing into one another with a very annoyed-looking Goldberg in one and the WWE logo on the other.]] |
56 | * ''10 Worst Botches In WWE History'' |
57 | ** On Wrestling/SidEudy's [[MemeticMutation issues with cutting promos]]: |
58 | ---> "The words would leave his brain fine, but then they'd stop off for a few beers on the way to his mouth; [[AlcoholInducedIdiocy a few would turn into a lot, and then the words would die of alcohol poisoning]]. And that's a [[{{Narm}} Sid promo]]. |
59 | ** When discussing Hulk Hogan's [[EpicFail inability to jump more than an inch off the canvas]] when the Undertaker went for a chokeslam at ''Judgement Day'' 2002, Adam notes that it could be the result of [[RingOldies Hogan's age...]] or because gravity is ''not'' in fact a [[MemeticMutation Hulkamaniac]]. |
60 | ** Adam refers to Brock Lesnar's infamous botch of a Shooting Star Press at Wrestlemania as "[Lesnar] soaring through the sky with the grace of an eagle [[BlackComedy being snatched out of the sky by a screaming bear.]]" |
61 | * ''10 Things WWE Wants You To Forget About CM Punk'' |
62 | ** 'No. 8: His time with TNA' is a humorous look at the lengths WWE goes to ignore [[Wrestling/ImpactWrestling TNA]] in their programming. |
63 | ---> "WWE [[PersonaNonGrata doesn't talk about TNA--ever!]] When a wrestler like [[Wrestling/RobVanDam RVD]] disappears for a bit to be on TNA, Vince is like, ''[='=]Oh, RVD? No idea. Where is he? He's probably...dead! Yeah, that's it! RVD stands for [[HashtagForLaughs [=#ReallyVeryDead=].]] Hey, [[Awesome/MoneyInTheBank RVD's back!]] Where've you been, RVD? DOESN'T MATTER. Oh, he's gone again, he's dead.[='=]''" [...] "WWE was happy to mention Wrestling/RingOfHonor [on the "Best in the World" DVD] but TNA? T-N-Noooo-way." (Shot of a [[LamePunReaction tumbleweed.]]) "[[PrecisionFStrike Bugger]] off." |
64 | *** When Blampied says "ever", it is [[VisualGag punctuated]] by a scene from an episode of ''WebVideo/TheEdgeAndChristianShow'' [[note]]https://www.wwe.com/videos/wwe-network-edge-and-christian-induct-aj-styles-into-the-mullet-club at 0:56[[/note]] which shows a TV screen displaying "The company that Wrestling/AJStyles wrestled for, between 2002-2014". |
65 | |
66 | |
67 | !!'''From Adam's Pipebombs''' |
68 | |
69 | * Blampied's love affair with Toots Mondt is mentioned again in the [[https://youtu.be/eqx9eoEvuoo?list=PLnUzD-I9acZeo_FHX6hHBhBIfnTyzloA3&t=75 pipebomb about El Santo]]. |
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